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Friday, October 26, 2007
Fanhouse: Lackey: I Want to Watch Baseball, Not a Three-Hour Taco Bell Commercial
“Nearly 150 million people see a Taco Bell® commercial once a week – more than half of the U.S. population.”....So, thank you Jub Jub Buck and FOX!
I’ve always secretly suspected that Fox has been slowly trying to destroy baseball telecasts since they took over the playoff broadcasts a few years ago. Their lead broadcast team of Joe Buck and Tim McCarver is full of trite cliches and hollow statements that never offer any actual insight. Their radar gun bursts into flames. The in-game graphics beep and sing like crazy for no particularly reason. Sometimes there are robots. And yet, I put up with all of it. Until now.
Starting with last night’s “unscripted” conversation between Royce Clayton and Coco Crisp about the free taco giveaway (you can call it unscripted all you want, but why else would ROYCE CLAYTON be mic’d up?) I think Buck and McCarver have talked more about the free tacos than baseball. They replayed the conversation tonight, they celebrated in the booth when Jacoby Ellsbury stole a base, they played ANOTHER conversation between Clayton and Ellsbury with Clayton urging Ellsbury to steal a base for America, and they interviewed Taco Bell’s creepy COO. His empty eyes bored a hole into the camera and my Fox-addled soul. Not only that, Jub-Jub asked the Stepford-COO about giving away “Millions of dollars of free tacos.” Try tens of thousands of dollars of free tacos, maybe.
Repoz
Posted: October 26, 2007 at 08:32 AM | 107 comment(s)
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*Raises hand*
Fox broadcast is one more reason not to bother watching this series.
Here's a question: Which was more embarassing? The pimping of Tacos or Eric Byrnes' pregame analysis?
To me, it's not close. The Tacos. Byrnes has been unspectacular to bad. Tacos are insulting.
Well, he stated upfront that it was speculative and, as it turns out, counterfactual.
Still, I'm sick of the damn Taco Bell pimping.
mmm... 100 tacos for $100. How could you not do that?
wrong!
Since we're on the topic of free-food-for-athletic-achievement, I'll tell my story: in the early 90s, a local pizza place in Ann Arbor offered free pies if the University of Michigan's hockey team scored ten goals in a game. At one contest I attended, U of M took a 9-2 lead late in the third period, causing the crowd to chant "Pizza! Pizza!"
What happened next? Let's just say my buddy and I ate well the next day...
Apparently Buck went on Conan O'Brien's show and Conan ofered to write a $1,000 check to Buck's fave charity if he'd say "Jubjub" during the World Series. Conan also wrote the Simpsons episode in question.
Lame.
That ad makes me think of the song "Red Dragon Tattoo" by Fountains of Wayne.
I'll set it at 7,800.
Relative to other chicks in Taco Bell commercials, she's actually pretty hot.
That may just mean you don't remember eating them. Speaking of whch, I saw a young mother on the subway last week feeding a very young child (closer to six months than a year) McDonald's french fries, one by one. It actually bothered me more than if she were yelling at the kid.
Spot on.
Funny how much you remember stuff like that.
I gave up television years ago. Baseball was made for radio listening!
Nice.
Bit I think it was a coincidence. I'll bet $100 dollars that guy wouldn't touch a chalupa with his $1000 she-male escort's schlong.
Selma's hair is in the "M" for "Selma". Also, she wears those "S" earrings. Patti kind of has the round hair.
wrong!
Way to content-free snark. I'm sorry if my incorrect fact gives you the vapors, but I'm still curious about whether multiple steals over the course of the Series yields multiple tacos.
Taco Bell: Cheaper Than Food!
That really happened? I thought the Simpsons were being clever when they had a commercial of Krusty giving away Krustyburgers everytime the Americans got a medal at the '84 Olympics:
"Not to worry, Mr. K, we rigged the cards. They're all events the Communists never lose!"
"Uh-huh... Soviet boycott... U.S. unopposed in most events... how does this affect our giveaway? "
"You personally stand to lose $44 million."
"I'm going to personally spit in every 50th Krusty Burger!"
Yeah, how totally lame that Conan O'Brien would donate $1000 to charity for Joe Buck taking 5 seconds out of his life to say a goofy phrase on a television broadcast of a sport. For shame, losers!
And Conan didn't write the episode, just contributed "Jub Jub" as the name of Selma's iguana.
The Taco Bell pimping was pretty awful, especially the COO interview. But, I mean, didn't World Series broadcasts used to be sponsored by cigarette companies and ####? I'm sure Vin Scully or Ernie Harwell had to read copy during their broadcasts in the 60s. This isn't anything new - just something old blown up to exacerbating levels. Hell, the "Budweiser Opening Pitch" would've annoyed me 5 years ago, but now I just laughed.
The 1984 McDonald's Olympics fiasco really did happen.
It was pizza hut.
