Let this be a lesson to younger Primates, don't take my approach to school or you'll windup in a soul killing job that gives you enough money to live on but not much else.

And the world will be glutted with bios of Tacks Lattimer.

Yes, that calling me fatso is brilliant.

You never go wrong with the classics.

He's Union all the way, I guess.

You've spent about 2 years insulting us, and now you're all sensitive? Gimme a break, Chris. Kevin is right that whatever issues you have w/Base you should take up w/him.

I would whip your ass with cooking.

I would whip your ass with cooking.

That sounds like it would cost $300 an hour from the backpages of the Austin Chronicle.

BD, this cooking is awful, what is this, whipped ass?

I don't think JC cares too much what people call him.

I've got 5 children and a bro-in-law who writes jokes for a living. I'm used to it.

I would whip your ass with cooking.

Nice pun, but that's a challenge I'd take.

all you have to do to quiet down Dial is remind him that he went to the second best UT.

Or call him fat.

Or call him fat.

That seems to make him vociferous (not that I'm saying he shouldn't be; ad hominems are bad enough, when they reach a personal level, that's actually one time I'll deem things over the line.) If you mention UT, he has no comeback. Because it's incontrovertible.

all you have to do to quiet down Dial is remind him that he went to the second best UT.

Or call him fat.

I've been trying to shut him up for more than 2 years, and now you guys tell me?

What's a non-personal ad hominem, Jeff?

And the world will be glutted with bios of Tacks Lattimer.

I pretty much used all of my muse for a while on that one. I'll write something again, but it will be a while. I am impressed by the guys who can blog or write on a steady basis.

I need to come up with some potboiler with mass appeal to buy myself time to do other stuff.

Jeff,
Texas has done everything they can to copy the original. Keep trying.

Apparently the goal is to lower discourse to such a point that Dial will not follow.

Those SEC guys are all the same.

I would whip your ass with cooking.

That one, I might get scared about. I'm a one dish wonder. I'd have to engage a serious training program.

If you can get me a Masters in Econ real cheap, on the weekends so I can actually make money while going to school, and actually teach me the subject, I'll vote for you.

What do you consider cheap? I can handle the other criteria, but we aren't certified yet.

all you have to do to quiet down Dial is remind him that he went to the second best UT.

Or call him fat.

I've got no desire to call the man fat. I'll joke about Peyton's Place. I'm allowed, I went to an SEC school. I've got no desire to insult the man in any way whatsoever.

Tonight it looks like he wants a fight. And since I've pretty much wasted the day, I'm trying to calm his ass down. But if he's feeling that squirrly, he should know that eventually he'll get what he wants from me. And I'm not sure that is what he's really after.

I mean if you guys don't want the kinder, gentler backlasher, I can give you site villian, and I do that role really well.

What's a non-personal ad hominem, Jeff?

If I said something like (completely made up), in the context of a thread on base stealing where you posted, "Don't listen to JC when he posts about base-stealing. His posts about base-stealing are always wrong and poorly researched" and failed to address the actual points brought up in it.

That's an ad hominem by the definition. The argument isn't attacked, the arguer is. I wouldn't call that "personal", though.

i treied to ask Dial to cool it and stick to the subject but, alas, it doesn't seem to be working.

Let's bring Werr and Szym in here to see what they think, and deconstruct this last Dial post, by counting the unsolicited insults and taunts (all cut and pastes):

1)And then I asked you why you thought you could intelligently surmise anything.

2)Here's a free lesson in maturity

3)kevina

4)He acts about 8

5)and gets other 8-yo to LOL (to quote JC)

6)He gets you to call simplistic remarks like "fatsO' like I'm taking a pounding

7)BL describes that type of insult as "fulkking lethal".

8)Hey, you guys can think that, but it's not very clever in my book.

9)And it doesn't hurt my feelings one bit because unlike you guys (evidently, from your concern over my feelings about Base) I don't generate my self-esteem from someone calling me childish names over the internet.

10) BL seems to worry about it the most,

11) then kevin,

12) You guys don't seem to know what emotional toughness is,

13) You should be ashamed of yourselves, but I understand why you aren't - you're you.

Chris, all I want to talk about is the Blue Jays and Keith Law. That is what I came there to talk about. I don't want to talk about Rob Base. i don't want to talk about Barry Bonds. I don't want to talk about how Backlasher is so mean to you. I don't want to talk about you batting average, or how fat you are, or how you wear glasses. You brought those things up.

Will you let me just talk, without trying to entice me into a flame war with you? Please? Can you do that just this once?

Those SEC guys are all the same.

