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Wednesday, October 24, 2012

Freep: Tigers’ Justin Verlander neither confirms nor denies he’s dating Kate Upton

People shriek on the streets of Michigan when they see Verlander in person. He can’t stop at a gas pump or go grocery shopping. Everyone knows where he lives in the off-season (Troy), what he eats the night before he pitches (Taco Bell, for three crunchy Taco Supremes, a Cheesy Gordita Crunch and a Mexican Pizza, hold the tomatoes) and where he grabs his morning coffee.

Justin Verlander: wins Cy Youngs, dates supermodels, eats crap.

eddieot Posted: October 24, 2012 at 01:34 PM | 868 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: giants, tigers, verlander, world series

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   1. Jose Can Still Seabiscuit Posted: October 24, 2012 at 02:27 PM (#4281640)
I should be dating Kate Upton. Justin Verlander gets to be super awesome at baseball, if life is fair an overweight, middle aged guy like me should date Ms. Upton.
   2. Boxkutter Posted: October 24, 2012 at 02:43 PM (#4281668)
Jose can date her all he wants. She seems a little dense to me. But I still wouldn't mind hitting it once...
   3. Tim D Posted: October 24, 2012 at 02:49 PM (#4281676)
What a life. It must take a real competitive fire to kepp pushing when you have a Ferrari and Kate Upton. I don't have it and I don't know many who do.
   4. RJ in TO Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:00 PM (#4281696)
"I'm not confirming or denying anything," Verlander said, laughing and acknowledging that even his teammates are curious.

Then he's not dating her, because any man who was dating her would be confirming the living #### out of this story about ten times a day.
   5. vortex of dissipation Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:02 PM (#4281699)
I'm sure she's attractive in a conventional way, but if there's a definition of "not my type", she's it. Purely personal opinion, of course.
   6. Best Regards, President of Comfort, Esq. Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:04 PM (#4281703)
I have to say, Justin Verlander is one of the more likable players in baseball, IMO. I much prefer him winning awards and nailing hot models than Derek Jeter.
   7. McCoy Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:07 PM (#4281706)
At that level of beauty there is no such thing as "type". We ain't talking about marriage and kids here, folks!
   8. A big pile of nonsense (gef the talking mongoose) Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:10 PM (#4281713)
I much prefer him winning awards and nailing hot models than Derek Jeter.


I, too, have no desire to have Verlander nail Derek Jeter.

Or vice versa.
   9. Dingbat_Charlie Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:18 PM (#4281727)
I, too, have no desire to have Verlander nail Derek Jeter

Imagine the super-powered baseball offspring they'd produce!
   10. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:21 PM (#4281733)
I'm sure she's attractive in a conventional way, but if there's a definition of "not my type", she's it. Purely personal opinion, of course.


So you like fat chicks, eh?
   11. Jim (jimmuscomp) Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:25 PM (#4281744)
I had no idea who she was before this thread.

Whoa, Good for Justin.
   12. Barry`s_Lazy_Boy Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:27 PM (#4281748)
So you like fat chicks, eh?

As far as models go, Kate is pretty chunky.
   13. zachtoma Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:34 PM (#4281758)
"I'm not confirming or denying anything," Verlander said, laughing and acknowledging that even his teammates are curious.

Then he's not dating her, because any man who was dating her would be confirming the living #### out of this story about ten times a day.


Yeah, I agree. I never understood how this rumor started anyways, is it just 'cause they filmed one commercial for MLB 2k12 together? That's a long, long way from dating. Justin's trying to milk this for all it's worth.
   14. JJ1986 Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:36 PM (#4281759)
I thought this was just a BTF meme.
   15. Every Inge Counts Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:38 PM (#4281764)
Yeah, I agree. I never understood how this rumor started anyways, is it just 'cause they filmed one commercial for MLB 2k12 together? That's a long, long way from dating. Justin's trying to milk this for all it's wort


From July of this year:
The pair were spotted in Michigan last Thursday night where they attended an Aerosmith concert together.
The buxom blonde model was seen by many fans, watching the event from Verlander's private suit at the Palcace of Auburn Hills, according to the Huffington Post.

