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Wednesday, September 09, 2009
Shysterball: Maybe the worst sports column ever
You’re a newspaper columnist. You’re on a deadline. You have to find something worthy of 800 words and you’re stumped. What do you do? Why, you use a horriffic 18 year-long child abduction, rape and imprisonment as a hook for a rehashed “aren’t those athletes just nutty” piece!
The writer, Mark Whicker of the OC Register, then proceeds to bullet point a couple dozen “oh, how times change” sports zingers. He ends the piece with what I guess is a pun of some kind: “Congratulations, Jaycee. You left the yard.”
Classy, Whicker. Now please go die in a fire someplace so I can use it as a hook for a “who’s hot, who’s not” bit.
Absolutely disgusting.
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He should have his....ooooh, wrong thread for that joke.
And then they put it in the paper! Good God.
Look, we already agreed it was a terrible idea; we're past that now. This guy doesn't need you piling on with more indicators of how bad an idea it was.
Pretty much. I kind of want to throw up after reading the snippet Craig posted.
And so Forth. This summer A.J. wrote 1 which was What if the Cambridge Police Had Arrested Milton Bradley Instead of Henry Lewis Gaits?
But some of his stuff is Ever Green like when they released those pictures from Aboo Grave and there was gentlemen getting tortured with a sack over their head and A.J. wrote his classic column Think That's Torture? How Would You Like to Have to Wear That Stupid Purple Uniform the Arizona Diamondbacks Do?
So you see Al it is all Rellative and you can never say No Worst There Is None.
Right. What makes this article even dumber is the list is filled with things the vast majority of people in LA/SC don't even care/know about, like when was the last time the Kings won a Stanley Cup. It's hilarious how out of touch most sportswriters are -- they think sports stories capture the attention of the average person and are some kind of a compass for society.
Someone else I know, however, asked him if it would be appropriate to use the Bataan Death March as a hook for a sports story showing just how long a marathon was. I lol'd.
I believe this is he first correctly spelled name in Jack Keefe history -- quite the honor!
Someone else I know, however, asked him if it would be appropriate to use the Bataan Death March as a hook for a sports story showing just how long a marathon was. I lol'd.
I actually can see where he is coming from, but I just don't think I would feel too comfortable making the leap from a tragedy like this to a light hearted column even if it's an attempt to be a celebration. I guess he was watching 50 first dates and saw that the summary worked for Adam Sandler to help lighten it up for Drews character.
Usually these type of articles are done when something of celebration happens that is a long drought (like when either of the Sox won the world series---best part which was "and the Cubs still haven't won") or celebration of a birthday (oldest man, oldest dog, turtle etc) but as a count of a tragedy it just seems wrong.
I mean imagine writing an article after 911 talking about the changes to the US since the last time an attack of that magnitude(Pearl Harbor) took place in the U.S.
Emphasis added.
I know that if I had been kidnapped and lost 18 years of my life and suffered constant physical abuse, the first thing I would want to be reminded of is how many things I missed over the last 18 years.
If this dude's ever lying in a hospice, terminally ill, I'm going to write him a letter "Hey, at least you'll get to miss Christmas!" to "celebrate" his life.
Wait, I used to refer to the walk from my off-campus apartment to my first class as "The Trail of Tears"...you're saying that was insensitive?
18 years of rape, torture and living in a prison shed - we can relate to that by listing freaking SPORTING events?
this guy doesn't not only put the toilet seat down, he uses this poor rape and torture victim AS a toilet seat.
he should get his column tooked away from him and gived to some body who can, you know, like, you know WRITE without poking at some poor kid who was abused for 18 long years
I actually used the phrase "Trail of tears" in a blog post within the past few months. I can't remember what it was I was referring to, but it was baseball. It wasn't an extended analogy or anything. Just the phrase. People freaked out on my ass.
Then again, anything I've ever written about the Indians that even refers to Wahoo obliquely causes a near riot.
That article is horrifying.
While I oftentimes wonder if our society has become a little too politically correct, there are some topics that even a simpleton should realize are taboo. For example, the degradation, exploitation and abuse of the weak and powerless. You would think it a no-brainer that kidnapping and imprisonment of children for purposes of sexual gratification should be off-limits for trivialization. When you don't speak out against such offensive language; you, in essence, condone it and allow it grow.
Whenever reports come out about young women held against their wills for years for such purposes come to light, I find it personally incredibly revolting as I have a daughter. How any sane person can make light of such a situation by writing, “Congratulations, Jaycee. You left the yard.” is totally f*cking appalling.
the fact that that sentence had the plural version of the word report is the truly appalling thing.
Too soon!
and i hope you wrote to the editor, too
Why, to get the guy fired?
Well, so did I, until you said that.
What about the editors? Shouldn't they have simply spiked this column? (sorry if already asked)
It seems their judgement was just as bad as the writer's to me, in running the thing.
Try writing about Wu Tang. "Method and NativeAmerican" doesn't have the ring.
