I feel awful. I always looked forwards to his comments/columns. Crap.

Wow. I do remember him from quite a few Yankee threads, again, terrible news. The web is such a strange place where people who are, essentially, a part of our everyday lives can be taken from us and we don't necessarily know that they are gone.

True. It is unusual that we know the actual name of people who post here, in fact.

And if we saw a blog entry saying "Terrible news: I want to let all of BTF’s readers know that one of our most prolific writers and favorite people, ?Donde esta Dagoberto Campaneris?, just passed away." it would be a little hard to appreciate the gravity of the situation.

(replace "Rowland Office Supplies" with "Declino DeShields", "Van Lingle Mungo Jerry", "Rowland Office Supplies", etc.)

Just awful news. John was one of the regulars here I would have liked to meet in person. Just shocking and sad.

Something cosmic about the fact that he goes the same day Loria screws Florida out of a stadium.

It's a strange feeling to mourn someone you only know as a name on a byline or post, but this is truly sad.

If anyone knows about his family asking for donations to a particular charity or anything like that, please share.

And I second the tribute idea suggested in #163.

Best regards,

aleskel

Good point Crispix. As such, I would like to reveal my real name to you: I am none other than former Cars guitarist Elliot Easton.

I think it's safe to say that none of us can post anything in this thread that would measure up to what John would have posted.

It won't be the same watching the Jays this year without John's musings. What a terrible development.

(replace "Rowland Office Supplies" with "Declino DeShields", "Van Lingle Mungo Jerry", "Rowland Office Supplies", etc.)

Jesus, Crispix, I feel like I just read my own obituary. Don't do that to me again.

Sorry VLMJ, I didn't know that was your real name.

"Sadly, Crispix is no longer Attacking, as he passed away Saturday morning after a long battle with Cushing's disease. His real name was Crispix McMillan McNish. Cards and letters may be sent to the following address:"

My condolences to his family and friends, and may he RIP. BTF is a fun escape from work, and John always made it that much more enjoyable.

Re: John Brattain's health

As far as I know, the heart ailment was just the most recent in a long line of very serious issues John had been battling for quite a while. Over his time at THT, he was in and out of the hospital several times for this or that entirely non-trivial procedure, all of which appeared to involve significant degrees of pain and agony. And he had survived a very bad car accident (motorcycle? I don't remember) about 15 years ago.

Yet his mood when relating these challenges was never in the least self-pitying, unfailingly good-humored and self-effacing. And he maintained a rigorous writing schedule throughout.

It's customary, of course, to say nothing but what a great person anyone was who just passed away. But in this case, he does seem to have been genuinely quite extraordinary.

So sad. He was probably the only universally liked person here. With his glowing personality, I doubt Primer was the only place in which that was true.

Ah crap. Perhaps it's time for a Primer Hall Of Fame. John is clearly a first balloteer.

Best regards John, best regards.

You wanna joke, John? Ok.

John Brattain stumbles into a bar and slumps into a booth with four other guys. A minute later, he stumbles up to the bar and tells the bartender "I bet you $20CND I can bite my eye." The bartender says ok. John pops out his glass eye, bites it, smiles, and says "Double or nothin', I can bite my other eye." The bartender says ok. John pops out his false teeth and bites his other eye. John says, "Double or nothin', slide a beer mug down the bar, I'll run along the stools and piss in it and not miss a single drop." The bartender moves all of the patrons off their stools, everyone prepares themselves, and they're off. John pisses everywhere: on the bar, on the back bar, on the bartender, not a drop in the mug. John is laughing, the bartender is laughing, the house is laughing. The bartender says, "Why are you laughing? You just lost $40." John says, "See those four guys over there in that booth? I bet them each $100 that I could piss in your face and you'd laugh!"

Hope you like it. It's the best I've got.

Sorry you're not going to be around for the Bud Selig funeral/ worm/ fish/ cat by-product/ maggot/urine ceremony. I've scoped out Kenesaw Mountain Landis' gravesite to harvest the worms like I said I would.

Condolences to all.

Best Regards,

jwb

Such sad news.

I was going to say rest in peace.

But that's not right.