Verlander is awesome
   16. Ray (RDP) Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:38 PM (#4281765)
"I'm not confirming or denying anything," Verlander said


That is so gay.
   17. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:45 PM (#4281776)
watching the event from Verlander's private suit

Hmm, cozy! He must like his clothes baggy.
   18. Tim D Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:46 PM (#4281781)
Granddad confirmed it. Done deal. And if Kate Upton is not your type you are a straight female or a gay male.
   19. Fernigal McGunnigle has become a merry hat Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:54 PM (#4281792)
Granddad confirmed it. Done deal. And if Kate Upton is not your type you are a straight female or a gay male.


Well hell, I'm gay. This is surprising news. The missus is going to be pissed.
   20. Dan Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:55 PM (#4281796)
Granddad confirmed it. Done deal. And if Kate Upton is not your type you are a straight female or a gay male.


Personally I prefer women that actually have a waist and that don't have square hips. But maybe that's just me.
   21. franoscar Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:00 PM (#4281798)
Jeez! Do you guys all have small penises? (will the nanny let an anatomical term through?) I can't think what else would explain all this stupid braggadoccio (sp?).
   22. Lujack Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:00 PM (#4281800)
For all the Upton haters (not Albright):
link
   23. Voros McCracken of Pinkus Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:01 PM (#4281803)
The missus is going to be pissed.

I'm sure she's always suspected. :)
   24. Voros McCracken of Pinkus Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:05 PM (#4281807)
Here's a devil's bargain:

If you could be the best pitcher in baseball, make bazillions of dollars a year and have Kate Upton on your arm, but in return you had to eat Taco Bell three times every two weeks, would you do it?
   25. BDC Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:10 PM (#4281809)
The pair were spotted in Michigan last Thursday night where they attended an Aerosmith concert together

Sounds like a date to me. Either Verlander is splitting hairs à la Bill Clinton on the meaning of "'s", or he's succumbed to the not-so-gradual synonymization of "dating" with "having frequent sexual intercourse." Call me old-fashioned, but I liked having a word for "having an ice-cream together now and then while thinking about whether the relationship should go further."

Actually if they went to Aerosmith together, call them old-fashioned.
   26. andrewberg Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:11 PM (#4281812)
I thought this thread was going to turn into a pure Taco Bell thrashing. I find it most impressive that he is able to pitch at all the day after eating that. I wonder if he wears a diaper.
   27. Tim D Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:11 PM (#4281813)
"If you could be the best pitcher in baseball, make bazillions of dollars a year and have Kate Upton on your arm, but in return you had to eat Taco Bell three times every two weeks, would you do it?"

Uh, what's the catch? I'd even eat at McDonald's three times every week or more. Yes.
   28. Voros McCracken of Pinkus Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:13 PM (#4281820)
I dunno, I consider McDonald's to be ambrosia compared to Taco Bell. I suppose you could get by without eating anything with "meat" in it.
   29. Never Give an Inge (Dave) Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:16 PM (#4281825)
"If you could be the best pitcher in baseball, make bazillions of dollars a year and have Kate Upton on your arm, but in return you had to eat Taco Bell three times every two weeks, would you do it?"

Is she also eating Taco Bell three times every two weeks?
   30. BDC Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:16 PM (#4281826)
I dunno, Taco Bell is going to cause me to lose consortium for a day or two after every visit, which is going to cut down on the benefits of Kate Upton. Not to mention its effects on my ERA, though I suppose I could eat it after starts and have a few days to recover.
   31. Karl from NY Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:20 PM (#4281831)
Kate Upton's waist and lower half make her look like a mermaid. I'm still not sure whether that's a positive or not.
   32. JJ1986 Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:20 PM (#4281833)
Call me old-fashioned, but I liked having a word for "having an ice-cream together now and then while thinking about whether the relationship should go further."


This is called "talking" today.
   33. zonk Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:46 PM (#4281854)
If you could be the best pitcher in baseball, make bazillions of dollars a year and have Kate Upton on your arm, but in return you had to eat Taco Bell three times every two weeks, would you do it?


Hell, I'd do it without the pitching and bazillions... and I really hate Taco Bell.

