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Friday, April 28, 2006

Mainichi: Shinjo leaves the ballpark for a quiet life of nude modeling

Jeeeez…what, was his Helmut Newton on too tight?

“It was typical Shinjo. I wasn’t surprised at all,” baseball analyst Takenori Emoto tells Shukan Gendai, regarding the sudden retirement. “I think part of the reason there was so much showbiz in the announcement was that the entire Pacific League seemed to be caught up in Shinjo and he was basically running wild, doing whatever he wanted to. He didn’t give a damn about his team as long as he looked good.”

...While some may seem surprised at the suggestions of the Shinjos stripping, the likelihood is considered high when his previous outlandish behavior is taken into account. And, it shouldn’t be forgotten that Shinjo’s off-field resume already includes a successful stint promoting skimpy undies for major undergarment manufacturer Gunze.

Repoz Posted: April 28, 2006 at 04:15 AM | 80 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: giants, mets

Reader Comments and Retorts

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Statements posted here are those of our readers and do not represent the BaseballThinkFactory. Names are provided by the poster and are not verified. We ask that posters follow our submission policy. Please report any inappropriate comments.

   1. CraigK Posted: April 28, 2006 at 04:32 AM (#1993759)
And in other news, I found out that he won the top prize on Celebrity "Who Wants to Be a Millionaire".

Link (scroll down to Japanese winners)
   2. Hang down your head, Tom Foley Posted: April 28, 2006 at 04:35 AM (#1993761)
The hell?
   3. The Clarence Thomas of BBTF (scott) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:01 AM (#1993768)
oh Shinjo.

i will say this much, despite not being much with the stick, he had a pretty good glove. solid 4th OF.
   4. MM1f Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:04 AM (#1993770)
(insert Kaz Tadano joke here)
   5. We don't have dahlians at the Palace of Wisdom Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:14 AM (#1993772)
despite not being much with the stick,

Well then what's the point of nude modeling?!? I think you should double check your Pacific League Equivalencies.
   6. AJMcCringleberry Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:15 AM (#1993774)
Will he still wear the orange wristbands?
   7. The Clarence Thomas of BBTF (scott) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:26 AM (#1993779)

Well then what's the point of nude modeling?!? I think you should double check your Pacific League Equivalencies.


even compared to his countrymen, he doesn't carry a big stick. he compensates with other assets.
   8. We don't have dahlians at the Palace of Wisdom Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:27 AM (#1993781)
Will he still wear the orange wristbands?

I'd like him to keep sporting the Darth Vader mask.
   9. Brandon in MO (Yunitility Infielder) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:36 AM (#1993784)
   10. The Clarence Thomas of BBTF (scott) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:56 AM (#1993790)
that's not actually him, is it? if so, i think i've found my new boycrush.
   11. Ozzie's gay friend Posted: April 28, 2006 at 06:04 AM (#1993791)
He's pretty attractive, I'll be looking forward to the pics.

Anyone know if they're going to be full-frontal?
Nothing more disapointing than those "nude" shots that still leave bits to the imagination.
   12. The Clarence Thomas of BBTF (scott) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 06:24 AM (#1993796)
i wonder if his carpet is trimmed/styled? or if he just denudes it?

he's a cutey. but then, a lot of asian boys are.
   13. Grumbledook Posted: April 28, 2006 at 08:36 AM (#1993839)
The 2004 entry on Shinjo in Baseball Prospectus (covering 2003, his last year in MLB) compared Shinjo to an old girlfriend - one day, when the Mets were competitive again, Mets fans would think about how excited they used to get about Shinjo.

Well, it's 2006, and the Mets are making a concerted run at the division title, and I thought about Shinjo the other day - and now this happens.
   14. RMc's desperate, often sordid world Posted: April 28, 2006 at 11:18 AM (#1993849)
Where's Ila Borders when you really need her?
   15. Tim Wallach was my Hero Posted: April 28, 2006 at 11:52 AM (#1993858)
Shinjo leaves the ballpark for a quiet life of nude modeling

Well, I just hope Shinjo won't give this idea to other future retired players. Can you imagine Randy Jonhson... Ok, enough said.
   16. Sam M. Posted: April 28, 2006 at 12:09 PM (#1993864)
Well, I'm sure everyone has been waiting breathlessly for my contribution to this thread.

We wouldn't need all this nude modeling crap if we'd just play our professional sports ancient Greek style. Which, in turn, would turn every gay man in North America into a huge baseball fan overnight. (Football? Nah -- a bunch of 330 pound flabby linemen are not my idea of a reason to invest in season tickets and a zoom lens.) Selig and Loria want to improve attendance and get a new stadium built in South Florida? Nude baseball's the ticket, I'm telling you. You'll have state-of-the-art stadiums up in SoBe and on Los Olas in Fort Lauderdale in 18 months; each one will have a dome AND luxury suites with mirrors on the ceiling and video set-ups that would make jaws drop at Langley. Gabe Kapler would become the most sought-after free agent in history, only to be topped (ahem) shortly thereafter by Pat Burrell.