John, I wish you an eternity of bad puns, groaning jokes, stretched analogies ... and the uproarious laughter of everyone around you. :-)

You're already missed.

And say hi to Doug Pappas for all of us too.

I'm never good at these condolences things, so I usually don't post. I'll merely add that I will miss John's writing (I hope that doesn't sound too selfish), and always remember OT converstaions about fishing we had way back when.

How did John stumble into baseball writing? I recall a thread eons ago where he said that he used to do work with Lee Sinins way back when. I sort of feel like I know John, but I don't really know all that much about him.

The death of someone you've never met or interacted with shouldn't affect you this way.

I was riding the bus home, reading the tributes on my blackberry and began to tear up.

It makes me sad he's gone, but happy for this community he leaves behind. One full of vibrant, witty, intelligent people who clearly care not just about this game we obsess and agonize over, but for each other.

Due to a child at home and a Web filter at work I don't visit as often as I should, but this is a reminder I should.

If only because I feel poorer for missing John's jokes.

Best regards John, like Gehrig and Clemente - a Hall of Famer taken too soon.

SMinDC

Oh this is bad. ########. Thanks for the laughs John.

Remember the caption contest one link had for a sign someone held up behind Bonds? I think it was made for John.

This place won't be nearly as punny without John around. (Sorry John, it was forced, I'll do better when I'm done being whistful.)

The death of someone you've never met or interacted with shouldn't affect you this way.

I was riding the bus home, reading the tributes on my blackberry and began to tear up.

It makes me sad he's gone, but happy for this community he leaves behind. One full of vibrant, witty, intelligent people who clearly care not just about this game we obsess and agonize over, but for each other.

Due to a child at home and a Web filter at work I don't visit as often as I should, but this is a reminder I should.

If only because I feel poorer for missing John's jokes.

Best regards John, like Gehrig and Clemente - a Hall of Famer taken too soon.

SMinDC

"You don't care if your kid gets A's B's or C's on his report card, you just want to know how high he is above the class average."

It's always funnier when it's true. My son brought home 2 Ds and I blew them off because he scored above the 80th percentile on the standardized tests in the subjects.

I can't say I ever directly had a discussion with him but I always enjoyed his presence. I can only imagine what those close to him are going through.

The death of someone you've never met or interacted with shouldn't affect you this way.

I was riding the bus home, reading the tributes on my blackberry and began to tear up.

It makes me sad he's gone, but happy for this community he leaves behind. One full of vibrant, witty, intelligent people who clearly care not just about this game we obsess and agonize over, but for each other.

Due to a child at home and a Web filter at work I don't visit as often as I should, but this is a reminder I should.

If only because I feel poorer for missing John's jokes.

Best regards John, like Gehrig and Clemente - a Hall of Famer taken too soon.

SMinDC

Just read the terrible sad news. John, you'll truly be missed.

The death of someone you've never met or interacted with shouldn't affect you this way.

You mean like making you triple post?

I think snark is appropriate in a Brattain remberance thread.

A triple post from a mobile device?

Gotta be John messing with me.

As someone who watched his wife battle one chronic illness after another until her body simply gave out at 47, I can understand how much his family will miss him, grieve for him terribly, yet on some level feel relief that he doesn't have to go through the pain anymore. What a strong, strong person John had to be. I loved reading posts and articles--sought them out, as a matter of fact. I'd like to think my life was somehow a little brighter because of his talents.

Best Regards,

wj

So long, John. You were always very supportive of me, and although we never met, I considered you a good friend. I love you, John. You were one of a kind, and you had an impact on those who were fortunate enough to have crossed your path.

Best regards,

Larry

I don't know that there's ever been anyone I've never met in person whom I feel I knew as well, and liked as much, as John.

Hear, hear.

My first meaningful job in sports writing was as MLB editor of the now-defunct sportstalk.com, probably 10 years ago. During that time, I had the privilege of editing John's work. He'd file a column and tell me how closely I needed to proofread based on how much he'd been drinking when he wrote it (he actually had some kind of 10-point scale for this purpose). And then I'd barely touch a word.

He was just a good, good man. John and his family will be at the top of my prayers tonight, and I'll hoist a pint in his honor. Fair sailing, my friend.


Best Regards,

Dayn

Best regards, John. Just don't know what else to say.

