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Friday, February 20, 2009

Royals’ Guillen out after removing ingrown nail himself

He then cleaned it up with one of Rube Goldberg’s Self-Operating Napkins.

The nail was only a slight irritant Monday when Guillen reported to camp but soon worsened from the pounding caused by various workouts.

“The doctor saw me (Wednesday),” Guillen said, “and he said we’ll see how it feels in the morning. If it wasn’t any better, he wanted me to have surgery. I thought, ‘Whoaaa.’

“So I went on my own (Wednesday) to the pharmacy, got some tweezers, came home and pulled it out myself. Let me tell you, I cried. I had one tough hour. But I got it out.”

Guillen said the nail had hooked and twisted deep into the skin.

“I reached in there (with the tweezers),” he said, “and poked around until I got the end of it. Then I counted one, two, three and just pulled …. Oh, my God. It came out, but tears were running down my cheeks.”

Club officials weren’t particularly pleased by the self-surgery but indicated the biggest concern now is avoiding an infection. Guillen is being treated with antibiotics but said his toe is already much better.

Repoz Posted: February 20, 2009 at 12:15 PM | 59 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: royals

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   1. worm Posted: February 20, 2009 at 01:00 PM (#3081812)
Yowzers.

Tip for anyone else too cheap for health care: Soak your foot in warm water for a while before attempting anything. And don't put it off - take care of it ASAP.
   2. 33Boots Posted: February 20, 2009 at 01:34 PM (#3081817)
Right after I finished college, before I had any money to go to the doctor, I had an ingrown toenail and I would not describe it as anything other than impossibly painful. When I was in high school, I got t-boned by a drunk and nearly died, open skull fracture, broken and displaced jaw, spiral fracture of the humerus, internal injuries etc (wear your seatbelt kiddies)...and that pain was as nothing compared to this stupid little toenail. Ungodly pain. Ended up doing the same thing Guillen did. As dumb as it may sound, for me it got to the point where I couldn't take it even one more minute and I got pliers and just yanked that mofo right out (that sucked beyond comprehension, but after a couple hours I was so glad I did it). I'm usually happy to call Jose Guillen an idiot, but I'm giving him a pass on this one.
   3. Fly should without a doubt be number !!!!! Posted: February 20, 2009 at 02:56 PM (#3081857)
But, didn't he just avoid the same exact surgery, only this time he didn't have sterile equipment or Novocaine? What did he think was going to happen with this surgery? Amputation?
   4. CraigK Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:02 PM (#3081862)
Uh, I had an ingrown toenail not too long ago, and even my shitty insurance paid for all but like twenty bucks of it. I'm assuming that the MLB insurance is good enough for you to just walk into a general practitioner and let them take care of it.
   5. Belfry Bob Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:03 PM (#3081865)
He should have gotten his cousin to do it.
   6. Zach Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:04 PM (#3081866)
The doctor should have explained what he meant by "surgery" better, if the mere mention of the word prompted Guillen to take things into his own pair of pliers.
   7. zonk Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:10 PM (#3081873)
What did he think was going to happen with this surgery? Amputation?


I suspect player hears "surgery" and thinks he'll be down for weeks - I'd be willing to bet that Guillen figured he'd save himself downtime if he just took care of it himself.
   8. RB in NYC (Now Semi-Retired from BBTF) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:16 PM (#3081880)
I suspect player hears "surgery" and thinks he'll be down for weeks - I'd be willing to bet that Guillen figured he'd save himself downtime if he just took care of it himself.
That's pretty stupid, and while maybe the trainer could have done a better job of explaining, Jose Guillen has been around a while, he really ought to know better.

Having also suffered from ingrown toenails, they hurt like all hell. I mean, really ####### painful. Also, ingrown toenails must be among the nastiest looking of relatively common ailments.
   9. zonk Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:20 PM (#3081884)
That's pretty stupid, and while maybe the trainer could have done a better job of explaining, Jose Guillen has been around a while, he really ought to know better.


I don't know... I hate to generalize, but many athletes aren't the sharpest tools in the box to begin with -- add in a bit of ESL, and I can totally see why he did it.

...all that said, I'm certainly in no particular rush to stop anyone from ripping on Guillen - I mean, it's the middle of February... what else are we going to do?
   10. Tricky Dick Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:30 PM (#3081890)
Why not? He spent the night at a Holiday Inn.
   11. Tulo's Fishy Mullet (mrams) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:32 PM (#3081892)
I've had this 'surgery' performed, it's a 15 minute job. Your average family doctor probably does one of these a week. They give you a local anesthetic, you look away, and the Doc goes to work.

