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    • Thursday, May 09, 2013

    Former Cardinals OF Fernando Tatís Is Good at MS Paint… No, Really

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    posted 2 weeks ago by jyjjy to cardinals  |  52 comment(s)

    Former Cardinals outfielder Fernando Tatís once famously hit 2 Grand Slams in one inning and set a Major Leage record with 8 RBI in one frame but that may not be his biggest feat. Lately it seems that Fernando has been lighting up the world of graphic design and his all original creations are truly a sight to behold and the world needs to stand up and take notice.

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    1. bunyon posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:02 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    Yeah, 2006 was the year they stopped being a team that won lots of games in the regular season and were clearly very, very good and started being the guys that would just hang around, slip into the playoffs somehow and then go on a run while all the talking heads spoke on and on about how they "just knew how to win".

    Yeah? Well then why don't they do it as much as everyone else?


    I've pointed this out a few times: if the Tigers and Cards go to the world series, ten teams with better 2012 records will be home watching on TV. They're records are 11th and 12th. So, in the top half, at least. But barely.


    EDIT: So, I don't actually HATE the Cardinals. Had they won their division or won 93 or 94 games or something (the latter being better, IMO), I'd be perfectly fine with them. There is nothing wrong with the Cardinals. There is something wrong with naming as champion someone who was barely better than average most of the year.
    2. Anonymous Observer posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:02 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    This will be a fun thread to read once all of the Cardinals haters have their say. I can't wait!
    3. Esoteric throws a 'hard slider' posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:06 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    Definitely 2006. But it wasn't really hatred then, it was mere disdain, with the inchoate sense of dread that comes from realizing that, like a Halloween or Friday The 13th flick, the Cards were going to keep doing this, again and again and again.

    Then Friday happened.

    Now I want them dead, I want their families dead, I want their houses burned to the ground, Untouchables-style.
    4. JJ1986 posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:08 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    5. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:10 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    The question is false. We have always been at war with Eurasia.
    6. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:13 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    More in the spirit of the game, I think I realized exactly how despicable these Cards were when Yadi Molina got sand in his vagina, started a fight with Brandon Phillips in which Chris Carpenter lost his #### and turned it into a serious event, and then Cards nation had the wherewithal to ##### and moan about Johnny Cueto trying to defend himself.
    7. AROM posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:19 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    We have always been at war with Eurasia.


    That pretty much sums up the whole premise here. A few days ago the rest of the world wasn't "cheering for the young, likable, fiery Washington Nationals". The Nationals were hated because how dare they not give Strasburg the ball for the playoffs.

    For me, I can't work up enough hate or love for any of the remaining teams to really care about what's left of the postseason. I'm sure there will still be some good games.
    8. Jose Can Still Seabiscuit posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:20 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I like the Cardinals. I liked them as a kid with McGee, Ozzie, Herr, Clark etc...and I still like them. They always seem to play the game right in the sense that they are fundamentally sound and they seem to have fun with it.
    9. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:22 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    They always seem to play the game right in the sense that they are fundamentally sound and they seem to have fun with it.


    This is a good reason to hate the Cardinals. People who say #### like this about them.
    10. The Chronicles of Reddick posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:25 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I wonder if Pujols is enjoying the off-season knowing that his old team is making another run at the World Series?
    11. Srul Itza posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:28 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I have hated them since the Whitey Herzog years. The last time I didn't hate them, Bob Gibson was still pitching for them -- and I still rooted for the Tigers in '68.

    12. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:31 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I wonder if Pujols is enjoying the off-season knowing that his old team is making another run at the World Series?


    Shitstained self-entitlement. A complete failure to recognize the brute, random ######## that has simply bounced the franchise's way the last few seasons. The becoming-Yankees-fans of the self-righteous "best fans in baseball."