Shinjo. A few snapshots. Hah! Yet again, baseball not thinking about the big picture.
   17. HCO Posted: April 28, 2006 at 12:24 PM (#1993869)
I always figured David Wells would be the first player to make this move.
   18. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 12:37 PM (#1993874)
Gabe Kapler would become the most sought-after free agent in history, only to be topped (ahem) shortly thereafter by Pat Burrell.

If they all played nekkid, Sam, you might find your priorities changing a bit.
   19. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 12:38 PM (#1993875)
That is, unless you know something we don't about Kapler and Burrell.
   20. Spahn Insane Posted: April 28, 2006 at 12:41 PM (#1993877)
Or Joey Meyer.
   21. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 28, 2006 at 12:41 PM (#1993878)
Sam:

I take it you haven't considered the headfirst slide implications.

Best Regards

John
   22. Repoz Posted: April 28, 2006 at 12:48 PM (#1993881)
I take it you haven't considered the headfirst slide implications.

That might be called a gooden' strawberry to Sam...:")
   23. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:04 PM (#1993893)
I take it you haven't considered the headfirst slide implications.

Reet! Kapler's so hairy he'd slide ten feet past the base.

That is what you meant, right?
   24. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:05 PM (#1993894)
That might be called a gooden' strawberry to Sam...:")

Or a Nipple Jones.
   25. Sam M. Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:24 PM (#1993901)
If they all played nekkid, Sam, you might find your priorities changing a bit.

That is, unless you know something we don't about Kapler and Burrell.


Great bodies are always a priority, no matter what else might be . . . disclosed by further investigation.

I take it you haven't considered the headfirst slide implications.

Since the head first slide is considered unsafe even under current conditions, my proposal has the additional benefit of pretty much guaranteeing that no player would ever do it again. I know I wouldn't. Too much riding on perfect execution.

And it's Burrell who's hairy. Doesn't Kapler still do the shave thing?
   26. My guest will be Jermaine Allensworth Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:38 PM (#1993906)
I take it you haven't considered the headfirst slide implications.

That's one way to contract the Twins.
   27. RP Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:39 PM (#1993908)
So...who are the 5 best looking players in the game today? Bottom 5?
   28. RP Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:40 PM (#1993909)
That's one way to contract the Twins.

You forgot to add <rimshot>.
   29. Russ Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:40 PM (#1993910)
This thread is gay.


;-)

I kid...
   30. Sam M. Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:45 PM (#1993914)
Bottom 5?

Personally, those would be the ones I'm interested in.
   31. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:49 PM (#1993918)
That's one way to contract the Twins.


Are we talking whether or not steroids have side effects again?

Best Regards

John
   32. Jeff K. Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:50 PM (#1993919)
Personally, those would be the ones I'm interested in.

This thread has already had two <rimshot> worthy moments.
   33. spike Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:51 PM (#1993920)
now THAT'S funny.
   34. sasquatch83 Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:51 PM (#1993921)
Why can't we have opening days with 4th outfielders dressed like Darth Vader?

I think it would have been a good way for Bernie Williams to close out his career.
   35. Mister High Standards Posted: April 28, 2006 at 01:56 PM (#1993927)
The worst thread ever.
   36. CFiJ Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:02 PM (#1993940)
Hmmm... I trying to work out the Nude Calculus. Is it worth seeing nude pictures of Shinjo to see pictures of his hot wife? Hmmmm....

Anyone know if they're going to be full-frontal?

Absolutely not. Photographs of actual genitilia are against the law in Japan.
   37. Sam M. Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:06 PM (#1993943)
The worst thread ever.

Well, aren't we just Mr. High Standards!

Oh . . .
   38. RP Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:06 PM (#1993945)
No...we need far more threads like this. It reminds me of the old primer.
   39. RP Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:10 PM (#1993947)
Absolutely not. Photographs of actual genitilia are against the law in Japan.

That's interesting. Doesn't Japan have a long history of pretty graphic illustrated porn (woodblock prints, anime, etc.)? Why the distinction between photos and illustrations?
   40. HCO Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:17 PM (#1993957)
Photographs of actual genitilia are against the law in Japan.

But bukkake is legal!
   41. Lujack Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:23 PM (#1993962)
I take it you haven't considered the headfirst slide implications.


Bangkok?
   42. Cris E Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:37 PM (#1993979)
This actually looks normal when you look at what other upcoming retirees are doing with their free time. For example, Roger Clemens has already started his new life off by buzzing his son in BP. And Rickey is spending his life after baseball, um, playing baseball. Darren Daulton has checked in recently, to mixed reviews. So it could be worse: at least this produces some entertainment for everyone.