All right, Mexican food at fifty peppers.

I need to come up with some potboiler with mass appeal to buy myself time to do other stuff.

Dude, The DaVanon Code.

If I said something like (completely made up), in the context of a thread on base stealing where you posted, "Don't listen to JC when he posts about base-stealing. His posts about base-stealing are always wrong and poorly researched" and failed to address the actual points brought up in it.

That's an ad hominem by the definition. The argument isn't attacked, the arguer is. I wouldn't call that "personal", though.

I was actually trying to set you up for a joke, but I guess you're in serious mode tonight, or it wasn't apparent.

I was actually trying to set you up for a joke, but I guess you're in serious mode tonight, or it wasn't apparent.

Oh. I'm not in a serious mood, I just didn't get that that's what you were doing. And on further reflection, I still don't see where I was supposed to go.

Remember, this thread has established I am a moron.

Or call him fat.

Inside I smirk when I get called fat. I know how big I am, and I know how much smaller I am than ALOT of these posters, because I have met a lot of them. So when you call me fat (or laugh along with someone who does), all the ones that know I am not as big as they are, likely think less of the posters that would go teh "you're fat" route.

I mean, 5'11" 218#. Yes, I'm huge. I wash myself with a rag on a stick.

I was actually trying to set you up for a joke, but I guess you're in serious mode tonight, or it wasn't apparent.

Its the calculus. Its got Jeff on edge.

All right, Mexican food at fifty peppers.

Between Austin and Knoxville? Are you ####### joking?

Inside I smirk when I get called fat. I know how big I am, and I know how much smaller I am than ALOT of these posters, because I have met a lot of them. So when you call me fat (or laugh along with someone who does), all the ones that know I am not as big as they are, likely think less of the posters that would go teh "you're fat" route.

IOW, who'll save the children from the fat jokes?

I wash myself with a rag on a stick.

Ok now that was pretty funny.

Dude, The DaVanon Code.

I thught of something like that right after I posted. "Casey At The Bat" is actually an encoded message from our overlords. And the truth behind Mike Paxton's baseball card will be revealed.

Between Austin and Knoxville? Are you ####### joking?

That challenge is for Buckeye Boy.

and deconstruct this last Dial post, by counting the unsolicited insults and taunts

Sure, kevin, ignore your posts that asked for the response.

How is 6) a taunt or an insult? It's a statement of fact. So is 7). And 8)?

Deconstruction isn't your strong suit, kevin.

IOW, who'll save the children from the fat jokes?

Plus, JC, if you guys stick with that you'll likely stay off the other slurs.

I mean, 5'11" 218#. Yes, I'm huge. I wash myself with a rag on a stick.

I think that tonight, I have read my favorite lines ever by Szymborski (#5 in the Phillies lineup thread) and Dial. Impressive.

Wewll, I cheated - that's a Bart Simpson line - as kevin , in what he considers to be non-insulting (because that's the only way I could have written those "unsolicited" insults) way, said earlier I never said anything original.

How is 6) a taunt or an insult?

You're ascribing to me something I have never done.

Deconstruction isn't your strong suit, kevin.

OK. I agree with you. Deconstruction isn't my strong suit.

Now can we get back to talking about what the thread is about, instead of making it about you, or starting a flame war because Base has said some cutting things to you?

That challenge is for Buckeye Boy.

Okay. Because I guarantee that a Special Forces sniper could take aim from my porch and put a bullet in the front door of a Mexican restaurant that would be, at the least, the second-best Mexican place in Knoxville. I leave room for an outlier in Knoxville, and of the 3 places he could hit, I'd rank them somewhere in the 50s for Austin.

No, I just know that you're incapable or originality, so I just connected the dots.

You aren't using your head for anything there. You're just being,ell, stupid.

And, since you are using your head as a suppository, as opposed to a hatrack

The general tone on this site needs improvement.

Only one of those comments is constructive.

Okay. Because I guarantee that a Special Forces sniper could take aim from my porch and put a bullet in the front door of a Mexican restaurant that would be, at the least, the second-best Mexican place in Knoxville. I leave room for an outlier in Knoxville, and of the 3 places he could hit, I'd rank them somewhere in the 50s for Austin.

No doubt you would take Auburn too. We had two Mexican resteraunts and one was the friggin Taco Bell.

But Buckeye boy is talking smack about the premier affiliation of schools in America. He wants it to be cookoff. All I can cook is Mexican, so I think I get the honors on the duel.

"Just because Rob Base has been pounding you like a veal scallopini over in the Mets blog"

"You're ascribing to me something I have never done."