    The question isn't "why hate them." It's why would you not?
    13. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:31 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I liked the Cards of the '80s just fine, but as with so many people, LaRussa and his flexible ethics and perpetual outrage machine pretty much killed that. I think the game that turned me against them for good was the one where Julian Tavarez got caught doctoring the ball, and he threw his cap into the stands so the ump couldn't check it, and then LaRussa got all huffy about his suspension and tried to claim that he'd just been giving a souvenir to a fan. ########! ######## bullshit ########!!!
    14. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:34 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    There's also the fact that you're the new Marlins, winning "Championships" you don't deserve. So you have that too.
    15. Guts  posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:39 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    winning "Championships" you don't deserve

    This is outstanding.
    16. Yeaarrgghhhh posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:43 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I lived in St. Louis when I was a kid, and liked the Herzog Cardinals, but I've definitely turned into a hater over the last few years. There was no defining moment -- the irritation just built up over time.
    17. Smiling Joe Hesketh posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:43 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I get very tired of hearing what a great baseball town St. Louis is. Downtown St. Louis is a depressing dump.
    18. The Id of SugarBear Blanks  posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:46 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    The question isn't "why hate them." It's why would you not?

    The Cardinals have become a unique blight on American sports, an admixture of head lice, herpes, and leprosy. Their postseason accomplishments are random and silly and Exhibit A against Bud's ridiculous "One Moment in Time" postseason. If baseball was still structured properly, they would have finished 10 games out and be counting down the days until spring training 2013.
    19. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:46 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I get very tired of hearing what a great baseball town St. Louis is


    Yep. It's like hearing about "True Yankee fans," only the Yankees actually won something, whereas the Cards are just this decade's model of the Marlins.
    20. Joey B. has ignited his October #Natitude posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:46 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I wonder if Pujols is enjoying the off-season knowing that his old team is making another run at the World Series?

    And if the Cardinals do win it all, then will you guys get over it?

    The more comments like this you guys make, the more obvious it becomes to everyone how absurd the Joe Buckian myths about Cardinals fans are.
    21. Sleepy supports unauthorized rambling posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:48 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    EDIT: So, I don't actually HATE the Cardinals. Had they won their division or won 93 or 94 games or something (the latter being better, IMO), I'd be perfectly fine with them. There is nothing wrong with the Cardinals. There is something wrong with naming as champion someone who was barely better than average most of the year.


    Kind of disingenuous to call them "barely better than average". They had a 93-69 pythag (second best in league; giants 88-74, ATL 92-70, CIN 91-71, WSN 96-76) and they didn't have Chris Carpenter most of the year, or Miller or Rosenthal in the bullpen. This is a team that lost it's starting SS & starting 1B to injury (and backup 1B, for a month), and still led the NL in runs scored for most of the year, playing in an extreme pitcher's park, and finished second in R/G but with the highest team OBP and OPS+ (and a 104 ERA+).
    22. Greg (U)K posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:50 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    For me, I can't work up enough hate or love for any of the remaining teams to really care about what's left of the postseason. I'm sure there will still be some good games.

    This is me. Last weekend was tragic. I suppose I can muster up the energy to root against the Yankees in an abstract sort of sense (but not enough to actually watch the games), and a good friend of mine is a Giants fan so I guess I could be happy for him if they win again.

    But in two days I went from...."ooooh look at all these interesting teams in the playoffs!" to "perhaps this new computer game will give me something to pass the time".
    23. cardsfanboy  posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:50 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    Yeah, 2006 was the year they stopped being a team that won lots of games in the regular season and were clearly very, very good and started being the guys that would just hang around, slip into the playoffs somehow and then go on a run while all the talking heads spoke on and on about how they "just knew how to win".


    2006 was the year that they stopped caring what their final season record was going to be with about three weeks left in the season and ended up going from the 2nd best record in the NL to the poor record they ended up with. I'm not sure what "knew how to win" means. Every team that wins in the post season is going to get that label, it's a writers cliche.



    More in the spirit of the game, I think I realized exactly how despicable these Cards were when Yadi Molina got sand in his vagina, started a fight with Brandon Phillips in which Chris Carpenter lost his #### and turned it into a serious event, and then Cards nation had the wherewithal to ##### and moan about Johnny Cueto trying to defend himself.


    You mean in which 1. Yadier Molina was antagonized by Phillips, as it was a violatile situation both teams were on edge, and Phillips (who I happen to like) tapped Molina on the shins with his bat. Or after the Reds hit a homerun fireworks going off, and Carpenter being told by the umps to wait for the smoke to clear before pitching, that somehow the whining announcers/press of cincy(not the players or coaches mind you) interpreted as Carpenter "losing his head".

    I like the Cardinals. I liked them as a kid with McGee, Ozzie, Herr, Clark etc...and I still like them. They always seem to play the game right in the sense that they are fundamentally sound and they seem to have fun with it.

