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Thursday, August 06, 2009

Walkoff Walk: You Can’t Spell Robert Pollard Without Ro(g)er (C)l(emens)

Scalping the guru…

I’m sure there was a time in my life that I knew that. I loved Rog growing up, although I can’t say he was ever more than my 3rd or 4th favorite Red Sock. Still that was the kind of stuff you knew about your team’s ace as a 10 year old. In any case, I’d forgotten it and now when I hear Dayton, Ohio I think Robert Pollard. The Fading Captain is one of my all time favorite dudes and his long and prolific career holds some similarities to the long and prolific career of Mr. Clemens. Both are distinguished and prolific. Both have detractors that say they hung on too long.

Robert Pollard

Over 1,000 songs registered as author on BMI.

Prematurely grey.

Plays for the Boston Spaceships.

Blimps Go 90.

Roger Clemens

4,672 strikeouts

Prematurely blonde.

Played for the Boston Red Sox.

Could probably still hit 90.

...The one major difference is that I still give a damn what Robert Pollard does.

Repoz Posted: August 06, 2009 at 02:31 PM | 53 comment(s) | Login to Bookmark
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1. kirkhead Posted: August 06, 2009 at 02:55 PM (#3282440)

"Look, It's Baseball"

2. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn)

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:01 PM (#3282450)

GBV ... loved that band.

3. Tom Nawrocki Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:03 PM (#3282454)

Pollard was also a pitcher in college, at Wright State. But his only PED was Budweiser.

4. Dock Ellis on Acid

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:10 PM (#3282465)

Top 10 GbV Songs, in no order, today:

Captain's Dead
Everyone Thinks I'm a Raincloud When I'm Not Looking
Over the Neptune/Mesh Gear Fox
It's Like Soul, Man
The different version of Game of Pricks that's on Disc 2 of the Hardcore UFOs box set
Quality of Armor
Do the Earth
I Am A Scientist
Now to War (Electric Version)
Teenage FBI

5. Not The Real Fausto Carmona (Dan Lee) Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:11 PM (#3282467)

Both Pollard and Clemens have thrown no-hitters. It's funny - I can name three Wright State pitchers and they all throw/threw in the high 80s.

(FWIW, I wouldn't know so much about Wright State if my wife wasn't an alumna.)

6. gef the talking mongoose Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:17 PM (#3282470)

Teenage FBI

Great song. Really should've been a band name by now. (Ditto for The Fall's Psycho Mafia, of course -- perhaps the greatest unused gangsta rap name ever.)

Now, if only the execrable Hold on Hope* didn't exist ...

*Undoubtedly the fave GBV song of someone out there; my apologies & condolences.

7. Crispix Attacks Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:19 PM (#3282471)

Wright State, wrong college, as those of us who know UD alums like to say.

Ten favorite GBV songs, right now:

Sot
My Impression Now
Adverse Wind
Blimps Go 90
Ghosts of a Different Dream
Tractor Rape Chain
June Salutes You!
Surgical Focus
Back to the Lake
The Best of Jill Hives

8. SoSH U at work Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:25 PM (#3282482)

Both Pollard and Clemens have thrown no-hitters.

When did Roger throw one?

9. Tom Nawrocki Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:31 PM (#3282506)

*Undoubtedly the fave GBV song of someone out there; my apologies & condolences.

There are probably more GBV songs out there than there are GBV fans, so they can't all be someone's favorite.

"Echos Myron" is the best one, though.

10. Crispix Attacks Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:33 PM (#3282511)

I would be very surprised if "Queen of Second Guessing", "Pimple Zoo", or "Broadcaster House" were anyone's favorite GBV song.

11. Dock Ellis on Acid

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:40 PM (#3282524)

I wonder if Robert Pollard has written more great songs than anyone else.

12. strummer Posted: August 06, 2009 at 03:57 PM (#3282560)

So Tobin Sprout and Mitch Mitchell would be Wade Boggs and Rich Gedman?

13. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn)

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 04:00 PM (#3282564)

My Pollard top 10:

Wished I Was a Giant
Motor Away
Smothered in Hugs
I Am a Scientist
Quality of Armor
Exit Flagger
My Son Cool
Game of Pricks
I'll Replace You with Machines
Tractor Rape Chain

Best title, even though I don't like the song: 14 Cheerleader Cold Front

14. Lassus: Posted: August 06, 2009 at 04:01 PM (#3282568)

GBV ... loved that band.

I never really got on that train. I preferred GvsB.

15. RJ in TO Posted: August 06, 2009 at 04:01 PM (#3282569)

I'll Replace You with Machines

Easily my favorite GBV song.

No, I don't know why.

16. Repoz

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 04:02 PM (#3282573)

Parophaso here...

A stuck in his time zone reporter to Ray Davies of the Kinks...

"Does it bother you that the days of the British Invasion are over and there are no longer any great bands or songwriters around today"

Davies..."Not while Guided by Voices are still around."

Reporter shakes head, checks Whitburn, Shannon, Escott & Hawkins...looses mind staring at gruetled Klinkowstein book cover.

Gives up.

17. Dock Ellis on Acid

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 04:07 PM (#3282583)

Best title, even though I don't like the song: 14 Cheerleader Cold Front

My favorite title is "I Invented the Moonwalk and the Pencil Sharpener."

18. Dock Ellis on Acid

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 06:01 PM (#3282802)

I'm disappointed in you guys. For all the love Pavement gets around here, I expected far more than 17 posts about GbV.

19. jyjjy Posted: August 06, 2009 at 06:25 PM (#3282840)

Hard to pick just 10

Flat Beauty
Choking Tara(Creamy Version)
Game of Pricks
Jar Of Cardinals
If We Wait
Smothered In Hugs
Man Called Aerodynamics
(I Wanna Be A) Dumbcharger
Acorns & Orioles
Cocksoldiers and Their Postwar Stubble

20. JGLB, Future King of a Future State Posted: August 06, 2009 at 07:54 PM (#3282976)

I Am A Scientist
Echos Myron
Everyone Thinks I'm a Raincloud When I'm Not Looking
Love Is Stronger Than Witchcraft
Kicker Of Elves (yeah, not the best song, but it makes it for getting stuck in my head all the damned time)
My Valuable Hunting Knife
Tractor Rape Chain
US Mustard Co
Demons Are Real
Hot Freaks

Bee Thousand really is amazing.

21. Frank McCourt's Gold Stars are in bankruptcy court Posted: August 06, 2009 at 07:57 PM (#3282980)

Ironically, my favorite GBV song is "I am a Scientist."

22. Red Ink Superman Posted: August 06, 2009 at 08:14 PM (#3282997)

I clicked on this expecting all of the comments to be like "who?" but instead I find a bunch of GBV fans. Are we, as GBV fans, more likely to be baseball geeks (or vice versa)? I think this should be studied.

23. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn)

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 08:25 PM (#3283017)

According to the GbV Song Title Generator, my song is, "Bombed the Jigsaw Presence." Not bad, actually.

24. Der Komminsk-sar Posted: August 06, 2009 at 08:26 PM (#3283019)

There's a ton of GBV fans on this site - I too expected way more comments by now.
Put me in the Bee Thousand (which I popped in my car stereo this morning, by chance - yes, I still listen to CDs) is overrated (though really, really good) camp. I prefer the greater consistency of Alien Lanes and Under The Bushes...

Obviously I prefer the mid to late 90s GBV era, with Tobin and Mitch
Does anyone not? Honestly, I don't even like most of Mag Earwhig...

Not sure I have a fave song, but Closer You Are (not mentioned above) would be up there.

Are we, as GBV fans, more likely to be baseball geeks (or vice versa)?
Both, I think.