Uh, sure, kev...

But Buckeye boy is talking smack about the premier affiliation of schools in America.


I wasn't talking smack about the GLCA, I was making fun of you hillbillies and your trade schools down yonder.

Chris,

Base is over in the mgl thread. I think he wants to play more than I do. I'll just watch this one.

You were suggesting that I approved of the fat jokes, Dial. I never made any metion of those.

The pounding I was referring to was the hot dogs and apple pie concession stand line, which is pretty damned funny, no matter how you slice it. You have to admit that.

No doubt you would take Auburn too.

If you relax the standards to just "any city", then Austin would take every town shy of San Antonio and possibly some place(s) in California. I've never been there, so I won't argue against them, but there is no doubt in my mind that Austin is top 5.

Which one is the MGL thread?

I wasn't talking smack about the GLCA, I was making fun of you hillbillies and your trade schools down yonder.

I know Wittenberg props up that affiliation, but its not good enough to overcome some of those lesser schools on Beall Avenue.

I dunno. Alberquerque, Tuscon, El Paso, Chicago, Homestead FL, Corpus might have something to say about that.

The Phillies/Daily News/Kram thread, BHW.

Dial, Base and mgl all in the same thread. Could get pretty entertaining. Base has already started with the fat jokes.

Which one is the MGL thread?

Chuckles

I know Wittenberg props up that affiliation, but its not good enough to overcome some of those lesser schools on Beall Avenue.

Wittenberg is not in the GCLA.

Which one is the MGL thread?

The one about the Philly lineup. I don't care if Dial doesn't mind Base's taunts, but he needs to grow up. Of course, I'm saying that here. I should say that there, but I'm turning in. Enough soap operas today for me already.

Wittenberg is not in the GCLA.

Then you better start recruiting their ass.

The Loungification of potential flame threads worked.

He meaning Base, not Dial.

Alberquerque, Tuscon, El Paso, Chicago, Homestead FL, Corpus

I've been to three of those cities. El Paso has an argument. Corpus and Alberquerque do not. Homestead, I just can't imagine how they have better Mexican. Mexican, not Latin. And Chicago? Better than Austin? Not a chance.

There are a bunch of Mexicans in and around Homestead.

Enough soap operas today for me already.

You haven't even got a taste of All My Backlashers yet. Don't wimp out.

The Loungification of potential flame threads worked.

*drums fingers together* Excellent.

*drums fingers together* Excellent.

Guys. acklasherbay got an OSTay on that subject.

{/if}

All My Backlashers

General VORPital.
ERAs of our Lives.
Guiding Wright.

The Loungification of potential flame threads worked.

MBS!

Guys. acklasherbay got an OSTay on that subject.

effKJay oesntday careday.

effKJay oesntday careday.

Ok

Mr. {/if}breaker

I've been to three of those cities. El Paso has an argument. Corpus and Alberquerque do not. Homestead, I just can't imagine how they have better Mexican. Mexican, not Latin. And Chicago? Better than Austin? Not a chance.

Do you know much about Chicago?

Chicago is the city of the dueling sausages. There are sausages of every flavor, color and nationality. And this benefits everyone involved.

<>

Inside I smirk when I get called fat. I know how big I am, and I know how much smaller I am than ALOT of these posters, because I have met a lot of them. So when you call me fat (or laugh along with someone who does), all the ones that know I am not as big as they are, likely think less of the posters that would go teh "you're fat" route.

If I recite my stunningly gorgeous bodily proportions, is BL going to call me out SAT-style?

You're missing the obvious point that, now that the Jays are spending more, Law has chosen to leave.

Why now? The team is doing well, the payroll has been expanded, things are looking up. If if was about the money, couldn't he interview with another team for a position that paid a little more? I doubt ESPN is going to pay him very well. They just dumped Sickels and forced the rest of the writers, Gammons included, to earn their keep in Insider.

I surmise that he thought there wasn't a very promising future for him in baseball. ESPN is never going to remotely approach the salary of a baseball GM. He could write there 100 years and he isn't going to make 250K a year.

And if he just wants to be a writer, then why did he take the job in the first place? That's not a stepping stone to ESPN. And he's kind of young to be switching careers. Being 32 is a baby. He also could have seen what happened to DePo and wants none of it. I wouldn't blame him for that.


Kind of young to be switching careers ? Dude - I'm a 23 - I've done something for two years, and might well get another job before going to business school and then doing something different after that. This isn't the 50's - people switch career tracks all the time, because the priorities involve change. Hell, maybe he got married and his wife wants to be in the US - maybe there is some family reason - maybe the money just isn't good enough in Toronto. It seems absurd to evaluate his motives as being one of "failure", especially because the Jays are doing well (as you pointed out). The only way this works is if your definiton of failure is not becoming a major league GM - which is ridiculous.