-
   43. Cris E Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:38 PM (#1993981)
And of course by 'upcoming' I mean 'review before posting'.
   44. CFiJ Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:43 PM (#1993987)
That's interesting. Doesn't Japan have a long history of pretty graphic illustrated porn (woodblock prints, anime, etc.)? Why the distinction between photos and illustrations?

Woodblock prints, yes, porn, no.

The distinction is not between photos and illustrations, but Pre-Meiji Era vs. Post-Meiji Era. In the rush to modernize, Japan outlawed graphic depictions of sex and genitilia as obscene. It was the Victorian Era, after all.
   45. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 28, 2006 at 02:47 PM (#1993990)
# Lujack Posted: April 28, 2006 at 10:23 AM (#1993962)

I take it you haven't considered the headfirst slide implications.

Bangkok?


Dude, it's baseball so it'd be Bangkok9.

Best Regards

John
   46. HCO Posted: April 28, 2006 at 03:55 PM (#1994059)
The naked headfirst slide seems like less of a threat to the genitals than to the torso and legs.
   47. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 03:57 PM (#1994060)
Doesn't Kapler still do the shave thing?

Ohhh, yeah, may-beeee. He could wait until a later moment to slide. The stubble would have gripping power, kind of like Spiderman's fingers.
   48. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:10 PM (#1994142)
That ain't web fluid buddy.

Best Regards

John
   49. phredbird Posted: April 28, 2006 at 05:41 PM (#1994180)
one of the rare repoz intros i got without having to go to google.
   50. Ozzie's gay friend Posted: April 28, 2006 at 06:51 PM (#1994315)

Absolutely not. Photographs of actual genitilia are against the law in Japan.


that sucks.

Oh well, even if it was full frontal, it probably would have been fairly softcore (i.e. no erection).
   51. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 28, 2006 at 06:53 PM (#1994319)
...of a man named Hung Lo.

Best Regards

John
   52. Mattbert Posted: April 28, 2006 at 07:08 PM (#1994342)
That ain't web fluid buddy.
I don't know, all those pictures at tobeyfan.com can have that sort of effect on a guy...
   53. DCW3 Posted: April 28, 2006 at 07:14 PM (#1994347)
Absolutely not. Photographs of actual genitilia are against the law in Japan.

Actual genitalia, eh? Then why not put out a press release stating that Shinjo's genitalia are artificial? Who's going to check?
   54. Francoeur Sans Gages (AlouGoodbye) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 07:17 PM (#1994351)
...of a man named Hung Lo.

I was friends at school with a guy called Justin Lo.

Seriously.
   55. Rich Posted: April 28, 2006 at 07:18 PM (#1994354)
This thread is a little gay.

NTTAWWT
   56. Francoeur Sans Gages (AlouGoodbye) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 07:21 PM (#1994361)
Also, is wikipedia accurate on Shinjo's stats? It gives him a career line in Japan of .253/.433/.306 - perhaps the strangest I've ever seen.
   57. DCW3 Posted: April 28, 2006 at 07:25 PM (#1994371)
Also, is wikipedia accurate on Shinjo's stats? It gives him a career line in Japan of .253/.433/.306 - perhaps the strangest I've ever seen.

Looking at the page, it looks like the just got the columns for OBP and SLG mixed up.
   58. Alex_Lewis Posted: April 28, 2006 at 07:51 PM (#1994423)
I'll give this to Shinjo - he was one of the best outfielders I've ever seen, with tremendous range an incredible arm. I'll never forget a throw he made against the Expos, from deep rightfield on the backup of a Marvin Bernard misplay (man, that seems like a long time ago!), to cut a man down at home plate.
   59. JMM Posted: April 28, 2006 at 08:23 PM (#1994463)
Marvin Bernard misplay

weren't they all?
   60. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 28, 2006 at 08:25 PM (#1994467)
I was friends at school with a guy called Justin Lo.


You went to school with J-Lo?

Best Regards

John
   61. Francoeur Sans Gages (AlouGoodbye) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 08:41 PM (#1994504)
You went to school with J-Lo?


Yes, that's what we nicknamed him. And this was decades before anyone heard of Jennifer Lopez. He was the original J-Lo.
   62. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 28, 2006 at 08:48 PM (#1994522)
If he ever became a male stripper he could be called "Option J-Lo."

Best Regards

John
   63. asinwreck Posted: April 28, 2006 at 09:02 PM (#1994550)
Upon first reading the headline, I thought Shingo Takatsu had a new career. Good thing it's not him, as it's not a good line of work for Mr. Zero.
   64. Backlasher Posted: April 28, 2006 at 09:54 PM (#1994591)
Shinjo. A few snapshots. Hah! Yet again, baseball not thinking about the big picture.