I don't know that I have a 'type' per se, but I can dig voluptuous/curvy absolutely.

I think Kate Upton is fabulously attractive, perhaps #1 on my personal Billboard Top 100 at the moment... Other than everyone's mom, no one leaps to mind as a better choice for a single night of pure animal physicality....
   34. smileyy Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:52 PM (#4281866)
Puts a whole new perspective on "BJ Upton"
   35. Biff, highly-regarded young guy Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:52 PM (#4281867)
The pair were spotted in Michigan last Thursday night where they attended an Aerosmith concert together.

Well, there's some respect lost for Verlander. I would far rather eat Taco Bell as often as he does than go to even one Aerosmith concert. (Although if the option is attending an Aerosmith concert with Kate Upton, that obviously changes things.)
   36. My name is Votto, and I love to get blotto Posted: October 24, 2012 at 04:53 PM (#4281869)
The buxom blonde model was seen by many fans, watching the event from Verlander's private suit at the Palcace of Auburn Hills


That seems pretty personal. Was she Justin's pocket square or something?
   37. Mike Emeigh Posted: October 24, 2012 at 05:00 PM (#4281877)
I actually love this quote from Verlander's mother:

"It's a crying shame he's so good at everything. And if he's not good at something, he won't play. He knows we can beat him in Scrabble, so he won't play it."


I'm very much like that too :)

-- MWE
   38. Greg K Posted: October 24, 2012 at 05:13 PM (#4281905)
I'm very much like that too :)

Oddly enough I'm the opposite. I'm not a huge Scrabble fan, though I enjoy a game...I don't think I've ever won one though. Diplomacy and Chess are two of my favourite games. I've never won at Diplomacy. I have won at chess, though not in the last five years or so. I have two friends who I play chess with and they are both much better than me, so I'm 0 for my last 35 or so.

I'm not sure why, but I just love me a solid helping of losing.

On what might be a related note - my "type" usually has to exude a lack of confidence and a sense of being uncomfortable in their own skin. Poor posture is also great. It's tough to say through pictures, but this Upton character doesn't seem to have "it".
   39. geonose Posted: October 24, 2012 at 05:13 PM (#4281907)
And if Kate Upton is not your type you are a straight female or a gay male.

Your opinion only. I am neither and, sorry, she's not my type. I have yet to understand the obsession.

Frankly, I'm a bit disgusted that he dumped his longtime girlfriend - going back to his college days - for the latest blond bimbo the second she came along. It's such a stereotypical big time athlete move.
   40. The District Attorney Posted: October 24, 2012 at 05:15 PM (#4281911)
my "type" usually has to exude a lack of confidence and a sense of being uncomfortable in their own skin.
Why can't I find any personal ads like this?
   41. zonk Posted: October 24, 2012 at 05:24 PM (#4281917)

my "type" usually has to exude a lack of confidence and a sense of being uncomfortable in their own skin.
Why can't I find any personal ads like this?


This is why I hang out for dates outside therapists' offices... I find county jails are also good - bail bondsman get mad play of this sort, but it becomes very difficult to maintain financial stability.
   42. JuanGone..except1game Posted: October 24, 2012 at 05:38 PM (#4281929)
Frankly, I'm a bit disgusted that he dumped his longtime girlfriend - going back to his college days - for the latest blond bimbo the second she came along. It's such a stereotypical big time athlete move.


And why do you think most men want to be a "big time athlete"?
   43. andrewberg Posted: October 24, 2012 at 06:04 PM (#4281957)
Frankly, I'm a bit disgusted that he dumped his longtime girlfriend - going back to his college days - for the latest blond bimbo the second she came along. It's such a stereotypical big time athlete move.


So is driving a Ferrari 458 and that sounds pretty great too.
   44. Booey Posted: October 24, 2012 at 06:30 PM (#4281975)
If you could be the best pitcher in baseball, make bazillions of dollars a year and have Kate Upton on your arm, but in return you had to eat Taco Bell three times every two weeks, would you do it?