To be honest, I think his only regret was that he couldn't take Samson and Loria with him.

GGC: yes, Steve was at the Yankee game this summer. Steve had had some significant health problems this offseason, but was getting better and they thought he'd be back home by sometime in April. His passing was sudden and unexpected.

For any local folks interested, there's actually going to be a memorial for him this Saturday afternoon. I'll send details via email to anybody who asks.

David, I am interested, although I'm unsure if I can do anything.

Kevin has asked me to pass along his condolences to John's family and friends, that he is saddened by John's tragic passing, and that John was a warm, funny person, great fun, who will be missed a great deal by kevin personally and of course by all.

To be honest, I think his only regret was that he couldn't take Samson and Loria with him.

Don't forget Selig.

####### horrible news. Best regards John

What everyone else said. You'll be missed, John.

What was wrong with him? A few poster have hinted at things, about his body betraying him and chronic pain, but what was the actual problem (if someone wants to share). Was that related to the heart problem?

Aside from what Treder noted in post #211, IIRC Brattain once mentioned here that he had a stroke (!) around age 30. Maybe I'm misremembering and thinking of the car accident Treder mentioned above, though. Back in the days of the primeys, someone one nominated John for best serious post when he discussed his health issues. He'd had some serious problems since age 29 or 30. Basically, if you check back his THT archives, a lot of the breaks in his writing over the last year or two are when he was in the hospital for various un-fun procedures.

Thanks, David. I didn't know him from rsbb or anything but he seemed like a good guy.

Damn, this sucks. Reading THT (and BBTF) won't be the same.

Very sad news. John was so much a part of what made this place worth visiting. Good humor and light outlook in the face of neverending flame wars.

Condolences to his family for their loss, which so greatly outweighs ours.

Hoist one in heaven for the rest of us John.

Basically, if you check back his THT archives, a lot of the breaks in his writing over the last year or two are when he was in the hospital for various un-fun procedures.

Every break, as far as I could tell. It was quite clear that every day John could possibly write, he did.

I know he had some kind of semi-regular role on a sports radio show, as well. That had to have been a hoot.

I'm in tears right now. John was my favorite writer on THT and one of my favorite posters here. His humor reminded me of my father's, who also died young.

I once submitted an article of his on Barry Bonds, which I thought was one of the most reasoned, sensible perspectives on Bonds in sports journalism. I never knew him, but ate up every word he wrote.

RIP, brother. So sad.

Terribly late to this one, but I'd just like to add to the long stream of posters who appreciated John's good humor and his contributions to the site.

Small solace for his family to be sure.... but perhaps someone at the appropriate time can let his family know about a thread that commemorates the number of lives that their loved one touched via his insights here.

Best regards, indeed.

Somebody with that many physical problems shouldn't be so damn cheerful. Makes the rest of us look bad.

Best regards, John -- the gentle giant* of BTF.

(*Relative to David Samson)

Neka počiva u miru Božjem!

A triple post from a mobile device?

Gotta be John messing with me.

The world doesn't have enough charming, funny people in it that it can afford to lose one of them.

Damn. I always knew his posts would make me laugh. Thank you, John and rest in peace.

Not much I can add to what's been said. I've always looked forward to John's writing, both his articles and posts, and will really miss them...

to anyone who knows john's family...please pass the thoughts of this thread (and others) on to them.

a good man has passed....

"The death of someone you've never met or interacted with shouldn't affect you this way."

Even if Sean already thirded himself, I'll second him. It's a rather hideous downside to being a chronic lurker that I'd never considered until now: John's posts and articles cheered up my day when I really needed it with ridiculously high frequency, and I've wasted my chances to ever let him know that or thank him for it.

Even if it is far past due ... thanks, John. And one more set of best regards.

Condolences to all.
John-- Thanks for the joy. You will be missed and remembered.

I wish his family the best, and hope that he finds peace. I'll miss him.

His articles were always a must read for me and his posts always enhanced the conversation. My prayers go out to his family.

Rest in peace, John

his posts always enhanced the conversation

Except when they derailed the conversation, to the unending benefit of all participants.