    The current iteration of the team isn't that fundamentally sound.

    The question isn't "why hate them." It's why would you not?

    I imagine a fan base that can sell out a post season game is a reason to not hate them, the hatred for those self entitled Braves fans and "america's team" was legitimately earned.

    24. The Id of SugarBear Blanks  posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:51 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    Nobody cares about their pythag. Games are played in 9-inning increments and nobody wants to see a postseason tournament based on pythag wins.

    All the other stuff is a typical byproduct of a baseball season. If you're a good team and a key injury means you don't win your division, tough ####. That's baseball, Suzyn. Or at least it was, until Bud's tournament ruined it.
    25. Crispix Attacks 2: Swag Airlines posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:52 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I wouldn't say the Cardinals "don't" "deserve" "their" ""championships"". It seems that they always have good players and their in-season record often doesn't reflect the high quality of the team they have at the end of September. My complaint is that they always have good players. Try to put together a list of players, since the beginning of the McGwire era, who A) joined the Cardinals (whether as free agents or from the minors), and B) were disappointing with the Cardinals.

    1) Jose Jimenez
    2) Marlon Anderson
    3) Mark Mulder
    4) Anthony Reyes

    Is there anyone else, other than flyers on various veterans who were not expected to do much anyway? (Khalil Greene, Preston Wilson, Kelly Stinnett)

    Maybe Eli Marrero, he was supposed to be a star and that never happened. He was pretty good though.
    26. Sleepy supports unauthorized rambling posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:52 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I think I realized exactly how despicable these Cards were when Yadi Molina got sand in his vagina, started a fight with Brandon Phillips


    People who hate the cardinals are just a bunch of whiny #######.
    27. Smiling Joe Hesketh posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:54 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    Try to put together a list of players, since the beginning of the McGwire era, who A) joined the Cardinals (whether as free agents or from the minors), and B) were disappointing with the Cardinals.

    Mike Maroth proved that Dave Duncan couldn't fix everyone.
    28. The Id of SugarBear Blanks  posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:55 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    But in two days I went from...."ooooh look at all these interesting teams in the playoffs!" to "perhaps this new computer game will give me something to pass the time".

    That's the curse of the LDS. By the time the first week in October rolls around, everyone is ready for playoff baseball and the games are pretty compelling -- then you realize that they've made the LCS and the World Series far worse than it should be. The complete apathy in NYC for the LCS is a compelling leading indicator of just how diluted the postseason is and how fans are finally figuring it out. The Yankees are not selling out LCS games, in a stadium that seats less than 50,000 people.
    29. Yeaarrgghhhh posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:55 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    This is me. Last weekend was tragic. I suppose I can muster up the energy to root against the Yankees in an abstract sort of sense (but not enough to actually watch the games), and a good friend of mine is a Giants fan so I guess I could be happy for him if they win again.

    But in two days I went from...."ooooh look at all these interesting teams in the playoffs!" to "perhaps this new computer game will give me something to pass the time".

    Me too, but the Tigers are an interesting team, and they haven't won in 30 years. So I'm pulling for them.
    30. The Id of SugarBear Blanks  posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:57 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I wouldn't say the Cardinals "don't" "deserve" "their" ""championships"".

    In 2006, they won 83 games. They beat a better team in 7 games in the LCS, and in the World Series played a team that had swept them in the regular season (*), and gone 15-3 against the NL Central, the Cardinals' division. The better team had an absurd 9 (or so) days off between their pummeling of the A's in the LCS and Game 1 of the "World Series." The games in St. Louis were played in a cold drizzle/downpour.

    It doesn't get any more undeserving than that.

    (*) Interleague play has also diluted the postseason and taken away part of its charm.
    31. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on October 15, 2012 at 01:58 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I imagine a fan base that can sell out a post season game is a reason to not hate them, the hatred for those self entitled Braves fans and "america's team" was legitimately earned.


    Did the sand from Yadi's wah wah migrate up yours, now? As New Yankee Stadium can attest to this week, any team that is in the playoffs with regularity will eventually lose fans in the first rounds of the Selig's Neverending Post-Season Tournament.

    Granted, with the cows that come out for "Cardinal nation" you do have a better than average chance of filling that stadium, what with the two-to-one ratio of ass to seat you guys provide.
    32. tshipman  posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:02 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    It's the poor records in weak divisions, it's the way they always pick up white guys who have good years, it's the way their role players always seem to have good playoffs.

