the first sporting event of 2013 that I watched was a soccer match.

You poor, sick b@stard.

Let's put this here:
I've decamped from the arctic regions to Alicante for a little while to avoid being eaten by polar bears. Alicante's local heroes Hercules are last in the second division and won't have a home game while I'm here anyway, but their rivals from just up the road, Elche, has one this weekend. They're dominating the second division in some style, 8 points up on the second place team. Seems like a good bandwagon to jump on.

You poor, sick b@stard.

You seem to be commenting in the wrong place, Youtube is that way ---->

I remember all the palm trees there. Must be a great place to be in the winter. Going to see the castle?

You seem to be commenting in the wrong place, Youtube is that way ---->

When I read this, the arrow happened to be pointing at the politics thread in the sidebar. Heh.

I remember all the palm trees there. Must be a great place to be in the winter. Going to see the castle?

The castle is dominating the view from my hotel room, I have to go up there, should be a great view if nothing else.

Whoa! Someone else posted the soccer thread! Tremendous.

It was a great view. Spent a big part of my honeymoon in Altea. Went to Alicante a couple of times to sight see and for the restaurants.

Once again, the person writing the Tottenham match report for ESPN.com appears to have been watching some other game.

Despite a generally decent performance in which they had Spurs on the rack before Michael Dawson's equaliser and for extended periods after it, [Reading] ultimately lacked the quality to get a result.

Possession: Spurs 68% / Reading 32%
Shots: Spurs 34 / Reading 7
Shots on Target: Spurs 11 / Reading 2
Source: whoscored.com

Yes there's more to the story of the game than a handful of stats, but seriously...what the hell game was this correspondent watching? Reading scored off a set piece (courtesy of a Pogrebnyak dive*, incidentally) following the first of perhaps two serious attacking moves they managed in the entire first half. It wasn't against the run of play, as neither team was able to string much of anything together in those first few minutes, but it certainly wasn't part of any sustained pressure from Reading either.

Spurs were pretty much immediately camped in Reading's half after that, scored the equalizer, and remained camped there for about an hour, somehow scoring just once more. Reading then had at most five minutes where they generated some golden chances to equalize themselves, ably assisted by some bumbling defensive work by Spurs. After that, Tottenham settled down again, Dempsey's deflected shot looped in, and that was that. If Reading had Spurs "on the rack...for extended periods", then I must have blacked out in ecstasy for 20 minutes or so after Adebayor scored.

* Howard Webb gets a lot of stick, especially from Spurs fans, some of it deserved and some of it not. That decision to award Reading a free kick for Pogrebnyak going over Naughton's outstretched leg after the defender had cleanly poked the ball away was the first of many, shall we say, puzzling decisions on the day. I think Webb works hard and is generally quite decent as a referee, but he was laughably bad today.

Yeah, Reading only had the upper hand for about a 5 minute stretch in the second half. I'm starting to think ESPN doesn't even watch the games. Aaron Lennon was sensational for Spurs yesterday. Lucky for him Hodgson was checking the game out. In the other games I watched...Berbatov was fantastic again. Interestingly enough he seems to have taken on the role of manager on the pitch--he spends a lot of time barking at his teammates about where they should be positioned, when they should be passing, etc. That signing could not have worked out better for Fulham. Man U were exceptional, damn them to hell. Wigan weren't poor, but they just couldn't match Man U's quality. And finally, Arsenal were really outplayed by Southampton yesterday and the Saints were very unlucky not to get the win. I think the Gervinho experience at Arsenal is just about over and I'm not surprised Arsenal are in talks to sign Adriano. Aaron Ramsey, when he came on, and Djourou were pretty terrible for Arsenal, too. The bad news for Spurs is they put a stinker like that in just as the window opens and now they'll feel pressure to strengthen.

Anyone have a scouting report on Lewis Holtby? He's the flavor of the day for Spurs rumors. He's going to be available on a free this summer and he has ties to Steffen Freiund from the German youth set up.

Holtby sounds like a passing midfielder for a theoretical 4-3-3, from the accounts I've read. No idea if he's actually good enough at that to start for Spurs, but he's the right kind of acquisition for them.

I don't really know where Arsenal need to improve, exactly. (The report I read is that Arsenal were looking to sign Adrian Lopez, not Adriano.) Is a striker really what they need? Giroud seems perfectly cromulent, Podolski can play, and Walcott's been quite solid most of the time up top. Obviously if Lopez, whom I know nothing about, is a world-class talent, then he'd be a good add because those kinds of players are always good to have, but if he's just about another solid striker, that doesn't seem like the answer. I watch Arsenal play and it seems like they're a really good side that's consistently really good in pretty much all the attacking and midfield positions. They could really use some better defenders, and some depth so that they never have to play Gervinho again. Striker seems like the place they need depth the least.