I did actually just toast John here in my kitchen in NC. A bit odd, as my 8-month old daughter on my left arm was the only witness, but it felt right and I'm glad I did.

Looking forward to a memorial fund for those that survive him.

Except when they derailed the conversation, to the unending benefit of all participants.

####, does that mean we're now looking at 10,000-thread posts on religion and steroids instead of 1,000?

BRATTAIN!

Wow. Sad to hear he went so but good to hear scripture and his relationship w/God was important to him. I'll miss his writing and his humor terribly, but I'm don't think he'd come back for anything, not even if God promised to move the Expos back.

Looking forward to a memorial fund for those that survive him.

Agreed. I hope it doesn't sound too crass, but I'll pledge a donantion right now.

edit: Oh, and I'm going to start going to the gym again tomorrow.

How very sad. John was a very smart guy and a big contributor to baseball discussions in a lot of places, but I'll remember him mostly for his humoUr and unrelenting need to make a joke. Next time I find myself in a thread where people are bashing chests like the elephant seals at Año Nuevo, I'll think wow, this thread could use a John Brattain post, and it won't come, and that will make me sad.

A terrible loss. My heart goes out to his family.

I'm newish here, but jeez--how awful. Just knowing him from his posts, he seemed like a very friendly, funny guy. RIP.

What do you mean I have to root for the Angels now?


Are you sure this isn't Hell?

You'll be missed, John.

Best Regards,
rlc

SacBunt, There is no wrong time or place.

I still have a copy somewhere of the NY Post headline when Roger Maris died:

"MARIS TRADED TO ANGELS"

Yes, really.

Best regards, John

I still have a copy somewhere of the NY Post headline when Roger Maris died:

"MARIS TRADED TO ANGELS"

Yes, really.

So, Brattain used to work as a headline writer for the NY Post. Who knew?

This is a heck of a community, folks. One in which we can all feel so genuinely that a man the vast majority of us have never laid eyes on is someone we'll nevertheless miss, deeply. The humor and heart that John added will be sorely missed, that's certain. But he'd be the first to remind us that there remains plenty of wit -- he was always amazingly quick to praise anyone who'd made him laugh with a post, after all -- and ability to see the funny that baseball always has in store for us.

John wouldn't have wasted his time on a place that didn't give him something -- a lot, in fact -- back for all the terrific things he brought here. I have a pretty strong sense that he'd want us to keep in mind that BTF was a great source of happiness and fulfillment to him, and that he'd send us a heartfelt "best regards" for all that we gave each other.

It won't be the same without him, but it's still going to be special. Just wanted to say that.

Sh!t, Sam M., here I thought I was finished crying for the afternoon ...

I open up my facebook (it's 8am here), and i read from Larry "We'll miss you John", adn then I started getting this sinking feeling as I opened up BBTF (at work, just like John would have wanted).

John would have also wanted us to each make an obscene comment, I couldn't come up with anything 10 minutes ago, so here it goes:

So that's the second person I've had die on my Facebook.


Best regards John, we'll miss you.

John - You will be missed. It's clear that you will be leaving a big void here, at THT, at BDD, and anywhere you've graced us online. That said, I cannot begin to imagine the impact on people who knew you best, especially your family.

If any of the Brattains are reading this... I hope the words expressed in this thread convey to you that we know how special John was, and that we know how lucky we are that he was loaned to us for 44 years. Though we cannot comprehend your loss, you are certainly not alone in missing him. It is hard for some of us to help you and your family from a distance, but please let us know if there is some way we can help you through this difficult time.

Ah crap. Perhaps it's time for a Primer Hall Of Fame. John is clearly a first balloteer.

Screw the PHOF. They'd allow in all sorts of mediocrities, like "T.J. makes a mochary or the sport." First Ballot for the Primer Hall of MERIT for Brattain!

I'll miss him, too. Wow.

Best Regards,

T.J.

I remember way back in the day, very likely on old primer, one of John's stupid jokes annoyed me for no other reason that it being stupid. So, went all sarcastic on him. He was so nice and friendly in jabbing back at me that I felt like the biggest ass in the world. Ever since then I've been far more humble in my internetting. A good man teaches you lessons like that without even meaning to.

You'll be missed John.

Unbelievable. Terrible, just terrible.

