I really wanted to hate this song, but listening to it, I have to admit it's not as horrendous as I thought it would be.

Yeah, that was actually pretty good. Kinda Guided By Voices-ish.

Kinda Guided By Voices-ish.

Yes...the riff is very similar to "Catastrophic Aluminum Huffy Stinkseat"

Yes...the riff is very similar to "Catastrophic Aluminum Huffy Stinkseat"

####, man, I don't even know if you're trying to be funny or not!

That's not bad. Could be drunkenly sung in a bar.

In the spirit of the Super Bowl Shuffle (which has been stuck in my head all week):

We are the Oakland A's
we win in mysterious ways

The media said we won't play this fall
we just screamed "Moneyball" ("MONEYBALL")

Yo my name is Josh Reddick
and I make every Sox fan sick

Don't be bummed that you're out of Quisp
come and get some Coco Crisp

Don't sit home scratching your [HONK]
Come on out and watch Yoenis

Rolling stones gather no Moss
but Chris Carter doesn't give a toss

London may have Sherlock Holmes
ain't no worry, we got Smith and Gomes

Stuck at home again watching "Logan's Run"?
You've never seen Josh Donaldson!

Something borrowed, something blue,
now it's green and gold, I'm Stephen Drew!

Look at these jeans hug my fat ass,
ladies and gents I'm George Kottaras

Now the man, the Grand, the Master man
Throw the dice so precise we don't need no fans
He rocks Rule 5 and the winter meet-een
He's the one and only Billy Beane [BILLY BEANE! BILLY BEANE!]

I love #6, particularly because at least four of the names have to be mispronounced just to fit those terrible rhymes.

Still not as good as "Piazza, New York Catcher."

C'mon man, cut me some slack. First I'm white. Second, I'm about as white as you can get without being wealthy. Third, I've been living in New Zealand and Australia for the last 7+ years. And I still managed to fit in [HONK] (true, this does not rhyme with any pronunciation of Yoenis), Sherlock Holmes, Logan's Run, Quisp -- the greatest cereal in the history of the world -- and an hommage to Flash.

And it's not my fault Donaldson pronounces his name Thrope Warbler Mangrove.

I'm the Cuban slugger, your foe Yoenis.
When I hit the field, you know I'm a menace.
Hit after hit, man of the hour
Rockin' your mom with my core power
Hats for bats, keep bats warm
October is when I was born to perform
You know how you'll end this tourney
Watchin' me and Coco dance the Bernie.

Hey what's up fans, it's Brandon Moss
But you can just call me the fandom boss
When I came here we were in third place
But now we're on top of the pennant race
On the Pirates I was worse than Delwyn Young
But here in Oakland I'm gettin' it done
It don't matter what y'all done heard
We'll be doin' the Bernie on November 3rd

Yo my name's Seth Smith and I like to hit,
And I must admit, I miss Coors a little bit,
But it's all right and it's okay,
Because I'll take the bay weather any day.

And I'm Jonny Gomes, Seth's partner in rhyme,
Doctors say my heart might stop at any time,
But until that day, I'll just smack the ball,
And tell Albert Pujols, "maybe next fall!"

Rockin' your mom with my core power

I found this line unreasonably funny.
New sig for SOMEbody, I reckon.

It's Jerry Blevins, reliever supreme
They call me a LOOGY, I don't know what they mean!
I've been in Oakland for quite a while
Punching out lefties and settin' the style

I'm Sean [I'm Jordan], we're lefties too
Anything Jerry does we can do
[You'd better score early when you come to this town]
'Cause in the seventh and eighth we'll shut you down

G'day there mates, got room for one more?
I'm the Aussie assassin, Grant Balfour
I won the league once with the Tampa Bay Rays
Now I'm lairing it up with the Oakland A's

Bludgers said we were the worst team in the world
Now we're screamin' and shoutin' and chasin' girls
I'll be giving your sheila the eye today
Even if your name's Kila Ka'aihue

Good stuff.

Come on, folks. We need more verses for the Bernie Lean Shuffle.