I guess, from Wenger's deployment of Giroud, he may disagree with me about the man's cromulence. If people at Arsenal think Giroud is part of the problem, then they indeed need depth up top. That seems like a terribly quick turnaround on a £13M purchase of a player who was hardly an unknown quantity, but hey, if he sucks then he sucks. (I don't think he sucks.)

I don't really know where Arsenal need to improve, exactly

They should try to get van Persie, he looks like a perfect fit for them.

I guess, from Wenger's deployment of Giroud, he may disagree with me about the man's cromulence. If people at Arsenal think Giroud is part of the problem, then they indeed need depth up top. That seems like a terribly quick turnaround on a £13M purchase of a player who was hardly an unknown quantity, but hey, if he sucks then he sucks. (I don't think he sucks.)

I think Giroud is just ok. I really think Steven Fletcher would score as many goals leading the line for Arsenal as Giroud and I get the feeling Arsenal signed him because he had a release clause so his cost was a known quantity and arguably below market value. I think you're right about Adrian Lopez. I got my Adrian-based names confused.

Holtby is small, but reasonably talented (as one would expect of a German trained midfielder).

He hasn't been able to stick with Schalke, which would lead me to conclude that he would be at best a squad option for Tottenham. I'd also be a bit concerned about his ability to deal with the physicality of the English game.

Transfer,art has him valued at about 10 million euro, which strikes me as high (though he does have clear sell on value).

He supports Everton, should that mean anything.

Holtby is small, but reasonably talented (as one would expect of a German trained midfielder).

He hasn't been able to stick with Schalke, which would lead me to conclude that he would be at best a squad option for Tottenham. I'd also be a bit concerned about his ability to deal with the physicality of the English game.

Doesn't sound like anything to get worked up about, then.

The bad news: Demba Ba is headed to Chelsea. The good news: That means Falcao isn't. I actually don't think this is a disaster for Newcastle as they can make Cisse the focus again and use the cash to bring in a defensive player. That, along with Debuchy, and I think they'll be fine. If Man City are going to dump Lescott, Newcastle makes all kinds of sense, no?

Some other transfer news:

Derek Boateng heading to Fulham
Newcastle are looking at Peter Odemwingie to replace Ba
Borussia Dortmund are interested in bringing back Nuri Sahin, which would be hilarious but kind of great, too
Pato is heading back to Brazil to play for Corinthians
Sadly, no David Bentley news, yet. I will keep you informed.

What's the deal with Chelsea solving their problems with creativity and clever dealings? They filled the defensive midfield hole internally by converting David Luiz, and now they're getting a high quality striker at a (relative) budget price. Is that Benitez?

What's the deal with Chelsea solving their problems with creativity and clever dealings? They filled the defensive midfield hole internally by converting David Luiz, and now they're getting a high quality striker at a (relative) budget price. Is that Benitez?

Maybe FFP is a thing? We shall see. Wigan is now in the black so at least they're taking it seriously.

Sturridge to Liverpool is official.

and now they're getting a high quality striker at a (relative) budget price.

With knee problems.

And ridiculous personal terms (including multiple agents with their hands out).

I'm increasingly of the view that one needs to look at the all-in cost of new signings, rather than focusing on transfer fees alone.

I'm increasingly of the view that one needs to look at the all-in cost of new signings, rather than focusing on transfer fees alone.

I completely agree but the reporting on wages/fees in soccer is terrible compared to American sports. The agent fees in soccer seems absolutely crazy to me, as well, but everyone seems content with the system so, what the hell.

What's the deal with Chelsea solving their problems with creativity and clever dealings? They filled the defensive midfield hole internally by converting David Luiz, and now they're getting a high quality striker at a (relative) budget price. Is that Benitez?

Maybe FFP is a thing? We shall see. Wigan is now in the black so at least they're taking it seriously.

I do think that its FFP. You saw this with a very high, but unsuccessful bid for BatterSea Power Station (which would have increased revenue eventually) and the ever increased desperation to turn Torres into a productive striker. I do think that its likely that there will be spurge for a top-shelf striker in the summer, but that will also likely be on the heels of removing Lampard, Cole and possibly even Torres from their wage bill.

Liverpool, I hope you enjoy your new derpy, delusional forward!!!

All very true.

One can only hope that FFP will have a beneficial effect on this over time, but it will be a slow process at best.

