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Friday, March 14, 2014

Belligerent Red Sox Prospect Arrested While “Looking To Get Some Pussy”

Not just another cat lover.

Jim Furtado Posted: March 14, 2014 at 08:28 PM | 28 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: red sox, young stupid kids

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   1. Jolly Old St. Nick Is A Jolly Old St. Crip Posted: March 14, 2014 at 08:39 PM (#4671938)
The story right above this one on that website: "John Daly Shoots A 90, Continues To Give No Fucks"
   2. Fernigal McGunnigle has become a merry hat Posted: March 14, 2014 at 08:46 PM (#4671941)
Don't forget "Damon Bruce Was Banned From The Giants' Clubhouse For Taking Creepshots". High class all around!

EDIT: Also, I thought the word ##### was nannied.
EDIT EDIT: It is! I call my cat ##### and call my chicken #### and call my female dog ##### and call everyone else #### for brains.
   3. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: March 14, 2014 at 08:51 PM (#4671943)
I thought that fat toad Irabu had died.
   4. SteveM. Posted: March 14, 2014 at 09:06 PM (#4671950)
To be fair, most of my problems in life has sprung from the same problem.
   5. Swedish Chef Posted: March 14, 2014 at 09:10 PM (#4671954)
I thought that fat toad Irabu had died.

He died three years ago.
   6. Nasty Nate Posted: March 14, 2014 at 09:18 PM (#4671959)
Three straight years of a Sox player getting arrested during spring training.
   7. Steve Balboni's Personal Trainer Posted: March 14, 2014 at 10:37 PM (#4671982)
I can understand Denney's considerable swagger: he did hit .203 with a .622 OPS in the Gulf Coast league last season. Pretty impressive.

   8. madvillain Posted: March 14, 2014 at 11:08 PM (#4671989)
According to Mass Live he signed for an 825,000 dollar bonus. So, what, after taxes he's got 500k or so? After he buys a that truck, maybe a little condo, he's down to what, 100k? I'm guessing half the cops in Florida that have been on the job 10 or more years have about the same or more coin then this guy. It's not like he's a multimillionaire.

And yea, he had a .622 OPS in rookie league. He's hardly on the fast tract to MLB riches. Maybe he really needed a slumpbuster.
   9. Jose Is The Most Absurd Thing on the Site Posted: March 15, 2014 at 12:01 AM (#4671996)
Seriously, if you are going to be this big a ######## it is probably a good idea to not suck first.
   10. The Yankee Clapper Posted: March 15, 2014 at 12:08 AM (#4671997)
. . . he did hit .203 with a .622 OPS in the Gulf Coast league

He's going to have to do better than that to live up to his potential as a BBTF thread generator.
   11. Nasty Nate Posted: March 15, 2014 at 01:29 AM (#4672006)
My immature side thinks it would be funny uf they ran the headline with no quotes.
   12. Commissioner Bud Black Beltre Hillman Posted: March 15, 2014 at 01:56 AM (#4672007)
[2] for some reason I've always heard that as 'Dave and Bruce'. But it's Damon Bruce. And I learned something today.
   13. Drexl Spivey Posted: March 15, 2014 at 04:32 AM (#4672013)
for some reason I've always heard that as 'Dave and Bruce'. But it's Damon Bruce. And I learned something today


This reminds of bits from two of my all-time favorite sitcoms.

In IASIP, there's an episode where Charlie wants to be the "Holland Oates" of a band.

In Newsradio, there's this: "Dave, if I wanted to have this conversation I'd have hired that guy Siskel Ebert to do your job," and I'd say, "Sir, Siskel and Ebert are two people," and you'd say, "Dave, just because the man is fat is no reason to make fun of him."
   14. Rennie's Tenet Posted: March 15, 2014 at 07:51 AM (#4672022)
From Robert Creamer's book about Babe Ruth - the Babe's first trip to New York:

"The Orioles stayed at a Manhattan hotel when playing in Newark or Jersey City. One night outfielder George Twombly saw Ruth sitting on the street curb next to a lamppost.

“What are you doing?” Twombly asked Babe.

“I’m waiting for a girl.”

“What girl?”

“I don’t know,” Ruth said. “I’m just waiting. The boys at the reform school said if you’re in New York and you want a woman, all you have to do is wait for a streetwalker to come along.”