The Register's editors allowed this dandy a few months ago claiming the OC baseball fans were happy K-Rod left because they are racist (written by Jeff Miller):
http://www.ocregister.com/articles/rodriguez-fans-angels-2252061-season-most
Whicker's a dim-wit for writing this crap, but the editors are ultimately responsible for printing it.
Los Angeles Clippers fans can probably relate.
Many odd things have happened in sports the past 18 years
I'm sure that's exactly what was on the victim's mind.
I doubt he'll get, fired, for this very reason. Some editor is supposed to read this and say, "What the #### were you thinking Whicker? We can't run this."
But based on the overwhelming and justifiable negative reaction, I suspect the OC will be doing some considerable apologizing in the next 12 hours.
No - what is even more horrific is that there are most likely others imprisioned as we speak.
After more thought, I don't doubt that the article's author means well and most likely did mean to celebrate this young lady's freedom in his own ham-fisted way of writing. But to be able take this topic and turn such visceral tragedy into a light hearted celebration, you'd better be the second coming of William f*cking Shakespeare. This dude should stick to sportswriting and thank his lucky stars if he doesn't get ####-canned over this column.
He did, though. If you look at the comments over at Shyster Ball, that's exactly what he did.
He's an ass and adds nothing to the Register whatsoever.
He saved that, together with some nice personal insults, for the private emails he sent back to some of the people who emailed him directly. Take a look at some of the examples from posters at Craig's linked article above.
Edit: my first purchase of a coke!
Ok, I see. I had only read the Register version. I didn't see any personal insults though.
going through your archive for your "Mary Jo Kopechne Missed the Amazin' Mets" story.
That dude needs to be a Primate, because that is gold, Jerry, gold!
I suspect his first instinct was to defend his work and believe others had misinterpreted it. As the volume of complaints poured in to him and his editors, it became clear to him (or, them) that if no one is "getting it," then the fault doesn't lie with the reader.
I am surprised that Whicker's judgment was this bad after all these years in the biz.
I'm hopeful that I can be forgiven for this lapse of professionalism by those who were affected most profoundly.
I don't see how, if Jimmy the Greek or Howard Cosell or even *shudder* Don Imus can be taken to task and fired for a truly off-the-cuff comment on live broadcast, this guy can be allowed to keep his job. Regardless of whether editors should have caught it, he should be done, if we're being consistent about this. Now I'm not sure if in a vacuum I think he should be done, but anyone who thought so for Imus (for the one incident, some argued it was a pattern and therefore that would be different), or JtG, or Michael Richards (in the sense of not getting future work) would have some heavy explaining to convince me that this isn't at least as bad.
As for "you can't unring a bell", that's true, but the Register could start by pulling down the ####### column. Link it directly to the apology, but taking it down isn't 1984-ish, it's just polite.
This headline near the article in question on the OC's website. Perhaps Mr. Whicker can use this for his next light-hearted sports column. And incorporate the word "boneyard" somehow.
Emphasis mine.
I wrote a column for the better part of 15 years, rr. While I never wrote anything that generated this kind of intensely negative reaction, there were the occasional columns that were interpreted differently than I intended them. The first instict, which I think is quite natural, is to assume the reader just didn't get it. With a little time, you can come to evaluate it more objectively.
FWIW, I do believe that Whicker's intention was to genuinely celebrate Jaycee's release. He just monumentally failed at the task, something he only belatedly realized by the sheer volume of comments, or was forced to acknowledge by his editors. His apology seems decent enough that I'll give him the benefit of the doubt that he's finally come to realize that it wasn't the readers' failure, but his.
Man, oh, man.
You're probably right. I suspect, though, that he still thinks people didn't get it and was ordered to apologize, as Jeff K suggests.
I see your point, but two wrongs don't make a right.
My point is that for those who don't think the first ones were wrongs (Imus, et al), they have to think firing this guy is right. Right?
Jack Keefe made a Gerard Manley Hopkins reference! "Pitched past pitch of grief"!
This headline near the article in question on the OC's website. Perhaps Mr. Whicker can use this for his next light-hearted sports column. And incorporate the word "boneyard" somehow.
"It's amazing, the amount of trouble that a tiny chip of bone can cause. Just look at Dave Hollins's wrist..."
I'd rather see the paper and columnist truly own the mistake.
I wouldn't include Imus in that list Jeff. He was specifically and deliberately insulting the Rutgers women at the time. He wasn't trying, but failing, to celebrate them. He was actively denigrating them, and in the process using language that struck a nerve. That, plus his history, distinguishes him from the others.
Cosell never should have been fired for what he said, which really was an attempt to convey a positive feeling about that Redskins receiver (was it Alvin Garrett perhaps). I supposed then, and now, that the Little Monkey remark was just the impetus ABC needed to finally can a guy whose negatives among viewers were at least equal to his positives.
As for Jimmy The Greek, again it's slightly different, in that he was spouting bogus science to describe racial differences. Probably could have survived, but again, CBS may not have been too eager to keep him, thus making him easier to sacrifice than to put up a fight for.