I don't really know where Arsenal need to improve, exactly. (The report I read is that Arsenal were looking to sign Adrian Lopez, not Adriano.) Is a striker really what they need?

Not sure what you're counting as a striker but I think Adrian also plays out as one of the wide forwards in a 4-3-3. If he can take playing time away from Ramsey and Gervinho in those roles, I think that would be a big help.

Edit: although...that leads one to wonder why he's out of favor this season.

I'm increasingly of the view that one needs to look at the all-in cost of new signings, rather than focusing on transfer fees alone.

This is the thing about purportedly serious football reporting that continues to most drive me bonkers. The oversimplified accounting that this club sold this and that player for £X and £Y so they must now have £X+Y to invest in the squad (or else they're cheapskates!), blah blah blah, with little to no acknowledgement of all the other parts of the transactions. You see this all the time, even by otherwise intelligent reporters and bloggers who should know better.

It's true that information on the all-in cost seems to be sketchy or secretive, but I don't know enough to guess whether that's down to different accounting rules in Europe versus the US (I know some clubs operate as PLCs and are, I think, therefore obliged to disclose some information about transfers above a certain threshold value), a lack of motivated inquiry on the part of the press, a lack of interest on the part of the public, or what have you.

Alright, rant over.

Jonathan Wilson writes QPR's obituary.

They're doomed. Fernandes would be silly to spend any more money on them this season, but then, his conception of ashtray money is a little different than mine...

It's easy to find out the official figures for how much money goes to agents*:

Spending on agent fees in 2011-12

*) Moneys delivered to 'Arry in a thick brown envelope not included.

Boy, I love Ba when he was a Hammer, I was sorry to see him go. I'm so rarely on the ball with these things, I feel like I have to point it out when it happens.

QPR appears to be an absolute ########### these days. That's one down, two to go!

I suppose you could divide the total by the number of transfers a club made during the period in question, but I doubt the distribution is so even. The data would need to be specific to each player transaction to be really useful.

Boy, I love Ba when he was a Hammer, I was sorry to see him go. I'm so rarely on the ball with these things, I feel like I have to point it out when it happens.

What are your thoughts on reuniting with Joe Cole?

I suppose you could divide the total by the number of transfers a club made during the period in question, but I doubt the distribution is so even. The data would need to be specific to each player transaction to be really useful.

I find it so bizarre that clubs pay agents anything at all. Just imagine Boras finishing up a contract for a client and then asking Brian Cashman, "OK, now let's talk about my fee..."

What are your thoughts on reuniting with Joe Cole?

'Arry says 'ands off!

Along with QPR, I don't see how Reading can stay up. They are the worst in the league by component stats - shots on target, etc. They've improved a little by parking the bus every week since Arsenal shellacked them, but they've done so at the expense of any attacking capacity. Also their players are bad.

The third relegation spot, though, I have no idea.

I suppose you could divide the total by the number of transfers a club made during the period in question, but I doubt the distribution is so even. The data would need to be specific to each player transaction to be really useful.

I think it says something as a percentage of transfer fees. But agents are not only paid for completed signings. Clubs pay agents to get rid of players too, and for extensions, or for finder's fees. Or as middle-men. Some are kept on retainers, Raiola got €3M from Barca annually until he called Guardiola mentally ill in the press.

Maybe the thing to do is to subtract the average spent on that transfer volume and see the rest as an indication how deep into the agent game the club is.

One thing the list says definitely is that being a top agent is a nice racket.

The third relegation spot, though, I have no idea.

As a neutral, I hope there are 5 teams involved for that last spot on the last day. I'm hoping for something close to the madness we had on the last day last May. I can't even wager a guess as to the third relegated club. My gut is that it will be Southampton as Villa will bring in reinforcements and I'm tired of Wigan making me look foolish so I refuse to pick them anymore.

My gut is that it will be Southampton as Villa will bring in reinforcements and I'm tired of Wigan making me look foolish so I refuse to pick them anymore.

My gut's in the same place. Also, I really like Paul Lambert and don't want to see him get relegated.

The third relegation spot, though, I have no idea.

I'm seriously worried for Aston Villa. They can't score and they can't defend. Either one of those problems usually spells a season of struggling in the bottom half of the table. The combination of both is almost always the kiss of death. When it comes to the relegation dogfight, I think Villa's going to be relying on Wigan and Soton being slightly worse than them as much as anything else.

I'm seriously worried for Aston Villa. They can't score and they can't defend. Either one of those problems usually spells a season of struggling in the bottom half of the table. The combination of both is almost always the kiss of death. When it comes to the relegation dogfight, I think Villa's going to be relying on Wigan and Soton being slightly worse than them as much as anything else.