I've eaten Taco Bell thrice in two weeks many times, even without the bonus of being the best pitcher in baseball, having bazillions of dollars, or tapping Kate Upton. So I think the universe owes me the aforementioned perks big time...

Taco Bell ruins my innards every time I eat it and I spend most of the following day in the can, but for some reason I crave it anyway. I'm like a junkie but with trashy food rather than smack.
   45. McCoy Posted: October 24, 2012 at 06:42 PM (#4281982)
I haven't had Taco Bell in probably 10 years or so. I think God places a limit to how much Taco Bell you can eat before you start leaving parts of your intestines in the toilet and I, like many people, hit that mark in my teenage years.
   46. Ray (RDP) Posted: October 24, 2012 at 06:45 PM (#4281987)
Frankly, I'm a bit disgusted that he dumped his longtime girlfriend - going back to his college days - for the latest blond bimbo the second she came along. It's such a stereotypical big time athlete move.


Yes, better that he marries his longtime girlfriend and then cheats on her, rather than being honest with himself that he's not into her anymore and thereby sparing her that indignity.
   47. Never Give an Inge (Dave) Posted: October 24, 2012 at 07:05 PM (#4281996)
Frankly, I'm a bit disgusted that he dumped his longtime girlfriend - going back to his college days - for the latest blond bimbo the second she came along. It's such a stereotypical big time athlete move.

It seems presumptuous to assume that this is what happened.
   48. Ron J2 Posted: October 24, 2012 at 07:18 PM (#4282002)
I haven't eaten Taco Bell in quite a while. It's not a religious thing like so many in this thread. There were two of them semi-close to where I live and they're both gone.

But McCoy's comment in #45 is probably a good warning to me. I just can't eat the crap I used to without some pretty annoying consequences.
   49. Bourbon Samurai in Asia Posted: October 24, 2012 at 07:27 PM (#4282009)
If you could be the best pitcher in baseball, make bazillions of dollars a year and have Kate Upton on your arm, but in return you had to eat Taco Bell three times every two weeks, would you do it?


I would eat Taco Bell every day, while driving a yugo to and from the restaurant with Ann Coulter, Jay Mohr, and Mahmoud Ahmedinajad.
   50. Bourbon Samurai in Asia Posted: October 24, 2012 at 07:28 PM (#4282010)
I hate Taco Bell, yet I will happily drink coors light on purpose so to each their own.

Except for you guys saying Kate Upton isn't hot.
   51. jobu Posted: October 24, 2012 at 09:05 PM (#4282148)
Yes, Kate Upton would be incredibly horrible to "date" as this Terry Richardson video proves beyond a shadow of a doubt. Poor, poor Justin Verlander. He is 0-2 (and counting) in World Series games, he is a horrible All-Star game starting pitcher, and he is stuck with Kate Upton. Why must so much misery be borne by one mortal man.
   52. depletion Posted: October 24, 2012 at 09:20 PM (#4282197)
"It's a crying shame he's so good at everything. And if he's not good at something, he won't play. He knows we can beat him in Scrabble, so he won't play it."


Me, too. I used to play my wife in chess often. Then she beat me.
You know life is going well when you neither confirm nor deny that you're dating the swimsuit cover. 99.99% of guys would be calling every number in the book telling who they dated.
   53. Nats-Homer-in-DC Posted: October 24, 2012 at 11:18 PM (#4282613)
6. Best Regards, Larry M. Posted: October 24, 2012 at 03:04 PM (#4281703)
I much prefer him winning awards and nailing hot models than Derek Jeter.


Minka's hotter than Kate
   54. puck Posted: October 24, 2012 at 11:58 PM (#4282699)
Do you guys have sensitive stomachs? I haven't had Taco Bell in a few years, but I don't remember it doing anything to me. It's just fast food.
   55. Never Give an Inge (Dave) Posted: October 25, 2012 at 01:11 AM (#4282726)
Minka's hotter than Kate

Even if I agreed, this is one area where you need to park-adjust for Detroit vs. New York
   56. tshipman Posted: October 25, 2012 at 01:44 AM (#4282734)
Do you guys have sensitive stomachs? I haven't had Taco Bell in a few years, but I don't remember it doing anything to me. It's just fast food.


