In the word of Dr. Gene Ray, (told to me in a personal email,) baseball is great because “[It] is a game of Cubic values, wherein no individual can ocupy or experience more than one (1) of its 4 simultaneous corners at the same time - during a 4 corner rotation.” You can’t argue with that.

Well, I’m a fan of the Chicago White Sox. Can’t beat Frank Thomas. Johnny Mostil was an interesting character. Bo Jackson was a favorite of mine growin’ up.

Baseball history’s nice.

In general, baseball’s pretty swell. Keen, even.

Arth-rod McPinch-Nez

Bluepoint K. Calamari

Venn-Diagram Jones

Q. Popcornitis Eddinston

Jaundice “Very Much” Henderson

Gary PinAppel

H. Callous Balakolous

Charles St. Charles

“Atomic” Leonard Braylow

Neddington Lavery Puddingsworth

The Crosser of Large Roads

Jump Man Jackson

Thyroid P. Vaccination

Zeg “Zegger” Norton

Alexander Lip

Roy S. Pentameter

Will-Boy Ukulele McGee

Plantation Jr.

Mickey Oligarchy

Benny Hitler

Benny Friendly

J.P. Flavor-Ice

Thomas Clandestine: “The Sneaker”

Sassafras N. Rhyme-Scheme

Boise, Idaho

Javelin J. Spectacular

Flavian H. Wonderbean

Dwight the Purloiner

Dr. Tarantula Rex H. B. Henderson (of the Newark Hendersons)

A Lankier Lummox

Match Malliweajy

Pleasant, Pleasant, Pleasant Freddy Freddy Bandick

Tangerine Taddy, the Self-Esteem King

Rutherford Cauliflower Blim Blam Bleeson

Yakima Shorty

Y.B. Vigor