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Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Spotted at Comerica: Longest men’s-room line in recorded history

Playoff baseball…filling bladders faster.

Because you’ve come to rely on me for this very kind of “from the front lines” journalism, I present to you the longest men’s-room line in recorded history ...

Jim Furtado Posted: October 17, 2012 at 06:43 AM | 61 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
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   1. John Northey Posted: October 17, 2012 at 10:02 AM (#4273811)
And women all over the world rejoice.
   2. Fernigal McGunnigle has become a merry hat Posted: October 17, 2012 at 10:23 AM (#4273831)
The Vatican Museum used to have signs telling you how many kilometers long the line was from a certain point. A guard told me that if the line goes over 2.5 km then it probably isn't worth waiting.
   3. Jolly Old St. Nick Is A Jolly Old St. Crip Posted: October 17, 2012 at 10:34 AM (#4273852)
One of these days somebody holding too many beers inside is just going to say "#### it" and pull a Seinfeld.
   4. just plain joe Posted: October 17, 2012 at 10:44 AM (#4273867)
One of these days somebody holding too many beers inside is just going to say "#### it" and pull a Seinfeld.


One of these days? I remember seeing drunks piss on the men's room floor at old Sportsman's Park when I was 10 years old. That was one place for sure that you didn't want to wear sandals.
   5. Tulo's Fishy Mullet (mrams) Posted: October 17, 2012 at 10:47 AM (#4273872)
One of these days somebody holding too many beers inside is just going to say "#### it" and pull a Seinfeld


I don't think I've been to an Opening Day in Milwaukee (or a night at Summerfest) where I didn't see a man whizzing into either a garbage can or a sink. Or, a woman coming into the men's room because the lines were shorter.
   6. base ball chick Posted: October 17, 2012 at 11:49 AM (#4273951)
here and i thought there were all these giant piss pit trough thingys in mens rooms. what, are all the guys refusing to stand next to another guy at a urinal because what if someone looks at his youknowwhat?

interesting that the mens room line is longer than the females room line. i thought men had much larger bladders until they get prostate

i have seen lines for the mens room at the Box, especially BITGOD when we used to have an actual baseball team and the place was full, but the lines were NEVER near that long and they moved fast.

i know that women bring their sons into the ladies room - often until the kid is 8 or 9, but what do single dads with a daughter do when daddy has to go? you can't take your daughter into a mens room unless she is too young to walk
   7. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) Posted: October 17, 2012 at 12:03 PM (#4273974)
Moises Alou wants to know what all these guys are waiting for.
   8. Flynn Posted: October 17, 2012 at 12:24 PM (#4274012)
This is why you have troughs.
   9. dlf Posted: October 17, 2012 at 12:33 PM (#4274030)
i know that women bring their sons into the ladies room - often until the kid is 8 or 9, but what do single dads with a daughter do when daddy has to go? you can't take your daughter into a mens room unless she is too young to walk


I took my daughters into the mens room until they were in kindergarden. After that, I'd send them to the ladies room while standing outside obsessively watching the doors hoping no one thought I was a really warped pervert.
   10. Never Give an Inge (Dave) Posted: October 17, 2012 at 12:34 PM (#4274033)

interesting that the mens room line is longer than the females room line. i thought men had much larger bladders until they get prostate

The line may be longer as I'm sure there are a lot more men in the stadium than women. But I bet the men's room line still moves faster.
   11. Jolly Old St. Nick Is A Jolly Old St. Crip Posted: October 17, 2012 at 12:42 PM (#4274042)
One of these days somebody holding too many beers inside is just going to say "#### it" and pull a Seinfeld.

One of these days? I remember seeing drunks piss on the men's room floor at old Sportsman's Park when I was 10 years old. That was one place for sure that you didn't want to wear sandals.


Griffith Stadium had only three men's rooms on the lower level, two of which weren't much bigger than one of Mitt Romney's guest bathrooms. On a cold December day during a Redskins' sellout, the main loo's combination of cigar smoke, cigar butts, half-empty popcorn containers, misdirected streams of piss, and steam heat from the radiators made for a smell that only a great novelist could possibly describe. And yes, there were plenty of guys pissing in the sink, too. I don't remember whether or not the lines there were quite as long as that picture above in Comerica, but I do know that you had to rush to it from your seat to be able to make it back in time for the second half kickoff.
   12. Tulo's Fishy Mullet (mrams) Posted: October 17, 2012 at 12:44 PM (#4274047)
depends on venue. I take my almost 4 yr old to men's rooms if the place is small. We were recently at a pub and grill place with a separate dining area and I took her to her first real 'men's room.' She was disgusted.
We try to have Mommy do it at larger venues/stadiums, etc, though most new parks have 'family bathrooms' which makes this easier.
   13. DanG Posted: October 17, 2012 at 01:06 PM (#4274098)
I work at the CoPa and while walking past that long line last night a guy came up to us, pulled up his pant leg, and showed us an ugly scar from a long ago accident. He wanted to be put at the front of the line due to this. We suggested he find the line of port-a-potties they brought in for the postseason, which had much shorter lines.
   14. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: October 17, 2012 at 01:06 PM (#4274099)
what, are all the guys refusing to stand next to another guy at a urinal because what if someone looks at his youknowwhat?


