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Wednesday, April 11, 2012

Construction on Ryan Howard’s $23 Million Florida Home (And Lazy River) Begins This Month

Going, Going, Gondola!

Last year we told you that Howard needed to get special permission to build a “moat” with his new home in Belleair Beach, Florida, which is located just a bit south of Clearwater and Clearwater Beach. The “moat” is - technically - a lazy river, which is not quite as awesome, but significantly more useful (unless of course Howard plans on fighting off medieval curveball hurling troops… in which case he’ll probably need a moat, too).

Howard paid $3.5 million for the lot in February 2011, and construction will get underway this month on the 17,500 square-foot mansion, estimated to cost $23 million.

The home, which will be built on land that occupies over an acre of Gulf-front property, will include a “Venice-style lazy river running from the swimming pool underneath a series of bridges” and a bowling alley with breakaway walls.

Repoz Posted: April 11, 2012 at 09:13 PM | 29 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: business, phillies

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   1. Comic Strip Person Posted: April 11, 2012 at 09:43 PM (#4104556)
Well, if the Phillies are going to give him stupid money, he might as well spend it stupid.
   2. McCoy Posted: April 11, 2012 at 09:56 PM (#4104564)
I see we'll be having a new name added to the list of athletes that lost it all.
   3. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn) Posted: April 11, 2012 at 10:24 PM (#4104578)
I'll never understand why so many people want to live in Florida.
   4. franklloyd Posted: April 11, 2012 at 10:29 PM (#4104583)
Simple - no income tax, lots of sun and golf, and Howard won't be home during 90% of hurricane season.
   5. Pasta-diving Jeter (jmac66) Posted: April 11, 2012 at 10:29 PM (#4104584)
I'll never understand why so many people want to live in Florida.

NSFT
   6. smileyy Posted: April 11, 2012 at 10:30 PM (#4104585)
So...what...if the cost estimate is $23M, it'll probably end up closer to $30M, and will probably later sell for...$10M?
   7. Barry`s_Lazy_Boy Posted: April 11, 2012 at 10:34 PM (#4104589)
So...what...if the cost estimate is $23M, it'll probably end up closer to $30M, and will probably later sell for...$10M?

Similar ROI as the Phillies. If they're lucky.

   8. Pasta-diving Jeter (jmac66) Posted: April 11, 2012 at 10:36 PM (#4104590)
Up a Razy Liver (for all you Asian Hoagy fans)
   9. JH (in DC) Posted: April 11, 2012 at 10:40 PM (#4104595)
   10. Walt Davis Posted: April 12, 2012 at 01:00 AM (#4104696)
If he had an active river, maybe RA Dickey would drop by for a swim.
   11. Jesse Barfield's Right Arm Posted: April 12, 2012 at 11:17 AM (#4104888)
Howard is a multiple MVP winner


Most Valuable Property?
   12. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: April 12, 2012 at 11:29 AM (#4104895)
Up a Razy Liver (for all you Asian Hoagy fans)

It's wrong, but I love how the Japanese people in our week long meeting pronounce "Deliverable"
   13. Never Give an Inge (Dave) Posted: April 12, 2012 at 04:25 PM (#4105187)

The article doesn't reveal Howard's true plans for the lazy river.
   14. zonk Posted: April 12, 2012 at 05:49 PM (#4105249)
It will keep the black knight at bay...
   15. Greg (U)K Posted: April 12, 2012 at 05:55 PM (#4105251)
Last year we told you that Howard needed to get special permission to build a “moat” with his new home in Belleair Beach, Florida

What? No one told me! Journalism in this country is a joke.
   16. Greg (U)K Posted: April 12, 2012 at 06:03 PM (#4105256)
Also, since it's awesome and at least tangentally related...
Today I was reading about Venetian Bridge Wars. From around 1400-1700 working class Venetians would use sticks or just their fists in massive mock battles between the various sections of the city - either as a kind of popular culture carnival or organized by the city to show off to visiting dignitaries.

Yet another example of why the 17th century would be awesome to visit (as an honoured guest), but suck to live in.

EDIT: My thoughts on time travel run roughly parallel with Keira Knightley's I guess.
   17. Swedish Chef Posted: April 12, 2012 at 06:15 PM (#4105266)
Yet another example of why the 17th century would be awesome to visit (as an honoured guest), but suck to live in.