    Their whole strategy seems to be, let's have a bunch of guys all get hot in October and we'll win the WS. And it ####### works. That's ########.

    Probably my least favorite team in the NL. Especially now that Pujols is gone.
    33. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:04 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    Me too, but the Tigers are an interesting team, and they haven't won in 30 years. So I'm pulling for them.


    Is this true? Huh. I guess I confused the Tigers and the White Sox.
    34. esseff posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:11 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I liked the Cards of the '80s just fine, but as with so many people, LaRussa and his flexible ethics and perpetual outrage machine pretty much killed that.


    For what it's worth, there are quite a few Cardinals fans who feel the same way about TLR.
    35. Yeaarrgghhhh posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:13 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    The Tigers were awful from the late 80's until the current run started in 2006. They had a couple of 87 win seasons here and there, but they must have had the worst record in baseball over that period. Everyone remembers the Spiders-esque Trammell team in 2003, but they had several other seasons during that period that were comparable. And of course they lost the 2006 WS to the hated, 83 win Cardinals.
    36. Yeaarrgghhhh posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:14 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    David f-ing Eckstein, World Series MVP. I'd forgotten about that.
    37. cardsfanboy  posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:15 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    In 2006, they won 83 games. They beat a better team in 7 games in the LCS, and in the World Series played a team that had swept them in the regular season (*), and gone 15-3 against the NL Central, the Cardinals' division. The better team had an absurd 9 (or so) days off between their pummeling of the A's in the LCS and Game 1 of the "World Series." The games in St. Louis were played in a cold drizzle/downpour.


    Again, they had the second best record and the division locked up and stopped caring in 2006 with about two weeks to go. Standings as of September 16th From that point on, they were focused on setting up their lineup for the post season, resting players during games, etc. They just did not care, yes they had nearly a Braves level historic collapse because of that lack of caring, but ultimately they squeaked into the post season, as they knew they were going to. Then they faced a New York team that had a couple of key injuries, while the Cardinals team was healthy for the first time since the middle of the season. They weren't the same team in the playoffs as they were in the second half of the regular season.
    38. Foghorn Leghorn posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:16 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I guess I started disliking them in 1975ish, with that hideous mustache gang of Sizemore Reitz and Hernandez. At the time, the extreme dislike was for the Phillies and Pirates, but they were disliked as well, and when Joe Torre showed up on the Mets, well, then I really hated them. Then the mid-80s when the team was overrun with alleged pedophiles.

    39. cardsfanboy  posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:17 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I guess I started disliking them in 1975ish, with that hideous mustache gang of Sizemore Reitz and Hernandez.


    You should have waited a year for Vern Rapp to come along, bye bye mustaches.
    40. BourbonSamurai, vassal of the Harpsburg Empire posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:17 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    The Cardinals have always been right at the top of my "the actual teams I root for are out, who is left?" list, but after last year I can't muster up much remaining enthusiasm for them.

    I hold no ill will against them for beating the Nats- their fans were mostly pretty classy about it , and its not like they pulled anything underhanded. They just beat the #### out of the ball when it counted.

    41. ASmitty posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:18 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    Is this true? Huh. I guess I confused the Tigers and the White Sox.


    Well, technically it has only been 28 years. The Tigers last won the WS in 1984.

    I dislike any and all Wild Card champions, and the Cardinals have exemplified that in recent memory. I think winning one's division should be a pre-requisite for winning the league as a whole. I felt the same way about Alabama's BCS title last year. They didn't win the SEC, why should they win the BCS? It's just something that aggravates me in sports.
    42. GuyM posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:19 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    In 2006, they won 83 games. They beat a better team in 7 games in the LCS, and in the World Series played a team that had swept them in the regular season (*), and gone 15-3 against the NL Central, the Cardinals' division. The better team had an absurd 9 (or so) days off between their pummeling of the A's in the LCS and Game 1 of the "World Series." The games in St. Louis were played in a cold drizzle/downpour. It doesn't get any more undeserving than that.

    (*) Interleague play has also diluted the postseason and taken away part of its charm.

    Man, it must really suck to be you.

