ESPN: Keri: The Page 2 guide to MLB free agency

And as a tour guide…Jonah Keri is more fun than the drunkodious one I once had during a nose-holding Mink Farm Museum tour.

This year’s Andre Dawson: Barry Bonds

Dawson was a superstar just past the prime of his career when his former team, the Montreal Expos, joined with the rest of baseball in a widespread case of collusion. Fed up with teams’ miserly tactics, “The Hawk” showed up for spring training before the 1987 season and told the Cubs they could have him for any price they saw fit. Chicago happily obliged, filling in $500,000 on a blank contract and adding a franchise player. Robbed of his speed and great center-field defense by 10-plus seasons of wear and tear on Olympic Stadium’s harsh turf, Dawson still had enough in the tank to lead the league in homers (49), RBIs (137) and total bases (353), earning MVP honors for a last-place team.

Bonds, 44, is more than a decade older than Dawson was in 1987 but not much further past his prime, given his shady late-30s peak. The owners deny collusion against Bonds today just as they did against all free agents more than two decades ago. Still, whether it is a concerted effort or simply a desire to stay away from bad publicity, all 30 teams have shunned the player who led his league in on-base percentage and finished sixth in OPS in 2007, the last time he played. With so many feckless designated hitters collecting paychecks, you’d think Bonds could walk into some AL’s team spring training camp, hand over a blank contract and get back on the field.

On second thought … nah! There’s no way any team would let a presumed steroids user put on a major league uniform.