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1. Eugene FreedmanThe Onion expected a little more.
maybe the Twins
We can't all be the Dragonborn, you know.
Wouldn't it have been easier just to learn how to play the guitar?
After they removed both of the forks already stuck in his eyeballs.
Maybe we need a Most Injured Player award?
he still has a ways to go to break Mike Hampton's record
I assumed the MIP award would have been named after Nick Johnson.
Edit: Holy crap. Nick Johnson is still going (signed to a minor league deal with Baltimore).
Yes.
You see that reliever from Minnesota? He throws a curveball.
Curve. Ball.
B-Ref has career earnings of $4.2M.
He probably should try to stick around to pad his pension, if nothing else.
DL time counts as MLB service.
That sounds like a lot more money than it really is. You have to figure that he ended up with maybe $2.5-3M after taxes, and now he's 27 years old with a family and no source of income, and practically no marketable skills. And medical problems.
Nolan Ryan points at his aching bunion and nods sagely.
Fixed.
Zumaya has already had two elbow surgeries, two shoulder surgeries on his right arm. The only thing that can cure him now is a large diagonal cut from left shoulder.
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