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Thursday, April 24, 2008

Ozzie Guillen can’t say enough of Jeter

The Adventures of Ozzie and Hairyass!

White Sox manager Ozzie Guillen had no problem expressing his man-crush on New York Yankees shortstop Derek Jeter.

‘‘Derek Jeter has everything in his life,’’ Guillen gushed Wednesday. ‘‘He’s got money, he’s got rings…’‘

Then Guillen paused and laughed as it became obvious where he was going.

‘‘He’s not married,’’ he continued. ‘‘He lives in New York. At the All-Star Game, I looked around to see if he’s got anything I don’t like. Whoa. The perfect man. Too bad I don’t have a daughter.’‘

Full Nelson to Can’t Stop the Breeding.

Repoz Posted: April 24, 2008 at 09:39 PM | 15 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
Tags: white sox, yankees

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1. The Kids Are Enright (1k5v3L)

Posted: April 24, 2008 at 09:46 PM (#2757967)

Is this even legal?

2. Swoboda is freedom Posted: April 24, 2008 at 09:48 PM (#2757969)

Too bad I don’t have a daughter.’’

Cause I would really like her to have a disease.

3. Dewey, Steven Wright Wannabe and Soupuss Posted: April 24, 2008 at 09:48 PM (#2757971)

Is this even legal?

It is in Massachusetts.

4. Hang down your head, Tom Foley Posted: April 24, 2008 at 09:51 PM (#2757973)

This is just payback for the man-crush Stump Merrill had on Ozzie.

5. hscs Posted: April 24, 2008 at 10:22 PM (#2758003)

And he had bad things to say about A-Rod a few years ago. Wave goodbye to Girardi.

6. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: April 25, 2008 at 01:21 PM (#2758462)

Ozzie was saying the same stuff to Evan Longoria the other day after Longoria signed that huge contract.

7. Repoz

Posted: April 25, 2008 at 01:25 PM (#2758467)

Ozzie was saying the same stuff to Evan Longoria the other day after Longoria signed that huge contract.

Two-timer!

8. Shooty: Applying to be Fearless Leader

Posted: April 25, 2008 at 01:28 PM (#2758470)

‘’He lives in New York. At the All-Star Game, I looked around to see if he’s got anything I don’t like. Whoa. The perfect man.

Fag!

(sorry, had to be done.)

9. The District Attorney Posted: April 25, 2008 at 01:48 PM (#2758483)

Not really.

10. Shooty: Applying to be Fearless Leader

Posted: April 25, 2008 at 01:57 PM (#2758495)

Not really.

Yeah, probably. My judgement isn't what it used to be. I keep waiting for the wisdom that comes from getting older to kick in.

11. Van Lingle Mungo Jerry Posted: April 25, 2008 at 02:18 PM (#2758514)

See, now if you had said something marginally more clever like, "Looks like Ozzie's got a thing for Jeter's fist pump," you might have gotten away with it.

12. Shooty: Applying to be Fearless Leader

Posted: April 25, 2008 at 02:26 PM (#2758521)

See, now if you had said something marginally more clever like, "Looks like Ozzie's got a thing for Jeter's fist pump," you might have gotten away with it.

Yeah, it was a whiff. In hindsight, I should have tried to work in some kind of Mariotti as the pliant midget in a menage a trois from the dreams of Satan himself. I am not on my game today.

13. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: April 25, 2008 at 02:30 PM (#2758528)

Fag!

AFAICT only Jeff Kent qualifies among active major leaguers, unless you count Kris Benson (I don't).

Billy McCool, Winston Llenas, and Gauloise Chesterfield deLuckyStrike qualify, but only as former major leaguers.

14. As foretold by the prophesy (JFSE) Posted: April 25, 2008 at 02:39 PM (#2758537)

We get a topic on Ozzie Guillen and Jeter and all we can turn it into is ethnic Brokeback Mountain?

15. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: April 25, 2008 at 03:38 PM (#2758589)

We get a topic on Ozzie Guillen and Jeter and all we can turn it into is ethnic Brokeback Mountain?

We just can't quit.

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Thursday, April 24, 2008

Ozzie Guillen can’t say enough of Jeter

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