BBTF.org/m/giants : The Daily News uncovers bizarre plot by Melky Cabrera to use fake website and duck drug suspension

Thursday, May 23, 2013

Five Notes On the Ridiculous Pablo Sandoval

(www.mccoveychronicles.com)

posted 2 days ago by zenbitz to fat ichiro, giants | 0 comment(s)

A teaser:

I can’t … It’s just … that is so beautiful and hilarious. Again, that’s batting-average against from the catcher’s perspective, so picture a lefty-swinging Sandoval with his back to you over on the right side of your screen. The place you go in the strike zone is in on his hands but, for goodness sake, don’t go too far in! If you miss outside the zone and come close to hitting him, he kind of rakes those pitches. Which doesn’t make sense. But, hey, neither does Sandoval. ...Read More...

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101. Dan Szymborski

posted on August 20, 2012 at 01:14 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

I mean, this isn't a "did he or didn't he?" thing anymore.

When did that happen? Has someone that's not the frigging *Daily News* independently confirmed the story yet? Their coverage of the steroid issue in baseball to-date has been embarrassing, sub-Duranty-level crap.

102. rb's team is hopeful for the new year! posted on August 20, 2012 at 05:22 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

At this point, i've pretty much lost hope.

103. Bhaakon posted on August 20, 2012 at 07:09 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

When did that happen? Has someone that's not the frigging *Daily News* independently confirmed the story yet? Their coverage of the steroid issue in baseball to-date has been embarrassing, sub-Duranty-level crap.

He was probably referring to the "did he use PEDs" aspect, which Cabrera has admitted to.

BTW, is/should there be any additional punishment in store for Melky if this story proves to be true? I'm inclined to say that attempting to scam the arbitration should be a punishable offense in itself, assuming there's proof of it. It's one thing to present an insufficient defense and be ruled against, quite another to present fabricated evidence.

104. Tim McCarver's Orange Marmalade posted on August 20, 2012 at 07:59 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

I'm only 1/32nd marmalade. Most of my ancestors were grape jellies and jams.

105. Lassus posted on August 20, 2012 at 08:03 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

quite another to present fabricated evidence.

Did he do this at some point?

This seems to barely qualify for a charge of "attempted lying"

If this is true, could he be charged with "attempt to plan to lie"?

106. Joey B. has ignited his October #Natitude posted on August 20, 2012 at 09:04 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

I think the overlooked thing on this is that a player failed a drug test and a government agent is now investigating where he got it. If that doesn't pull a chill down the union's spine I don't know what is.

When a union has a significant number of its members operating in a manner similar to an organized crime syndicate, eventually they're going to attract the attention of the feds. If they really thought otherwise, that they were going to be able to get away with this kind of stuff forever, then they're pretty freaking stupid.

107. Biscuit_pants posted on August 20, 2012 at 09:09 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Confessions…

Those aren’t biscuits in my pants, it is actually an iron horse.

Oh and pre-registration days I posted as Smitty*

108. Smitty* posted on August 20, 2012 at 09:14 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Hey so did I!

Oh, and don't you like pants?

109. Ron J2 posted on August 20, 2012 at 09:21 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

#94 It's such a clownshoes attempt at deception that I really couldn't parse the headline on my first try. Something about ducks and a website. Very confusing.

110. Biscuit_pants posted on August 20, 2012 at 09:21 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Hey so did I!

yeah, but I questioned your pants hating from the beginning, this is no shock to me. It is about time you came out of the closet…or drawer.

111. Smitty* posted on August 20, 2012 at 09:34 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

You keep your pants in a drawer? Way to have wrinkled pants there Bub

112. Biscuit_pants posted on August 20, 2012 at 10:42 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

You keep your pants in a drawer? Way to have wrinkled pants there Bub

Oh, I get it now, you hate WRINKLED pants. Well I don’t want to too much information your way at once but they have invented this device that “irons” out wrinkles, it’s called an Iron Link. Another invention that has taken place are wrinkle free pants, but lets work on one thing at a time.