So no, I don't think I'd figure Whicker. But if you do, then the editors that let it go really have to go with him.
Right! (I know, you were just making a point about consistency)
You can truly own it while not leaving it up. I don't know, it's not that big a deal to me, but if you recognize that it's offensive (and to a huge majority, there's not one comment in support of it that I see), is it Orwellian to take it down, or is it the right thing?
This is not comparable to Don Imus, in my opinion. Imus spent 30 years deliberately trying to shock and offend. This guy just wrote something stupid.
I wouldn't say it's Orwellian, because it's a private business, and they can do what they want. But it's not like it can be removed from the papers or the libraries, so it'll exist *somewhere*. And when more people see it, more people will be able to learn from somebody else's mistake.
I should god-damn hope so. Seriously, I'm an #######, and I think other people are too thin-skinned about a lot of stuff. But if his intention was anything other than to genuinely celebrate the release of that girl (whom I hadn't heard of before all this, but sounds like she went through hell), then burn him.
I can laugh at Chappelle's whole bit on Elizabeth Smart and the black girl who freed herself. It'd be harder to imagine something funny wrapped around this story, but it'd be possible. But it would take a black heart to not be glad she's done going through it, physically at least, as I'm sure she'll be reliving it mentally for a good portion of her remaining life.
I wouldn't include Imus in that list Jeff. He was specifically and deliberately insulting the Rutgers women at the time. He wasn't trying, but failing, to celebrate them. He was actively denigrating them, and in the process using language that struck a nerve. That, plus his history, distinguishes him from the others.
Yeah, first time around I noted that some thought Imus was part of a pattern, and if so, they weren't included.
Well, he wasn't actually fired from anything. If someone doesn't want to give him work, well, that's too bad for Cosmo. But just as I don't think Whicker warrants getting fired over this (absent other incidents), I also think future potential employers would be perfectly justified in putting his resume in the "Don't Hire" file.
FWIW, Jeff, I think they should leave it up as well. "Teachable moment" as a phrase gets used too much, but this can be a clinic about how real-world concerns should stay the hell out of sports columns.
Real world concerns can be worked into a sports column effectively, if there's an actual relationship between the sporting event/participants and real world concerns.
But you can't just throw together real world concerns and unrelated sports, and that's especially true when it's the kidnapping and rape of a specific individual.
Helen Keller, on the other hand...
FWIW, Jeff, I think they should leave it up as well. "Teachable moment" as a phrase gets used too much, but this can be a clinic about how real-world concerns should stay the hell out of sports columns.
You can leave it available for those seeking it (and wanting to use it as a teachable moment in, say, their journalism class) without leaving it where it was.
What good does it do to take it down, aside from appealing to some people's standards of taste? That's not meant sarcastically or rhetorically, but I'm not seeing the greater good. I'd slap an editor's note on top of it with a link to the apology and another apology, and let people fire away at the columnist in the comments.
And it's not just a lesson for journalists. Anybody who opens their mouth to an audience can learn from this, too. Off the top of my head, Nick Saban comparing an Alabama loss to 9/11, for example.
What are the complaints, including yours or mine, other than an expression that the article offended our standard of taste? If the paper recognizes that in the form of at least asking (if not forcing) Whicker to apologize, why leave it up to offend others? Why not change the page to something saying "Homeslice wrote something stupid. Here's his apology (link) and here, if you want to read it, but please note many readers felt it was over the line and disrespectful to the girl and others in her situation (and maybe even 'as well as all people who think sports are overvalued') so be so forewarned"? I'm not saying it's necessary, but where's the harm?
Fair points. I suppose I reserve yanking stories down for only emergencies (libelous material, dangerous lapses in judgment), but I can see where you're coming from.
I don't think anyone is really questioning 'intent' -- it's a matter of being such a ham-handed ####### about it. I don't know that it's a fireable offense because it's so insensitive and assinine in and of itself, it is because anyone that would write this AND SUBMIT IT rather than crumple it and toss with a "what was I thinking" probably doesn't have much to offer in terms of written opinion.
Given that he's a columnist, it's quite possible that he's the highest-paid guy in his department, and extremely likely he makes more than non-executive editors.
So the blame likely will get dispersed more widely than if some kid blundered and no one on the desk caught it. Veteran columnists have a LOT of leeway, with desks that sometimes are told not to question anything and other times are just afraid to....
(libelous material, dangerous lapses in judgment)
By the latter, do you mean something like printing instructions on how to build pipe bombs?
It seems, to me at least, that nobody had any malice in their hearts--it was just plain old clumsy writing, and see-no-evil
editing.
I guess I just don't like seeing a guy have his life ruined for one, non-criminal, mistake.
Or the name of an otherwise anonymous rape victim.
TOO SOON!
I think the article was in exceptionally poor taste, but intent matters. I'll go on a limb here and say that it was a terrible decision but that the writer is a few degrees shy of history's greatest monster and maybe it would be okay if he were allowed to continue in his chosen profession.
...or perhaps details that were part of someone's sealed grand jury testimony?
(ducks)
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