But the baseball model is hugely problematic. It’s competitive, it makes sexual intercourse the goal, and it assigns strict and unyielding roles for “the players.” It doesn’t do anything to help young people develop healthy ideas about the place of sexuality in their lives.

Sounds like it reflects reality pretty accurately, then. Unless your goal is to undo thousands of generations of evolution and completely re-write human nature.

Have a pizza.

Baseball won’t go away as our all-purpose model for talking about sex until we have an alternative to replace it.

But metaphors—and in this case, euphemisms—serve a purpose.

What have I heard from them? The “bases” still refer to specific sexual acts that are performed in a strict order. You can be a “pitcher” or a “catcher,” depending on whether you perform or receive a sexual act. You can “score” or “hit a home run,” or be a “bench warmer” if you’re a virgin or someone who isn’t “in the game.”

Any "pizza" references to be found in Raymond Carver's oeuvre?

My favorite kind of pizza is pepperoni.