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Monday, March 05, 2012

Lenny Dykstra Sentenced to 3 Years in CA Prison

Former New York Mets outfielder Lenny Dykstra was sentenced Monday to three years in state prison in a grand theft auto case.

Los Angeles County Superior Court Judge Cynthia Ulfig sentenced Dykstra after refusing to allow him to withdraw a no-contest plea.

The judge said the theft scheme showed sophistication and extensive planning.

Dykstra was immediately remanded to custody and he walked into the court’s back room, hands in his pockets.

Dykstra, 49, initially pleaded not guilty to 25 counts after police arrested him and found cocaine, Ecstasy and synthetic human growth hormone at his Los Angeles home last April.

Thanks to The Heirens Set!.

Repoz Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:16 PM | 45 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: history

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   1. oscar gamble's afro pick Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:20 PM (#4074429)
The judge said the theft scheme showed sophistication and extensive planning.


then clearly they got the wrong man...
   2. snapper (history's 42nd greatest monster) Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:20 PM (#4074431)
California Penal League MVP, #######!
   3. Monty Predicts a Padres-Mariners WS in 2016 Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:23 PM (#4074435)
This isn't as funny as the usual Dykstra update.
   4. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:24 PM (#4074438)
Whoda predicted that of all the '86 Mets, Dykstra would do the most jail time?
   5. zonk Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:24 PM (#4074439)
That's ashtray jailtime, bro!
   6. Guapo Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:25 PM (#4074442)
Hopefully he turns his life around.

I like the following sequence of posts on twitter, from November:

@berniecrack herman is a penny pinching jew gold hoarding kid trying to put me back in the cooler bro #danherman


Followed two days later by the following:

my statements about were herman taken out of context, like the media always has
   7. The Piehole of David Wells Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:27 PM (#4074444)
Mess with the hammer and you get nailed?
   8. The Piehole of David Wells Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:32 PM (#4074453)
Whoda predicted that of all the '86 Mets, Dykstra would do the most jail time?


And we're just getting started. There are still all of those federal crimes he's on the hook for. Going to trial this summer. He may be in jail for the next decade or more.
   9. The Yankee Clapper Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:33 PM (#4074456)
Only 3 years? Disappointing.

EDIT: #8 gives me hope!
   10. zonk Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:36 PM (#4074461)
This isn't as funny as the usual Dykstra update.


I don't know... if you RTFA -- you get a rather complete airing of the various crimes of Dykstra... from multiple instances of fraud, the police finding cocaine, X, and HGH when they served the warrant to exposing himself to women he met on Craigslist -- then Lenny, in true Lenny form:

"I do have remorse for some of the things I've done," he said. "But because I wasn't a perfect person am I a criminal? Everyone wants to make me out to be a monster."


I mean, sure -- to date -- we're fairly certain he hasn't yet played in any role in any homicides... but there doesn't seem to be much beyond that left.
   11. silhouetted by the sea Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:38 PM (#4074465)
I have asked this before, but why is Lenny Dykstra never mentioned during steroid discussions. I can't think of s more obvious user.
   12. Nasty Nate Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:40 PM (#4074468)
I have asked this before, but why is Lenny Dykstra never mentioned during steroid discussions.


He is mentioned.
   13. Ephus Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:45 PM (#4074474)
These cases were just screaming for a plea deal. I do not see any plausible defense. Dykstra demanded to go to trial in both state and federal court, and now he could do time in both systems.
   14. The Long Arm of Rudy Law Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:46 PM (#4074477)
The federal trial is scheduled to begin June 5, but there have been three continuances already. It was originally scheduled for August 9, 2011. Dykstra had to get the court's permission to travel from Los Angeles to Florida for Gary Carter's memorial.
   15. snapper (history's 42nd greatest monster) Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:48 PM (#4074478)
I have asked this before, but why is Lenny Dykstra never mentioned during steroid discussions. I can't think of s more obvious user.