I was kinda hoping I could tune into the local radio broadcast for C&G;, but they were broadcasting the ESPN Radio feed. Bastards. Now I can't get my jollies by noting the disjoint between the actual thrown pitch & how Castiglione calls it.
Hell yeah it did. The best part is that when you won, they'd give you another game ticket with the hamburger you'd just one. It was a perpetual motion machine of free food. I remember some McDonald's actaully ran out of food. And if you had something like, Men's 400M, that was a whole meal for free. Women's gymnastics and swimming kept your belly full, too.
They probably were later on, but through the 40's and 50's the TV side was sponsored exclusively by Gillette, which featured commercials like this one featuring Pee Wee Reese and Roy Campanella.
The Bulls had something where if they scored 120 points then the fans got something. The players definitely knew it and would go for shots in a blowout.
The thing is that those promotions don't really affect the game for two reasons. First of all they probably only happen in blowouts. Secondly, it's only the crowd in attendance. The stolen base thing isn't a good idea, IMO. It's way more tied into a real event. Is a player going to try to steal a base just to give America the tacos? I mean, it's silly for the players to care, but you know that if the series went 5 games with no stolen bases then the players will get asked about it all the time before the 6th game.
And I know it's cliche to ask this, but what's next? Free chalupa for a HR? Free Curad bandages for a HBP? Free Zsa Zsa Gabor perfume for slapping the ball out of an opponent's glove?
If it's like '04, only the flagship station can have the Red Sox broadcast. The other stations in the network have to go with the ESPN radio broadcast.
I like those odds.
Brilliant! MBS!
Best Regards
John
A veritable cavalcade of stars! Bob Turley! Jerry Coleman! The heftily-bearded Hank Bauer! George Kell! Curt Simmons! Hank Bauer again!
Here we see that Nellie Fox was much more manly than George Kell, and somewhat more manly than Billy Pierce. And Richie Ashburn again!
Luis Aparicio, pronounced "Louis"!
Lou Boudreau, wearing a suit!
and 50 years later...
Another time Buck was on Conan asked him to wear a tie, that he cut just below the knot earlier in the show, during his next broadcast. Buck did it.
By stock in toilet paper, the soft kind.
Like all promotional games in the U.S., no purchase is required, so you could get a game card just by asking. The official rules stated that you could get one every 2 hours. So my 11 year old buddies and I would show up at MacD's every 2 hours to get our free game card. Since they were giving out food as fast as they could make it, they actually started to care about enforcing the rules.
But we did eat an insane amount of free food that summer.
Next 6 weeks, the fine print was "Limit 2 per report card."
I could ####### kill them. Now I have commercial-jingle-blue-balls.
Joe covered the gamut from the Colorado's starter refusing to throw his fastball to baserunning to defensive positioning to the Rockies' lack of a plan against Schilling.
It was good stuff. When Joe's neurons are firing he is a real asset. And last night he was bringing the heat. I thought this passage (paraphrased) was particularly insightful and amusing:
"I just don't understand what the catcher is thinking. His pitcher has a 97 mph fastball and he's throwing curveballs and sinkers and changeups. He refuses to let his pitcher throw his best pitch. And a changeup on the first pitch isn't changing off anything. It's just a mediocre fastball. And good pitchers don't throw five different pitches a game. They decide on two and maybe mix in a third just for show. It's no wonder he can't throw a strike. He can't even decide which is his best pitch. And against a good offense like the Red Sox that's begging for trouble."
If you are a casual fan you learned something. And if you are a hard-core fan you were reminded of something that's good to know. And Joe had several moments like this last night.........
I dunno, HW. I think this part sums up a lot of what annoys people about Morgan as a commentator. He says stuff that strikes one as old-fogey-ish, but with such conviction that he makes it sound like anyone who thinks otherwise is ignorant. I mean, has he ever seen Pedro? Mussina? There are plenty of good pitchers who have made themselves good by mixing up their stuff
I care less about getting a free taco than I do about "Jub Jub" becoming Joe Buck's new nickname. I'd love that.
And when Pedro was in his prime and "On" he was throwing fastballs and changeups. Koufax was fastball and curve. Guidry fastball and slider. Morgan was making a lot of sense. The kid from Colorado was mucking around with too many pitches. Combined with that motion his success to throw strikes consistently was less than 10 percent.
What is "old-fogeyish" about being correct? Or imparting some common sense?
They still have a promotion, and have for years. It's 100 points, and it's a free Big Mac. As a matter of fact, Isiah Thomas's Knicks "team" almost started a fight with the Bulls last year when their scrubs were trying to get to 100 points. Link.
well, that's my point. I think its much more difficult, in a high-offense era, for two-pitch pitchers to have consistent success. Pedro was great even on the days that he wasn't "on" because he would mix it up. To make a blanket statement like "great pitchers only use two pitches" seems a little out of date.
and FWIW, it looked to me like Jimenez wasn't getting a lot of the calls Schilling was getting last night. I think the ump had a real "respect the veteran more than the rookie" thing going.
