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Tuesday, June 30, 2009

AJC: Francoeur breaks out lucky ‘turkey underwear’

Desperate times call for desperate measures, so Braves right fielder Jeff Francoeur said he’ll wear the same underwear to Turner Field Tuesday that he wore on Sunday. He claimed the Braves are 7-0 when he wears his Thanksgiving-themed “turkey underwear” to the ballpark.

For a team that has a disappointing 35-40 overall record, that 7-0 mark is no small feat. The Braves open a three-game series against NL East leader Philadelphia on Tuesday.

Francoeur said he had not worn the turkey briefs for back-to-back games all season, but will Tuesday (the Braves were off Monday, and he planned to ask his wife, Catie, to wash the underwear).

Tripon Posted: June 30, 2009 at 01:52 AM | 32 comment(s) | Login to Bookmark
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   1. The Kids Are Enright (1k5v3L) Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:29 AM (#3237484)
   2. Dan The Mediocre Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:33 AM (#3237487)
Just because the skid marks form a vague turkey shape doesn't mean it's Thanksgiving themed.
   3. Dan Szymborski Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:50 AM (#3237491)

Great news for you Atlanta Braves Baseball Club fanatics out there! I'm bringing out the Hanes Tagless Shorts brand boxers that feature Butterball brand turkeys prominently. These boxers provide fortune in every situation and secure my FrancoeurTech FleshHugger scrotum whether I'm waiting in the Delta SkyLounge or chowing down on a mere 410-calorie Chik-Fil-A Chargrilled Chicken Cool Wrap. We need a lot of points to win a baseball match so I expect our Whirlpool High Efficiency Washer will have lots of work to do!

Don't forget to cast your vote for your favorite Atlanta Brave for the Major League Baseball All-Star Game! If you click the Sprint banner opportunity next to the ballot, you can win great savings on the latest and greatest phones! What are some of your favorite banner opportunities?

I have to go now to win some games for the Atlanta Braves. Me and my outfield mates, Garrett Andriessen and Nate McCloud have some games to win! And don't forget, July 2nd is National Public Relations Employee Day so make sure to buy great gifts!
   4. Dan The Mediocre Posted: June 30, 2009 at 04:05 AM (#3237496)
Szym, who wrote that?
   5. Dan Szymborski Posted: June 30, 2009 at 04:20 AM (#3237499)
Me. I just like blockquotes for authentic mocking.
   6. Dan The Mediocre Posted: June 30, 2009 at 04:31 AM (#3237501)
Someone needs to make a Francoeur Blog Post Generator.
   7. Justin T contains indigenous nudity Posted: June 30, 2009 at 04:34 AM (#3237502)
I have this same pair. I usually only bring them out when I need something to turn my baster on though.
   8. RollingWave Posted: June 30, 2009 at 05:49 AM (#3237510)
/face palm
   9. Chipper Jonestown Massacre Posted: June 30, 2009 at 06:16 AM (#3237516)
For God's sake, don't wash them...
You'll wash the "luck" right out of them.

They need to so crusty that they'll stand up on their own when you take them off...

It's the only way!
Sacrifices need to be made...
   10. Frenchy's Disapppearing VORP Posted: June 30, 2009 at 06:23 AM (#3237517)
Boxers or briefs?

How can we verify that French was actually wearing the underwear during the seven wins? And how did Frenchy do during those games?
   11. flournoy Posted: June 30, 2009 at 11:56 AM (#3237566)
Boxers or briefs?


Briefs. It says so there in the excerpt.

We now have a Francoeur underwear thread. I think this is the true pinnacle of BTF.
   12. bunyon Posted: June 30, 2009 at 12:03 PM (#3237570)
Indeed, Chipper. You don't wash "lucky" clothing. Dear god, who is teaching this young man proper superstition procedure? No wonder he sucks.
   13. Shooty: Applying to be Fearless Leader Posted: June 30, 2009 at 12:03 PM (#3237571)
At least we're not talking about his gettin' lucky underwear.
   14. Designated Sitter (GGC) Posted: June 30, 2009 at 12:15 PM (#3237578)
Me. I just like blockquotes for authentic mocking.