The pain (leading up to the procedure) is really bad, as noted. My old family Doc said nearly all ingrown toenails are caused by improper nail trimming by the person themselves.
   12. PASTE Thinks This Trout Kid Might Be OK (Zeth) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:38 PM (#3081900)
SURPRISE, Ariz. -- Not to be outdone, Royals first baseman Ross Gload is expected to miss six to eight weeks after unsuccessfully attempting to remove his own appendix.

"My gut was just really killing me, and I didn't want to wait for an appointment with a specialist," Gload said in a phone interview Friday morning, "And I heard about what Jose had done, and I thought, hey, I could do that. It can't be that hard to find, right?"

Contacted Friday morning, Royals general manager Dayton Moore commented, "While we appreciate Ross and Jose's aggressive approach to surgery, we want to urge all our players to consider their options before proceeding."

"I've been saying for years the whole Royals organization doesn't place nearly enough emphasis on patience," said Royals fan Rany Jazayerli. "This is just another typical example."
   13. Mike Green Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:42 PM (#3081907)
While Gload is expected to make a full recovery, his butter knife won't be seeing bread again.
   14. MajorTom Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:44 PM (#3081910)
I've had this 'surgery' performed, it's a 15 minute job. Your average family doctor probably does one of these a week. They give you a local anesthetic, you look away, and the Doc goes to work.

I lived with 'em on both big toes for 10 years, because I'm an idiot. Used to just go in, dig as much of the nail out as I could, and have them grow back in. The pain was unimaginable.

Went to a foot doctor, he looked for five minutes, and he said, "let's laser 'em". Gave me a local, told me to look away, yanked 'em out and cauterized both toes. All told it was probably 15 minutes, with the most pain being the local administered. I'm thinking the trainer or Guillen's doctor could have explained all of this, and that he could sit for a couple of days and then all would be well.
   15. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:51 PM (#3081915)
He heard "surgery" and figured they were going to scope his toenail. Or something equally stupid. Don't blame the doctor for that.
   16. CraigK Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:52 PM (#3081916)
Primey fir 12.
   17. aleskel Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:54 PM (#3081925)
this is nothing. David Eckstein once got caught in a wolf trap and chewed his leg off to make it back to Anaheim in time for the game. He went 2-for-4 with a stolen base that night.
   18. RB in NYC (Now Semi-Retired from BBTF) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:59 PM (#3081933)
if Aron Ralston can cut off his own arm, I can certainly cut off a small piece of toenail and drain some pus.
Why tip someone for a job I'm capable of doing myself? I can deliver food. I can drive a taxi. I can, and do, cut my own hair. I did however, tip my urologist, because I am unable to pulverize my own kidney stones.
   19. Cris E Posted: February 20, 2009 at 03:59 PM (#3081934)
12 was OK, but I liked 5 better.

When I was 14 our catcher had ingrown toenails. About every other game he'd get a pitch or a foul tip off the foot and after the game his socks near the offended toe would be all bloody. Looked like it sucked.
   20. aleskel Posted: February 20, 2009 at 04:04 PM (#3081941)
I did however, tip my urologist

better that than him tipping you!
   21. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 04:11 PM (#3081949)
"As dumb as it may sound, for me it got to the point where I couldn't take it even one more minute and I got pliers and just yanked that mofo right out (that sucked beyond comprehension, but after a couple hours I was so glad I did it)."

I know someone who did the same thing, only with a tooth.
   22. Marty Winn Posted: February 20, 2009 at 04:36 PM (#3081983)
Probably 7 or 8 times in my life I have had to perform ingrown toe nail surgery on myself. I agree I think that trimming the nail to far causes the problem. What I do is first steralize everything with alcohol and maybe open fire, but in the other order (you don't want MRSA/infection) then cut straight down from the top/loose/white part of the nail along the edge of the exposed nail into the part the skin is hanging onto from underneath as far down to the base of the nail as I can stand. This is done with small stiff scissors (1/2" blades) that come with some nail clipper sets. That part is painful but not the worst part. Then with some kind of tweezer/plyer pull out that thin (maybe 1/4" wide sliver of nail that has been causing you so much pain. Because it is still being held onto on the back side by the skin it hurts like crazy. But then it's over. If you did it right everything grows out right and it heals up. Don't be an idiot and clip the edges of your big toes close.
   23. snapper (history's 42nd greatest monster) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 04:44 PM (#3081995)
You know, if you just cut a small triangle in the the nail (about 1/4 in. off center on the side with the problem) when you notice the problem starting, the nail will usually correct itself.
   24. LargeBill Posted: February 20, 2009 at 04:48 PM (#3081999)
Hey, I'll be back later guys. I've got to run up WalMart and get the Do-It-Yourself Root Canal kit. Stink'n dentist wants a thousand bucks to do one on my kid. The kit is only $57.98!!!
   25. The Good Face Posted: February 20, 2009 at 04:49 PM (#3082000)
ITT: Way, WAY TMI.
   26. Swedish Chef Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:15 PM (#3082031)
Newsflash: Mike Hampton out for season after removing appendix himself.
   27. RJ in TO Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:19 PM (#3082040)
Newsflash: Mike Hampton out for season after removing appendix himself.