People always say this about Taco Bell and I don't get it. Have they never eaten Indian food in their lives? Do I just have the strongest stomach in the world?

And yes, on the Taco Bell question. I would have a double decker taco every day.
   57. RMc's desperate, often sordid world Posted: October 25, 2012 at 05:07 AM (#4282746)
Justin Verlander: wins Cy Youngs, dates supermodels, eats crap, gets slaughtered in his team's biggest game of the year.

Fixed.
   58. NJ in DC (Now unemployed!) Posted: October 25, 2012 at 06:24 AM (#4282760)
I'm always surprised that, generally speaking, white guys like Kate Upton as much as they seem to because she IS on the thicker side as far as "model" standards. I also agree that she's not perfect or anything, but some of the posts on this thread are kind of funny, she's clearly outstanding, as proven by my memorization of every second of her doing the Cat Daddy.

P.S.: Whoever said Minka was better is also right, but...c'mon, it's Minka, no fair.
   59. Shooty Survived the Shutdown of '14! Posted: October 25, 2012 at 07:02 AM (#4282764)
Kate Upton has incredible breasts. There, I said it.

People always say this about Taco Bell


I don't get diarrhea from Taco Bell, it just makes me feel bloated and unwell. As a teenager I lived off it but no more, alas. I try it again once every year or so and I always regret giving into the nostalgia.
   60. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 25, 2012 at 07:43 AM (#4282768)
Do I just have the strongest stomach in the world?


I think there's more to it than that. I can't eat McDonald's, Burger King or even Subway anymore without getting the shits, but I've never had any problem with Indian food or real Mexican food.
   61. Tim Wallach was my Hero Posted: October 25, 2012 at 08:42 AM (#4282797)
And if Kate Upton is not your type you are a straight female or a gay male.


I can name hundreds of women (famous or not) I find WAY more attractive than her. She has the hips of ten year-old girl, the kind of fake blond hair I really don't care about, and I don't like her breasts for reasons I can't explain on a public forum. All she has, to me anyway, is a really nice smile.

Personally I prefer women that actually have a waist and that don't have square hips.


This.



   62. Howie Menckel Posted: October 25, 2012 at 08:53 AM (#4282800)

"eating Taco Bell"

is that what the kids are calling it these days?

   63. Bitter Mouse Posted: October 25, 2012 at 08:54 AM (#4282801)
Yes I would eat Taco Bell as often as needed (put me in the camp that it doesn't bother me, but I don't eat there often so it might have changed).

And yes she (K Upton) is very attractive. For me there are two scales - real person scale and model/actress scale. She is (obviously) at the top (or past) on the real person scale, on the fantasy scale she is "merely" very nice. Oddly Beyonce has never done it for me, though clearly she is gorgeous, so sometimes even for fantasy women one is left cold for no particular reason.

On the other side of the gender scale the Brad Pitt perfume commercial on during the game reminded me how sexy that guy is. I don't swing that way and even I could see why most women go crazy over him.
   64. JJ1986 Posted: October 25, 2012 at 09:07 AM (#4282806)
eh, deleted.

Beyonce is much hotter than Kate Upton.
   65. Harveys Wallbangers Posted: October 25, 2012 at 09:34 AM (#4282823)
once upon a time joe dimaggio dated a blond bombshell almost half his age. that made the news too

it makes for good copy

   66. Bitter Mouse Posted: October 25, 2012 at 09:37 AM (#4282828)
Beyonce is much hotter than Kate Upton.


Many people agree. And Beyonce is truly lovely, but for some reason she does nothing for me. I have no idea why and admit it is bizarre. I bet in real life I would not say no though, so I might be a fraud on the issue.
   67. NJ in DC (Now unemployed!) Posted: October 25, 2012 at 09:40 AM (#4282830)
Many people agree. And Beyonce is truly lovely, but for some reason she does nothing for me. I have no idea why and admit it is bizarre. I bet in real life I would not say no though, so I might be a fraud on the issue

Racist.
   68. The Good Face Posted: October 25, 2012 at 09:52 AM (#4282845)
People always say this about Taco Bell and I don't get it. Have they never eaten Indian food in their lives? Do I just have the strongest stomach in the world?


