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Wednesday, October 17, 2012

New book collects weird stuff Ichiro Suzuki says

O Holy 牛!: The Selected Verse of Ichiro Suzuki

Which is ostensibly why author David Shields has published a collection of the weird stuff Ichiro has said throughout his lengthy baseball career. The book, “Baseball Is Just Baseball: The Understated Ichiro,” was released Sept. 13 and is available both in analog (you know, as a book) and as an e-book.

Here are some excerpts from the first few pages of the book:

“During a game between the Mariners and A’s in Oakland, fans in the right-field bleachers taunted him with racial epithets and threw quarters and ice at him. A man who hit Ichiro in the head with a quarter stood and took a bow. Afterward, asked what happened, Ichiro said—according to the translator, Ted Heid—“Something came out of the stands and hit me.” Ichiro immediately said something to Heid, who said, “I must correct my previous interpretation. Ichiro said, ‘Something came out of the sky and hit me.’” Asked how much money he collected, Ichiro said, “I couldn’t tell if it was rain or money coming down.” Asked if something like this had ever happened to him in Japan, he said, “Of course it happened there. Any time you come in as a visiting team, things fall out of the sky. The gods once threw an aluminum can at me.”

Repoz Posted: October 17, 2012 at 11:30 PM | 14 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: books, mariners

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   1. Gamingboy Posted: October 17, 2012 at 11:50 PM (#4274997)
I MUST HAVE THIS BOOK.
   2. Joyful Calculus Instructor Posted: October 17, 2012 at 11:55 PM (#4275000)
My first reading of the title was: "New book collects weird stuff," Ichiro Suzuki says.
   3. Los Angeles El Hombre of Anaheim Posted: October 18, 2012 at 01:06 AM (#4275026)
Those All-Star Game pep talks better be in there!
   4. Walt Davis Posted: October 18, 2012 at 06:40 AM (#4275072)
Those excerpts are not funny.
   5. Greg K Posted: October 18, 2012 at 06:59 AM (#4275074)
Those excerpts are not funny.

You want to talk about not funny...this morning I had to try to explain (and failed to do so) this knee-slapper from William the Conqueror to a class for first-years.

From William of Malmsebury's account of the battle of Hastings:

The duke, with serene countenance, declaring aloud that God would favour his as being the righteous side, called for his arms; and when, through the haste of his attendants, he had put on his hauberk the hind part before, he corrected the mistake with a laugh, saying "The power of my dukedom shall be turned into a kingdom."
   6. Rants Mulliniks Posted: October 18, 2012 at 07:46 AM (#4275083)
I have a feeling that knowing what a hauberk was wouldn't make that any more comical......
   7. BochysFingers Posted: October 18, 2012 at 08:09 AM (#4275093)
Why do I sense that this book will be available at the Dollar Tree about a month after release?
   8. shoewizard Posted: October 18, 2012 at 08:14 AM (#4275095)
I remember seeing a book in a bookstore with Ichiro quotes like 9 years ago on a trip to Seattle.

I wonder if this is just an "updated version" or if someone copied the concept.
   9. ecwcat Posted: October 18, 2012 at 08:24 AM (#4275102)
Those excerpts are not funny.


Dick
   10. My name is Votto, and I love to get blotto Posted: October 18, 2012 at 08:46 AM (#4275115)
My first reading of the title was: "New book collects weird stuff," Ichiro Suzuki says.


Kramer's coffee-table book about coffee tables?
   11. vortex of dissipation Posted: October 18, 2012 at 08:58 AM (#4275121)
I remember seeing a book in a bookstore with Ichiro quotes like 9 years ago on a trip to Seattle.

I wonder if this is just an "updated version" or if someone copied the concept.


Shields's book originally came out in 2001. And then there's this one.
   12. ASmitty Posted: October 18, 2012 at 09:41 AM (#4275153)
Ichiro seems to really enjoy having fun at his translator's expense.

I was assigned a translator for work once and really hated it. A colleague, on the other hand, loved having one and seemed to revel in making him say odd (but not horribly offensive) things.

The oft-repeated story about what Ichiro had his translator say to Jason Bay at the ASG comes to mind.
   13. Dock Ellis Posted: October 18, 2012 at 10:04 AM (#4275163)
The oft-repeated story about what Ichiro had his translator say to Jason Bay at the ASG comes to mind.

I had never heard about this before, so I googled it. Man, that's great.
   14. Delino DeShields & Yarnell Posted: October 18, 2012 at 11:36 AM (#4275235)
#5 Is that like an 'ass face' put down of the king? Not bad.

We had a Japanese contingent to our company (in Milwaukee) recently. Decided to sign a baseball as a gift. Got one with the racing sausages* on it. Talk about a weird translation.

* we went on to tell the story of how one-time Brewer Hideo Nomo was so enamored with them that as a visiting player he later came back and sereptitiously ran as one of the sausages. At this point even the translator had given up.

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