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Thursday, November 15, 2012
Pittsburgh Gazette Times, November 15, 1912:
King Cole, who pitched a few games for the [Cubs and] Pirates last year, has been appointed bench manager for John The Barber, with a possibility that, in a pinch, he will do some shaving and hair cutting himself.
It will be recalled that King took a tonsorial degree in Iowa before he broke into league baseball. He will have absolute authority over the men in the shop, and the customers, too, telling them what tonics to use, whether they shall be combed wet or dry, shaved close or far away, attacked with shears or clippers, singed or shampooed, massaged by hand or machine, and whether or not their shoes need shining.
Asked for a statement regarding his appointment, King replied: “Why all this superfluous tonsorial herpicide? The mater [sic] is—sine qua non. I have nothing else to say.”
Eat your heart out, Mr. Maglie.
If Cole ever did actually manage the barber shop, it was only for a few months. He threw 341.2 innings for the 1913 Columbus Senators.
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