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Tuesday, July 17, 2012

Mets (46-43) @ Nationals (51-36), Tuesday, July 17, 2012, 7:05pm

NYM:Jonathon Niese (25, LHP, 7-4, 3.73)
WSN:Ross Detwiler (26, LHP, 4-3, 3.43)

The Primer Chimp Posted: July 17, 2012 at 10:00 AM | 166 comment(s)
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   1. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:02 PM (#4185331)
I'm starting to get a bad feeling that Desmond is headed to the D.L.
   2. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:15 PM (#4185336)
Sweeping the Nats is just unlikely enough to happy.

I, in fact, rate it greater in likelihood than me winning the MegaMillions today.
   3. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:16 PM (#4185337)
Er, happen. Talk about a freudian slip.
   4. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:24 PM (#4185349)
THe reliability of Hairston is annoying.

HOLY CRAP BAY IS PLAYING.
   5. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:26 PM (#4185352)
Alderson is going to regret that Bautista decision when he gets his ass lit up.
   6. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:30 PM (#4185353)
All this is doing is making me angrier at Bay.
   7. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:32 PM (#4185356)
Why are we still being subjected to Mike Nickeas?
   8. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:35 PM (#4185358)
Jeez, in a few more weeks every single ad on MASN is probably going to be a ####### Obummer commercial. My remote finger is going to get a great workout over the next three and a half months.
   9. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:36 PM (#4185359)
God, I love Ruben Tejada.
   10. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:44 PM (#4185365)
Ugh. Cedeno. The magic is leaving a lot of these also-rans we've assembled.
   11. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 07:56 PM (#4185384)
Zap! Bless you, inventor of the last channel button, whoever you are.
   12. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:07 PM (#4185398)
I am a terrible person, because I want Nickeas to get injured so he can leave the lineup for an extended period.
   13. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:08 PM (#4185399)
Halfway through the game in an hour. These teams are in a hurry tonight.
   14. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:12 PM (#4185403)
Tyler! Man do we need to get this kid more playing time.
   15. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:12 PM (#4185406)
Whoops. Not much you could do about that, was a good pitch.
   16. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:31 PM (#4185424)
Something Nats and Mets fans alike can be happy about: the red hot Braves are getting the hell beaten out of them tonight.
   17. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:31 PM (#4185425)
Niese looks great, yet it seems we will still lose.
   18. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:32 PM (#4185428)
Lots of offensive ineptitude makes for a fast game.
   19. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:34 PM (#4185433)
Woohoo! That's at least something.

Hairston, you suck.
   20. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:35 PM (#4185435)
Not a good play by Flores.

Come on, let's capitalize, people.
   21. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:37 PM (#4185438)
#### you, Hairston, you ####### meathead ####.
   22. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:40 PM (#4185442)
God, we suck.
   23. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:42 PM (#4185450)
Nice job Detwiler!!
   24. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:42 PM (#4185452)
Unreal. Just like the other night, I blame ############# hairston for swinging at ####### ######## like he's a ####### big man.
   25. The Yankee Clapper Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:51 PM (#4185461)
Braves are getting the hell beaten out of them tonight.

Zito allowing 1 hit through 4 innings.
   26. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:52 PM (#4185463)
I would despair too much, gentlemen (Mets-rooting gentlemen, that is.) The Nats have a nasty tendency of never holding on to these agonizing 1-0 sorts of leads. The normally reliable Burnett-Clippard combo will probably self-destruct tonight. Just you wait.
   27. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:53 PM (#4185464)
Braves are getting the hell beaten out of them tonight.

Zito allowing 1 hit through 4 innings.
The fact that it's Zito who's contributing to their humiliation is just gravy.

Man, Jair Jurrjens, WTF happened to you?
   28. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:55 PM (#4185466)
Nice miserable call, blue.
   29. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:55 PM (#4185467)
Nats radio announcers saying that Torres actually beat that one out, and the Nats got a huge break.
   30. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:55 PM (#4185468)
Yep, that was a big break for us. Bad call.
   31. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:56 PM (#4185469)
The Nats have a nasty tendency of never holding on to these agonizing 1-0 sorts of leads.

