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Monday, November 11, 2013

Grantland: Who will be the face of baseball’s steroid era: Bud Selig or Alex Rodriguez?

That The Greatest Scandal That Absolutely Ever Was has come down to a faceoff between Rodriguez and Selig is proof enough of what a comic opera the whole escapade has been from the beginning. The hysteria over PEDs in baseball — and, thus, in every sport — has unfolded the way in which all drug hysterias in the history of this country have unfolded. It has been fueled by misplaced moral panic, anecdotal evidence, anonymous slander, and a fundamental disregard for legal and constitutional safeguards — all in the service of what has been sold as a greater good by executives and media members who became famous or wealthy in the pursuit. It has been an exercise in simplistic moralism, so why shouldn’t it come down to one villain and one hero? The whole thing has been a scary story for children right from the jump.

Goodnight vials of pee and blood
Goodnight verdicts that are duds
Goodnight spokesmen flinging mud
Goodnight Rod
Goodnight Bud

Gonfalon Bubble Posted: November 11, 2013 at 08:05 PM | 18 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: a-rod, selig, steroids

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   1. Yastrzemski in left. Posted: November 11, 2013 at 10:30 PM (#4598433)
Why, the Centaur of course.
   2. Never Give an Inge (Dave) Posted: November 11, 2013 at 10:36 PM (#4598436)

Barry Bonds
   3. Never Give an Inge (Dave) Posted: November 11, 2013 at 10:36 PM (#4598437)
A-Rod will be the face, Bud will be the horse's ###.

EDIT: I expected the last word there to be nannied.
   4. AROM Posted: November 11, 2013 at 11:09 PM (#4598452)
The only objective answer is Manny Ramirez. Who else was roided up enough to earn 2 suspensions?
   5. cardsfanboy Posted: November 11, 2013 at 11:12 PM (#4598453)
Who else was roided up enough to earn 2 suspensions?


Bartolo Colon....the face of steroids is basically Cartman with his weight gain 4000....

edit:my bad, for some reason I thought Colon was hit with 2 suspensions.....
   6. Bob Tufts Posted: November 11, 2013 at 11:36 PM (#4598473)
I do not know who will be the face, but Mike Piazza will surely be the back of the steroid era.
   7. ptodd Posted: November 12, 2013 at 01:11 AM (#4598488)
Bud profited from the steroid era as much as anyone, and his 30 pigeons. It is Orwellian how the man who had the most to do with the steroid era and juiced ball comes across today as the leader in the War on Steroids, a war foisted upon him by Congressional pressure to do something or risk congressional intervention, and whose only casualties seem to be aging ball players with inflated contracts OR who are soon to be free agents and who will have their market value reduced OR low paid nobodies with minimal surplus value OR a few rare case like Braun who was suspended in a year his team was going nowhere.

Cansceco, Mcguire, Clemens, Giambi and Bonds were as much of if not more of a face than Arod was IMO.
   8. SouthSideRyan Posted: November 12, 2013 at 01:54 AM (#4598494)
Neifi was the first major leaguer to get 2 suspensions.
   9. Mellow Mouse, Benevolent Space Tyrant Posted: November 12, 2013 at 07:56 AM (#4598510)
I honestly can't tell if steroids as a "scandal" is dying, or I have become even less caring about it than I was. That said it will likely be Home Run King Barry Bonds, assuming anyone still cares in a few years.
   10. Fancy Pants with a clinging marmoset on his Handle Posted: November 12, 2013 at 08:12 AM (#4598516)
I do not know who will be the face, but Mike Piazza will surely be the back of the steroid era.

I am trying to make a comeback along those lines using Barry Bonds' hat size, but I can't quite make one work. Maybe i need more coffee...
   11. AROM Posted: November 12, 2013 at 08:22 AM (#4598518)
The Ultimate Roider is a composite:

Jose Canseco's face
Barry Bonds' skull
Manny Ramirez's dreads
Mark McGwire's chest and arms
Bartolo Colon's gut
Rafael Palmeiro's fingers
The speedy legs of Alex Sanchez
And A-Rod's horse butt
   12. dejarouehg Posted: November 12, 2013 at 08:26 AM (#4598520)
Why limit it to just those 2?

They can have their own Mt Rushmore.

My vote: Selig/Bonds/Canseco/Orza

Mt Back-UP: Manfred/McGwire/Arod/Congress
Dishonorable Mention: Caminitti & Fehr

Honorable Mention: Rick Helling

   13. shoewizard Posted: November 12, 2013 at 08:36 AM (#4598527)
, so why shouldn’t it come down to one villain and one hero?


Wait...so which is the villian and which is the hero ?
   14. Lassus Posted: November 12, 2013 at 08:39 AM (#4598528)
My vote: Selig/Bonds/Canseco/giant mirror

As they say -
   15. Jefferson Manship (Dan Lee) Posted: November 12, 2013 at 08:55 AM (#4598533)
The Mt. Rushmore is obviously Nook Logan/F.P. Santangelo/Hal Morris/Tim Laker.
   16. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) Posted: November 12, 2013 at 09:33 AM (#4598550)
The Ultimate Roider is a composite:

Jose Canseco's face
Barry Bonds' skull
Manny Ramirez's dreads
Mark McGwire's chest and arms
Bartolo Colon's gut
Rafael Palmeiro's fingers
The speedy legs of Alex Sanchez
And A-Rod's horse butt


Roger Clemens' arm
Ken Caminiti's heart

But whose shrunken balls?
   17. Ivan Grushenko of Hong Kong Posted: November 12, 2013 at 11:06 AM (#4598604)
The Ultimate Roider is a composite:

Jose Canseco's face
Barry Bonds' skull
Manny Ramirez's dreads
Mark McGwire's chest and arms
Bartolo Colon's gut
Rafael Palmeiro's fingers
The speedy legs of Alex Sanchez
And A-Rod's horse butt


Roger Clemens' arm
Ken Caminiti's heart

But whose shrunken balls?

If Palmeiro's allowed to donate twice, I'd pick his balls
   18. eddieot Posted: November 12, 2013 at 01:59 PM (#4598758)
RTFA. Pierce can surely write. What a pleasure to read next to the many sports hacks usually linked here.

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