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Tuesday, August 21, 2018

Scouts are baseball’s poets, and here are some of the best lines they’ve used over the years

The perfect scout’s line is memorable and incisive. It tells you about the player (or an element of their game) without resorting to cliche or tepidness in a way that sticks like a well-cooked noodle. For instance, one gaffe-prone outfielder was said to “run the bases like he thinks he’s invisible.” A different, less-imposing player was described as being able to “hang-glide on a Dorito.” As with great poems, sometimes the omitted words in a scouting report are the ones that matter the most. Consider the time a scout noted about a player’s makeup that they “owned a large collection of tie-dye t-shirts.” The scout’s implication remains unknown.

Jim Furtado Posted: August 21, 2018 at 05:24 PM | 8 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: scouts

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   1. stevegamer Posted: August 21, 2018 at 10:34 PM (#5731324)
Really good read. I loved the photo with the four color pen in the hand wielding the radar gun.
   2. Jose is an Absurd Force of Nature Posted: August 21, 2018 at 10:56 PM (#5731345)
When I go to spring training I usually go to games by myself which often gets me a prime seat right behind the plate with plenty of scouts. It’s awesome. They are usually incredibly chatty and they have great stories.
   3. winnipegwhip Posted: August 21, 2018 at 11:11 PM (#5731355)
Sure scouts may have great stories but the guys are who replacing them can recite all the words to every Monty Python routine".
   4. Rennie's Tenet Posted: August 21, 2018 at 11:16 PM (#5731359)
"Built like Tarzan. Runs like Jane."
   5. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: August 22, 2018 at 12:56 PM (#5731685)
"Can't act. Can't sing. Balding. Can dance a little."
   6. Jose Canusee Posted: August 24, 2018 at 05:03 PM (#5733288)
didn't see if the guy who ran funny was Ron Cey. anyone know?
When scouts go long, they make it count. "In over 40 years of scouting in both sports I have never seen a physical [specimen] like this kid," began a report about a Double-A player. "Bow legged------that's fine. Splay footed-----it's been done-----but an infielder????? Heel to toe runner------I've seen them helped some----not much. Combine all three and you've got a physical freak. But this freak has the tools to be a solid ML hitter for a long time." The freak lived up to the report, by the way, making multiple All-Star Games due to his offensive aptitude.
   7. Stormy JE Posted: August 24, 2018 at 05:13 PM (#5733297)
But are they lyrical gangstas?
   8. dirk Posted: August 24, 2018 at 09:21 PM (#5733416)
i thought they were talking about youk

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