It would have been funnier if Kendrick came out all for the trade and publicly stated his hatred for Philadelphia and Phillie fans.

Too bad it was a joke, Kobayashi Iwamura is supposed to be pretty good. I remember reading about him while I was part of a barbershop quarter in Skokie, Illinois. My buddy Redfoot, who just returned from picking beans in Guatemala, was telling me about how good Kobayashi was.

It would have been funnier if Kendrick came out all for the trade and publicly stated his hatred for Philadelphia and Phillie fans.

Absolutely.

"The Phillies are a nice organization and I appreciate them giving me a chance, but when you're talking about the Yomiuri Giants, that's a consistent winner with maybe even more tradition than the Yankees, so I can't say I wasn't hoping this would happen," said an exultant Kendrick. "I grew up in Texas as a huge Shigetoshi Hasegawa fan and I've always considered myself an otaku. In fact, I wanted to go to Washington State for college so I could see all the Mariners games on TV."

What's a second-year rookie?

I guess it would be a rookie who made his debut last year but played little enough that he's still eligible for Rookie of the Year.

But Kendrick isn't one of those. Mistake I guess.

I don't understand what's the least bit funny about this or any other practical joke like this. So a whole bunch of people repeatedly lied to Kendrick, and somehow it's his fault for believing them?

Kendrick was great for the Phillies last season but it's going to be interesting to see how he does in 2008. That k/9 is putrid and that's not exactly the type a ballpark that's forgiving to a pitcher that allows a lot of balls in play. The Phillies really should be thinking about signing Lohse.

I don't understand what's the least bit funny about this or any other practical joke like this. So a whole bunch of people repeatedly lied to Kendrick, and somehow it's his fault for believing them?


Wow, get a sense of humor.

They should do this to Milton Bradley and see if he snaps and sprays the whole room with a semi-automatic weapon.

I can see Boots Day's point, but this sort of thing is just like the dressing up of rookies in silly costumes. It's awful for the people being made fun of at the time, but it's basically a way of creating something that they can look back on and laugh at in the future. A bonding ritual. Better than physical hazing!

That k/9 is putrid and that's not exactly the type a ballpark that's forgiving to a pitcher that allows a lot of balls in play. The Phillies really should be thinking about signing Lohse.

With his low strikeout rate and good control, Kendrick might do well in Japan.

I'm actually kinda with Boots Day here. I don't see it being some kind of horror, but I don't really find this kinda thing that funny either, personally. It's not the kind of humor that makes me laugh or that I find hilarious. I guess my point in writing this, however, Alex, is that humor's subjective, no need to attack the guy, geez.

It's not really like dressing someone up in a costume at all, though. That's a lot funnier, I think. Especially if they dress Myers up as his wife and someone takes a few swings. Whee!

All I know is that I immediately thought it was HOWIE Kendrick and damn near dropped dead.

Now you can imagine how Kyle felt, Jim.

How ironic it would be if the Phillies actually did trade Kendrick in a few weeks or so.

Wow, get a sense of humor.

I think lots of things are funny. Austin Powers, for one. "The Odd Couple." Steven Wright. Andy Dick. Sarah Silverman. Bob Dylan's song "Highlands."

Then there are things other people find funny that I don't, like "Family Guy." Or like lying to someone for the purpose of humiliating them.

Then there are things other people find funny that I don't, like "Family Guy." Or like lying to someone for the purpose of humiliating them.

I'm surprised you like Sarah Silverman, then.

Or if he had killed Brett Myers in a fit of rage.

Or if he had acted like Chris Farley duped into drinking folgers crystals.

Kendrick's reaction was captured on video.

Andy Dick?

Wow, get a sense of humor.

Andy Dick might not be much now, but for a while there, on his own MTV show and on "NewsRadio," not to mention "The Ben Stiller Show," he was hilarious. He's like the Fred Lynn of comedy.

You know what would have really made this joke solid gold?

If Kendrick plunged into a depression and committed suicide before they could tell him it was all a joke.

We're gonna use this on you kevin, when Bonds and Clemens don't make the HOF on the first ballot.

This one belongs in the Practical Joke Hall of Fame. Priceless.

This is a great prank. Although it is agreed it would've been funnier if he did, indeed, rip Philly during the mock press conference.

The Mets played a joke like this on Scott Kazmir a few years ago. They still haven't admitted it's a joke though.

How ironic it would be if the Phillies actually did trade Kendrick in a few weeks or so.