“You better get in the hotel,” warned a startled Twombly. “You better not let Dunnie catch you out here waiting for a streetwalker.”"
   15. Jolly Old St. Nick Is A Jolly Old St. Crip Posted: March 15, 2014 at 07:59 AM (#4672025)
"The Orioles stayed at a Manhattan hotel when playing in Newark or Jersey City.

That tells you something in itself about the Manhattan of 1914.
   16. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: March 15, 2014 at 09:27 AM (#4672037)
Man, between this and Cody Koback getting arrested for strangling his ex-girlfriend, it's been one hell of an offseason for marginal Red Sox minor leaguers.
   17. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: March 15, 2014 at 09:32 AM (#4672039)
I thought that fat toad Irabu had died.

He died three years ago.


Yeah, and he apparently committed suicide. It was really sad.
   18. simon bedford Posted: March 15, 2014 at 10:20 AM (#4672046)
thanks for the link to the irabu story, it was far more interesting ( and depressing) than i expected
   19. Publius Publicola Posted: March 15, 2014 at 12:58 PM (#4672083)
Dayn Perry over at CBSSports wrote a highly amusing story of this abusrd episode.

According to police, Denney said "he was a Boston Red Sox player and he didn't care [sic] he had money and made more money than we would ever see." When handcuffed, the report said, Denney said "he would be out in no time because of who he played for and that he made three million a year."

Having been a 19-year-old male sub-moron at one point, I fully realize that most 19-year-old males are sub-morons, but these alleged actions are excessive by even those low standards.

As always, driving like a rank fool puts other people in danger, and while I have no doubt that money and power afford judicial privilege on some level, I do doubt that Jon Denney, third-round draft choice, is of the necessary status just yet. Also, someone needs to show him his pay stub and point out that the zeroes to the right of the decimal place don't mean what he seems to think they mean.
   20. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) Posted: March 15, 2014 at 01:52 PM (#4672101)
ccording to police, Denney said "he was a Boston Red Sox player and he didn't care [sic] he had money and made more money than we would ever see." When handcuffed, the report said, Denney said "he would be out in no time because of who he played for and that he made three million a year."


He's no Matt ####### Bush.
   21. The Yankee Clapper Posted: March 15, 2014 at 02:01 PM (#4672105)
Denney said "he would be out in no time because of who he played for and that he made three million a year."

Talk about burying the lede! The Red Sox must be paying people under the table to get around Selig's slotting system. Investigation!
   22. boteman Posted: March 15, 2014 at 04:51 PM (#4672177)
We've been going about this all wrong. This Jon Denney's okay! He's a player, he's in Fort Myers. We get this guy laid, we won't have any trouble!
   23. Voros McCracken of Pinkus Posted: March 15, 2014 at 05:29 PM (#4672187)
On a serious note, there's a chance this could be a good thing for the kid. Nothing apparently happened that can't be dealt with and gotten past. And if the humiliation from this causes him to grow up and mature some, it could ultimately work out to his benefit. He's very young and my understanding is that he's an extremely talented kid on the baseball field. If this motivates him to make some positive changes...
   24. Publius Publicola Posted: March 15, 2014 at 11:00 PM (#4672245)
Here's his scouting report from SoxProspects:

Scouting Report: Athletic catcher with plus power. Very high ceiling. Good bat speed. Projects to have average to above-average hit tool. Defense lags behind the bat at this point, but the tools are there to be an above-average defensive catcher. Strong arm but throwing mechanics could use some work. Athleticism should allow him to move to a corner outfield spot in the future if needed.
   25. Knock on any Iorg Posted: March 15, 2014 at 11:04 PM (#4672248)
I protest the use of the locker room slur "pusšy". I hope that he will see the error of his ways and use the term punani.
   26. CFiJ Posted: March 16, 2014 at 11:07 AM (#4672324)
I hope that he will see the error of his ways and use the term punani.

I can no longer see that word without hearing it as said by Dave Chappelle as Tron.
   27. The kids disappeared, now Der-K has too much candy Posted: March 16, 2014 at 11:23 AM (#4672333)
Denney fell a bit in the draft - consensus was that he was first round material, though he lost a little luster in the days before selection. I wonder if his fall was in part due to character issues?
   28. Jeltzandini Posted: March 16, 2014 at 11:48 AM (#4672345)
Empirical studies have concluded that highlighting income disparities between suspect and police is an ineffective arrest avoidance strategy.

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