It was an oddly proud moment for me when I became the unwitting subject of one of John's many, many handles, after I spoke of a stinking drunk Meatwad crashing at my place after a Cubs/Brewers game. John christened himself "retro's violated futon."

And of course, there was much, much more where that came from. Best regards, John, indeed.

I posted this on the RLYW:

About two years ago, my friend and colleague John Brattain let the THT staff know that he was having some serious health problems. With John’s passing, I re-read the email I sent him in reply, and it pretty much sums up how I feel about John:

One is loathe to write in response to the kinds of things that you’ve been saying lately, because you don’t want to come across as pessimistic, callous, or even selfish. So we keep what we have to say to ourselves, and when the opportunity to say them is gone, we have regrets we can never quite get over. So to hell with it:

I love you, John. I think I speak for all of us here when I say that, and for all of the people who know you in the baseball community. There is probably nobody more universally loved in our community right now than you, and there probably never will be. You are a good man, too good to suffer like you have so far in this life. Your appreciation for all that you have and have had, and your positive attitude towards all your misfortune only entitles you to so much more joy, and we all are hoping that you get it.

I’ve had my own little misfortunes in life, though nothing remotely close to what you’ve gone through, but you are taking this so much better than I ever have—hell, you’re even taking your own misfortunes better than I am. When I see your attitude, I feel personally guilty for feeling as down about myself as I do.

So I’ll close by saying again: I love you. I’m grateful for knowing you, even in the limited way that we all know each other though our computer screens—and I’m grateful that we’ve had this technology in my lifetime, so that I could have the pleasure of knowing you. And I hope to know you for many, many more years.

Best Regards

Larry

I still love you, John, and I always will. Goodbye, my friend. There will never be another John Brattain.

(If John were here, he’d reply “Thank God!")

Best Regards,

Larry Mahnken

John Brattain dies and retroshiite returns from the grave. Weird day.

We Hall of Meriters are heartless - we haven't elected Addie Joss, or Ross Youngs, or Kirby Puckett, and we had the nerve to slam Roberto Clemente's lack of plate discipline before he got elected.

So Brattain's election clearly will not be out of sentiment, but lifetime performance.

That's how we roll.

John Brattain dies and retroshiite returns from the grave. Weird day.

I've been lurking around. It just took this sad occasion to compel me to post.

This thread remind anyone else of the "Chuckles the Clown Bites the Dust" episode of the Mary Tyler Moore Show? You feel sad but the last thing the departed would want you to do is cry about it.

A little song, a little dance, a little seltzer down your pants. -- Though with John, it might be something a bit more sinister than seltzer.

I've been lurking around. It just took this sad occasion to compel me to post.

Even more reason for us to hope for things that are happy.

I KNOW there was a specific post by John saying he'd want a 10 page thread full of jokes in poor taste when he left us, and I can't seem to find it right now, and it's REALLY pissing me off.

This thread is a tremendous testament to the man and all the lives he touched with his humor and wit. Can't ever remember an ungracious comment coming from the man. The best tribute to JB is to remember to treat people well in your life, even the ones you disagree with or don't even like very much.

None of us will be around forever. Try to leave the place better than the way you found it.

Best regards to you all.

263. GORDON COLE!!, Enthusiastic GRS Cheerleader™ Posted: March 24, 2009 at 08:12 PM (#3113586)
I'm newish here

Funny, you don't look newish.


/Brattain

I read a wonderfully poignant article the other day by a colleague mourning her spouse's recent (way too young) passing, and I meant to email her (she's on vacation) to let her know how impressed I was. But I hadn't gotten around to it.

Tonight, that message got sent.

'nuff said.

Clarence the Angel (ironically) from "It's a Wonderful Life"

"Strange, isn't it? Each man's life touches so many other lives. When he isn't around he leaves an awful hole, doesn't he?"

Who among us with 40 more years could ask for more?

A dying man gathered his best friends - a lawyer, doctor and clergyman - at his bedside and handed each of them an envelope containing $25,000 in cash. He made them each promise that after his death and during his repose, they would place the three envelops in his coffin. He told them that he wanted to have enough money to enjoy the next life.