113. Nasty Nate posted on August 20, 2012 at 10:50 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

#94 It's such a clownshoes attempt at deception that I really couldn't parse the headline on my first try. Something about ducks and a website. Very confusing.

I think the Daily News uncovered a fake duck under a suspension bridge.

114. Nasty Nate posted on August 20, 2012 at 10:50 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Oh, and don't you like pants?

That's a clown question, bro.

115. Devin has a deep burning passion for fuzzy socks posted on August 20, 2012 at 11:13 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

I actually have no opinion one way or the other about fuzzy socks.

Even worse, I stole the phrase from the biographical paragraph of a National Spelling Bee competitor.

116. dr. scott posted on August 20, 2012 at 01:06 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Not much to confess. Im both a dr. (though not the uesful kind) and a scott (though not the bagpipe playing kind).

All I can really confess to is being a really bad speller and rarely posting anything relevant.

117. Karl from NY posted on August 20, 2012 at 01:06 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I actually live in <tiny voice> New Jersey.

118. gef the talking mongoose posted on August 20, 2012 at 01:19 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

The jury is still out on whether I'm a Depression-era poltergeist from the Isle of Man.

(Note: For the record, I find the subhed "MAN-WEASEL' OR MONGOOSE?" off-putting.)

119. Poster Nutbag posted on August 20, 2012 at 01:47 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

All I can really confess to is being a really bad speller and rarely posting anything relevant.

In this aspect, this is true for at least 90% of us...

120. Bhaakon posted on August 20, 2012 at 07:33 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Did he do this at some point?

From the article:

“There was a product they said caused this positive,” one source familiar with the case said of Cabrera’s scheme. “Baseball figured out the ruse pretty quickly.”

So clearly Cabrera told MLB that he was using the fictitious supplement.

121. Gonfalon Bubble posted on August 20, 2012 at 07:51 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

When "one source familiar with the case" shaves in the morning, does he see "famed steroid cop" looking back at him in the mirror?

122. Never Give an Inge (Dave) posted on August 20, 2012 at 07:56 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

“Juan Nunez is NOT a salaried employee of ACES and does NOT receive the benefits that all ACES employees receive,” Levinson said. “Most importantly, any and all calls, texts and emails that he sends come from his own PERSONAL devices (BlackBerry).”

How is this the "most important" thing? I suppose these are both good facts for the Levinsons from a legal perspective, but neither proves anything.

123. Joe Bivens, Minor Genius posted on August 20, 2012 at 07:58 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I'm not Joe Bivens, but I'm certainly an idiot.

124. Random Transaction Generator posted on August 20, 2012 at 10:48 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I've only generated one transaction.

125. Poster Nutbag posted on August 21, 2012 at 12:12 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

I've only generated one transaction.

Was it random?

126. Dan Evensen posted on August 21, 2012 at 01:34 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Certified real name checking in, toasting in epic bread.

127. PreservedFish posted on August 21, 2012 at 01:46 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Well, I do enjoy salt-packed anchovies, pickled herrings, bacalao and such.

128. Swedish Chef posted on August 21, 2012 at 02:02 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Well, I do enjoy salt-packed anchovies, pickled herrings, bacalao and such.

What about surströmming?

129. PreservedFish posted on August 21, 2012 at 02:28 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

I have in fact tasted surstromming, and I didn't think it was terrible. It was covered in sour cream and raw red onions, which helped, and we chased it with aquavit, which also helped. Some of the people I tried it with retched and couldn't even put it in their mouths. It was a funny scene. I actually finished my portion with a smile. This all happened at a restaurant where I was working, the surstromming was brought in by a Swedish cook who himself couldn't bare to smell it. Later in the week one of the owners put it on a pizza that we served to Iron Chef Morimoto, who was dining there, and he reportedly enjoyed it. That sounds like a joke but it isn't.

I've never tried the Icelandic rancid shark dish (Hakarl) but that sounds like another level of disgusting.

130. Squash posted on August 21, 2012 at 02:56 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

When a union has a significant number of its members operating in a manner similar to an organized crime syndicate, eventually they're going to attract the attention of the feds. If they really thought otherwise, that they were going to be able to get away with this kind of stuff forever, then they're pretty freaking stupid.