Excellent question!

That question didn't even have a question mark. Your judgment is faulty, Mr. Kay.

There seems to be no weekend Dugout around. So will post here.
ESPN reporting that Gallardo might have torn knee cartilage. This might end the Brewer's season before it starts!
Linky

At a newsstand I worked at when I was in high school one of my fellows wrote up a fake memo on store letterhead to a third clerk telling him that he'd been fired for stealing magazines. The recipient of the memo went ballistic, ran into the manager's office and told him what a piece of #### store he'd always thought it was, what an ####### the manager was, etc., all of which to the manager's point of view seemed completely out of the blue. The manager freaks and starts screaming back, a rack of comic books gets kicked over, mall security shows up, and the recipient of the fake memo is ultimately dumped on the curb in the parking lot. Those were some good times.

I like practical jokes but this one was taken a little too far. Okay, so you call him and tell him he's been traded to Japan. Then he walks out of the room and bang, "Ha ha, we got you." That seems fine. But they get his agent and the press in on things, that seems a bit much. It goes to the extent where you're sort of humiliating the guy for your own amusement.

And did MLB decide they'd play a practical joke of their own--what's with that headline? Not even a question mark or quotation marks?

whoops.

At a newsstand I worked at when I was in high school one of my fellows wrote up a fake memo on store letterhead to a third clerk telling him that he'd been fired for stealing magazines. The recipient of the memo went ballistic, ran into the manager's office and told him what a piece of #### store he'd always thought it was, what an ####### the manager was, etc., all of which to the manager's point of view seemed completely out of the blue.

Just like Charlie Sheen in Major League.

Another good example of walking the line between too funny and too cruel.

In college, all the upperclassmen used to skip class on the morning of the first frosh chem test (a class all freshmen had to take) and prank the freshmen rooms. There was an unwritten rule that the cooler freshmen got the more elaborate pranks. When you think about it, this many people going to this much work to set Kendrick up is a pretty nice compliment.

My favorite practical joke in pro baseball was when Billy Beane and Walt Jockety got together and told Mark Mulder that he had been traded to the Cardinals for Danny Haren, Kiko Calero, and Daric Barton. Mulder was too smart for that. I remember his specific reaction: "No way. You've got to be joking. Why would the Cardinals trade a quality middle reliever, their best pitching prospect and their best hitting prospect for a guy who's always on the verge of breaking down, who probably can't be expected to get in 100 innings two seasons out of three? Walt Jocketty isn't that stupid. He's not that Sabean. Ha, if Jocketty made that trade, the Cardinals will end up firing him. I don't believe it."

Rifkin, that joke was already used up by #26.

#27 was the only thing in this thread to make me laugh.

I also assumed the headline referred to Howie, and even though I'm not an Angels fan in the slightest, my heart picked up the pace in anticipation of reading about a major story. Too bad.

#37 -- thanks for sharing.

My first reaction to this was "THEY TRADED (HOWIE) KENDRICK?!?!?" and then it was "Japan? What the?". And then I envisioned this prank being pulled on Milton Bradley and thought of about 9 different hilarious scenarios that slowed my heartbeat back down. I picture Milton's reaction being like Kanye in that SNL skit: "OH HEEEELL NAH!". Only Milton would stab Hank Blalock or something afterwards before someone let him in on the joke.

I don't tease. I don't prank. I really don't enjoy receiving them. Of course, someone must have watched Punked </shudder>

This is not funny in any way.

With a straight face, the assistant general manager told his gullible pitcher that he’d been dealt to the Yomiuri Giants of the Japanese Central League for a player named “Kobayashi Iwamura.”

Such a naive, gullible young lad that he believes it when the Asst. GM tells him he has been traded.

I also don't think this is funny at all, as it goes well beyond the realm of silly practical jokes and into being just plain cruel and designed to get someone really upset.

Kendrick thought it was funny himself: everyone can go shove their sanctimony.

I'm sure Pauly Shore thought his movies were funny too, but that doesn't mean I have to.

Agree with #43. This was an extreme quality practical joke, and yeah, you feel stupid when you're on the receiving end of one, but if you go ballistic about it, you needed the two bottles of Lighten Up anyway.

What makes it a stupid joke is that a piece of #### like Myers started it. That changes the context completely. It goes from being a potentially funny joke taken too far to an elaborate piece of bullying from a piece of garbage. If you think it was funny then you are in the company of a pig. What the world needs is more sanctimony and less laissez faire from moral cretins.

