BBTF.org/m/michael_schur : Return of the Pozcast

Sunday, December 23, 2012

The Poscast, Ep. 5: With Michael Schur

(www.sportsonearth.com)

posted on December 23, 2012 at 03:14 PM by The District Attorney to hall of fame, joe posnanski, michael schur, ped, podcasts | 38 comment(s)

Joe Posnanski and Michael Schur discuss Hall of Fame voting in the context of steroids (have we touched on that subject yet?), and then run down the ballot. Both believe the HOF should have an “inner sanctum”; in its absence, Schur believes in a first-ballot distiction. Thus, as I understood it, their 2012 ballots would be:

Poz: Bagwell, Biggio, Bonds, Clemens, McGwire, Piazza, Raines, Schilling, Trammell, L. Walker (I’m taking his statement that he voted for Edgar “in the past” as a sign he ...

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1. Gonfalon Bubble posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:51 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Schur: Yoda

Foolish pick. There Is No Such Thing As A Productive Puppet.

2. Slivers of Maranville (SdeB) posted on March 19, 2012 at 10:20 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Drafting Star Wars characters for what? To play baseball? Fight a team deathmatch? Sleep with?

3. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) posted on March 19, 2012 at 10:24 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

An all-Florida World Series played in the new Miami Stadium would be the perfect way to usher us into the apocalypse.

4. The District Attorney posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:09 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Drafting Star Wars characters for what? To play baseball? Fight a team deathmatch? Sleep with?

Really just the "best" characters, although perhaps even that is more specific than these drafts are intended to be.

5. Baldrick posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:15 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

First pick in the draft is huge. Han Solo is so much better than any other character.

But even accounting for that, Poz pretty much shot himself in the foot. Luke as a #2? Yikes.

6. Mirabelli Dictu (Chris McClinch) posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:24 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

The real mistake was not taking Darth Vader as the #2 overall. You could even make an argument for him over Han, but there's just no justifying Obi-Wan over Vader unless your sole criterion is "results of light saber duels while surrounded by magma."

7. PhillyBooster posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:26 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

On any positive measure (strength, coolness, intelligence, whiney-ness, sexiness . . .) I cannot see how anyone would pick Luke over Leia.

Really, Leia, Yoda, and Chewie are no-brainers above him. It should come down to Luke or Lando. I'd pick Luke if I already had Han Solo. If I didn't get Han in the first, I'd take Lando.

8. Greg (U)K posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:48 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Looking at the teams

Solo
Vader
Yoda
Chewie
Fett

vs

Obi Wan
Luke
Leia
Lando
R2D2

That's not even close.

9. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:55 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

First pick in the draft is huge. Han Solo is so much better than any other character.

Is this pre-re-release Han Solo, the badass who plays by his own set of rules and shoots Greedo first, or post-re-release Han Solo who is just meh.

10. Chokeland Bill posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:57 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Han has the "sucked in Return of the Jedi" problem and Vader has the "sucked in the prequels" problem. Obi Wan was pretty much the only reasonable character in the prequels.

11. PhillyBooster posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:58 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Mace Windu wuz robbed! (C-3PO wasn't.)

12. FancyPantsHandle glistening with foreign substance posted on March 19, 2012 at 12:04 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Mace Windu wuz robbed! (C-3PO wasn't.)

I'd take Darth Maul over either of them...

13. Baldrick posted on March 19, 2012 at 12:04 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Is this pre-re-release Han Solo, the badass who plays by his own set of rules and shoots Greedo first, or post-re-release Han Solo who is just meh.

The good one.

They actually have a lengthy conversation about this. And Schur rightly points out that it's not that Han shot first. Han was the only one that shot; Greedo just died.

14. Dave Spiwak posted on March 19, 2012 at 12:12 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Looking at the teams

Solo
Vader
Yoda
Chewie
Fett

vs

Obi Wan
Luke
Leia
Lando
R2D2

That's not even close.

Here are some ML equivalents, off the top of my head:

Solo = Don Mattingly
Vader = 2001-2004 Bonds
Yoda = Connie Mack
Chewie = Jose Canseco
Fett = Bo Belinski

vs

Obi Wan = Jamie Moyer, Phil Neikro, The Old Pitcher From Major League
Luke = Early Vintage Ken Griffey Jr. or Vlad Guerrero (hyperactive, prone to poor decision-making)
Leia = Manny Ramirez ('cause of the hormones)
Lando = Ricky Henderson
R2D2 = John Olerud

15. The District Attorney posted on March 19, 2012 at 12:20 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

The real mistake was not taking Darth Vader as the #2 overall.

Yeah, absolutely, that is Sam Bowie right there.

there's just no justifying Obi-Wan over Vader unless your sole criterion is "results of light saber duels while surrounded by magma."

Mace Windu wuz robbed!

I'd take Darth Maul over either of them...

These were not eligible for consideration.

Chewie = Jose Canseco

Charlie Keller was nicknamed "King Kong" because he was extremely strong and extremely hairy. If your criteria on the other hand is coherence, I don't know how he stacked up there.