Aha - I see the discussion has taken a "different" turn in the meantime.

If I recite my stunningly gorgeous bodily proportions, is BL going to call me out SAT-style?

Nah, I'll just take you to dinner.

If if was about the money, couldn't he interview with another team for a position that paid a little more? I doubt ESPN is going to pay him very well. They just dumped Sickels and forced the rest of the writers, Gammons included, to earn their keep in Insider.

The first sentence is just funny. "Hmm, all of the companies in my industry pay very little for positions like mine (only the top execs make real money). I'm not happy with how much I make. Eureka! I'll just interview with another team for a position that pays more!"

The last sentence doesn't really make sense either. It's just as easy to interpret the move to Insider as, "ESPN finds their columnists so compelling that they've decided to charge people to read them, that demonstrates much more financial value than before."

I'm not saying that that's the case; I really have no idea what ESPN is thinking or how their website is doing. I'm just saying it takes somebody with a really negative bias to interpret that the move to Insider translates to less pay for the columnists. Hell, everybody else criticizes Neyer, etc. for selling out.

Backup. Keith Law sued Chris Dial? WTF? I hate never being on the inside.


Well Keith's just LAYING DOWN THE LAW!!! Isn't he?

Ok I'll leave the puns to Brattain from now on.

The fact that he manifests those skills in insults is not necessarily a virtue. So its not like, "I don't care if he TOSes, I just like to watch him post." but a person should know his limitations. I would not be scared to get in a war with Base, but I'd respect his ability. I would not be scared to get in a war with mgl on analysis, but I respect his ability. I would not be scared to get into a war of logic with JC, but I respect his ability. I would not be scared to challenge Srul on the law, but I know his ability. I would not be scared to go after Nieporent in IP, but I've never seen him wrong. Mug-Geography; Burley-Jays; Field-History, Andy-sociology etc. etc.


You knwo what I would be afraid of?

Challenging Kevin in Leg-presses.

I don't want to hurt myself.

Chicago is the city of the dueling sausages. There are sausages of every flavor, color and nationality. And this benefits everyone involved.

Paging Meatwad, Paging Meatwad, innuendo on page 3 requiring an inappropriate comment consult, Paging Meatwad.

I need to come up with some potboiler with mass appeal to buy myself time to do other stuff.


I remember the ones BL came up with for the asian baseball blog I tried up coming up with but just sort of didnt' pick up momentum:

Blog Fu
Shaolin Slider


Some of them were really bad.

Deconstruction isn't your strong suit, kevin.

What is?

LEG PRESSES, duh

Blog Fu
Shaolin Slider


Some of them were really bad.

I assume that includes those.

I assume that includes those.

Oh come on, A Slow Blog to China was good.

This is random, but since the death of the Dugout, I don't know where to post this.

Is it just me, or have there been a ridiculous amount of "5+ straight games with a homer" streaks this year?

Is it just me, or have there been a ridiculous amount of "5+ straight games with a homer" streaks this year?

Yes.

Oh come on, A Slow Blog to China was good.

I dont' get the reference actually.

Oh come on, A Slow Blog to China was good.

I dont' get the reference actually.

As in "Slow Boat to China." And that is pretty good. But couldn't it have something to do with ninjas? Because ninjas are totally cool, and by totally cool, I mean totally sweet... aw never mind.

As in "Slow Boat to China." And that is pretty good. But couldn't it have something to do with ninjas?

Ninjas aren't typically Chinese, are they?

Holy crap guys. Get a life.

Ninjas aren't typically Chinese, are they?

Most ninjas I've met are 9 year old caucasian americans.

Holy crap guys. Get a life.

Wow. One reference to Real Ultimate POWER!!!! and I get that? Tough crowd.

And yes, ninjas are usually Japanese, but I believe the blog was to be about Asian baseball, not Chinese baseball specifically. Not that I am helping at all.

Most ninjas I've met are 9 year old caucasian americans.

Big fan of 3 Ninjas, are you?

Ninja's play baseball?

I do remember in Kill bill that Japanese Swordmaker dude was a baseball fan.

Most ninjas I've met are 9 year old caucasian americans.


This is more the type of nine-year-old ninjas we're talking about.

I do remember in Kill bill that Japanese Swordmaker dude was a baseball fan.

And Lucy Liu couldn't pronounce her own name.