Because no one disputes that he used?
   16. Lars6788 Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:55 PM (#4074484)
He gets extra points for playing the game hard and scrappy - for all his misdeeds, he doesn't get tagged with a negative narrative as far as a player.

I have asked this before, but why is Lenny Dykstra never mentioned during steroid discussions. I can't think of s more obvious user.
   17. Tom Nawrocki Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:57 PM (#4074487)
So I guess his Players Club magazine isn't happening now.
   18. flournoy Posted: March 05, 2012 at 05:58 PM (#4074489)
Lenny Dykstra as a steroid user is a "water is wet," "sun rises in east" revelation. Everyone knows he did steroids.
   19. zonk Posted: March 05, 2012 at 06:01 PM (#4074498)
So I guess his Players Club magazine isn't happening now.


Trick out your cell!

Where to invest the pennies you get for stamping out license plates!

How to make it big in the cigarettes as currency market!
   20. The Piehole of David Wells Posted: March 05, 2012 at 06:03 PM (#4074499)
Trick out your cell!

Where to invest the pennies you get for stamping out license plates!

How to make it big in the cigarettes as currency market!


You missed the cover story:

"Kick ass or be someone's bitch?"

And "Top 10 secrets to pleasing your man"
   21. Boileryard Posted: March 05, 2012 at 06:04 PM (#4074503)
"But because I wasn't a perfect person am I a criminal?"

Call me crazy, but duping a car dealership and then driving off with three high-end cars that you have no intention of paying for sounds a lot like a criminal act.
   22. phredbird Posted: March 05, 2012 at 06:18 PM (#4074514)
last time we had a dykstra thread, someone pointed out that the players club magazine still had a website. don't feel like checking, but i wonder ...
   23. Willie Mayspedester Posted: March 05, 2012 at 06:35 PM (#4074537)
Lenny Dykstra as a steroid user is a "water is wet," "sun rises in east" revelation. Everyone knows he did steroids.


But in Moneyball he just "knew" he was a big leaguer.
   24. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: March 05, 2012 at 06:42 PM (#4074544)
I have asked this before, but why is Lenny Dykstra never mentioned during steroid discussions. I can't think of a more obvious user.

Career high: 19 HR. Sammy Sosa got that many taters from a single needle, plus he turned into Joel Grey!
   25. michaelplank has knowledgeable eyes Posted: March 05, 2012 at 07:06 PM (#4074571)
Maybe he can get Mookie Wilson to serve time against lefthanders.
   26. ckash Posted: March 05, 2012 at 07:30 PM (#4074588)
"I do have remorse for some of the things I've done," he said. "But because I wasn't a perfect person am I a criminal? Everyone wants to make me out to be a monster."

I hear that every day from the people I can't hire because of their criminal convictions.
   27. PreservedFish Posted: March 05, 2012 at 08:05 PM (#4074608)
Every day? What are you, a bounty hunter?
   28. Drew (Primakov, Gungho Iguanas) Posted: March 05, 2012 at 08:10 PM (#4074611)
"I do have remorse for some of the things I've done," he said. "But because I wasn't a perfect person am I a criminal? Everyone wants to make me out to be a monster."


Could you find a more well-rounded criminal resume? He's done everything! Next he'll be found taking calls from Freddy W.
   29. willcarrolldoesnotsuk Posted: March 05, 2012 at 08:16 PM (#4074616)
Let he who has never duped a car dealership and then driven off with three high-end cars that he had no intention of paying for cast the first stone.
   30. Swedish Chef Posted: March 05, 2012 at 08:19 PM (#4074618)
I bet Lenny could use the free room and board right now.
   31. RJames Posted: March 05, 2012 at 08:30 PM (#4074628)
I love this part:

Dykstra's magazine will have articles by past players as well as professional journalists (former Mets player Keith Hernandez will serve as food critic).