Eso, we can outdo whatever suck you throw at us.
   32. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:56 PM (#4185471)
This is what happens when you lose the black hole that is Mike Nickeas.
   33. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:58 PM (#4185475)
It ill be up to Ruben Tejada to save us.
   34. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 08:59 PM (#4185480)
Pathetic, and made worse by the fact that is wasn't even just us causing it there.
   35. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:00 PM (#4185482)
I am truly stunned that Collins didn't even come out of the dugout to argue that. That call could easily be the difference between winning and losing the game.
   36. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:06 PM (#4185487)
Jesus Flores never ended up putting it together, but it would be really nice to have him instead of Nickeas.
   37. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:09 PM (#4185490)
Jesus Flores never ended up putting it together
Don't know if I'd say that at all, unless your standard is "star." He's a perfectly cromulent catcher, an extremely solid pitch-caller, and has been a godsend filling in for Wilson Ramos.

He's also far superior defensively to Ramos. Not very good at throwing runners out, but the passed-ball nightmares of the Ramos Regime are largely a thing of the past, thank god.***



***Hoping I don't jinx myself here.
   38. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:13 PM (#4185493)
Mark DeRosa's extremely unlikely stolen base leads to the Nationals' extremely unlikely insurance run!
   39. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:13 PM (#4185494)
That's a nice insurance policy right there.
   40. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:13 PM (#4185495)
See, Eso?
   41. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:13 PM (#4185496)
I would be much less annoyed by that run if Collins hadn't gone through the obviously doomed attempt to the get platoon advantage first.
   42. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:16 PM (#4185499)
Prediction: Solo HR by Wright. And that's it.
   43. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:17 PM (#4185501)
Positives out of this game: Collins realizing a lefty against a lefty is still a better bet than Mike ####### Nickeas. Because it's going to have to be about the small victories.
   44. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:17 PM (#4185502)
Don't know if I'd say that at all, unless your standard is "star." He's a perfectly cromulent catcher, an extremely solid pitch-caller, and has been a godsend filling in for Wilson Ramos.


I wouldn't say star, but in 2008-09 I definitely thought he'd become a top 10-15 catcher (as an overall player) in baseball. Now he's one of the better backup catchers in the game.
   45. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:18 PM (#4185503)
Uh-oh. Here we go...
   46. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:18 PM (#4185504)
Life! Yay Josh Thole!
   47. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:19 PM (#4185505)
Wright does look a little lost lately.
   48. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:19 PM (#4185507)
What would I have to sell to the Devil in order to get a GIDP here?
   49. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:19 PM (#4185508)
I feel like Clippard is a good matchup for David.
   50. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:19 PM (#4185509)
Maybe Wright will get one and Hairston will hit into a triple play.
   51. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:20 PM (#4185510)
I do like Clippard's glasses.
   52. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:20 PM (#4185511)
Oh crap, I just realized: ANGEL HERNANDEZ IS CALLING BALLS AND STRIKES.

We're doomed.
   53. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:21 PM (#4185512)
See, this is *EXACTLY* what I knew would happen. We're boned.
   54. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:21 PM (#4185513)
OK, Hairston, now's your chance to REALLY #### it up.
   55. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:21 PM (#4185514)
Scott Hairston will hit a freak three-run homer. Mark it.
   56. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:22 PM (#4185515)
Eso, that was a ball. Come on.
   57. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:22 PM (#4185516)
Well, Hairston does have power. He just sucks.
   58. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:22 PM (#4185517)
Is Duda still out?
   59. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:23 PM (#4185518)
0-2 with two swinging strikes on Hairston. How will it go wrong for us now?
   60. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:23 PM (#4185519)
Hey, see if you can swing at one that goes over the ump's head, big man! You can do it!
   61. Dog on the sidewalk Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:23 PM (#4185520)
Hit for Hairston!
   62. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:23 PM (#4185521)
Is Duda still out?

Cortisone shot.
   63. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:25 PM (#4185522)
HEART. IN MOUTH. GASPING. PLEASE DON'T F**K THIS UP.
   64. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:25 PM (#4185523)
Well, it wasn't a DP.