Taco Bell isn't vile because of what it does to the digestion; it's vile because it both looks and tastes like something salvaged from a dumpster.

Many people agree. And Beyonce is truly lovely, but for some reason she does nothing for me. I have no idea why and admit it is bizarre. I bet in real life I would not say no though, so I might be a fraud on the issue.


Beyonce is not attractive by celebrity standands at all. Period. It's OK to admit it.
   69. Harveys Wallbangers Posted: October 25, 2012 at 10:01 AM (#4282857)
well if we are being shallow and discussing celebrity attractiveness among females the line starts at ava gardner
   70. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 25, 2012 at 10:07 AM (#4282864)
Brad Pitt perfume commercial on during the game reminded me how sexy that guy is. I don't swing that way and even I could see why most women go crazy over him.


You mean your first reaction wasn't incredulous laughter? That is the most pretentious commercial in the history of television.

And Beyonce certainly has sex appeal, but on looks she's nothing great. The only culture in which I struggle to find any beauty at all are Australian Aborigines, and possibly Khalahari Bushmen pygmies. Other than them, I believe I've seen at least one woman that I find extremely beautiful. There is a Somali woman who works in my building that has the most flawless face I've ever seen.
   71. The Chronicles of Reddick Posted: October 25, 2012 at 10:15 AM (#4282870)
after last night ,Kate Upton might have dumped Verlander.
   72. NJ in DC (Now unemployed!) Posted: October 25, 2012 at 10:22 AM (#4282874)
And Beyonce certainly has sex appeal, but on looks she's nothing great.

I think of her in exactly the opposite fashion.

well if we are being shallow and discussing celebrity attractiveness among females the line starts at ava gardner

This reminds me of something that happened at work yesterday. We were out for an office happy hour and Co-Worker A mentioned Co-Worker B having a daughter who also works here. Co-Worker C, a male, immediately reacted. Co-Worker D, a female, asked Co-Worker C if Co-Worker B’s daughter was attractive. Co-Worker C was effusive in his praise of Co-Worker B’s daughter’s attractiveness. Co-Worker D immediately reacted with disgust and derision towards the comments. This, despite the fact that at a previous lunch Co-Worker D spent a good 5 minutes extolling the physical virtues of one of the male co-workers in another of our offices.
   73. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 25, 2012 at 10:44 AM (#4282901)
Harv, if you're going back to the vault, my pick is Grace Kelly. That women's face was perfection. Gardner was no slouch though.
   74. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 25, 2012 at 10:45 AM (#4282904)
This, despite the fact that at a previous lunch Co-Worker D spent a good 5 minutes extolling the physical virtues of one of the male co-workers in another of our offices.


What, you weren't aware of the male/female double standard?
   75. JJ1986 Posted: October 25, 2012 at 10:59 AM (#4282914)
Is Co-Worker B's daughter attractive?
   76. Johnny Sycophant-Laden Fora Posted: October 25, 2012 at 10:59 AM (#4282915)
Beyonce is much hotter than Kate Upton.

Many people agree. And Beyonce is truly lovely, but for some reason she does nothing for me. I have no idea why and admit it is bizarre. I bet in real life I would not say no though, so I might be a fraud on the issue.


After a very unscientific bit of 5 minute research- putting both names in Google Images search engine...

I'm calling it a draw
   77. Yeaarrgghhhh Posted: October 25, 2012 at 11:07 AM (#4282918)
Ava Gardner was obviously beautiful, but I've never understood the devotion she inspired. From that era I prefer Bacall.
   78. Booey Posted: October 25, 2012 at 11:16 AM (#4282923)
I'd take Olivia Wilde, Zooey Deschanel, Natalie Portman, or Katy Perry over Kate Upton any day. And Mila Kunis if she had a more shapely body. Her face is nice.