This part is good too:

The magazine isn't just to show the players how to spend the massive amounts of money they earn but also how to keep their wealth and make smart decisions so they don't join the ranks of players who earn millions and wind up in financial trouble just a few years later. The case of Latrell Sprewell springs immediately to mind but there are many other instances of athletes who have earned enough money to be set for life but end up in financial trouble.
   32. RJames Posted: March 05, 2012 at 08:32 PM (#4074630)
last time we had a dykstra thread, someone pointed out that the players club magazine still had a website. don't feel like checking, but i wonder ...


This might help, phred:

Doubledown Media, the once-rising publisher of magazines aimed at the Wall Street elite, has shut down.

“These are unprecedented times,” president Randall Lane wrote in an e-mail to staffers late Monday night. “The combination of the media depression, the Wall Street implosion and the credit slowdown were collectively too much for our company—probably any company in our shoes—to overcome.”


Doubledown media. How do like that for a prophetic corporate title?

   33. just plain joe Posted: March 05, 2012 at 08:36 PM (#4074634)
Doubledown media. How do like that for a prophetic corporate title?


Doubledown media, Pete Rose would like a piece of that action.
   34. Los Angeles El Hombre of Anaheim Posted: March 05, 2012 at 08:39 PM (#4074636)
California Penal League MVP, #######!
We don't wear caps and sleeves on this level, son.
   35. Textbook Editor Posted: March 05, 2012 at 09:38 PM (#4074689)
One of my proudest mid-twenties achievements was beating Grand Theft Auto: Vice City without using cheat codes.
   36. flournoy Posted: March 05, 2012 at 10:04 PM (#4074709)
Out of curiosity, how do you drive off with three cars? I know Dykstra has dumb ideas, but trying to drive three cars at once seems unlikely.
   37. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: March 05, 2012 at 10:26 PM (#4074726)
If the estimates of Lenny's (er, ahem) "personal equipment" are accurate, he could surely drive the other two with one hand apiece.
   38. willcarrolldoesnotsuk Posted: March 05, 2012 at 11:03 PM (#4074735)
Out of curiosity, how do you drive off with three cars?
PEDs.
   39. Bob Evans Posted: March 05, 2012 at 11:18 PM (#4074742)
If the estimates of Lenny's (er, ahem) "personal equipment" are accurate, he could surely drive the other two with one hand apiece.

Just LOOKS bigger next to the shrunken stones.
   40. Tom Nawrocki Posted: March 05, 2012 at 11:39 PM (#4074750)
“These are unprecedented times,” president Randall Lane wrote in an e-mail to staffers late Monday night.


Randall Lane is now the editor of Forbes, so he's landed on his feet.
   41. zachtoma Posted: March 06, 2012 at 02:26 AM (#4074792)

"I do have remorse for some of the things I've done," he said. "But because I wasn't a perfect person am I a criminal? Everyone wants to make me out to be a monster."

I hear that every day from the people I can't hire because of their criminal convictions.


Huh? I don't understand your point. I think people who have served time and return to free society only to find themselves frozen out of all unemployment opportunities deserve a lot of empathy, it is an extremely unfair system. Lenny Dykstra, on the other hand, is ridiculous and delusional when he says those words.
   42. Fancy Pants Handles lap changes with class Posted: March 06, 2012 at 02:47 AM (#4074795)
I think people who have served time and return to free society only to find themselves frozen out of all unemployment opportunities deserve a lot of empathy


I would like to be frozen out of all unemployment opportunities...
   43. Morty Causa Posted: March 06, 2012 at 02:50 AM (#4074797)
Don't be a wish pig.
   44. Commissioner Bud Black Beltre Hillman Posted: March 06, 2012 at 02:51 AM (#4074798)
From TFA:

Dykstra said he didn't deserve to be put in jail on trumped-up charges and said he wasn't able to go to the funeral of his mother who died while he was incarcerated awaiting trial. He noted that he chose to go into a drug rehab center, volunteers his time with a college baseball team and has paid nearly $20 million in taxes.


"Your honor, I pay your salary"
   45. zachtoma Posted: March 06, 2012 at 04:59 AM (#4074806)
Doh

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