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Saturday, May 24, 2008

Boston Red Sox (31-20) @ Oakland Athletics (26-23), Saturday, May 24, 2008, 9:05pm

BOS: Josh Beckett (28, RHP, 5-3, 4.67)
OAK: Justin Duchscherer (30, RHP, 3-3, 2.67)

The Primer Chimp Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:00 AM | 159 comment(s)
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   1. Greg Maddux School of Reflexive Profanity Posted: May 24, 2008 at 08:24 PM (#2793527)
3B Burned up on re-entryno free tacos®   .224  .361  .344
SS Porcelain Mormon®                       .267  .329  .398
LF Skylab
...it crashed to earthsee?®     .258  .434  .462
DH Odessey 
and Oracle®                     .305  .408  .512
1B Keebler 3
:16®                           .302  .353  .415
CF Animal Mother®                          .294  .360  .385
RF I hate this fuckin
' guy already®        .254  .282  .389
2B Oedipus®                                .242  .326  .395
C  Wanna split a pineapple?®               .240  .301  .298



P  Rooster Cogburn®
   2. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 08:57 PM (#2793537)
I feel that I have been that hard ###### sideways that my head is still ringing - could be the worse hangover ever
   3. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:06 PM (#2793540)
That was sad - poor kid
   4. Greg Maddux School of Reflexive Profanity Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:06 PM (#2793541)
Aww, you're bringing me down with the hero of Operation Aphrodite's widow...
   5. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:14 PM (#2793544)
Hey guys.

I smell a losing streak coming on...
   6. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:16 PM (#2793545)
Ooh...would have been incredible if caught.
   7. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:17 PM (#2793546)
I smell a losing streak coming on...



They're on the road, it's a given.

Uh, why is there a huge gas tank on the field of play next to the A's bullpen? Isn't that, uh, dangerous?
   8. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:17 PM (#2793547)
Hey teddy - I'm picking up a waft here as well. Playing on the road is about as fun as drinking heavily for two days and knocking yourself out with sleeping tablets to soften the blow each night
   9. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:17 PM (#2793548)
I love Cappy and all that, but he had Josh throw about 7 consecutive outside fastballs to the leadoff guy.

Helluva catch. Wow.
   10. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:17 PM (#2793549)
Jacoby !
   11. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:18 PM (#2793550)
That was an astounding catch.
   12. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:19 PM (#2793551)
Beckett seems off a bit...
   13. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:20 PM (#2793553)
Nice range Cora.
   14. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:20 PM (#2793554)
Cora=Jeter.
   15. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:21 PM (#2793555)
What's the story on Ellsbury's Iverson sleeve?
   16. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:21 PM (#2793556)
Beckett still hasn't figured out his curveball, it appears. Last few starts he kept hanging them; now he's so focused on keeping it down he can't get it anywhere near the strike zone.
   17. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:22 PM (#2793557)
Finally throws a good one to Cust.
   18. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:22 PM (#2793558)
Home plate ump Joyce's strike squeal is kinda funny.
   19. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:23 PM (#2793560)
Cust looking breaking ball I have to guess...
   20. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:25 PM (#2793562)
#### that catch was cool - Manny might not have made that.....
   21. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:25 PM (#2793563)
Even though he's working on his 8th straight season below this number, Frank Thomas has a
carreer OPS+ of 157.
   22. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:27 PM (#2793564)
Youks looks like a guy from Pelican Bay or something.
   23. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:28 PM (#2793565)
Duchscherer has jammed 4 of the 5 guys he's faced so far.
   24. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:29 PM (#2793569)
Youks looks like a guy from Pelican Bay or something.


Unlikely candidate for Aryan Nation membership, however.
   25. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:29 PM (#2793570)
5 of 6...
   26. Greg Maddux School of Reflexive Profanity Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:29 PM (#2793571)
Cust looking breaking ball I have to guess...

Throw Cust three front door sinkers and he'll take them all and trudge back to the bench. I don't think I've ever seen him swing at one.
   27. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:29 PM (#2793572)
Unlikely candidate for Aryan Nation membership, however.


You never know.
   28. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:33 PM (#2793573)
Burned by another Varitek outside fastball.
   29. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:33 PM (#2793574)
I can't see how its a good idea to suddenly enforce these things during the season.
The gotta do it at the start of ST, now now. Bad form.