I don't understand what's the least bit funny about this or any other practical joke like this. So a whole bunch of people repeatedly lied to Kendrick, and somehow it's his fault for believing them?

I would have bet Boots Day would have been offended by this. This is baseball tradition, but then again being offended is an aspirational badge of honor in our society today.

**Edit: Lightning strikes. Gaelan pisses his pants over the joke! But he is not laughing, he is seething with rage. Grow up people.

This is baseball tradition, but then again being offended is an aspirational badge of honor in our society today.

Ain't that the truth. Did you see that guy here the other day who got all offended because someone suggested cops were less than superhuman?

No, but I'm glad I missed it.

Pitchers and catchers reported, we can move on to the season. I'm convinced the annual off-season PED mania is actually a manifestation of America's growing love-obsession with baseball, OJ style. That MLB TV channel can't launch fast enough.

You know what would have really made this joke solid gold?

If Kendrick plunged into a depression and committed suicide before they could tell him it was all a joke.

kevin, this is the hardest part of the job but I need to tell you that you have been traded to the Air Force.

What makes it a stupid joke is that a piece of #### like Myers started it. That changes the context completely. It goes from being a potentially funny joke taken too far to an elaborate piece of bullying from a piece of garbage. If you think it was funny then you are in the company of a pig. What the world needs is more sanctimony and less laissez faire from moral cretins.

Oh please. I think Myers is a jerk too for his wife-beating, but that doesn't mean that everything he does reflects his jerkiness. Obviously lots of other people thought it was a good joke too.

If Kyle Kendrick is an arrogant ashhole that needs to be knocked down two pegs, this is hilarious.

If he is not...this is not funny. And as dumb as Brett Myers must be for orchestrating this and thinking it would be some good fun, I think even less of the participants in a position of authority, such as AsstGM Amaro, manager Manuel, and Kendrick's agent. In my opinion, each of those three could be fired, legitimately, for their participation.

It might be funny if this kind of thing were pulled off against an established player. But pulling this prank against a player with this level of experience and skill level is both easy and cruel.

I'm sure Pauly Shore thought his movies were funny too, but that doesn't mean I have to.

You're outrageous and TERRIBLE at making analogies. He was the one being made fun of, you are "protecting" him by being offended for him. Except he thinks you're an idiot because he thought it was funny. If people don't think it's funny OK, funny is subjective, but any declaration of "wrong" is ridiculous.

I think people who think that anyone who doesn't have their exact sense of humor is "thin-skinned" or "needs to whiten up" are fricking hilarious.

If you don't see the humor in that, lighten up #############!

How ironic it would be if the Phillies actually did trade Kendrick in a few weeks or so.

I might be imagining this, but I'm pretty sure there's a video floating around of LaSorda calling John Wetteland and...someone else into his office to tell them they've been traded to the Expos. Wetteland flips out, a la Ricky Vaughn in Major League, only for LaSorda to tell him, of course, it was just a prank.

So, punchline, where does Wetteland end up pitching a couple of seasons later? The Expos, of course.

Good lord this offseason is driving us all insane.

It was a short drive for most of us.

What the world needs is more sanctimony and less laissez faire from moral cretins.

Well the moral cretins are definitely out in force with the sanctimony tonight! I agree, if you're going to be a moral cretin, stepping up with the sanctimony and letting everyone know who you are, is infinitely preferable to remaining silent and prolonging doubt.

(I just hope the world appreciates their deprecation of the entirely harmless fun of other people... being the Moral Majority is hard work these days.)

I apologize to Boots for questioning his sense of humor above. I interpreted his comment as "no one should think this is funny", rather than "this didn't make me laugh."

So hey, if you didn't think its funny, that's fine. I honestly didn't think it was all that funny. But the sanctimony is irritating.

No problem, Alex.

But this:

You're outrageous and TERRIBLE at making analogies. He was the one being made fun of, you are "protecting" him by being offended for him. Except he thinks you're an idiot because he thought it was funny. If people don't think it's funny OK, funny is subjective, but any declaration of "wrong" is ridiculous.

...is just wacky. When did I ever say I was offended, or that this was wrong? I said it wasn't funny.

EDIT: er, never mind.

im sorry bernal but the air force just cant take kevin in that trade, the navy is just gonna have to keep him

I think people who think that anyone who doesn't have their exact sense of humor is "thin-skinned" or "needs to whiten up" are fricking hilarious.

