Jason Brannon’s about to go HAM!
SLG: Slüg. It’s Scandinavian. Slüg…
WAR: This has two different pronunciations, depending on which version of WAR you’re referring to. FanGraphs’ WAR is pronounced like the Franco-Prussian War, while the Baseball Reference version is like the War of 1812. See the difference? Neither does anyone else.
FIP: Remember that pointy weapon from the X-Files? You know, the one they used to stab aliens in the back of the neck, because that’s the only way to kill an alien? The sound that thing makes when it’s unsheathed is how you say “FIP.”...
ISO: The cliché of the Japanese character always saying, “Ah, so!” dates back to the end of World War II, when Emperor Hirohito met with ordinary Japanese citizens for the first time at the insistence of General MacArthur. When the emperor’s awed subjects told him about their lives he would meekly reply, “Ah, so” or “I see, I see.” This has nothing to do with the pronunciation of ISO, I just wanted to remind our Belgian readers that we destroyed the nation of Japan and we can do the same thing to your country, no problem. That would be no problem for us at all.
BABiP: Just say “batting average on balls in play,” unless you want to be alone for the rest of your life. God, you’re a nerd. No wonder girls won’t talk to you.
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