Upton (and Carrie Underwood) are actually a lot cuter than I find most blondes, though. I tend to think the majority of them have very plain faces. Gwyneth Paltrow and Kirsten Dunst are two of the least attractive supposedly hot celebrities I can think of.
   79. jobu Posted: October 25, 2012 at 11:23 AM (#4282927)
Gwyneth Paltrow and Kirsten Dunst are two of the least attractive supposedly hot celebrities I can think of.


I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will. She is the kind of woman that women think (or perhaps wish) that men found attractive. She's passable on a normal-person scale, and not even in measuring range for the fantasy scale. So, in other words, you are not wrong on the "least attractive" dimension, but you probably are on the "supposedly hot" dimension.

   80. Tippecanoe Posted: October 25, 2012 at 11:24 AM (#4282928)
The rankings of female pulchritude in this thread are way too subjective for this website. It's all scouting, no data.

Maybe someone should set up a Hall of Merit, with a nice rigorous voting structure. Any recommendations for defining "replacement level" and "5-tool player" are welcome.
   81. NJ in DC (Now unemployed!) Posted: October 25, 2012 at 11:25 AM (#4282929)
I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will

Agreed. Same with Dunst.
   82. jobu Posted: October 25, 2012 at 11:32 AM (#4282935)
   83. The Good Face Posted: October 25, 2012 at 11:39 AM (#4282946)
I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will

Agreed. Same with Dunst.


They're both attractive by ordinary human standards, but by celebrity standards, I agree. Absolutely nothing special there.
   84. jacksone (AKA It's OK...) Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:12 PM (#4282977)
I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will.


I think she is very attractive. Her and Amy Smart are not my typical but I would love to rail them. Mila Kunis is fantastic, as is Kazooey Descherry, Portman just doesn't do it for me though, way too skinny.
   85. billyshears Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:15 PM (#4282981)
Zooey Deschanel


I've seen her on the subway. She is normal person pretty, which I guess is kind of her thing.

I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will

Agreed. Same with Dunst.


I swear that we're close to exhausting the list of female celebrities that I have seen in person, but I can confirm that neither Dunst nor Paltrow is especially attractive in real life. I have always found Dunst to be very attractive in the movies though.
   86. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:38 PM (#4282997)
Her and Amy Smart


Amy Smart is sexy as hell. Not overly pretty, but she does it for me. I've also always been a big Gwyneth fan, but I think that may have more to do with her voice and pattern of speech than her looks.
   87. SoSH U at work Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:39 PM (#4282999)
I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will.


I thought the younger Paltrow (pre-Shakespeare) was absolutely stunning. Dunst is hit or miss, looking quite attractive in some things and not so much in others.

Kate Upton is pretty (certainly more attractive than any woman I could expect to be with, my lovely wife excepted), but I don't find her nearly as attractive as many other actress/celebrity types.

Then again, I long ago reconciled the idea that what I find physically attractive in the female species is not quite conventional. I'm OK with that.



   88. jobu Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:42 PM (#4283002)
I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will.

I think she is very attractive.


"Very attractive" is damning with faint praise when it comes to celebrities. Though I think it's a perfectly acceptable compliment when applied,say, to co-worker B's daughter.

Still waiting for someone to call Gwyneth Paltrow "hot."
   89. SoSH U at work Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:50 PM (#4283008)
Still waiting for someone to call Gwyneth Paltrow "hot."


"Absolutely stunning" wasn't enough for you?

Honestly, I stopped calling women "hot" a long time ago*, so you'll have to find someone else to deliver that particular compliment.

* I don't mind if anyone else uses it, but it personally makes me feel creepy.**

** Well, creepier than I ordinarily feel.


   90. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:50 PM (#4283009)
Still waiting for someone to call Gwyneth Paltrow "hot."


She was hot when she did that duet with Ceelo at some awards show when she was in the tight bodysuit writhing on the piano.... but then again, a bloated, painted up Xtina looks hot next to Ceelo.
   91. JJ1986 Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:51 PM (#4283010)
Currently, I think Krysten Ritter is the hottest thing on two (very long) legs.
   92. jacksone (AKA It's OK...) Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:52 PM (#4283012)

"Very attractive" is damning with faint praise when it comes to celebrities. Though I think it's a perfectly acceptable compliment when applied,say, to co-worker B's daughter.

