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Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Man hit in groin at batting cage awarded $1.2 million

A Miami-Dade jury has awarded almost $1.2 million to a 21-year-old man hit in the groin by a batting-cage pitch.

The jury decided last week that the Sluggers batting cage operation at Tamiami Park in West Miami-Dade negligently failed to properly supervise its employees.

Lhyvann Felipe, who was 19 years old at the time, was hit in the groin by a 60 mph pitch, said his attorney, Gabriel M. Sanchez. He was hospitalized several days later.

The ball struck him after an employee asked him to go back into the batting cage to help pick up the balls.

The machine, which had already completed the cycle and did not have the lights on, spit out the ball, which hit him.

The Batting Cages will rise. We will fall.

Gamingboy Posted: November 12, 2008 at 07:21 PM | 164 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
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   101. Ron Johnson Posted: November 13, 2008 at 08:31 AM (#3008005)
"Sports Science" managed to find somebody to take a tennis ball at 50 MPH (for $50 IIRC). Heart rate up to 144 in anticipation of the hit. Heart rate up to 182 directly after the hit.

68 pounds of force for those interested in reconsidering.

Found a link on youtube to the episode.
   102. Shredder Posted: November 13, 2008 at 08:45 AM (#3008008)
OK, I'll divulge: I have been hit in the testicles too many times, playing baseball, softball, and hockey. You'd think I'd have learned after the first bad hop and put on a cup, but no. Not even after the second or third time it happened.
I'm with you, dude. I see a cup as simply begging for a shot to the balls. It's like hanging a target there. Never wear one. Never wore shin guards in soccer either if I could get away with it. Going unprotected makes me more vigilant.

Funny thing, though, I played a ton of street hockey in L.A., and still play floor hockey now, and I think people that don't wear shin guards or gloves are crazy. That's mostly because a) most of the people we play against are chops that flail away at anything, and are quite likely to hit your shins, and b) because I think it's just easier to stick handle with a good pair of hockey gloves, and I'd prefer to not break a finger.

And I'd probably be in for the 1.2MM, but I'd probably need to be blindfolded, because there's not way I could do it without flinching.

The bitter irony here is that one reason I'd be willing to go for this is that it's not like I'm getting laid all the time as it is. But with 1.2MM in my pocket, I'd be much more likely to use that area for one of its intended purposes.
   103. MikeOberly Posted: November 13, 2008 at 12:47 PM (#3008017)
Ding dong!
   104. IronChef Chris Wok Posted: November 13, 2008 at 01:06 PM (#3008018)
a) most of the people we play against are chops that flail away at anything

The basic principle of hockey: if you can't get the puck, get the guy.

I love this game.
   105. Misirlou was a Buddhist prodigy Posted: June 11, 2009 at 09:31 PM (#3214953)
True, but it's fairly common for plaintiffs' attorneys to inflate the medical bills in hopes of recovering some multiple of the medicals in settlement or at trial. The payments might be 100% legit or maybe mostly for some sort of "massage" treatments. That's not to say that it makes the Shooty Challenge™ worth the risk.


Wait, no one said anything about "massage" treatments. I bet that changes a few minds.
   106. Dock Ellis on Acid Posted: June 11, 2009 at 09:54 PM (#3214976)
I don't even remember this thread.
   107. Joe Bivens, Minor Genius Posted: June 11, 2009 at 10:04 PM (#3214983)
It's the acid, Doc.
   108. phredbird Posted: June 11, 2009 at 11:03 PM (#3215016)
it was one of the few highlights of a bleak november.
   109. Misirlou was a Buddhist prodigy Posted: June 11, 2009 at 11:17 PM (#3215032)
I don't even remember this thread.


Someone linked to it in a current thread.
   110. Latnam's first name is Bob Lemon's middle name Posted: June 12, 2009 at 12:27 AM (#3215138)
I missed this thread at the time, and I'm so sad I did.