A week later the man died. At the wake, the lawyer and doctor and clergyman each concealed an envelope in the coffin and bid their old client and friend farewell.

By chance, these three met several months later. Soon the clergyman, feeling guilty, blurted out a confession saying that there was only $10,000 in the envelope he placed in the coffin. He felt, rather than waste all the money, he would send it to a mission in South America. He asked for their forgiveness.
The doctor, moved by the gentle Clergyman's sincerity, confessed that he too had kept some of the money for a worthy medical charity. The envelope, he admitted, had only $8000 in it. He said he too could not bring himself to waste the money so frivolously when it could be used to benefit others.

By this time the Lawyer was seething with self-righteous outrage. He expressed his deep disappointment in the felonious behavior of two of his oldest and most trusted friends. "I am the only one who kept my promise to our dying friend. I want you both to know that the envelope I placed in the coffin contained the full amount.

The other men looked down in embarrassment and the lawyer continued, "Indeed, only I honored the deathbed wishes of our great friend. My envelope contained my personal check for the entire $25,000."

http://www.baseballthinkfactory.org/files/newsstand/discussion/nbc_sports_yanks_fan_allegedly_runs_over_kills_red_sox_fan/

My fondest wish is that were I to pass away and BTF got wind of it (possible
due to my somewhat public profile) there would be (at the minimum) a 500 post
thread full of tasteless one-liners, sick jokes and twisted macabre
humour--the works.

I could think of no finer an epitaph. If anybody complained--just link to
this post.

Best Regards

John

My fondest wish is that were I to pass away and BTF got wind of it (possible due to my somewhat public profile) there would be (at the minimum) a 500 post thread full of tasteless one-liners, sick jokes and twisted macabre humour--the works.

I could think of no finer an epitaph. If anybody complained--just link to this post.

Best Regards

John

Found this on a search. I don't know how to link it without using the whole url.

EDIT: I guess Chris Wok found it before me.

Another thread

Brattain would undoubtedly want to torture as many of us as possible into watching Lyle Overbay together so he could then laugh his ass off because we not only were suckered into that but ALSO paying so much money getting into Scary New Stadium - just because we felt terrible that he was dead.

Then and only then will I pull out the "Toronto stinks worse than John Brattain does now" joke.

No need to plan now, the first one isn't until July, but just to get the thought in everyone's head.

Very sorry to hear the desperate news. Sincere condolences to all of you who had to put up with his puns and bible quotes in person.

John and I once promised to dance on the Bewigged Satan's grave together. Guess that won't be happening. John, you'll just have to haunt the ######.

best regards
philistine

But he'd be the first to remind us that there remains plenty of wit -- he was always amazingly quick to praise anyone who'd made him laugh with a post, after all

Indeed, Sam. Getting a thumbs up from John for something I had written in jest was certainly high praise.

Damn. It says a lot about John that so many people who don't regularly post here came out of the woodwork to express their condolences.

John's groan-worthy posts were a reliable and lovable part of this site, and will be sorely missed. He seemed like a real gentleman, and I was often amazed by his combination of humor, faith, patience, and obsession with baseball. Not to mention his tireless, prolific writing.


Best Regards,

Dave

My fondest wish is that were I to pass away and BTF got wind of it (possible due to my somewhat public profile) there would be (at the minimum) a 500 post thread full of tasteless one-liners, sick jokes and twisted macabre humour--the works.

Since we don't know for sure how John passed, I guess I have to ask . . . has anyone checked on the whereabouts of Ben Christensen?

Unlike most here, I was never the biggest fan of John's work. But he was such an obviously wonderful and genial man. He always made any thread he inhabited more gentlemanly and charming. What a loss.

#193 is pretty amazing.

If he accomplished much, it was by standing on the shoulders of giants... and then peeing into their shirt pockets.

He will be missed.

Best regards,
Vlad

I don't have much to add, other than one more voice to the chorus signing his praises. Like some others here, I never had direct interaction with him but always appreciated his contributions and his wonderful perspective on life. Best regards.

Our loss.

Why did John B cross his heart and hope to die?

To get to the other side.

Seems like those of you in AL-only or mixed leagues without BBTF colleagues will just have to acquire Overbay in your auction/draft by any means necessary.

:)