What were the final ratings on Women's Beach volleyball during the last Olympics?
   65. The Clarence Thomas of BBTF (scott) Posted: April 28, 2006 at 10:13 PM (#1994611)
this has become a fantastic thread.

i miss old primer, where the snark flowed freely.
   66. Ozzie's gay friend Posted: April 28, 2006 at 11:01 PM (#1994653)
It's nice to find other people who follow baseball in uh, 'more than one way'.

I write a semi-regular erotic baseball blog about my (fictional) travels as the official athletic cup fitter for MLB.

I'll email Repoz a link, maybe you guys could post an excerpt or something.
   67. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: April 29, 2006 at 01:07 AM (#1994989)
"Doesn't Japan have a long history of pretty graphic illustrated porn (woodblock prints, anime, etc.)?"

For an example of what he's talking about, click here (NSFW).
   68. 6 - 4 - 3 Posted: April 29, 2006 at 01:46 AM (#1995155)
I enjoyed Shinjo's one year with the Giants. He was a fun player to watch and root for, even though he wasn't very good. Basically the second-coming of Darren Lewis (in his early Giants days): outstanding defense and speed, but absolutely no conception of the strikezone and minimal power.

Had Baker batted him 8th rather than leadoff, he might have actually been a net positive (considering that the CF alternative was Calvin Murray or Tom Goodwin, until the Lofton acquisition).
   69. The Clarence Thomas of BBTF (scott) Posted: April 29, 2006 at 01:54 AM (#1995186)
yay outlaw josey reyes!
   70. The Clarence Thomas of BBTF (scott) Posted: April 29, 2006 at 01:58 AM (#1995218)
vlad: old school tentacle porn!

and wow, i posted that last one in the wrong place.
   71. base ball chick Posted: April 29, 2006 at 02:00 AM (#1995228)
a nekkid men thread

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

one nekkid baseball playing man = good. more nekkid baseball playin men = better. lots and LOTS of nekkid baseball players all over the field = paradise

hunh, sam...

but the gay male fans gonna hafta fight for good seats (hahahahaha) with us straight grrrls
   72. Sam M. Posted: April 29, 2006 at 02:38 AM (#1995377)
but the gay male fans gonna hafta fight for good seats (hahahahaha) with us straight grrrls

Nah. Gay men and straight women have been figuring out how to share this whole "how the #### do we deal with these men" crap for a while now. Give us nude sports, we'd figure out a way to do that together, too. Share some season tickets, dish on the players' equipment, we'd work it out. Meanwhile, all the straight guys would just have to deal with sharing their games with us while they looked but didn't like it one bit. Or said they didn't . . . .
   73. base ball chick Posted: April 29, 2006 at 03:28 AM (#1995461)
grinning

well sam,

i think all men like being, uh, appreciated.

i think it would be fun to go to a game with a gay guy and talk, um, other kinds of stats.

of course we would both like to be, um, the equipment manager....
   74. robinred Posted: April 29, 2006 at 05:30 PM (#1995704)
one nekkid baseball playing man = good. more nekkid baseball playin men = better. lots and LOTS of nekkid baseball players all over the field = paradise


I didn't read the new TOS in its entirety. What is the policy on posting nude? I know that it will impact Brattain, and maybe some others.
   75. base ball chick Posted: April 29, 2006 at 05:44 PM (#1995736)
the TOS???

well honey, its like this -

you gotta post with G rated words

but it don't say you can't post with an x rated mind. or body.

hehhehhehheh
   76. The Clarence Thomas of BBTF (scott) Posted: April 29, 2006 at 07:01 PM (#1995829)
aren't all adult bodies x rated? it's the clothing that make them not so.

what about if everyone was just naked?

except for fat people.
   77. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 29, 2006 at 07:20 PM (#1995851)
What is the policy on posting nude? I know that it will impact Brattain, and maybe some others.


Hey, there's a perfectly practical reason for that; it makes hitting CTRL+ALT+DEL simpler and it also makes it easier to use the space bar.

B            e            s            t            R            e            g            a            a            r            d            s

J            o            h            n

(Sorry 'bout that--wife walked by in a halter and a pair of cutoff denim shorts)
   78. Francoeur Sans Gages (AlouGoodbye) Posted: April 29, 2006 at 08:23 PM (#1995937)
I thought posting nude was compulsory.
   79. The Bones McCoy of THT Posted: April 29, 2006 at 09:01 PM (#1995984)
Kind of gives a whole new meaning to "Plug and Play" devices eh?

Best Regards

John
   80. HCO Posted: April 29, 2006 at 11:20 PM (#1996082)
Fat naked people are an untapped mine of comedy.

Alexander Payne realized this when he made Sideways.

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