Cheap leadoff double. F*ck.
   30. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:34 PM (#2793575)
Thanks for the out.
   31. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:34 PM (#2793576)
Somewhere in the bowels of the stadium, Billy Beane just threw a chair.
   32. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:34 PM (#2793577)
Nice doubleclutch, Cora. Even better throw.
   33. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:35 PM (#2793578)
Another fine play by Cora. #### Little Ballplayer.
   34. Greg Maddux School of Reflexive Profanity Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:36 PM (#2793579)
"RBI Machine comes through"? He hit a weakass grounder, Ray.
   35. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:36 PM (#2793580)
I'll tell you...Beckett is as slow hell to throw a pitch with a man on.
   36. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:37 PM (#2793583)
Beckett not nailing any key pitches yet...
   37. plink Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:37 PM (#2793584)
I can stomach Lugo, barely. But having Lugo and Cora on the same team just seems... insulting, unless you're only carrying 10 pitchers.
   38. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:38 PM (#2793587)
Has Beckett gotten a single swing and miss yet? I don't think so.
   39. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:39 PM (#2793588)
F*ck. Here comes the f*cking crooked number.
   40. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:40 PM (#2793589)
I was just thinking that...no swings and misses.
   41. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:41 PM (#2793590)
Lucky--that ball was smoked.

Is Beckett tipping his pitches again?
   42. kevin Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:41 PM (#2793591)
Celtics are kicking ass on the Pistons. The Pistons defense is being way too aggressive and they are paying a huge price for it.
   43. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:41 PM (#2793592)
Another not-very-hard-hit line drive, this one fortunately at a fielder.
   44. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:42 PM (#2793593)
Does that count? A tip into the glove for strike one?
   45. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:42 PM (#2793594)
First swing and miss, although of the foul tip variety.
   46. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:43 PM (#2793595)
Another foul tip? Sounded like it.
   47. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:43 PM (#2793596)
Looked like he was supposed to come inside, but the ball drifted outside, and he got his swing and miss. Big one.
   48. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:45 PM (#2793597)
Not so bold prediction:

If the C's hold on tonight, they'll take the series.
   49. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:47 PM (#2793598)
Started outside, stayed outside.
   50. kevin Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:47 PM (#2793600)
Kind of a no-brainer there, teddy.

It's just a matter of the young players becoming accustomed to the different pace and physicality of playoff basketball. If you ask me, the Pistons are a team on the other side of the hill. They have an experience advantage, but no other one. And the experience advantage will diminish further every game.
   51. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:49 PM (#2793602)
BTW, not surprisingly, 'Tek's splits are much better vs finess hitters than power pitchers.

I guess Doosh is what, power? Marginally?
   52. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:49 PM (#2793603)
You swung at ball four on the 3-1 Cora. Trying to preserve the perfect game for him?
   53. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:51 PM (#2793604)
Oakland TV just played where is my mind - cool
   54. Bicycle RepairMan Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:51 PM (#2793605)
For the trivia Q, think Ruth and WIlliams are 2 of the answers? Who is the third? Thomas or Foxx ? I will go with Thomas..
   55. Bicycle RepairMan Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:52 PM (#2793606)
I feel that I have been that hard ###### sideways that my head is still ringing - could be the worse hangover ever

What bet did you lose?!
   56. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:53 PM (#2793607)
Tigers 19 Twins 3? Yikes.
   57. Bicycle RepairMan Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:53 PM (#2793608)
Ahh, Foxx :(
   58. Bicycle RepairMan Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:54 PM (#2793609)
Tigers 19 Twins 3? Yikes.


They are going to have a dandy pythag for a last place team
   59. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:55 PM (#2793611)
Just a beautiful curve ball there to get Cust looking - that was amazing
   60. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:56 PM (#2793613)
Joyce is fairly incredible with that odd squeal of his: HY--HEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!
   61. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:56 PM (#2793614)
I am shocked, shocked that Varitek called for a high outside fastball on both 0-2 and 1-2. Why Big Frank, with all his experience, wasn't aware of what was coming is beyond me.
   62. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:58 PM (#2793616)
'Tek usually asks for the lowish and away 0-2 fastball.
   63. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 09:59 PM (#2793618)
Another air out.
   64. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:00 PM (#2793620)
But you'd think one would know enough to look away 0-2, true enough there.
   65. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:01 PM (#2793622)
Pedroia now officially has no plate discipline remaining. Well's totally empty.
   66. Bicycle RepairMan Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:01 PM (#2793626)
Well's totally empty

Thats how David feels most of the time.
   67. kevin Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:01 PM (#2793627)
Yes or no. The Duchscherer/Mirabelli was worth it?
   68. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:03 PM (#2793628)
What bet did you lose?!