Sigh. He said and I wrote a pitcher will decide early what of his pitches are working BEST and focus on using THEM. That to me is very common in today's game and quite sensible. I do not believe that ANY pitcher can reasonably command a slew of pitches during a game.
And there were other good points as well which I listed above. His appreciation of the Colorado defense was something that I doubt Buck/McCarver have mentioned even once this Series. I honestly do not know not listening to the TV broadcast........
They've actually mentioned it several times.
I love hearing the pitching coach talk to Apodaca. "Throw strikes!" is basically what he was telling him though I guess it sounds more technical when you say "pound the strike zone". More and more I'm convinced that they shouldn't allow visits to the mound anymore. It's a waste of time.
Why would you doubt that Buck and McCarver would talk about Colorado's defense? They have by the way. A lot.
I'd imagine any inconsistency between Ubaldo's strike zone & Schilling's would be the simple fact that (IIRC) Schilling was hitting his spots, while Ubaldo (after the first 2 innings) was all over the place, & umpires aren't likely to give the benefit of the doubt to pitchers w/ that much movement on their stuff when they miss wide consistently.
I admit, that was funny. It would be even funnier if Ubaldo didn't speak English, though I'm assuming he does.
Is this Pedro A. Martinez? I don't remember the good one routinely abandoning his curve.
Also, I think think the taco giveaway is a fraud. It was clearly defensive indiffernce. The Rockies didn't even cover 2B on the 'steal'
Do you think this guy realizes that in the 90's Tongo had more Summer Olympic gold medal winners per capita than any other country?
I admit I'm surprised.
But content to listen to Miller and Morgan.........
I was fully expecting Yorvit to translate for him. Actually, I was expecting Apodaca to speak Spanish.
I'm pretty sure it did used to be 120 and used to be Pizza Hut. That was years ago, though.
But content to listen to Miller and Morgan.........
I hear you, but after my second scotch, I get confused when I can't hear the sound for the Next Great American Band promos. I need to focus on one medium at a time.
BTW: The Benriach. Good stuff if you can find it.
It's a good plan, but I'm a channel flipper so I just keep the tv sound on. I do prefer Morgan/Miller to Buck/McCarver but I like flipping to Family Guy to catch a quick fart joke now and then or to animal planet to catch the mating practices of the pygmy hippopotamus. Hearing a guy with a dignified British accent describe the mating of animals makes me laugh for some reason.
That "gizmo" is Shooter.
I'd have thought by now FOX would have done a split screen of baseball, fart jokes, and mating practices to keep the audience's attention.
They could give Buck some Taco Bell and then replace McCarver with a horny gorilla and that should just about cover it all, no?
I believe it's the greenscreen ads behind home plate that does that. Those things need to be banned.
Only if the horny gorilla is named Jub Jub.
Hmm. British food all sounds like sex between a gorilla and Joe Buck.
XM is even slower. What I should do is listen on FM and XM Saturday to get a phaser effect or whatever pedal it was that guitarists used for that. Flanger? I know it's not wahwah.
Must...avoid...stunningly...obvious...steroids...joke...
Sorry - as RMc should apparently know, that motto is already taken.
(Though I'd rather pay for a quad with bacon, cheese, and fried egg than have any number of free Taco Bell tacos.)
I'm pretty sure you're wrong here. That may contribute to it, but I don't think it works that way alone.
Probably was a lot higher bar during the Jordan years. No team scores that high regularly. But I don't remember that well (and I've gone to a lot more games since then).
"I just don't understand what the catcher is thinking. His pitcher has a 97 mph fastball and he's throwing curveballs and sinkers and changeups. He refuses to let his pitcher throw his best pitch. And a changeup on the first pitch isn't changing off anything. It's just a mediocre fastball. And good pitchers don't throw five different pitches a game. They decide on two and maybe mix in a third just for show. It's no wonder he can't throw a strike. He can't even decide which is his best pitch. And against a good offense like the Red Sox that's begging for trouble."
If you are a casual fan you learned something. And if you are a hard-core fan you were reminded of something that's good to know. And Joe had several moments like this last night.........
I heard a stretch where Morgan was talking about something like this. I agreed that he was good, and I think he is very good when discussing pitcher/batter/baserunner strategy. He's not so good on the macro stuff, the managerial stuff.
It was also helpful just to have a description of what was going on that was so detailed, from both Miller and Morgan. It was good radio announcing.
That said, I don't buy that every pitcher is better off concentrating on two pitches in a given game. Some yes, others no. In the part I heard, Morgan was ranting about how it was dumb to start a batter off with a change, as a changeup that's not changing off of anything looks just like a mediocre fastball, and can get hit. I'd like to see from all these pitch-tracking people if it's true that first-pitch changes tend to get hammered.
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