16. puck posted on March 19, 2012 at 01:13 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

But even accounting for that, Poz pretty much shot himself in the foot. Luke as a #2? Yikes.

But he's young with tremendous upside!

17. Baldrick posted on March 19, 2012 at 01:31 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

TINSTAAJP
(There is no such thing as a Jedi prospect)

18. Bob Evans posted on March 19, 2012 at 01:35 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

It was an unfair draft. Poz should've gotten 2 & 3, etc.

19. The District Attorney posted on March 19, 2012 at 02:59 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

It was an unfair draft. Poz should've gotten 2 & 3, etc.

Probably. Then again, he was talking about taking Wicket W. Warrick early, so if your scouting is that bad, maybe there's just no hope.

20. FancyPantsHandle glistening with foreign substance posted on March 19, 2012 at 03:20 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

These were not eligible for consideration.

If friggin Lando is available, then I am making Darth Maul available, rules be damned!

21. Baldrick posted on March 19, 2012 at 03:24 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

If friggin Lando is available, then I am making Darth Maul available, rules be damned!

Lando is in two of the three movies. Darth Maul is in zero of the three movies.

22. Dave Spiwak posted on March 19, 2012 at 03:30 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

If Darth Maul is available, then characters from my yet-to-be-written fan fiction should be available!

23. FancyPantsHandle glistening with foreign substance posted on March 19, 2012 at 05:20 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Lando is in two of the three movies. Darth Maul is in zero of the three movies.

I. DON'T. GIVE A DAMN! Lando is a friggin schmuck. He's an embarrassment.

24. Barry`s_Lazy_Boy posted on March 19, 2012 at 05:32 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

How does Lando go ahead of Boba?

25. Graham posted on March 19, 2012 at 05:43 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

"R2D2 = John Olerud"

Rickey used to fly an X-wing with a wisecracking, Nubian astromech droid in the last days of the Old Republic that looked like R2D2.

26. The Long Arm of Rudy Law posted on March 19, 2012 at 05:56 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I thought we were going to talk about baseball statistics here, but instead it's just a bunch of NERDS!

27. bunyon posted on March 19, 2012 at 06:15 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

There is no such thing as a Jedi prospect

They do tend to drop off a cliff at about the age of 7 or so.

28. The Mohole* of David Wells (* - Piehole)

posted on March 19, 2012 at 06:36 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I can't believe no one picks Emperor Palpatine! An extreme value pick at #11.

29. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) posted on March 19, 2012 at 06:40 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I can't believe no one picks Emperor Palpatine! An extreme value pick at #11.

Or Gandalf or Spock for that matter!

30. The District Attorney posted on March 19, 2012 at 06:43 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Lando is a friggin schmuck. He's an embarrassment.

Schur almost, but not quite, made what I think is a fantastic point that never hit me before: It would have made much more dramatic sense for Han, rather than Lando, to be in the Millennium Falcon destroying the second Death Star. This is true not so much because Lando's conversion to the Rebel cause isn't fully explained (the part Schur concentrated on), but simply because Han is a more critical character to the story. It would have been better.

There is no such thing as a Jedi prospect

Considering that being a Jedi is entirely controlled by the contents of the bloodstream, this is probably true.

31. The Mohole* of David Wells (* - Piehole)

posted on March 19, 2012 at 06:45 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

the contents of the bloodstream

Among many terrible things that George Lucas did, this was probably the worst.

32. Bob Meta-Meusel posted on March 19, 2012 at 07:26 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

How does Lando go ahead of Boba?

Poz had one to many ice cold Colt '45s.

33. AndrewJ posted on March 19, 2012 at 08:05 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I get first dibs on Ackmena.

(Google it, slackers)

34. Monty posted on March 19, 2012 at 08:06 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

How does Lando go ahead of Boba?

Boba? The guy that got knocked into a Sarlacc pit by a blind guy with a stick?

35. Slivers of Maranville (SdeB) posted on March 19, 2012 at 08:10 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

34 posts and no mention of Admiral Akbar? You folks are slipping.

36. Jose Canusee posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:02 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Han Solo=Derek Jeter. All-Star, but not #1 material in a big fight. And in any team game R2D2 is a must, without him Luke and Han don't even survive. In fact, Vader and R2D2 probably can take on the other 8 and win. OK, maybe not Yoda but the other 7.

37. Lassus posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:07 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

the contents of the bloodstream
Among many terrible things that George Lucas did, this was probably the worst.

Disagree. Honestly, I was glad it wasn't more JUST CLAP YOUR HANDS AND TINKERBELL WILL LIVE explanation of the Force when that movie came out. I liked the physical connection. I mean, Lucas ###### up so many other things with those movies, I don't think this one was even close to the top 25.

Boba? The guy that got knocked into a Sarlacc pit by a blind guy with a stick?

The death of Boba Fett has to one of my favorite deaths ever. All that attention for a guy with a jet pack who gets swallowed by a sinkhole.