Put me down for a yes, by the way. Medical science will save me, I'm sure.
   111. Infinite Joost (Voxter) Posted: June 12, 2009 at 12:38 AM (#3215165)
I remember this thread. I don't remember if I said anything before, but my answer now is no.
   112. 1k5v3L Posted: June 12, 2009 at 12:40 AM (#3215171)
The guy was hospitalized several days after getting his in the nuts?
WTF did he do in the meantime, groan in oblivion by the batting cages?
More likely though, he was just screening ambulance chasers at home...
   113. Dewey, Soupuss Not Doomed to Succeed Posted: June 12, 2009 at 12:43 AM (#3215173)
Medical science will save me, I'm sure.

Yes, but it will cost you $1.2 million.

BWAHAHAHAHA!
   114. flournoy Posted: June 12, 2009 at 12:43 AM (#3215175)
I said no in November, and I stand by that decision now.
   115. Misirlou was a Buddhist prodigy Posted: June 12, 2009 at 12:46 AM (#3215180)
I said no in November, and I stand by that decision now.


Even with the massages?
   116. flournoy Posted: June 12, 2009 at 12:51 AM (#3215202)
First of all, you'd have to tell me who would be performing this massage. Second of all, no, not even with the massage.

Nice handle though, I have done karaoke once in my life, and Amish Paradise was my choice.
   117. RJ in TO Posted: June 12, 2009 at 12:59 AM (#3215227)
Someone linked to it in a current thread.


That would be me. It's one of my favorite threads, so I like to drop in a reference to it periodically.
   118. Latnam's first name is Bob Lemon's middle name Posted: June 12, 2009 at 01:10 AM (#3215271)
114. Dewey, Local Boy and Hero Posted: June 11, 2009 at 08:43 PM (#3215173)
Medical science will save me, I'm sure.

Yes, but it will cost you $1.2 million.

BWAHAHAHAHA!


Like a really bad Episode of the Twilight Zone...
   119. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: June 12, 2009 at 02:10 AM (#3215397)
I just realized that I missed calling it the Batting Cage of DOOM!


Thank God that fad died out.
   120. PreservedFish Posted: June 12, 2009 at 02:35 AM (#3215487)
Did that fad last more than two days? IIRC it was begun when someone said, "I hope this becomes the new fad!" No good fad was ever born that way
   121. Jeff K. Posted: June 12, 2009 at 02:52 AM (#3215552)
Well, if this thread is well and truly resurrected, let me also recount my baseball in the junk story. Little League, 10-11 years old, practice. Couple of friends of mine from school were there (which was rare, as I lived in Arlington but didn't go to AISD schools, LL obeys city limits while Texas school districts are a God unto themselves), bright sunny day. I took my cuts, walking back out to field the newly open position in center, halfway between first and second in shallow right field when all of a sudden I wake up on the ground and my balls HURT.

Turns out the (normally weak-hitting) batter had got hold of one and hit what my coach (our coaching staff was, now that I think of it, a dead-on ringer for Hank Hill, Dale, and the Hispanic guy from Hank's work, looks and all; this would be Hank) termed "a dadgum LASER BEAM right into your family jewels", which I never saw coming. Amusement for my non-sports playing friends, sympathies from the team. For one batter. And then, "Walk it off. Your spot's open." And so I manned my third base.
   122. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn) Posted: June 12, 2009 at 03:15 AM (#3215612)
I'd say yes if ... I'm blindfolded and wearing soundproof headphones (I don't want to know when it's coming), and then I want to have administered to me a fast-acting general anesthesia as soon as I hit the ground. If those conditions aren't met, I'm a no.
   123. Shooty Is Disappointed With His Midstream Urine Posted: July 29, 2009 at 04:01 PM (#3272283)
On further reflection...still no.
   124. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: August 14, 2009 at 02:06 AM (#3292138)
The Joe Son ballbuster link from before has gone stale. There's a (not quite as good) version here.
   125. Gaelan Posted: August 14, 2009 at 02:43 AM (#3292160)
This thread is gold. I was telling my wife about it and she informed me that my answer is yes. I will get hit in the balls for 1.2 million dollars.
   126. RJ in TO Posted: August 14, 2009 at 02:47 AM (#3292163)
Why pay 1.2 million dollars? There are a decent number of people here who would hit you in the balls for free.
   127. RobertMachemer Posted: August 14, 2009 at 03:10 AM (#3292169)
I don't know what these people are earning by participating in this gameshow, but I'd guess it isn't anywhere close to $1,200,000. These men have (figurative -- obviously) balls of brass.
   128. zonk Posted: August 14, 2009 at 04:22 AM (#3292187)
Funny.