You also don't want to see someone else's youknowwhat, because it might accidentally turn you gay.

These rules are for your own protection!
   15. morineko Posted: October 17, 2012 at 01:11 PM (#4274109)
It was raining last night, which makes me wonder if one of the other bathrooms was closed due to flooding (I had a very enlightening conversation with a janitor at Comerica Park in '09 about the bathrooms having flooding issues on nights with heavy rains--this was the day after a rain-delayed (and then made official after midnight) night game.)
   16. depletion Posted: October 17, 2012 at 01:34 PM (#4274164)
i know that women bring their sons into the ladies room - often until the kid is 8 or 9, but what do single dads with a daughter do when daddy has to go? you can't take your daughter into a mens room unless she is too young to walk

HAve them wait by the security guard desk in the museum, which is usually near a rest room. Or, carry them and have them close their eyes, use a stall. Necessity is the mother.
   17. BDC Posted: October 17, 2012 at 01:50 PM (#4274199)
The Vatican Museum used to have signs telling you how many kilometers long the line was from a certain point. A guard told me that if the line goes over 2.5 km then it probably isn't worth waiting

So what do you do then, just take a whiz against the wall of the Castel Sant'Angelo?
   18. Answer Guy Posted: October 17, 2012 at 01:56 PM (#4274210)
here and i thought there were all these giant piss pit trough thingys in mens rooms. what, are all the guys refusing to stand next to another guy at a urinal because what if someone looks at his youknowwhat?


Wrigley Field and Dodger Stadium have them, or at least used to.


   19. Tippecanoe Posted: October 17, 2012 at 01:57 PM (#4274214)
Once I chose the middle of three very long lines in a crowded men's room. When I finally got to the front I found that, while there was a urinal on both my right and left, in front of me was just a very wet spot on the wall.
   20. Answer Guy Posted: October 17, 2012 at 02:08 PM (#4274225)
You also don't want to see someone else's youknowwhat, because it might accidentally turn you gay.


Yeah, perhaps I shoulda been more careful about that in public restrooms and locker rooms. *shrug*
   21. Jose Can Still Seabiscuit Posted: October 17, 2012 at 03:13 PM (#4274317)
Once I chose the middle of three very long lines in a crowded men's room. When I finally got to the front I found that, while there was a urinal on both my right and left, in front of me was just a very wet spot on the wall.


Being a guy is just fantastic. It really is.
   22. Kurt Posted: October 17, 2012 at 03:18 PM (#4274331)
That line looks like a typical NHL concourse between periods.

One of these days somebody holding too many beers inside is just going to say "#### it" and pull a Seinfeld.

I'm drawing a blank on this. George peeing in the gym shower?
   23. stanmvp48 Posted: October 17, 2012 at 03:20 PM (#4274339)
Didn't they get caught whizzing in a parking garage? I see guys bringing their draft beer into the john and resting it on the urinal when they piss. That grosses me out and I am not easily grossed out. What do you guys think?
   24. McCoy Posted: October 17, 2012 at 03:23 PM (#4274343)
On top of the urinal is fine but if it is on the back of a toilet in a stall no way.
   25. Jose Can Still Seabiscuit Posted: October 17, 2012 at 03:30 PM (#4274355)
Didn't they get caught whizzing in a parking garage? I see guys bringing their draft beer into the john and resting it on the urinal when they piss. That grosses me out and I am not easily grossed out. What do you guys think?


I'm with you. Chase the beer and go take your leak. An open beverage container in those men's rooms...no ####### way.

A few years ago the city of Boston had a water main break and tap water was not drinkable. I went to Fenway and all the men's rooms had signs saying not to drink out of the faucets or the toilets. Never has there been a less necessary instruction anywhere.
   26. Dangerous Dean Posted: October 17, 2012 at 03:36 PM (#4274359)
When my daughter is with me I usually just wait outside the family restroom while she does her business. When I do mine she either waits with a security guard or stands in the corner looking away from me.
   27. JoeHova Posted: October 17, 2012 at 03:48 PM (#4274379)

I don't think I've been to an Opening Day in Milwaukee (or a night at Summerfest) where I didn't see a man whizzing into either a garbage can or a sink. Or, a woman coming into the men's room because the lines were shorter.