25. JGLB, Future King of a Future State Posted: August 06, 2009 at 08:27 PM (#3283022)

Sadly, I only got to see GBV in concert once, but it was the greatest concert of my life. It was the second to last show on their farewell tour. At the time I was working a ludicrous schedule (as opposed to the merely ridiculous one I work now) so in order to make the show I had to stay up for 20 hours then drive down to Orlando. The opening acts sucked, but GBV more than made up for it by playing for 3 hours. I lost track of the number of encores. Pollard himself was larger than life, swinging the microphone, chugging whiskey and teuila straight from the bottle and bouncing around like aheated atom. During the show this drunk girl started to get friendly with me and invited me back to her place. Unfortunately, I couldn't take her up on her offer -- I was dead tired (I had to take a nap at a rest stop after I fell asleep at the wheel on the way back), and I had brought my then 16 year old brother to the concert with me. Still, good times.

26. Swedish Chef Posted: August 06, 2009 at 08:31 PM (#3283032)

According to the GbV Song Title Generator, my song is, "Bombed the Jigsaw Presence." Not bad, actually.

"Battling Independent Disease Selector"

Makes way more sense than their real song titles.

27. JGLB, Future King of a Future State Posted: August 06, 2009 at 08:33 PM (#3283035)

"Firm God Hunting Bee", can we be sure that Bob hasn't written a song with that title already?

28. Repoz

Posted: August 06, 2009 at 08:40 PM (#3283050)

BTW...The new Doug Gillard remix of ""From What I've Done" is a friggin' GbVy blast.

Gillard...

29. Eric P. Posted: August 06, 2009 at 09:55 PM (#3283161)

Does anyone not? Honestly, I don't even like most of Mag Earwhig...

Earthquake Glue is right up there with Bee Thousand for me. Not as much variety as the latter but it's just so darn good. Only time Pollard has really nailed a tight, polished studio album.

30. JGLB, Future King of a Future State Posted: August 06, 2009 at 10:29 PM (#3283202)

From A Compound Eye was remarkably tight for a Pollard album.

31. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn)

Posted: August 07, 2009 at 01:01 AM (#3283529)

I should add "Drinker's Peace" to my list. Great song.

32. robinred

Posted: August 07, 2009 at 01:53 AM (#3283599)

Bulldog Skin

33. The District Attorney Posted: August 07, 2009 at 02:10 AM (#3283622)

Choir sings "The Goldheart Mountaintop Queen Directory"

34. Chrysler Town & Country Slaughter (Walewander) Posted: August 07, 2009 at 04:15 AM (#3283749)

Can't believe no one has mentioned Drag Days yet. Another favourite of mine is "Rum Professor" from his Waved Out solo record.

35. Not The Real Fausto Carmona (Dan Lee) Posted: August 07, 2009 at 05:57 AM (#3283763)

When did Roger throw one?

Playing Wiffle Ball with McNamee in his backyard.

Actually it turns out he's never thrown one - not even in high school or little league. I just sort of assumed he had thrown one somewhere at some point. I'm wrong. Carry on.

36. Non-Youkilidian Geometry Posted: August 07, 2009 at 02:22 PM (#3284064)

Playing Wiffle Ball with McNamee in his backyard.

That might work as a Pollard song title.

37. danielj

Posted: August 13, 2009 at 08:58 PM (#3292009)

Death Rattle Fly Disease Beta

I win.

38. vortex of dissipation Posted: August 13, 2009 at 09:05 PM (#3292012)

"Dying Strangled Goblin Batter"

It's even got a baseball connection!

39. Obo Posted: August 13, 2009 at 09:52 PM (#3292040)

"I Can See It in Your Eyes"

40. Gold Star for Robothal Posted: August 13, 2009 at 10:41 PM (#3292059)

Echos Myron
Dayton, Ohio 19 Something and 5
Drinker's Peace
A Salty Salute
Red Gas Circle
Smothered in Hugs
As We Go Up We Go Down
Slick as Snails
Game of Pricks (original only)
Wrinkled Ghost
Shocker in Gloomtown
Glad Girls

41. BarrettsHiddenBall Posted: August 13, 2009 at 10:51 PM (#3292066)

I wonder if Robert Pollard has written more great songs than anyone else.