Why do you and Repoz like pinatas? You're just poisoning the well.
   15. John DiFool2 Posted: June 30, 2009 at 12:23 PM (#3237584)
Just because the skid marks form a vague turkey shape doesn't mean it's Thanksgiving themed.


If Francoeur is cooked it does.
   16. Answer Guy Posted: June 30, 2009 at 12:46 PM (#3237600)
At least we're not talking about his gettin' lucky underwear.


Presumably he would wash that underwear.
   17. Hello Rusty Kuntz, Goodbye Rusty Cars Posted: June 30, 2009 at 12:50 PM (#3237603)
It wasn't lucky for the turkey.
   18. Shooty: Applying to be Fearless Leader Posted: June 30, 2009 at 12:52 PM (#3237608)
I have to say, I'm impressed that no one has gone for the easy turkey neck jokes here. BBTF is growing up!
   19. Colin Posted: June 30, 2009 at 02:12 PM (#3237677)
I hate Jeff Francoeur.
   20. flournoy Posted: June 30, 2009 at 02:32 PM (#3237694)
It could just be that no one is familiar with turkey neck jokes. I know I'm not, but I've been out of the loop before. Is it anything like choking the chicken?
   21. Crispix Attacks Posted: June 30, 2009 at 02:34 PM (#3237697)
Like fluornoy, the only reason I have not made a turkey neck joke is that I have no idea what a turkey neck joke would be. Something like "pencil neck geek", maybe? Or is it about hicks eating turkey necks?
   22. wjones Posted: June 30, 2009 at 02:46 PM (#3237711)
How can we verify that French was actually wearing the underwear during the seven wins? And how did Frenchy do during those games?

It's always a safe bet to assume he did poorly.
   23. bfan Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:06 PM (#3237732)
Good lord, AJC. If you can't write anything nice about him (because of his lack of performance), then make up something that vaguely resembles "cute".
   24. Eric P. Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:20 PM (#3237758)
He's saving the turducken speedo for the playoffs.
   25. Shooty: Applying to be Fearless Leader Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:26 PM (#3237766)
   26. Designated Sitter (GGC) Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:32 PM (#3237775)
I was more familiar with definition 2.
   27. Shooty: Applying to be Fearless Leader Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:33 PM (#3237778)
I was more familiar with definition 2.

Don't you feel like you've improved yourself with KNOWLEDGE?
   28. rb's team is hopeful for the new year! Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:36 PM (#3237780)
It's always a safe bet to assume he did poorly.

lol.

It's a ####### lock.
   29. robinred Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:42 PM (#3237787)
Hey Guys!

When I got back from our last road trip, I stopped in at the Delta VIP lounge to unwind--and wow! I found out that Delta has their own on-site laundry service, for the baggage handlers, food service worker, and Skycaps. A couple of those guys told me what a big difference that makes when they work those long shifts in the summer. Probably worse than standing in the outfield all day! Share your stories about sweating up a storm on the job in the summer, and remember that Delta has flights to call kinds of "cool" places all summer long!

Take it easy,

Jeff
   30. 25 Classic Love Songs by Sid Bream Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:45 PM (#3237794)
Can we at least agree that Jeff is now in on his own joke? Because the only thing that's keeping me from hanging myself from my belt in my office's men's room right now is the hope that there's some sort of meta-humor going on here.
   31. The Yankee Clapper Posted: June 30, 2009 at 03:54 PM (#3237805)
[H]e planned to ask his wife, Catie, to wash the underwear.


Guaranteed jinx, no? Chipper needs to exert his Veteran Presence™ and tell Francouer no washing allowed.
   32. John DiFool2 Posted: June 30, 2009 at 07:46 PM (#3238157)
Is it a turkey neck and two gizzards?

That's about all his trade value is anyway...
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