I laughed, but that's the kind of joke you only tell around your friends, who know you're not anti-Semitic.

What? How exactly is that a joke? I thought it was going to be some kind of priest/rabbi joke. Instead its just an ####### comment.

"99% of the country is not anti-semitic!"

---DMN

"OK--we'll give some land to the niggers and the spics; but we DON'T want the Irish"

This thread is silly, so let's just follow jmac66's lead and post our favourite "Blazing Saddles" quotes.

"Qualifications?"
"Stampeding cattle."
"That's not much of a crime."
"Through the Vatican?"
"Kinky! Sign here!"

"What in the wide, wide world of sports is a-goin' on here?"

"Mongo only pawn in game of life."

"You've got to remember that these are just simple farmers. These are people of the land. The common clay of the new West. You know... morons."

"Can't you see that's the last act of a desperate man?"

-- "We don't care if it's the first act of 'Henry V,' we're leaving!"

"You'd do it for Randolph Scott."

(Dramatic pause)

-- "Randolph Scott!"

(Heavenly chorus) "Ran--dolph Scott!"

Richard Pryor was supposed to star in Blazing Saddles and helped write the script. That would have been a different movie, I think. Gene Wilder was a last minute replacement, too. Everything worked out perfectly, of course. Blazing Saddles is damn near perfect.

Harriet Johnson: Isn't anybody going to help that poor man?

Dr. Sam Johnson: Hush, Harriet! That's a sure way to get him killed!

Gene Wilder in a Mel Brooks film in the late '60s/early '70s = pretty much the funniest, most satisfying thing you could hope for. I only wish there was more.

I have The Adventures of Sherlock Holmes' Smarter Brother here on DVD, but my girlfriend and I are such fans of the Wilder/Brooks material that we're afraid to watch for fear of major disappointment. Any recommendations?

P.S. Ronan Tynan's a moron.

"Sorry, wrong person.....What's the matter with you, can't you see that man is a ni?"

"We've got to protect our phony baloney jobs, gentlemen!"

"He said the sheriff is near!"

-My all-time favorite movie

What? How exactly is that a joke? I thought it was going to be some kind of priest/rabbi joke. Instead its just an ####### comment.

If you're joking around with your friends, who know you're not anti-Semetic, then it's ironic, and therin lies the humor. If you're doing it around a stranger, then you're a moron and deserve to be called anti-Semetic.

If you're joking around with your friends, who know you're not anti-Semetic, then it's ironic, and therin lies the humor. If you're doing it around a stranger, then you're a moron and deserve to be called anti-Semetic.

The guys I work with are either Jewish or Italian so the Jewish jokes and the jokes about Italians and Catholics are frequent. I'm just a white dude from California so I get the gay jokes and the Commie jokes and the occasional tree-hugger jokes thrown at me. We actually get along pretty well.

I'm just a white dude from California so I get the gay jokes and the Commie jokes and the occasional tree-hugger jokes thrown at me. We actually get along pretty well.

They can combine some and make a dendrophilia joke.

They can combine some and make a dendrophilia joke.

I said they were Jewish and Italian, I didn't say they were smart!

Ba-zing!

<heads to the corner for a time out>

They can combine some and make a dendrophilia joke.

Is that a joke against dentists? Are you an anti-dentite?

This is the worst thing that has ever happened to the Jews.

My favorite Blazing Saddles story -

Mel Brooks was on the old Costas NBC late night show about 20 years ago, and he was talking about the scene where the sheriff and Lili get together. In the movie, the lights go out, and you hear an unzipping sound - after which she says, "It's true, it's true, it's true." Brooks said that, in order to appease the MPAA, he had to cut the next line, which was the sheriff saying: "You're sucking on my arm."

Is that a joke against dentists? Are you an anti-dentite?

It's a callback to the Mike Piazza thread in 2002. Dendrophilia is a sexual attraction to trees.

Dendrophilia is a sexual attraction to trees.

Size does matter, I guess.

It's a callback to the Mike Piazza thread in 2002. Dendrophilia is a sexual attraction to trees.

I think Swoboda just wanted an excuse to pull out a Seinfeld reference.

I don't care what the reason is, as long as Ronan never returns to the Stadium, I'm happy.

What? How exactly is that a joke? I thought it was going to be some kind of priest/rabbi joke. Instead its just an ####### comment.

It's supposed to be ironic.

He made a joke to an acquaintance of his right outside the door to his home; it's not like his paused in the middle of "God Bless America." Why this is anyone's business is beyond me.

The only way to correct this situation is to stop the singing of God Bless America -- in every park across the nation, from this moment forward and in perpetuity.

Baby please, I am not from Havana.

Size does matter, I guess.

Says the guy named after a giant lumberjack.

We must destroy all meanies from this here planet. Kill them all I say.

Tynan apologized, telling WNBC, “I would never want to hurt anybody’s feelings. It was stupid of me to be so callous.”

Too little, too late. The guy doesn't have a leg to stand on.

We must destroy all meanies from this here planet. Kill them all I say.

Newer and bluer Meanies have been sighted in the vicinity of this theatre!

There's only one way we can go out: SINGING!