Still waiting for someone to call Gwyneth Paltrow "hot."


I think her face is stunningly gorgeous. He body is too thin for my ideal, but her face makes up for it.
   93. Booey Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:53 PM (#4283013)
I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will. She is the kind of woman that women think (or perhaps wish) that men found attractive.

She dated Brad Pitt back in the late 90's or early 2000's or whenever it was. I do think she was considered pretty hot back then.

But I think you might be right about her being the type of woman that other women THINK every guy wants rather than what the guys themselves actually want, though. Tall, skinny, blonde, etc. My ex wife thought Paltrow was the hottest woman in the world and never believed me when I repeatedly swore that I didn't.

I have never talked to a guy that thought that Gwyneth Paltrow was hot, and I doubt I ever will

Agreed. Same with Dunst.


Why would she get leading lady roles in blockbusters like Spiderman if not to try and appeal to the young male audience? I also remember seeing her on the cover of Maxim magazine once. I'm pretty sure she was considered hot by many, else neither of these things would've happened.
   94. BDC Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:54 PM (#4283015)
Zooey Deschanel

I've seen her on the subway


Deschanel walked past me into a Soho boutique last summer. I said to La Dernière, after a decent interval, "that was Zooey Deschanel!" She said, "Who's Zooey Deschanel?"

Finding film images of women attractive is an odd business, given the immortality of visual data these days. I admit to having a crush on Ida Lupino in High Sierra, but that was seventy years ago, and Lupino has been dead for twenty of them.

Having admitted that I am not immune to beautiful screen women, though (yeah, Ingrid Bergman is another), I will say one thing that I've actually found odd about my 50-something self. I am a huge, and shallow, fan of both CSI and The X-Files, and I think that Marg Helgenberger and Gillian Anderson are very attractive (as those shows portray them, enhanced by Helgenberger's character's apparent license to wear bizarrely form-fitting and skimpy clothing to her job). But as many hundreds of hours as I've devoted to watching both shows over the years, I found myself right from the start being rather uninterested in their attractiveness (or perhaps just processing it with a separate and very minor part of my self). Instead I identify with the characters – both are rationalists who are frustrated by an emotional world and by their own unpredictable emotions. I always want them to solve the case. Why am I not just sitting in front of the TV drooling at them? What does this say about how our culture has changed since The Avengers or Charlie's Angels or whatever? I am at a loss.
   95. JJ1986 Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:54 PM (#4283016)
Dunst has a really winning smile. She's much better looking in motion than in pictures.
   96. Booey Posted: October 25, 2012 at 12:55 PM (#4283017)
Amy Smart is sexy as hell. Not overly pretty, but she does it for me.


Agreed. Down to earth cute. Add her to my short list of blondes I'd make an exception for.
   97. McCoy Posted: October 25, 2012 at 01:00 PM (#4283022)
Dunst was the it girl for teeny boppers and young 20 somethings. Now that she's moved out of that demographic she's lost her luster just like most boy bands and girl singers lose their audience when they and their audience grow up.
   98. Booey Posted: October 25, 2012 at 01:06 PM (#4283030)
Honestly, I stopped calling women "hot" a long time ago*, so you'll have to find someone else to deliver that particular compliment.

* I don't mind if anyone else uses it, but it personally makes me feel creepy.**


For me, it depends on my age versus theirs. Paltrow is older than me, so if I found her hot I'd have no problem saying so (well, unless a woman is TOO old). But at 33, I think I'm almost to the point where I might feel a little creepy calling an 18 year old hot.
   99. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 25, 2012 at 01:09 PM (#4283032)
Dunst is the Cesar Cedeno / Vada Pinson of Hollywood. Peaked very early. She can be downright homely without makeup now.
   100. McCoy Posted: October 25, 2012 at 01:11 PM (#4283035)
Dunst is the Cesar Cedeno / Vada Pinson of Hollywood. Peaked very early. She can be downright homely without makeup now.

This statement could be applied to probably 99% of the female population that isn't between the ages of 16 and 28 or so.
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