How about this for a blog name:

Asians trying baseball
Let's misappropriation!
This one's for haiku

(Yes the first line is six syllables.)

You haven't even got a taste of All My Backlashers yet. Don't wimp out.

Hey, I had to get up early today.

The Loungification of potential flame threads worked.

Now you have time to work on the flamification of the Lounge.

But if you go to Harvard, with those connections, that's like a license to print money.

Literally

Not only does he have an MBA from CMU

But does he have a MBS from BTF?

Best Regards

John

Going way back before the carnage/flammage started to talk about the actual subject matter:

I had posted in #146:

BTW: I talked to a friend of mine earlier this year, who has a job with a major league team, and he confirmed the point that the "unnamed" executive made.

and both The Artist and BL asked me to clarify the reference.

I was referring to this comment by The Artist in #142:

BP's "conversation with an executive" in this year's book pointed out what the salaries are

Unless you are the GM or one of the other top-ranking front office executives, you're getting paid very little money for very long days and very little "real" responsibility.

-- MWE

Yes, that calling me fatso is brilliant.

David Wells posts here? Heck David Wells is so fat....

10. When he uses a Q-Tip it ends up convered in ambergris.

9. He gets up from his chair and enters the Guinness Book of World Records under 'Powerlifting: Squats.'

8. Any kid who falls for his 'pull my finger' gag is automatically tried as an adult.

7. Every time he lies on the beach Greenpeace volunteers try to drag him back into the water.

6. Krisy Kreme donuts opened a franchise in his kitchen.

5. His toilet paper roll can also be used at the New York Times for printing off the weekend edition.

4. The only reason people are drawn to him is because of the effects of gravity.

3. People ask him what he did between his baseball career and his acting job in "Return of the Jedi."

2. He gives kids an autograph and they reply "Thanks Mr. Forster."

1. He was facing the Florida Keys when he farted and it collided with a cold air mass from the Rocky Mountains and spawned an outbreak of tornados over the midwest.

Best Regards

John

Ya Momma's got a pegleg wit a kickstand!

But does he have a MBS from BTF?

Actually, in his post over the weekend, he was trying for one.

Ya Momma's got a pegleg wit a kickstand!

Oh, yeah? Yo momma's got a glass eye with a fish in it.

Unless you are the GM or one of the other top-ranking front office executives, you're getting paid very little money for very long days and very little "real" responsibility.

That makes fits just about everything I've ever read/heard. I'd also think Law's background isn't ideal for moving up to the big chair. Somewhere above, Kevin said that Law's job with the Jays wasn't a stepping stone to ESPN. It would appear that that isn't the case. Think about all the ex-GM and manager types that move to ESPN-TV without any previous such experience. I'd say that a small time baseball writer who gets a few years of actual MLB work experience would find it pretty easy to move up in the writing world. If we're speculating, I'd say that this could have been Law's plan all along. But, like everyone else, there are so many possible reasons for making a job move and we have so little information that it is silly to speculate.

Oh, yeah? Yo momma's got a glass eye with a fish in it.

What a timeless classic of a track!

Yo momma's got a afro wit a chinstrap!

Think about all the ex-GM and manager types that move to ESPN-TV without any previous such experience.

That's different, bunyon. Guys like Phillips are going on TV because of their recognition factor. Very few fans know who Law is and they aren't hiring him to be on TV anyway.

No, they're hiring him to write, which is, obviously, a lower profile gig. However, his mini-bio is almost certainly going to include a phrase along the lines "former executive with the Blue Jays". Readers may not know who he is, but he can write and back up his views with big league experience which will have a cache with a lot of readers.

My main point was that you said the Jays job wasn't a stepping stone to the ESPN job. Given that the latter followed the former, in Law's case it was a stepping stone. Just because you (or others) didn't foresee it doesn't mean it wasn't important.

I would think his previous gig with BPro would be a much more important stepping stone than the Blue Jays job, as it was a writing job.

Kevin, do you really not see how a few years spent in a MLB front office could be of enormous benefit in writing about MLB, especially the management end of things?

I would think his previous gig with BPro would be a much more important stepping stone than the Blue Jays job, as it was a writing job.

Many publications see experience in the field as a major positive for the candidates for writing/reporting jobs. Many of them prefer to take someone with knowledge of the field who shows some writing ability but needs some work in that area rather than an experienced writer/reporter with less direct experience in the field that he/she will be assigned to write about.

Put another way: A fair number of candidates for a job such as this one probably have writing experience that is at least somewhat similar to what Law has, but far fewer can say that they also worked in an MLB front office.