Intentionally, or accidentally?
   28. Nasty Nate Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:21 PM (#3082043)
Newsflash: Mike Hampton out for season after removing appendix himself.


15 posts too late and a dollar short
   29. Swedish Chef Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:27 PM (#3082051)
15 posts too late and a dollar short

Don't tell me I have to read the ENTIRE thread to post. What's next, that I actually might have to read the whole intro or, god forbid, go read the article?
   30. Joe Bivens, Minor Genius Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:30 PM (#3082057)
Guillen should have the rest of his toenails taken away from him.
   31. rfloh Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:31 PM (#3082058)
15. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 09:51 AM (#3081915)
He heard "surgery" and figured they were going to scope his toenail. Or something equally stupid. Don't blame the doctor for that.


It is the doctor's fault for not clarifying what he meant by "surgery".
   32. PASTE Thinks This Trout Kid Might Be OK (Zeth) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:33 PM (#3082060)
I'm asking because I honestly don't know: How good is Jose's English? The doctor's? Could that have anything to do with Jose thinking he was facing serious surgery?
   33. Randy Jones Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:37 PM (#3082064)
Isn't Guillen the guy who had his girlfriend cash his $17000+ paycheck at some check cashing place in DC? Seems like he might not be the most intelligent person or at least he is incredibly ignorant.
   34. Joe Bivens, Minor Genius Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:38 PM (#3082066)
Some people will go to great lengths to avoid seeing a dentist or doctor. Maybe Guillen had a bad experience, and is scared of them.
   35. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:42 PM (#3082068)
It is the doctor's fault for not clarifying what he meant by "surgery".

Come, now. This was just so outright dumb in so many different ways...it was a perfect storm of dumb going on in Guillen's head. How much exactly is a doctor required to explain to an adult with a (presumably) working brain what fixing an ingrown toenail involves? And if a doctor said you needed surgery, would you immediately think that meant it was something better done by yourself? And even if you had your doubts, isn't it fairly obvious that, rather than go off half-cocked, you could ask the doctor exactly what he was proposing to do?
   36. RB in NYC (Now Semi-Retired from BBTF) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:42 PM (#3082070)
I'm asking because I honestly don't know: How good is Jose's English? The doctor's? Could that have anything to do with Jose thinking he was facing serious surgery?
He's been in professional baseball for 15 years, and had UCL surgery a couple of years ago, so this isn't his first rodeo or anything.

The part of his story I don't understand is how Guillen could think that the doctor was going to perform some complicated thing that would keep him out for months, whereas his home surgery would be just as good but cause him to miss less time. That's a striking level of ignorance.
   37. bunyon Posted: February 20, 2009 at 05:45 PM (#3082072)
Police believe alcohol was involved.
   38. Los Angeles El Hombre of Anaheim Posted: February 20, 2009 at 06:16 PM (#3082086)
Guillen should have his kids' toenails taken away.
   39. Crispix reaches boiling point with lackluster play Posted: February 20, 2009 at 06:46 PM (#3082102)
Jose Guillen should sue himself for malpractice and go to jail.
   40. Slinger Francisco Barrios (Dr. Memory) Posted: February 20, 2009 at 06:59 PM (#3082118)
Jose Guillen should sue himself for malpractice and go to jail.