Didn't realize it was an old thread as I started reading it -- and was about to post the very same thing I posted initially... then saw I had already posted, thought maybe WTF -- I already went through it, but the pitch misfired and hit me in the temple. Well, that and the fact that I do not have 1.2 million that i know of.\

I still stand by my initial statement. I caught for a season, and took numerous balls off the (cup protected) balls (and not being all that good, they weren't all foul balls). The cup doesn't get nearly the credit as one of mankind's greatest inventions that it deserves. It's certainly not a comfortable feeling, but the wave of relief that washes over you is a drug in and of itself.
   129. Infinite Joost (Voxter) Posted: August 14, 2009 at 01:39 PM (#3292267)
Still no, despite the fact that a female friend of mine has informed me that there are times at which I am in serious danger of being hit in the balls free of charge when we're talking about politics.
   130. Jeff K. Posted: August 14, 2009 at 01:41 PM (#3292271)
Didn't realize it was an old thread as I started reading it

As Homer says, man hit in groin is a timeless classic.
   131. Shooty Is Disappointed With His Midstream Urine Posted: August 14, 2009 at 01:44 PM (#3292272)
As Homer says, man hit in groin is a timeless classic.

But I enjoyed the camp values of Senor Spielbergo's production. It deserves a reappraisal and a Criterion DVD re-release.
   132. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: August 14, 2009 at 02:19 PM (#3292293)
This thread is gold. I was telling my wife about it and she informed me that my answer is yes. I will get hit in the balls for 1.2 million dollars.


And this is why society is decaying.
   133. Shooty Is Disappointed With His Midstream Urine Posted: August 14, 2009 at 02:25 PM (#3292296)
And this is why society is decaying.

Naw, society is decayed and hopeless already. And you're needed in the Denny McLain thread!
   134. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: August 14, 2009 at 02:38 PM (#3292307)
134 posts and these junior high jokes have not been posted:

Question: What's the capital of Thailand?
Answer, delivered with a shot to the groin: "Bangkok"

And this one:

Q: Did you ever want to own any land?
A in the manner above: Here's a couple of achers.
   135. hokieneer Posted: August 14, 2009 at 02:38 PM (#3292308)
Would you take a 60 mph pitch directly in the nads--and I mean directly--for 1.2 million?


Initially I would say yes. Even after attorney fees and taxes, 1.2 million is a lot of cash to come into all at once.

However, I saw a HS teammate of mine take a hard-hit grounder square in the nads and it was the most horrendous thing I've ever seen. We were practicing indoors in a gym and fielding ground balls off the hardwood, so the ball had speed. I imagine that was only 50% as hard as a 60 mph direct shot. I couldn't imagine the pain, i'm going to be a chicken and say No.
   136. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: August 14, 2009 at 03:01 PM (#3292322)
Oh, my answer is no, as is NFW, baby.
   137. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: August 14, 2009 at 03:18 PM (#3292334)
Naw, society is decayed and hopeless already.