Well, under the provisions of this bill, we would snatch two hundred thousand acres of Indian land, which we have deemed unsuitable for their use at this time. They're such children.

Two hundred thousand acres? Two hundred thousand acres? What'll it cost, man, what'll it cost?

A box of these [paddleballs].

Are you crazy? They'll never go for it. And then again they might. Those little red devils... they love toys!

and

These things are defective.

"And now for my next impression- Jesse Owens!"

"Somebody's gonna have to go back and get a shitload of dimes."

"Oh, I'm sorry sir. You're supposed to say that."
"What?"
"'Meeting is adjurned.'"
"It is?"
"No, you're supposed to say that."
"What?"
"'Meeting is adjurned.'"
"It is?"
"Never mind. Here, play with this."

"What the hell is this?"
"This is the bill that will convert the state hospital for the insane into the William J. Le Petomane memorial gambling casino for the insane."
"Gentlemen, this bill will be a giant step forward in the treatment of the insane gambler."

"I must have killed more men than Cecil B. DeMille."

"I got it! I got it!"
"You do?"
"We'll work up a Number 6 on 'em."
"'Number 6'"? I'm afraid I'm not familiar with that one."
"Well, that's where we go a-ridin' into town, a-whompin' and a-whoopin' every livin' thing that moves within an inch of its life. Except the women folks, of course."
"You spare the women?"
"Naw, we rape the sh!t out of them at the Number Six Dance later on."

Bart's old friend: "They said you was hung."

Bart: "And they was right."

“Are we awake?”
"I'm not sure. Are we black?"
"We are."
"Then we are awake, but we are very puzzled."

Bart: Well, Jim, since you are my guest and I am your host, what's your pleasure? What do you like to do?
Jim: Oh, I don't know. Play chess... screw...
Bart: [quickly] Well, let's play chess.

Lili Von Shtupp: Would you like another schnitzengruben?
Bart: No, thank you. Fifteen is my limit on schnitzengruben.
Lili Von Shtupp: Well, then how about a little...
[whispers in his ear]
Bart: Baby, please! I am not from Havana.

Hedley Lamarr: My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Taggart: God darnit, Mr. Lamarr, you use your tongue prettier than a twenty dollar whore.

Jim: Oh, boys! Lookee what I got heyuh.
Bart: Hey, where the white women at?

"OK--we'll give some land to the niggers and the spics; but we DON'T want the Irish"

Isn't this quote wrong?

Isn't this quote wrong?

Yes. It's "We'll give some land to the niggers and the chinks. But we don't want the Irish!"

Isn't this quote wrong?

It's the Chinks, I believe.

"This is the bill that will convert the state hospital for the insane into the William J. Le Petomane memorial gambling casino for the insane."

If you're a Blazing Saddles fan, think you know every joke in the movie and were not previously aware of this, you're going to love it.

If you're a Blazing Saddles fan, think you know every joke in the movie and were not previously aware of this, you're going to love it.

"Fartiste" might be my new favorite word.

"Fartiste" might be my new favorite word.

Word? I'm plugging it into Monster.com right now!

I hear jokes like this all the time. That's basically what Sarah Silverman built her career on.

I think people are missing the point here... The Yankees fired Tynan not because of the Jewish comment, but because he said he wouldnt mind if they were Red Sox fans.

Too little, too late. The guy doesn't have a leg to stand on.

Peoples, a very funny line went un-noted. Well done sir.

Tynan has, I believe, two prosthetic legs.

On "Le Pétomane": highly recommend Ricky Jay's book, "Learned Pigs and Fireproof Women." There's a chapter in there on Mr. Pujol, but a lot of other great stuff about sword-swallowers, high-divers, smart pigs & horses, sleight-of-hand tricksters, etc., etc.

Cannot be real. The farteur's birthname was actually Pujol?

Hate to unsaddle this jazz, but Jeff Blair goes off on Tynan...

Bad week for gasbags, wasn’t it? What with that insipid balloon nonsense in Colorado (honestly …. some people’s parents) and this latest bit of news that over-wrought, pretentious bag of wind Ronan Tynan won’t be committing audio assault during Yankees post-season games any more.

You can read the story here but the bottom line is that the freeloading, middling Irish tenor who glad-handed his way regularly into George Steinbrenner’s private box and became as tiresome a presence at Yankees games as Rudy Giuliani apparently dropped a few anti-Semitic comments recently.

It’s always nice when your suspicions about someone turn out to be accurate. Besides, the ‘God Bless America’ tripe is old. I’d rather watch another commercial than hearing some sap from ‘American Idol’ or some faux country blonde butcher the song.
.

Why this is anyone's business is beyond me.

Because if the Yankees don't take a strong stand the next thing you know somebody will have Hitler singing GBA.

Or something.

It's a straight cost/benefit analysis for the Yankees. Might somehow cost them some money to have Tyan perform. Won't cost them anything to make the gesture.

I just can't get over the effort somebody went to, to make sure the press found out about this. Did this occur during a taping of House Hunters?

You are only risking your lives, while I am risking an almost certain Academy Award nomination for best supporting actor.

No, thank you -- fifteen's my limit on schnitzengruben.

A black sheriff?

Why not? It worked in Blazing Saddles.