    This does provide one more reason to hope Jack Morris falls short in this year's HOF vote (not that any more are needed): the perfect super-nova of SBB agony and self-pity that will follow.
    43. Don't want the truth; just wanna see some dingers posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:20 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I had nothing against Ozzie Smith, Willie McGee, Larry Walker, McGwire, etc. Not even TLR. But the last two seasons, sneaking into the playoffs with a rabbit's foot up their butt, is really irritating.

    EDIT: essentially what [32] said.
    44. phredbird  posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:21 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    More in the spirit of the game, I think I realized exactly how despicable these Cards were when Yadi Molina got sand in his vagina, started a fight with Brandon Phillips in which Chris Carpenter lost his #### and turned it into a serious event, and then Cards nation had the wherewithal to ##### and moan about Johnny Cueto trying to defend himself.


    i knew this was going to be a fun thread.
    45. Greg (U)K posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:21 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    That's the curse of the LDS. By the time the first week in October rolls around, everyone is ready for playoff baseball and the games are pretty compelling -- then you realize that they've made the LCS and the World Series far worse than it should be. The complete apathy in NYC for the LCS is a compelling leading indicator of just how diluted the postseason is and how fans are finally figuring it out. The Yankees are not selling out LCS games, in a stadium that seats less than 50,000 people.

    While this may be true in a larger cultural sense (I don't know), it's certainly not the sentiment behind my original comment. It just so happened that this year the teams I wanted to win had high win totals (Nats, A's, and to a lesser extent Orioles). My complaint with the Tigers and the Cardinals isn't that they didn't win as many games as the other guys, it's that I don't particularly like the Tigers and Cardinals. OK, well I don't dislike the Cardinals...I just think they've won enough lately so I'd like to see someone else do it.

    For me, a flawed team making a run and winning is a good thing in a system rather than a bad thing. My interest in the NHL playoffs or the NCAA basketball tournament usually wanes once all the teams that clearly don't belong there are eliminated. I don't claim that it's a widely held view, or that anyone else should hold it, but for me a playoff system that always puts the best team against the best team in the final is kind of boring. Maybe I'm being selfish but the purpose of a tournament isn't for the teams to settle between themselves who's better...it's to entertain me.
    46. phredbird  posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:22 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    I liked the Cards of the '80s just fine, but as with so many people, LaRussa and his flexible ethics and perpetual outrage machine pretty much killed that.


    the cards started out with good ideas but then they went to far.
    47. bunyon posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:23 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    They had a 93-69 pythag

    Despite being a "thinking" fan, I don't give a rip about pythag records. Wins are wins, losses are losses.


    Again, they had the second best record and the division locked up and stopped caring in 2006 with about two weeks to go.

    SOunds like a good reason to hate them. Although I do get it - the early 00s Cards got ripped off several times and they made an adjustment. Perhaps what I hate is that they symbolize the modern idea of championship baseball: do just enough to get into the playoffs and then catch some breaks. It's ugly.

    That isn't really on THEM, of course. But if you are going to be a symbol, people are going to shoot at you.
    48. cmd600 posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:23 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    2006 was the year that they stopped caring what their final season record was going to be with about three weeks left in the season and ended up going from the 2nd best record in the NL to the poor record they ended up with.


    You keep saying this, but I feel it's quite misleading. With exactly 3 weeks left in the 2006 season (Sept 10) the Cardinals actually had the 3rd best NL record, but with six teams within five games of them. That's not a time to say "ok, let's lay off the accelerator". They were also 6th in the NL in run differential at that point for anyone that likes those numbers. I can't find a day after their Aug 1 loss that year where they had a win pct that would put them at even 90 wins.

    Their 2006 could just as easily be interpreted as such: They had a hot April (17-8) and benefited from such a crappy division that playing not even .500, but close, the rest of the way would have been more than enough to make the playoffs.
    49. bunyon posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:24 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    For me, a flawed team making a run and winning is a good thing in a system rather than a bad thing.

    If it happens once in a while, yes. If it happens every ####### year, no.
    50. ASmitty posted on October 15, 2012 at 02:25 PM #  hit 0 | hit 0

    Maybe I'm being selfish but the purpose of a tournament isn't for the teams to settle between themselves who's better...it's to entertain me.


    This is something I like about soccer. The Champion's League is important and great fun and all, but it is distinct from the underlying Championships, which are just based on standings. Best of both world's.

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