If history progresses because of the synergistic interaction of past events and innovations, then as history does progress, the number of these events and innovations increases. This increase in possible connections causes the process of innovation to not only continue, but to accelerate. What happens when this rate of innovation, or more importantly change itself, becomes too much for the average person to handle? What does this mean for individual power, liberty, and privacy?
   138. kthejoker Posted: August 14, 2009 at 03:46 PM (#3292357)
Perhaps we should revise the question:

What's the highest pitch speed for which you'd take a shot to the groin for $1.2 million? 50? 40? 35?

I'm thinking I might do it at 40. That's probably right at the speed where the chances of catastrophic and irreversible injuries start to rise dramatically.

I'd definitely do it at 35.
   139. kthejoker Posted: August 14, 2009 at 03:47 PM (#3292359)
To hokieneer: how long did it take your friend to recover, though? Was he up and walking around within the hour? Did he go to the hospital? $1.2 million is a lot of money for say an hour of intense suffering.
   140. Shooty Is Disappointed With His Midstream Urine Posted: August 14, 2009 at 03:48 PM (#3292360)
This increase in possible connections causes the process of innovation to not only continue, but to accelerate.

I don't think this necessarily follows. Humans innovate, but we're still basically the dumb monkeys we were 4000 years ago. And, hey, we survived the era of the programmable VCR, a device with which the average person was helpless.
   141. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: August 14, 2009 at 03:53 PM (#3292365)
I don't know if any of that is true, Shoot. I was just quoting the Whiskeypedia article on the TV show "Connections." But I do know that the more choices we can make nowadays wrt entertainment options, careers, products et al aren't necessarily liberating.
   142. zonk Posted: August 14, 2009 at 04:01 PM (#3292375)
However, I saw a HS teammate of mine take a hard-hit grounder square in the nads and it was the most horrendous thing I've ever seen. We were practicing indoors in a gym and fielding ground balls off the hardwood, so the ball had speed. I imagine that was only 50% as hard as a 60 mph direct shot. I couldn't imagine the pain, i'm going to be a chicken and say No.


Living in a northern climate - our HS team generally had a solid month of indoor practive before we could get outdoors... Full speed fielding drills, hitting in a cage, etc. It was MISERABLE. No funny hops, sure - but a hard hit grounder or a short hop? Fuhgeddabout.

When we got wind of complaints from indoor sport coaches about scuffs and problems on the gym floor, we started doing everything we could to exacerbate the problem to end the torture.
   143. Who Swished In Your Cornflakes? Posted: August 27, 2009 at 02:49 AM (#3306373)
Wait, no one said anything about "massage" treatments. I bet that changes a few minds.


Not if these massages involve Icy Hot.
   144. Shooty Is Disappointed With His Midstream Urine Posted: October 09, 2009 at 04:17 PM (#3346376)
I guess we'll find out this offseason how much Matt Holliday think putting his nuts at risk is worth.
   145. Best Dressed Chicken in Town Posted: May 21, 2010 at 05:02 PM (#3538960)
This thread makes my balls hurt. How much $ do I get for reading it?
   146. Avoid running at all times.-S. Paige Posted: May 21, 2010 at 05:21 PM (#3538985)
I do this only when I'm very old and my penis is useless, a wrinkly lifeless thing, and I do this for my kids and their kids. It would be nice to pass along some money to them, and if it means bruising my penis to do it, I'm willing to make the sacrifice. So, I'm a yes in 2060.
   147. Styles P. Deadball Posted: May 21, 2010 at 05:39 PM (#3539007)
DO NOT LOOK AT THIS!!


I somehow made it through to the point of "the left testis was apparently missing" before vomiting.

I guess I could be put on the old "no" list

I promise, though, if I were to take one for the team, I wouldn't staple my ####### nutsack back together again.
   148. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:07 PM (#3539027)
The headline in this thread still makes me laugh several months later.
   149. Greg Pope thinks the Cubs are reeking havoc Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:10 PM (#3539032)
This thread makes my balls hurt. How much $ do I get for reading it?

Sorry, the time frame for joining the class action suit is closed.