It doesn't seem particularly surprising to me either. These are controlled substances after all, whatever the agreement between MLB and the MLBPA. Someone's getting this stuff for these guys, I doubt very much Melky Cabrera enters the United States every year with eight months worth of synthetic testosterone stuffed down his pants. Whoever that is is trafficking in controlled substances, whatever one thinks of the law.

131. Swedish Chef posted on August 21, 2012 at 03:37 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Later in the week one of the owners put it on a pizza that we served to Iron Chef Morimoto, who was dining there, and he reportedly enjoyed it.

On a pizza? Sacrilege!

I kind of wonder if surströmming ever was anything more than a macho trip for northerners. If it was used to avoid starvation, wouldn't the season for it have been in the middle of the winter like lutfisk instead of August-September when there's plenty of palatable foodstuffs around?

The other important event on the calendar in northern Sweden is the elk hunt in late autumn, so maybe a minor macho trip before the big one.

132. Lassus posted on August 21, 2012 at 08:29 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

I've never tried the Icelandic rancid shark dish (Hakarl) but that sounds like another level of disgusting.

I don't use this word lightly: indescribable. Made the Beijing Night Market seem like McDonalds

133. Weekly Journalist_ posted on August 21, 2012 at 09:02 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

"A common myth tells that the dish originated with Swedish sailors in the 16th century. The story goes that they only had half the amount of salt needed to keep their fish fresh, so it began to rot. The sailors came across some Finnish islanders and decided to con them by selling the rotten fish to them. The Finns bought it and the sailors went away. A year later the Swedish sailors returned to the island and the locals asked if they had more rotten fish. The sailors decided to try it themselves, liked it and made more."

Finns are truly vile people.

134. Weekly Journalist_ posted on August 21, 2012 at 09:17 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

"In 1981 a German landlord evicted a tenant without notice after the tenant spread surströmming brine in the apartment building's staircase. When the landlord was taken to court, the court ruled that the termination was justified when the landlord's party demonstrated their case by opening a can inside the courtroom. The court concluded that it "had convinced itself that the disgusting smell of the fish brine far exceeded the degree that fellow-tenants in the building could be expected to tolerate."[8]"

135. Joey B. has ignited his October #Natitude posted on August 21, 2012 at 10:10 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

It doesn't seem particularly surprising to me either. These are controlled substances after all, whatever the agreement between MLB and the MLBPA. Someone's getting this stuff for these guys, I doubt very much Melky Cabrera enters the United States every year with eight months worth of synthetic testosterone stuffed down his pants. Whoever that is is trafficking in controlled substances, whatever one thinks of the law.

And it hardly needs to be said that the Dominican Republic is one of the biggest sources of the problem. It's only a matter of time before eventually the feds are going to find out what person or people are behind this little Dominican mafia-style drug trafficking outfit operating within baseball, and when they finally get busted, they're going to be looking at big-time prison sentences.

136. The Good Face posted on August 21, 2012 at 10:28 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Finns are truly vile people.

Considering their most famous dessert, mammi, resembles nothing so much as a lump of fresh dog ####, you might be on to something.

137. BourbonSamurai, vassal of the Harpsburg Empire posted on August 21, 2012 at 11:58 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

This is an excellent thread. In the interest of full disclosure, I should add that while I am not a samurai, I do generally contain Bourbon and am in America until saturday.

138. SoSH U at work posted on August 21, 2012 at 12:08 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

As long as we're sharing: I am unacceptable in most social settings* (and SoSHal ones, at least I was at one point). Though, honestly, ever since that stretch where we had to re-register on a daily basis, it's no guarantee I'm at the office when I'm posting under this particular handle.

* Because, unlike my former spiritual leader, I really, really do hate pants.

139. salajander posted on August 22, 2012 at 01:35 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I'm not a salajander. Or a salamander. Or named Sal.

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Thursday, May 23, 2013

Five Notes On the Ridiculous Pablo Sandoval

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