Sit the #### down, you loser.
   65. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:26 PM (#4185524)
Why don't we all swing for, oh, let's say Wyoming.
   66. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:27 PM (#4185525)
Strike 2 looked really low.
   67. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:27 PM (#4185526)
Angel helping you there, Eso.
   68. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:27 PM (#4185527)
Now THAT'S a patented Angel Hernandez Strike right there.
   69. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:28 PM (#4185530)
JESUS GOD DIE DIE DIE DIE DIE
   70. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:28 PM (#4185531)
WHOOOOOOOOOOOO
   71. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:28 PM (#4185533)
MY NEGATIVITY IS REWARDED!

I hope.

Replay still might happen.
   72. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:29 PM (#4185534)
I TOLD YOU.
   73. Yonder Alonso in misguided trousers (cardinal) Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:29 PM (#4185535)
Whoa... I turn away from the game for a few minutes and look what happens. I should pay less attention more.
   74. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:29 PM (#4185536)
I'm pretty sure replay will uphold that one. It was on the way out.
   75. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:30 PM (#4185537)
I want to vomit.
   76. Dog on the sidewalk Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:30 PM (#4185538)
Jordanny Valdespin is a clutch god.
   77. Dog on the sidewalk Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:31 PM (#4185539)
You're all about a minute ahead of me, but that looks like a home run to me.
   78. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:32 PM (#4185541)
I want to vomit.

7. Lassus Posted: July 14, 2012 at 07:29 PM (#4182587)

I feel like I'm going to throw up.



WELCOME!
   79. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:32 PM (#4185542)
Don't give up guys, it's not over yet.
   80. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:34 PM (#4185544)
Don't give up guys, it's not over yet.
Oh, it's over.
   81. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:35 PM (#4185545)
Maybe I should go back to rooting for just the Mariners.
   82. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:36 PM (#4185546)
Maybe I should join a monastery and forsake earthly things altogether, in fact.
   83. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:36 PM (#4185547)
No it's not. The Mets don't have a dependable closer right now.
   84. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:36 PM (#4185548)
Oh Eso, yor'e still in first place, I KINDA THINK.

Also, this is the Mets. Joey's right, it's not over.
   85. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:39 PM (#4185549)
Bob Carpenter totally blew the call on that one.
   86. Dog on the sidewalk Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:39 PM (#4185550)
Joey's right

I'm going to remember that you said this, Lassus,
   87. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:43 PM (#4185552)
Oh dear.
   88. Zeba Zeba Eata Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:44 PM (#4185554)
Crapola
   89. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:44 PM (#4185555)
GOD PARNELL WHY DO YOU SUCK SO BAD
   90. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:45 PM (#4185556)
No, we're doomed. It's over. Nats will lose, and then finish in last place.

(Psssst...I'm trying some of this "Lassus negativity" to see how it works...)
   91. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:45 PM (#4185557)
I'm going to remember that you said this, Lassus,

It's ok, because even if we lose the game, Joey still lost at his attempt at a political hijack.
   92. JJ1986 Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:46 PM (#4185558)
One more breaking ball, please.
   93. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:46 PM (#4185559)
We're really boned now. Espinosa is a guaranteed strikeout.
   94. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:47 PM (#4185561)
Big out.

Please, baseball gods, pretty please?
   95. Zeba Zeba Eata Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:47 PM (#4185562)
Crvblls 4 teh win
   96. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:51 PM (#4185566)
This is where I wish pitchers would work faster, just keep the hitters off-balance.

And, that happened.

Parnell, you are really no good.
   97. Joey B. is being stalked by a (Gonfa) loon Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:51 PM (#4185567)
Told you Eso!!
   98. Zeba Zeba Eata Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:51 PM (#4185568)
Fcuk
   99. Esoteric Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:51 PM (#4185570)
Please, baseball gods, pretty please?
Don't you know your Jim Morrison, Lassus? YOU CANNOT PETITION THE LORD WITH PRAYER!
   100. Lassus Posted: July 17, 2012 at 09:52 PM (#4185571)
Don't you know your Jim Morrison, Lassus? YOU CANNOT PETITION THE LORD WITH PRAYER!

I'm an atheist. I only believe in pagan baseball gods, like Benny Agbayani.
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