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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

The Baseball Talmud: Megdal: The AL Batting Title and the Jewish People

Or as we thought “Across The Universe” lyrics went..."High Carew gave vroom. Nothing’s gonna change my world...”

Well, the news isn’t good for the injured Ian Kinsler. What was initially diagnosed as a sore left groin now appears to be a sports hernia that will likely sideline Kinsler for the rest of the season.

While this is bad news for Kinsler, it may not be the worst news for him from the AL batting title standpoint. Here is how the race currently shapes up, through games of August 18:

Mauer .325
Pedroia .320
Kinsler .319
Youkilis .317
Bradley .316

Italics indicates Jewish player

Repoz Posted: August 19, 2008 at 06:24 PM | 31 comment(s)
Related News: General, Boston, Texas, Awards

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1. Srul Itza Posted: August 19, 2008 at 10:20 PM (#2909591)

So, when do we change Youkilis' nickname, from "the Greek God of Walks" to "the Hebrew Hammer"?

2. baseclog Posted: August 19, 2008 at 10:29 PM (#2909618)

Milton Bradley isn't Jewish?

3. Herschel Pinkus Yerucham Shmoikel Krustofsky Posted: August 19, 2008 at 10:39 PM (#2909638)

So, when do we change Youkilis' nickname, from "the Greek God of Walks" to "the Hebrew Hammer"?

Ryan Braun's got it covered.

4. andrewberg of udub law Posted: August 19, 2008 at 10:50 PM (#2909657)

Israeli Impaler?

5. Boots Day Posted: August 19, 2008 at 10:52 PM (#2909660)

The Sephardic Slammer?

6. HowardMegdal Posted: August 19, 2008 at 11:29 PM (#2909691)

I am all for any of these. The two best Jewish nicknames go to Barney "The Yiddish Curver" Pelty, who few remember, and Mose "The Rabbi of Swat" Solomon, who is largely remembered for a big home run season in a Class C hitters' park. So this needs to happen.
My nominees
"Mightier Than an Minyan"
"40 Years in the Batters Box"
"The Everything Bagel"

7. Lassus Posted: August 19, 2008 at 11:30 PM (#2909692)

The Kvetching Crusher?

8. Robert Machemer Posted: August 19, 2008 at 11:48 PM (#2909705)

Nu Kid on the Block?

Bashkenazi?

The Abrahammer?

MVMOT?

9. Kris Posted: August 19, 2008 at 11:51 PM (#2909708)

The ribbie rabbi?

10. Tschingsch Posted: August 20, 2008 at 12:11 AM (#2909717)

Well, given the team he plays for, perhaps the Monster Meshugeneh?

11. Robert Machemer Posted: August 20, 2008 at 12:15 AM (#2909720)

Mel MOT?

12. Dan Posted: August 20, 2008 at 12:15 AM (#2909722)

The ribbie rabbi?

I kind of like "The Rabbi of Ribbies"

13. baseclog Posted: August 20, 2008 at 02:44 AM (#2909814)

Very dumb one by me:

Jolting Jew

14. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: August 20, 2008 at 08:48 AM (#2909878)

The Rabbi of Ribbies

"The Reb of Ribbies" is just a touch snappier, I think.

Two cents:

The Kosher Crusher (pace #7).

15. Lassus Posted: August 20, 2008 at 08:51 AM (#2909880)

Well, I was working 2 angles on mine. ;-)

16. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: August 20, 2008 at 08:53 AM (#2909883)

The Circumcised Colossus.

17. Rocco's Malfunctioning Mitochondria (Brickhaus) Posted: August 20, 2008 at 09:33 AM (#2909910)

The moyle of recoil?

18. Moscow Hiding In The Shadows Posted: August 20, 2008 at 09:35 AM (#2909913)

The Reb of Ribbies

Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have a winner. I like "The Circumcised Colossus" just as much, but the problem is that one of the goyim might try to muscle in on it.

19. Toby Posted: August 20, 2008 at 04:33 PM (#2910499)

The Halakha Walker

(that is, in Boston accent, something like The Halakha Walkha)

20. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: August 20, 2008 at 04:45 PM (#2910527)

How about "That nice young boy with a steady job who needs a good woman so he can settle down, and maybe call his mother once in a while"?

21. aleskel Posted: August 20, 2008 at 04:46 PM (#2910535)

huh, I never put it together than Kinsler was Jewish. It was probably the first name that threw me off - what kind of Jew names a kid Ian?

22. Baseballing powerhouse Crispix Attacks Posted: August 20, 2008 at 04:48 PM (#2910539)

Ladies and gentlemen, I think we have a winner. I like "The Circumcised Colossus" just as much, but the problem is that one of the goyim might try to muscle in on it.

Yeah, Mike Piazza's had his eye on the Circumcised Colossus for quite some time.

23. aleskel Posted: August 20, 2008 at 04:49 PM (#2910541)

oh, and I had a couple of nickname ideas, but I realized they all involved derogatory names, so I won't go there.

24. Moscow Hiding In The Shadows Posted: August 20, 2008 at 05:13 PM (#2910571)

oh, and I had a couple of nickname ideas, but I realized they all involved derogatory names, so I won't go there.

Yeah, I don't think that "The ######' ###", "The ########' ####", or especially "The ###### ####" would go over too well in our modern world. Better to stick with "The Ferocious Gentleman*" and then just circumcise the asterisk. But enough with the nostalgia.

25. aleskel Posted: August 20, 2008 at 05:24 PM (#2910595)

perhaps the Monster Meshugeneh?

for the record "meshugenah" is the adjectival form - it would have to be either "the meshugenah monster" or "the monster meshugener"

26. Softball-Playing Human Refuses to Be Walked Posted: August 20, 2008 at 05:24 PM (#2910596)

The Abrahammer?

Ten minutes later, and I'm still laughing at this one.

27. Robert Machemer Posted: August 20, 2008 at 06:41 PM (#2910660)

Ten minutes later, and I'm still laughing at this one.

Thanks. :)

(Just in case, though, check to see that there's not a nitrous oxide leak in your apartment).

28. Gold Star for Robot Boy Posted: August 20, 2008 at 07:37 PM (#2910749)

When Shawn Green was in a lengthy slump for the Dodgers, I suggested nicknaming him "The Zero of Zion."

29. Fraud Cried the Maddened Thousands Posted: August 20, 2008 at 08:07 PM (#2910821)

The Kosher Thrill?

30. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: August 20, 2008 at 09:01 PM (#2910955)

The Tzaddik of the First Base.

31. Frank Rook Posted: August 20, 2008 at 09:16 PM (#2910994)

Braun actually isn't fond of the Hebrew Hammer. He sorta liked "He-Brewer".

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Tuesday, August 19, 2008

The Baseball Talmud: Megdal: The AL Batting Title and the Jewish People

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