Birthday Celebrations
   69. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:04 PM (#2793629)
And the perfecto remains intact.

At least someone finally hit something hard.
   70. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:04 PM (#2793630)
The Duchscherer/Mirabelli was worth it?


Flags fly forever. Or course it was! ;-)
   71. kevin Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:04 PM (#2793631)
It looked to me the Pistons thought they had gotten into the heads of the Celtics and if they just showed them some pressure, the C's would collapse. But they took the initial hit and then used the Pistons aggression against them. It's now the Pistons who look like they are confused and out of sync.
   72. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:05 PM (#2793632)
The best part is that it's another Rodrigo Lopez Memorial Junkballing Righty start. Fastball hasn't topped 87.
   73. kevin Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:06 PM (#2793634)
I'm not watching. Is Beckett dealing? His line makes it look like he is.
   74. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:06 PM (#2793635)
Josh with the nifty little running grab.
   75. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:07 PM (#2793637)
Eh, sort of...
   76. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:08 PM (#2793638)
That was nice. My favorite pitch of the night.
   77. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:08 PM (#2793639)
Good quick inning.
   78. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:10 PM (#2793640)
He's throwing well. Starting to stick the breaking balls in there.
   79. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:13 PM (#2793642)
Joyce has that big zone 'cause he likes to mhear himself go "HY--HEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!"
   80. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:13 PM (#2793643)
It's now the Pistons who look like they are confused and out of sync.


Hope they can hold on kevin
   81. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:14 PM (#2793644)
We're gonna get perfecto'd. I could live with that.
   82. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:15 PM (#2793645)
The Sox look like Phil feels.
   83. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:17 PM (#2793647)
Groundball pitcher giving up nothing but outs in the air and getting away with it. Really, really terrible offensive performance. Doesn't look like a single guy other than Ortiz has made an adjustment second time through the order.
   84. IronChef Chris Wok Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:17 PM (#2793648)
The Sox look like Phil feels.

Fail?
   85. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:23 PM (#2793650)
Well, there goes the perfecto.
   86. kevin Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:25 PM (#2793651)
They're up 20 again, Phil. Perkins is having a monster game.
   87. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:26 PM (#2793652)
That pitch to Coco caught a ton of plate. No excuse for not at least fouling it off.
   88. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:26 PM (#2793653)
Terrific.
   89. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:27 PM (#2793654)
And Cora says: HACK!
   90. Elevate Phil Coorey Later Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:29 PM (#2793655)
82. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:15 PM (#2793645)
The Sox look like Phil feels.

tell me about it

I'm feeling sorry for myself in a live update on my blog as well...
   91. tfbg9 Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:30 PM (#2793656)
He's really hitting the glove. Just goes to show ya'--location and movement can be enough to get outs.
Not like this of course, enough to steadily succeed.

Still a no-no thru 6...
   92. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:30 PM (#2793657)
And Ellsbury chases way off the plate to ground out weakly.
   93. The Orodruin of DOOM Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:31 PM (#2793659)
calling Duke a junkballing righty is hilariousl inaccurate. He doesn't throw hard, but he locates well, and has two plus pitches - the cutter and the curve. A few years ago his curve was one of the best in the game.
   94. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:31 PM (#2793660)
A's TV put up a graphic showing that the Duke sucks when he puts men on base: .364 BAA vs. .188 when they're empty. Except when Crisp, Cora, and Ellsbury are up.
   95. IronChef Chris Wok Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:35 PM (#2793661)
Last time I saw the Sox live at McAfee in 06, I was in the LF bleachers. And Frank Thomas golfed one off Keith Foulke OVER MY HEAD for about 100 rows back
   96. Greg Maddux School of Reflexive Profanity Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:36 PM (#2793662)
###### on both ends.
   97. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:36 PM (#2793663)
Two gift calls.
   98. kevin Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:37 PM (#2793664)
Celts up 23 with 35 seconds left in the third.

I guess they answered the question about whether they can win on the road or not.
   99. plink Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:38 PM (#2793665)
Definitely safe, but Crosby only tagged the far side of the bag -- there's no way the ump could have seen the hand get in first.
   100. Chip Posted: May 24, 2008 at 10:39 PM (#2793666)
Nice read, Coco.
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