The human brain is one weird organ.

Though I am tempted to change my handle to "born on fifth base thinking I hit a quintuple."

That's the kind of thing you'd hear someone say in the opening scene of an episode of "House" right before they collapsed. Hopefully that was just a misspeak and not a sign of something else.

The list of suspected henchmen included..... George Clooney.

This is fascinating.

I'm envisioning that the player representing the go-ahead run has set up his own base somewhere in the middle of the infield, by stealing Mike Adams's pitching rubber.

That's the kind of thing you'd hear someone say in the opening scene of an episode of "House" right before they collapsed.

Well, at least we know it's not lupus.

TFA speculated that it might have been a migraine. That seems like one of the less serious possibilities, so I'm going to hope for that.

Yeah. Looks like a couple of people there provided links to reports of somewhat similar migraine-related episodes.

Lord. Scary.

(Never had a migraine. My deepest sympathies to those of you who have & do. They sound godawful.)

In high school I tried to get to fifth base with a girl. The robbery wasn't the only thing that was botched by henchman.

President Bush (the elder) was said to suffer from dysphasia when he would sometimes vocally wander during an interview or Q&A session. The linked definition doesn't do this explanation justice, but it falls in line with what this sound byte contains.

It also explains the weird combinations of words and typos in the first few posts of that R.A. Dickey appeal thread from the other day. Maybe it's spreading?

Barnett is to undergo tests regarding his migraines, and will miss the next two games.

side effects include Verbal Dysphasia and Octopus Loss

President Bush (the elder) was said to suffer from dysphasia when he would sometimes vocally wander during an interview or Q&A session.

One of his White House speechwriters was baseball author Curt Smith. Flip open any of Curt's baseball announcer anecdote books to a random page and you'll see where the dysphasia came from.

Go #### yourself San Diego!

I was listening to that game. Although the sudden rambling sounded like authentic Dave Barnett, my mind couldn't accept that possibility. I thought it had to be some kind of bleedover from another channel or something. Or, I worried, maybe it was me that malfunctioning. Rather frightening, as a friend of mine, recovering from a brain tumor sometime loses grasp of the language and responds to "good morning" with something like "goldfish."

Never had a migraine

I don't get migraines, except one time when I had an optical migraine. No head pain involved -- my vision just started to fracture. Over the course of a half hour to 45 minutes, it went from being a spot in my field of vision in one eye that would not go away, to looking as if I was looking at the world through a mix of broken glass and crinkled cellophane.

Somewhere in the middle of that I had my wife drive me to the emergency room, because I had no idea what was happening and I assumed some neurological event. After I got there, over the course of the next half hour to 45 minutes, it reversed itself. I did not get a straight answer from anyone and spent the night under observation.

The next morning, the partner of my regular doctor came by, and told me what I had. I looked it up and the symptoms fit perfectly. Never had another one, and this was around 10 years ago or so.

a friend of mine, recovering from a brain tumor sometime loses grasp of the language and responds to "good morning" with something like "goldfish."

Which reminds me...how many surrealists does it take to screw in a light bulb?

Bluefish.

I get migraines occasionally. Starts with a blurred area in my vision, then a tingling in my face, then intense pain that becomes unbearable when I perceive light or sound.

I would only wish them on one person, but only because they get frequent migraines that seem worse than that.

This is evil... but every time he gets to "botched robbery," I break out in uncontrollable giggles. It's just so ... incongruous.

EDIT: "fifth base" is good too. Also, really hoping he's ok.

side effects include Verbal Dysphasia and Octopus Loss

Not to mention flushing, blushing and extreme shortness of pants.

Nice try, Stephen Fry.