One track mind much?

Well the moral cretins are definitely out in force with the sanctimony tonight! I agree, if you're going to be a moral cretin, stepping up with the sanctimony and letting everyone know who you are, is infinitely preferable to remaining silent and prolonging doubt.

(I just hope the world appreciates their deprecation of the entirely harmless fun of other people... being the Moral Majority is hard work these days.)

Your sanctimony over other people's sanctimony sickens me.

The greatest practical joke I ever saw was perpetrated by Takaaki Ishibashi, better known in the States as "Tanaka" from Major League 2 and 3. Ishibashi is part of a comedy duo called "Tunnels", and on one of their shows they decided to prank Akira Nishikino, a Japanese singer and friend of theirs, on his birthday.

The setting was a hot springs hotel in the middle of winter. First, everyone involved (a number of Japanese comedians and celebrities of various fame) gathered at the hotel for a dinner/drinking/birthday party. First, they switched Nishikino's cell phone with an exact duplicate, down to the Hello Kitty strap. Then, they dumped the duplicate into one of the hot nabe-stew pots on the table. Of course, he was all upset about that. Then they had Ishibashi's partner, Noritake, just light into the young guy who dropped the cell phone into nabe. Just chewed the guy's ass out, shoved him to the ground, kicked him in the ass a couple times, and then thew him out of the party hall.

So now Nishikino's feeling a bit ill-at-ease, thinking his momentary irritation has gotten this young guy in all this trouble. So they bring out a birthday cake...and drop it. So, so far this is your typical "worst birthday party ever/uncomfortable situation" prank. But this is when they go for the coup de grace. They go up to the hotel baths. Unbeknownest to Nishikino, his bath is rigged to empty out into a water slide that goes down and out of the hotel, at the end of which are giant bowling pins. On the cue of Ishibashi saying, "You know, there are a lot bears around these parts," his bath empties out, and he goes sliding bare-assed down the slide and into the pins, where a sports announcer is waiting with a mike to shout out, "Nice strike!" when he hits the pins.

It was freakin' awesome. Ashton Kutcher has nothing on Japanese pranksters.

A year later, Ishibashi got Nishikino in another great joke. He got him to appear in a supposed celebrity/athlete track and field meet. For this they even got Carl Lewis to participate. They had the long jump track set up with a collapsible landing strip. Lewis when first, and because he's Carl Lewis, he jumped over the trap. Nishikino, while in good shape, is no Carl Lewis, so when he jumped, he landed right into the collapsible strip and goes crashing down. I laughed so hard, I thought I pulled an abdominal.

That makes this one pale by comparison. Just getting a bunch of people to tell extremely consistent lies is nothing compared to how awesome it would have been if they had filmed Kyle Kendrick falling through the floor into a water slide leading to giant bowling pins.

God, this thread devolved into insults and name-calling? Christ, guys, pitchers and catchers have reported. Try to find something real to fight about. Like Chien-Ming Wang or something.

Kendrick thought it was funny himself: everyone can go shove their sanctimony.

Exactly what else was he going to say? He can't exactly tell the guys who pulled the prank that they were a bunch of jerks, considering that one of them is the assistant GM?

I have no idea what Kendrick really thought, but I based on his position in the organization, this is the only comment he can make.

Exactly what else was he going to say? He can't exactly tell the guys who pulled the prank that they were a bunch of jerks, considering that one of them is the assistant GM?

I have no idea what Kendrick really thought, but I based on his position in the organization, this is the only comment he can make.

Which is why this is not only not a funny joke but a shameful joke. So, yes I'm judging you people for laughing. You're on the side of wifebeaters and ######## who think its funny to abuse their power to make someone lower them feel bad for a little while. Its bullying behaviour and its not funny. It strikes right at all of Kendrick's legitimate fears and insecurities all to demonstrate who's the boss. Do you think Kendrick will think its funny when he gets called into the office and sent down to AAA at mid-season to work on some things? Do you think he'll note the irony on his way to the bus and chuckle to himself.

The other prank is funny. Why? Because it was done by his friend in the name of friendship. Not being able to discern context is a critical difference between an ignorant buffoon and a civilized person, or if you prefer, between a child and an adult.

I think what made the joke even funnier is that all four of Kendrick's grandparents spent WWII in Japanese forced labor camps building railroad bridges in Indo-China, when not being tortured.