But 17th century Venice would be extremely dangerous even to visit for a curious historian like you. A stranger asking questions about Venice's power structures and class relations? Puzzling, but it's probably best to disappear him quietly.
   18. YR Misses Reggie Bars Posted: April 12, 2012 at 06:23 PM (#4105271)
Oh sure, when a black man wants to build it it's suddenly a lazy river.
   19. Greg (U)K Posted: April 12, 2012 at 06:27 PM (#4105275)
But 17th century Venice would be extremely dangerous even to visit for a curious historian like you. A stranger asking questions about Venice's power structures and class relations? Puzzling, but it's probably best to disappear him quietly.

That is the main problem posed by first-hand historical research. Most people in the 17th century are highly suspicious of people asking too many questions. For instance, I don't think I'd last long in 1620s London if I went around asking..."so what influence do you feel King James' practice of sodomy has on his claim to political authority?"
   20. Squash Posted: April 12, 2012 at 07:25 PM (#4105316)
or instance, I don't think I'd last long in 1620s London if I went around asking..."so what influence do you feel King James' practice of sodomy has on his claim to political authority?"

Yeah but you would have ducked The Plague. The 17th century had all sorts of awesome things happen within it ... it was the living example of the "stumbling toward enlightenment" quote.
   21. Jose Canusee Posted: April 12, 2012 at 09:20 PM (#4105345)
a bowling alley with breakaway walls.


Prince Fielder's doesn't have that but it does have human pins.
   22. puck Posted: April 12, 2012 at 10:42 PM (#4105366)
a bowling alley with breakaway walls.


What does that even mean? Does he want to host kids' birthday parties and then crash through the walls dressed like a pitcher of sugar water yelling "OH YEAH!!"
   23. andrewberg Posted: April 13, 2012 at 01:00 AM (#4105410)
a bowling alley with breakaway walls.


What does that even mean? Does he want to host kids' birthday parties and then crash through the walls dressed like a pitcher of sugar water yelling "OH YEAH!!"


Is there another reason to get rich?
   24. Greg (U)K Posted: April 13, 2012 at 04:09 AM (#4105418)
Yeah but you would have ducked The Plague. The 17th century had all sorts of awesome things happen within it ... it was the living example of the "stumbling toward enlightenment" quote.

Maybe not the Plague. But various plagues hit England pretty severely in the 17th century. One more or less shut down London in 1625.
   25. zonk Posted: April 13, 2012 at 09:03 AM (#4105454)
Is there another reason to get rich?


Better strippers...
   26. Misirlou is bad, he's nationwide Posted: April 13, 2012 at 09:31 AM (#4105469)
a bowling alley with breakaway walls.



What does that even mean? Does he want to host kids' birthday parties and then crash through the walls dressed like a pitcher of sugar water yelling "OH YEAH!!"



One possibility. The bowling alley could be situated below flood level, and by code, any home on or near the water with improvements below flood level must be constructed with breakaway walls so that in the case of a hurricane related storm surge, the walls fall away relieving stress on the overall structure. If that is the case, it's puzzling why one would include that information in a short article like this. It's just basic building code information. It would be like including "The home is equipped with a chef's kitchen with GFI outlets in the walls."
   27. Weekly Journalist_ Posted: April 13, 2012 at 11:40 AM (#4105613)
Man, real estate "big house" fetishism is something I just don't get. I live in a small house with one extra bedroom. We hardly ever go into it, ever. i guess I wouldn't mind a "sports bar" type room in my basement, but I like to go out to go to the sports bar anyway. That's the point. I can just sit on my couch with a beer if I want to stay in.

I guess if I were famous I'd want to be able to have more fun inside my house. Sounds like it sucks though.
   28. Squash Posted: April 13, 2012 at 12:23 PM (#4105650)
Maybe not the Plague. But various plagues hit England pretty severely in the 17th century. One more or less shut down London in 1625.

I was referring to the 1665-1666 variety - is that what you meant?
   29. Squash Posted: April 13, 2012 at 12:27 PM (#4105659)
Man, real estate "big house" fetishism is something I just don't get. I live in a small house with one extra bedroom. We hardly ever go into it, ever. i guess I wouldn't mind a "sports bar" type room in my basement, but I like to go out to go to the sports bar anyway. That's the point. I can just sit on my couch with a beer if I want to stay in.

I feel the same way. Most of the people I've known who have or build these huge places are all excited about them before they get in, then use all the stuff the first year or so they're in there, then it just becomes a huge house full of empty rooms for the next twenty.

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