Honestly, shouldn't there be a time limit past which no more comments can be added?
   150. Best Dressed Chicken in Town Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:18 PM (#3539044)
Why? There used to be, and that was no fun. Sometimes topics become relevant again. Sometimes you want to directly respond to old comments. Now, this one has no relevance whatsoever, but so what? Are you upset because you falsely believed there had been another $1.2M verdict? (I thought Ubaldo Jimenez had thrown another no-hitter when that topic popped back up on the hot list yesterday.)
   151. Misirlou was a Buddhist prodigy Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:20 PM (#3539045)
Honestly, shouldn't there be a time limit past which no more comments can be added?


I fall for it every time. Every time this thread gets resurrected my first thought is "Criminy! It happened again!"
   152. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn) Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:22 PM (#3539047)
Personally, I get a laugh every time this thing pops up on the sidebar. Viva la Testicles Thread!
   153. Jose Is The Most Absurd Thing on the Site Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:26 PM (#3539050)
Whoever suggested reading Der Komminskar's story in post #38 is to be commended. His pain was my pleasure.
   154. PerroX Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:26 PM (#3539051)
More links and stories if youre going to resurrect this thread. I still have the stapled scrotum story linked for my friends and co-workers to enjoy.

Btw, nfw am i taking an intentional shot to the groin. Something's wrong with you if you'd rather have a million dollars over a functioning penis.
   155. RJ in TO Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:28 PM (#3539054)
Whoever suggested reading Der Komminskar's story in post #38 is to be commended.

You're welcome. I link to this thread every chance I get. It is comedy gold.
   156. Der Komminsk-sar Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:32 PM (#3539057)
You know, every time I see this pop up in the sidebar, I think of Ryan.

And, to be clear about this, "everything"'s working just fine, thank you very much.
   157. Dan Szymborski Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:33 PM (#3539059)
I'm willing to make the sacrifice. So, I'm a yes in 2060.

Make sure not to commit to exactly $1.2 million - if inflation hits badly, you don't want to get hit in the balls with a baseball for a carton of eggs or a quart of milk.
   158. Cris E Posted: May 21, 2010 at 06:47 PM (#3539072)
29. Craig Calcaterra Posted: November 12, 2008 at 03:53 PM (#3007699)

Would you take a 60 mph pitch directly in the nads--and I mean directly--for 1.2 million?

I've been married for over 13 years. I have two kids, a mortgage, and no reasonable way to escape the legal profession any time soon. On top of that I'm bald, I live in Ohio, and my parents recently moved to a place less than two miles from my home.

Where do I f*ckin' sign up for the changeup to the crotch thing?


Apparently within the past 18 months Craig found out where to sign up...
   159. SoSH U at work Posted: June 16, 2010 at 07:03 PM (#3561095)
Bump, if only to trick Misirlou and please Dayn.

And yeah, I'm in.
   160. Shooty Is Disappointed With His Midstream Urine Posted: June 16, 2010 at 07:09 PM (#3561103)
All you have to do to find this thread is type "smashed dick" into the site's google thingy.
   161. Jose Is The Most Absurd Thing on the Site Posted: June 16, 2010 at 07:09 PM (#3561104)
I've read through this thread a few times while trying not to burst out laughing and get fired. I'm putting this in the NFW category. There's a number for everything in life but that number for this experience is WELL north of 1.2 million.
   162. Who Swished In Your Cornflakes? Posted: September 08, 2010 at 06:13 PM (#3636162)
Definite 'no.' My first experience with nut-cracking was my first day of kindergarten. I was standing around on the playground, minding my own business before the bell rang, and the soon-to-be biggest female bully in the school comes up behind me, taps me on the shoulder, and kicks me square in the beanbag. I think I did a backflip. Class was hazy that day.
   163. base ball chick Posted: September 08, 2010 at 06:32 PM (#3636192)
of course this here thread keeps "popping up"
why the surprise?
"keeps popping up when you thought it would FINALLY lie down" sure nuff sounds like men to me
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