John Darnielle?

42. Gold Star for Robothal Posted: August 13, 2009 at 11:25 PM (#3292086)

I love GBV, but Pollard's got to get in line after Dylan, Van Zandt, Merle Haggard, Ray Davies and Jagger/Richards.

43. vortex of dissipation Posted: August 13, 2009 at 11:55 PM (#3292101)

I wonder if Robert Pollard has written more great songs than anyone else.

My quite serious nomination for that award would be Richard Thompson. Over 40 years of sustained brilliance...

44. Shredder Posted: August 14, 2009 at 03:08 AM (#3292184)

I only have Alien Lanes, so all of my favorites are from that album. but I think I'm going to download Bee Thousand from emusic. I can't think of too many songs from any bands that I like better than Motor Away and Game of Pricks. I also like Big Boring Wedding, and yeah, I know it's not from either of those albums.

45. Obo Posted: August 14, 2009 at 04:42 AM (#3292199)

If you like Alien Lanes then Bee Thousand is a pretty safe bet, and while I don't think anything on Bee Thousand soars quite like Game of Pricks, to my ear they're similar albums and so if you like one you're going to like the other. I think they're both great.

46. Obi One Kenobi Nil (BFFB)

Posted: August 14, 2009 at 04:56 AM (#3292202)

You can't go wrong with either Bee Thousand or Alien Lanes, both absolutely fantastic albums.

And if you want a conventional length song, play the same one three times over on repeat a la 'The Residents', heh.

47. MM1f Posted: August 14, 2009 at 06:45 AM (#3292209)

I can't possibly name just 10 but I will go against the grain and say that I loved some of the latter day GBV stuff also (Glad Girls, Hold on Hope, Chasing Heather Crazy, Unspirited, The Brides Have Hit Glass, Back to the Lake, Christian Animation Torch Carriers, everywhere with Helicopter, my kind of solider, that I will keep, surgical focus, useless inventions) that probably won't get too many props on this thread.

GBV are kind of like Bad Religion to me. Their early stuff was messy, charming, crazy, unique, fun and great but as they got older they kept the quality up and improved it in many ways (despite losing the charming roughness at the edges) because they are guys that are so naturally gifted at writing freakin catchy songs

As We go up.., Game of Pricks, Teenage FBI (first fav GBV song), I am a tree (does anyone NOT like this song? crazy catchy guitar work), I am a Scientist, Gold star for robot boy, motor away and exit flagger are all favorites among the old school stuff

From A Compound Eye was remarkably tight for a Pollard album.

Agreed.

48. MM1f Posted: August 14, 2009 at 06:50 AM (#3292211)

Ooops. Left off Best of Jill Hives.
Fkking awesome song

49. Phil Coorey, You Won't Posted: August 14, 2009 at 06:57 AM (#3292212)

How the hell did I miss this thread?

50. MM1f Posted: August 14, 2009 at 04:28 PM (#3292466)

Haha. I thought it was a current thread too when I saw it in the Hot Topics bar.
I had no idea it was Dialed from from last week

51. Repoz

Posted: August 14, 2009 at 04:56 PM (#3292498)

I wonder if Robert Pollard has written more great songs than anyone else.

Dean Wells is God on top of being The Capstan Shafts...and he's giving it his best shot!

And you can't beat the titles...

"Beach Delay, or Lighten up, Fuzzhead"
"Recovering Cheerleader, Recovering Greenpeace Canvasser"
"Elected Head of Her Anarchist Group"
"The Icecaps of Mars (Are Just Copying Ours"
"Saddlebags and the Age of Jesus"
"Handstander in an Age of Backflips"

52. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn)

Posted: August 14, 2009 at 04:57 PM (#3292501)

If you like "Alien Lanes," then "Bee Thousand" is definitely a safe bet. Also, "Under the Bushes, Under the Stars" is in that vein.

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Walkoff Walk: You Can’t Spell Robert Pollard Without Ro(g)er (C)l(emens)

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