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Translation: I've been getting stomped by the market. Bankruptcy to follow. Help me.
Yep. The bluster is hilariously awesome, though.
I thought he was talking about some kind of short and fat sizing option.
I'm generally sympathetic to Dykstra, but that was kind of cold, right there. So much for the solidarity of the clubhouse.
Yeah, it's hard to reconcile the quotes above with the creepy old dude in the picture.
Outside the courthouse, the hard-charging 45-year-old juggled two cellphones as he worked on a deal to launch what he said would be the first Rolls-Royce-branded private airplanes.
He said the Gulfstream G550s would sell for $60 million apiece.
Dykstra, who writes the "Nails on the Numbers" column for thestreet.com, also displayed a copy of the latest issue of The Players Club, his troubled lifestyle and advice magazine for athletes.
He said he was losing $500,000 a month on the 25,000-circulation glossy but wasn't worried.
This stuff is comic gold, my friends, comic gold.
edit: I mean, I bet $1000 the sound on both of those cell phones was "To listen to your messages press 1..."
Of that lot, I think Kruk might be the most down to earth. It's just like Animal House--Bluto went on to become the Senator.
How the hell do you lose $20 per issue per month on a magazine? Is he printing it directly on solid gold pages? Is the ink only available through processing the carcasses of endangered animals? Or does he just slip a $20 into every copy before it ships?
I can't understand how he could manage such a big loss.
And that's why his jacket lining costs seven large, and yours doesn't.
I would think there would be a pretty good market for magazines targeted to folks with troubled lifestyles. Just his old Phillies teammates would be a good place to start a subscription drive.
i believe he means by 'seven large' that the suit costs $7,000.
it's a helluva feat, i can think of some of the numbers off the top of my head. 25M/mo. of a glossy costs somewhere around $50k to print, depending on paper stock, probably more for a magazine as he described in the new yorker profile that ran a while back; then you have postage/mailing/distribution costs; plus payroll for hourly staff which if staff is around 40 people at an avg. of 40K/year salary is about $130K/mo.; then the executive salaries, which are higher. depends what he's paying his VP of advertising. add in office rent in NY or LA (don't know where the mag is headquartered) ... i could see him losing somewhere in the $250K range per month if they don't sell any decent advertising and if he's collecting a fat salary.
Williams is a pretty level-headed local baseball analyst these days. Nothing spooky about him at all.
Too much chewing tobacco and running into walls will do that to you.
"Three prawns are hardly a 'galaxy.' Lemme talk to Mr. Kwan!"
Oh, I'm aware of all this - I know a bunch of people who work in the magazine industry. The thing which is amazing is that, even including all the stuff you've listed above, you've still only managed to get the losses up to $250K per month. He's somehow managing to lose double that, despite being in a really nice position for the recruitment of advertisers. Hell, most of them will be lining up for the opportunity to buy ads in a magazine which essentially does only to millionaires (or those likely to soon be millionaires - I'm assuming that the target audience is pro-athletes).
He's fine now, but he was (understandably) a bit of a mess for a while after '93.
of course, he may be doing all this using the services of some sort of agency/design firm that would produce the thing. then he's paying out all the stuff i just layed out plus the percentage they tack on to clear a profit.
I've got another guess as to the cause.
ya, i wasn't nec. agreeing, except that we don't know a lot of what's going on. i'd be shocked if he's getting anything for the advertising he's 'selling', if any ... i don't care what claims he's making for the audience the magazine is reaching. advertisers need to see audit figures before committing $$$. i'd be curious to see the product.
any way you slice it, he's prob. losing his shirt. a creative accountant could get the losses up there, esp. if he's using that as a way to plead poverty to other creditors.
1. Rent the biggest, glossiest, most luxuriant offices you can find.
2. Get Stephen King to write all your articles for you.
3. Pay yourself, as the editor in chief, a multi-million-dollar salary.
4. Lie about how much you're losing to make the magazine look that much more opulent.
I don't know how you could use a staff of 40 on a magazine like that. They'd mostly end up playing sudoku on the computer.
You're dead-on about this. As soon as the circulation numbers aren't backed up by a firm audit, advertising rates tend to rapidly plummet towards zero.
Why don't Lenny and Pete Rose go into business together?
Could be a match made in heaven.
I'd guess that a team of 20 is needed to carry around Dykstra's ego. The rest can work on the magazine.
Even pro athletes have to poop once in a while. I'd think a big glossy magazine with pictures of really expensive junk would be a big hit in their bathrooms.
Oh yeah, Dykstra is an incredible douche for that comment about Mitch Williams. Not that the rest of the article left any doubt.
For pro athletes, that magazine is called Playboy.
39 people for the Sudoku tournament, plus one to write about it?
???
i've worked magazines/newspapers forever. edit/production/advertising/circ./admin staff easily gets to 40 for a weekly tab. monthly glossies are in the same ballpark, not even counting freelance contributors.
Regarding Dykstra, the commenters who were predicting bankruptcy in his future sound spot on to me.
where are you working tom? i'm in L.A. working for a business weekly after a stint in dailies.
i'm curious about colorado. my g.f. is nuts about it, and has some people there. she claims outside of the fancy enclaves, its pretty affordable.
“Cause sometimes, when there is no action, you gotta make your own action”
this has the ring of truth to it. newcomers to publications seriously don't get it. i'm always shocked by how little folks know about how a publication gets made, how articles are written and edited, how layouts are designed, the basics of type, planning an issue, etc. i mean, i know enough to plead ignorance about something like the law or accounting or other businesses, but outsiders come in to publications thinking 'this is EASY!' especially when it comes to design, which is where they are really unqualified to do anything. end of rant.
There are vast tracks of open land, and lots of spread out development. So yes, although everyone's definition of affordable varies. Compared to the northeast or CA, it is very affordable.
It's a great place for outdoor sports.
LOL!
Wow, maybe Cutter Dykstra will become the next Prince Fielder for the Brewers and Lenny is the next Cecil.
So is Swamp Castle available?
Or, maybe Cutter Dykstra becomes the next Tony Gwynn Jr (only paler!) and Prince Fielder becomes the next Tony Gwynn (likable, fat, lefty, face of the franchise). Then...things get complicated when comparing Lenny to Cecil.
"You're right, Darrin Fletcher, I did lose a million dollars last year. I expect to lose a million dollars this year. I expect to lose a million dollars next year. You know, Mr. Fletcher, at the rate of a million dollars a year, I'll have to close this place in.... sixty years."
Maybe it's a loss leader for his money management business?
Even pro athletes have to poop once in a while.
Leave Manny out of this.
Probably the correct word for a jowly Twizzler-chewer.
The best parts are when he drives his car to a cul-de-sac near his house to conduct all his business over the phone.
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tommybb8688 wrote:
This does not matter. Lenny is 84-0 in his picks for the year!!! Follow his picks on thestreet.com and make money it is that simple. Keep up the good work Nails!!!!!!
11/25/2008 9:28 AM EST
Invest some of it in a stairmaster and a bottle of Grecian Formula, bro. And lay off the Twizzlers.
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