As currently constructed, yeah, they're not looking good which is why I can't even commit to Southampton as the team I think is going down. I have confidence that Lambert will figure things out and that Lerner will let him spend just enough cash to improve the team.

I find it so bizarre that clubs pay agents anything at all. Just imagine Boras finishing up a contract for a client and then asking Brian Cashman, "OK, now let's talk about my fee..."

Well, the players seldom pay the agents anything directly for their services, and the agents have to feed their families in some way. As for conflicts of interest, that can't happen as the only interest the agents have is enrichening themselves.

Holtby is small, but reasonably talented (as one would expect of a German trained midfielder).

He hasn't been able to stick with Schalke, which would lead me to conclude that he would be at best a squad option for Tottenham. I'd also be a bit concerned about his ability to deal with the physicality of the English game.

So what you're saying is he's the next Luka Modric, right?

I think I've seen Holtby play at most twice, so I don't have too much of a read on him. He didn't really grab my eye for good or bad. At first blush, I'd say he'd be a good pickup as a squad player. Spurs have an open spot on the 25-man with the departure of Cudicini, and a technically sound midfielder who's more dynamic and flexible than Tom Huddlestone or Jake Livermore would be a very reasonable way to fill that spot. Spurs could use a player like that if Villas-Boas doesn't have full confidence in Tom Carroll for league games yet (which it appears he doesn't).

Spurs could use a player like that if Villas-Boas doesn't have full confidence in Tom Carroll for league games yet (which it appears he doesn't).

A loan deal of Carroll to Villa makes a lot of sense. I think he could really help them settle games down and he needs the first team action. And speaking of Spurs players and loans, it looks like Adam Smith might be moving to the PL from Millwall. He appears to be on the Kyle Walker career trajectory which is good for me as I'll be able to break out all kinds of economics puns when he makes it to the first team. Oh yeah, and supposedly Reading is the favorite for a Thudd loan.

What are your thoughts on reuniting with Joe Cole?

Assuming the 'Ammers beat out 'Arry, I'm not that taken with the move. It seems to me what the team really needs is a striker, even if you assume that Carroll will at some point be fit enough for real matchplay.

Speaking of 'Arry, did you see he decided today would be an excellent time to proclaim that "you'd have to be a real dope to mess it up" at Chelsea? Stay classy, 'Arry.

I'm seriously worried for Aston Villa. They can't score and they can't defend.

Agreed. On the scoring end, I know it's extremely unlikely but it'd be interesting/great if Drogba could somehow come in. Villa need experience along with skill, and Drogba is all of that (and a gigantic salary, even for Lerner...but still...).

On defense, the dearth of quality defenders, regardless of salary/agent demands, has just about everyone stuck with what they've got. Even the MUFCs of the world. Juve, for instance, could really use a injury replacement for Chiellini, but who would they get?

It wouldn't be a window without...

A Spurs link to Leandro Damiao. Tim Vickery on the longest transfer saga of all time at the end of the clip. He seems to think the player wants the move, Spurs want him, Inter wants to sell him but 3rd party owners are complicating things. Hopefully with Chelsea and Liverpool already bringing in strikers and Arsenal linked with Adrian Lopez, Damiao's 3rd party owners will give up the pipe dream of a massive pay day and settle for a really good one.

Speaking of 'Arry, did you see he decided today would be an excellent time to proclaim that "you'd have to be a real dope to mess it up" at Chelsea? Stay classy, 'Arry.

I did. That was classic 'Arry--take a swipe at Benitez and AVB and set up an excuse for losing the game all in one pithy soundbite. That is triffic stuff!

Twitter justifies its existence.

Agreed. On the scoring end, I know it's extremely unlikely but it'd be interesting/great if Drogba could somehow come in. Villa need experience along with skill, and Drogba is all of that (and a gigantic salary, even for Lerner...but still...).

The one outfield player with any real class on Villa is Benteke, who is a true #9. Their midfield and defense are pretty much the definition of replacement level in the EPL. If they're going to buy - and they really should buy - it should be basically anyone but a traditional #9.

The one outfield player with any real class on Villa is Benteke, who is a true #9. Their midfield and defense are pretty much the definition of replacement level in the EPL. If they're going to buy - and they really should buy - it should be basically anyone but a traditional #9.

Agbonlahor is a solid player and should be back from injury soon. That will help. Ireland is the real enigma for them and Lambert has had as little success as anyone else getting any consistency from him. On his day I think he's their best player, though, which is probably indicative of how deep their problems are.