He wouldn't go to jail...he's rich and could easily afford to settle with himself.
   41. Willie Mayspedes Posted: February 20, 2009 at 07:06 PM (#3082121)
One time my foot got infected in the tropics and swelled up like a brick. All of this because I didn't clean a rug burn that I got on the stage at a club called "The Bounty Ship". Worst pain of my life was that Indonesian nurse dude rubbing the 1/4 inch deep sore with an alcohol gauze pad. At one point there was a re-occuring white head on one of my toes that would fill up after I'd pop it, not fun.
   42. Der Komminsk-sar Posted: February 20, 2009 at 07:09 PM (#3082123)
It's Jose Guillen. Of course he did this...
   43. Styles P. Deadball Posted: February 20, 2009 at 07:31 PM (#3082144)
I feel like Sheriff Brody on the boat in Jaws during this whole thing. Just drink to your damn toes, sing some old home-surgery ditty, and let's move on to the next thread.
   44. galaxieboi Posted: February 20, 2009 at 08:32 PM (#3082216)
This whole thread gets a primey. Well played, gentlemen. I'm laughing my ass off at work.
   45. Crispix reaches boiling point with lackluster play Posted: February 20, 2009 at 08:33 PM (#3082218)
And if a doctor said you needed surgery, would you immediately think that meant it was something better done by yourself? And even if you had your doubts, isn't it fairly obvious that, rather than go off half-cocked, you could ask the doctor exactly what he was proposing to do?


I agree, I would choose whatever procedure is least likely to leave me half-cocked.
   46. The Yankee Clapper Posted: February 20, 2009 at 08:36 PM (#3082223)
Some folks are just into extreme self-help. Cal Ripken, Sr., was famous for using a power drill to relieve an accumulation of blood under his toenail.
   47. RJ in TO Posted: February 20, 2009 at 08:36 PM (#3082225)
I agree, I would choose whatever procedure is least likely to leave me half-cocked.


So you're saying that you're not a fan of steroids?
   48. aleskel Posted: February 20, 2009 at 08:46 PM (#3082237)
Cal Ripken, Sr., was famous for using a power drill to relieve an accumulation of blood under his toenail.

I saw them do that to a deckhand on Deadliest Catch; nasty, nasty thing to watch.
   49. Babe Adams Posted: February 20, 2009 at 10:00 PM (#3082333)
If anyone from MLB Network is monitoring, I would much rather see this than the 2006 Home Run Derby.
   50. phredbird Posted: February 20, 2009 at 10:24 PM (#3082366)
i've lost toenails from overtraining when i started upping my miles per week. that really hurts. the nails were coming loose after long runs (12, 14 miles) and/or i'd get blood blisters under the nail. i went online to see what my options were and basically you just have to lance and drain the blisters, put some anitbiotic ointment on the toe and wait for the new nail to push the old nail out. i helped a couple of them along by pulling them out when they were really loose. that hurt too.
good news is as your miles totals go up, you get stronger and your stride is a little better, so most of the nail problems go away. also i got better shoes.
   51. Joe Bivens, Minor Genius Posted: February 20, 2009 at 10:36 PM (#3082390)
Phred, that's quite...disgusting. Between the vaselined nipples and the toenail-less toes, runners are a bizarre breed.

I guess those inconveniences are better than what bicyclists endure, with the numbing of their pee-pee if they sit the wrong way for too long.
   52. phredbird Posted: February 20, 2009 at 11:30 PM (#3082440)
ya, i sweat a lot so i don't need the vaseline that bad, but one weekend for my long run it was cool and very dry and i ended up with abrasions on both of my nipples. heh.

i'll never do the biking stuff. i've heard too many stories about what happens to your equipment from sitting in the seats too long. i read somewhere that the competitive cyclists have a high percentage of ED problems as a group.
   53. Willie Mayspedes Posted: February 21, 2009 at 12:15 AM (#3082456)
I gaurantee that non-vaselined nipples and running are less painful than surfing without a wetsuit. I get it worst on my inner thighs where the legs rub on the board while sitting out there. I've also gotten minor cases of tip rash (from the boardshorts) which is a real zinger. I've also had bloody kneecaps and red rashes on my stomach.
   54. phredbird Posted: February 21, 2009 at 12:36 AM (#3082463)
kaline, are you in cali?
   55. Willie Mayspedes Posted: February 21, 2009 at 12:43 AM (#3082466)
ya I live in Ventura now but grew up in Santa Cruz
   56. Joe Bivens, Minor Genius Posted: February 21, 2009 at 01:00 AM (#3082474)
i'll never do the biking stuff...

Your penis falls asleep is the best why I can describe what happens. Pins and needles. It "turtles". Scary.
   57. PerroX Posted: February 21, 2009 at 01:03 AM (#3082475)
I've also gotten minor cases of tip rash...

Gotten that more than a few times. Fortunately, the penis heals real quickly. Rash on your inner thighs is worse.

No problem with wax in your chest hair?
   58. Willie Mayspedes Posted: February 21, 2009 at 01:14 AM (#3082482)
Nope I have a left nipple thats always hard though and that can get rubbed the wrong way sometimes haha.

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