38. villageidiom posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:10 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I. DON'T. GIVE A DAMN! Lando is a friggin schmuck. He's an embarrassment.

This draft is getting worse all the time!

39. PreservedFish posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:11 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I want the guy with the head that wraps around his head. Jabba the Hutt's butler.

Han Solo=Derek Jeter.

Oh, no, Luke is Jeter. Bland and important. Han Solo is too wild and fun. George Brett?

40. tshipman

posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:15 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Oh, no, Luke is Jeter. Bland and important. Han Solo is too wild and fun. George Brett?

Han is clearly Babe Ruth.

41. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:15 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Han Solo is too wild and fun. George Brett?

If we know one thing for certain, we know Han was doing coke off of a whore's ass in the Met's 1986 clubhouse.

42. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:21 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Han is clearly Babe Ruth.

Does that make Barry Bonds General Grievous?

43. Baldrick posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:23 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Obi Wan strikes me as Greg Maddux circa 2002. Noble, wise, giving us a glimpse of a truly awesome power that has begun to pass him by. But honorable to the end. Which makes Vader Clemens. Chief rival of Obi Wan. Just as Obi Wan fades gracefully into the night, Vader wins another couple Cy Young Awards. But in the aftermath it's clear which one is more powerful.

I guess that also means that Clemens will kill Barry Bonds at some point? Presumably as Bonds is torturing Jeter.

This is getting weird.

44. Rickey Fredonia Fudge Duckery Precious Twiddle posted on March 19, 2012 at 09:28 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

I guess that also means that Clemens will kill Barry Bonds at some point? Presumably as Bonds is torturing Jeter.

Okay. In this case, Juan Gonzalez or Mike Piazza is Darth Maul, right? Or Kevin Brown?!

45. Infinite Joost (Voxter)

posted on March 19, 2012 at 10:16 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Solo = Don Mattingly
Vader = 2001-2004 Bonds
Yoda = Connie Mack
Chewie = Jose Canseco
Fett = Bo Belinski

vs

Obi Wan = Jamie Moyer, Phil Neikro, The Old Pitcher From Major League
Luke = Early Vintage Ken Griffey Jr. or Vlad Guerrero (hyperactive, prone to poor decision-making)
Leia = Manny Ramirez ('cause of the hormones)
Lando = Ricky Henderson
R2D2 = John Olerud

Aw, hell to the naw.

Solo = Willie Mays
Vader = 2001-2004 Bonds (that one seems right)
Yoda = John McGraw (both as player and manager)
Chewie = Dave Kingman
Fett = Shannon Stewart (once got way too much attention for not doing that much)

vs

Obi Wan = Satchel Paige
Luke = Jeter is a good one (equally annoying, for different reasons, in youth and age)
Leia = Pedro Martinez (little-used, excellent, not as rad as Han Solo by any stretch)
Lando = Ryan Howard (overrated, reasonably valuable sometimes)
R2D2 = John Olerud (this one seems right)

46. FancyPantsHandle glistening with foreign substance posted on March 19, 2012 at 10:20 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Jar Jar = Neifi
Discuss.

47. Cowboy Popup posted on March 19, 2012 at 11:46 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Okay. In this case, Juan Gonzalez or Mike Piazza is Darth Maul, right? Or Kevin Brown?!

Extremely high, short peak brought about by the dark side. I was thinking Eric Gagne.

Wedge Antilles ougtha be in any original trilogy draft. He survived TWO death star runs and the Battle of Hoth. He may be HOVG instead of HOF, but if Fett gets picked, Wedge should be too.

48. villageidiom posted on March 20, 2012 at 12:26 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

Wedge Antilles ougtha be in any original trilogy draft. He survived TWO death star runs and the Battle of Hoth.

Wedge Antilles = Eric Hinske

49. FancyPantsHandle glistening with foreign substance posted on March 20, 2012 at 02:45 AM # hit 0 | hit 0

BTW, I have Chewie = Manny

Now go ahead and try and watch SW without going 'That's just Chewie being Chewie' 17 times.

50. The District Attorney posted on March 20, 2012 at 04:29 PM # hit 0 | hit 0

Honestly, I was glad it wasn't more JUST CLAP YOUR HANDS AND TINKERBELL WILL LIVE explanation of the Force when that movie came out.

This is an oddly strident complaint. Why would it even need to be "explained" at all?

Chewie = Dave Kingman

Another good point Schur (I think) makes is that, despite being a behemoth who can tear arms out of sockets, Chewie is not used as "muscle" in any sense, and in fact has the highly technical responsibility of pilot/engineer. I don't think Kingman fits.

2D2 = John Olerud (this one seems right)

I would say more like Tony Phillips... adapts perfectly to any situation in which you put him. (Of course, taking another angle, Charlie Gehringer was "The Mechanical Man.")

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Sunday, December 23, 2012

The Poscast, Ep. 5: With Michael Schur

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Michael Schur Think Factory