Haha, definitely. I remember once at Summerfest, I was in the (disgusting) bathroom when three women came in and saw that the men's room was fairly crowded. Rather than wait for a stall or go back out to the women's line, they squatted in a corner (over a pile of cups and paper towels and other trash) and proceeded to piss. Nobody else in the bathroom appeared to think this was unusual.
   28. jack the seal clubber (on the sidelines of life) Posted: October 17, 2012 at 04:01 PM (#4274400)
You also don't want to see someone else's youknowwhat, because it might accidentally turn you gay


Not that there's anything wrong with that.
   29. Shredder Posted: October 17, 2012 at 04:01 PM (#4274404)
That line looks like a typical NHL concourse between periods.
Yeah, that line is nothing compared to the...well...I can't really call it a line. More like the mass of humanity slowly funneling into the men's room at Wrigley at half-time of the Illinois vs. Northwestern football game played there a couple years ago. Left at the tail end of the first half. Got back to my seat about five minutes into the third quarter. The restrooms at Wrigley were not designed for a sport with a half-time.
   30. SteveM. Posted: October 17, 2012 at 04:22 PM (#4274436)
Longest lines I have seen is at Nyeland Stadium at Tennessee. Over 100,000 people trying to pee at halftime. Of course lately with the way UT has played, you just have to wait until the 3rd quarter when the orange faithful have fled from their latest debacle.
   31. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: October 17, 2012 at 04:45 PM (#4274491)
Didn't they get caught whizzing in a parking garage? I see guys bringing their draft beer into the john and resting it on the urinal when they piss. That grosses me out and I am not easily grossed out. What do you guys think?


Why do you need to set it down at all? Don't you have two hands?
   32. zack Posted: October 17, 2012 at 04:48 PM (#4274498)
That line looks like a typical NHL concourse between periods.


Seriously. I've been to preseason games at the Verizon Center that had longer lines than that. 20 minutes is not enough.
   33. Voros McCracken of Pinkus Posted: October 17, 2012 at 04:57 PM (#4274520)
here and i thought there were all these giant piss pit trough thingys in mens rooms.

They have mostly gone the way of the dinosaur. The one at Old Comiskey park should have been sent to Cooperstown. It was a magnificent relic of a bygone age.
   34. BDC Posted: October 17, 2012 at 05:01 PM (#4274527)
Why do you need to set it down at all?

Exactly. I've seen guys at urinals draining beer straight through. And if it's Miller Lite, you wonder why they don't eliminate the middleman.
   35. Fernigal McGunnigle has become a merry hat Posted: October 17, 2012 at 05:01 PM (#4274530)
I used to frequent a bar that had a trough with little plastic boats in it. That made for a lot of entertainment.
   36. cardsfanboy Posted: October 17, 2012 at 05:01 PM (#4274531)
here and i thought there were all these giant piss pit trough thingys in mens rooms. what, are all the guys refusing to stand next to another guy at a urinal because what if someone looks at his youknowwhat?


Military teaches that out of you. In bootcamp you have 80 guys using 5 urinals and less than 5 minutes.... the first time you use the urinals in bootcamp, everyone is waiting patiently for the next guy and only about 1/3rd get to go before being rushed back outside...after that, it's three per urinal. It's a biological function, you learn to get over it.
   37. boteman is here Posted: October 17, 2012 at 05:45 PM (#4274646)
If I'm elected President, all the seats at all the ballparks will be equipped with built-in urinals. Never have to leave your seat!
   38. phredbird Posted: October 17, 2012 at 05:53 PM (#4274657)
Didn't they get caught whizzing in a parking garage? I see guys bringing their draft beer into the john and resting it on the urinal when they piss. That grosses me out and I am not easily grossed out. What do you guys think?


no way. if that makes me a metrosexual, so be it.
   39. phredbird Posted: October 17, 2012 at 05:58 PM (#4274668)
Wrigley Field and Dodger Stadium have them, or at least used to.


dodger stadium now has waterfree urinals, no troughs. at least not in the lower levels.
   40. the Hugh Jorgan returns Posted: October 17, 2012 at 08:13 PM (#4274848)
I see guys bringing their draft beer into the john and resting it on the urinal when they piss. That grosses me out and I am not easily grossed out. What do you guys think?

I agree, it is totally nasty. Food/beverages and toilets should never, ever, ever, ever be in the same room together. Just disgusting....
   41. Justin T., Director of Somethin Posted: October 17, 2012 at 08:14 PM (#4274849)
In the early days of AT&T Park I was in a line like this once when I had a lot of beers needing release. It got to where there was just no way I was gonna make it so I left the line in search of some dark corner. I ended up kinda underneath the bleachers where there was a bathroom that almost nobody was using. Wall-to-wall open urinals. Still one of the happiest moments of my life.

I might have the bathroom's location wrong, although I don't think so. But the main thrust of the story is all correct. A mirage in the desert, only real.
   42. Tulo's Fishy Mullet (mrams) Posted: October 17, 2012 at 08:40 PM (#4274864)
longest lines I have seen is at Neyland Stadium at Tennessee. Over 100,000 people trying to pee at halftime.


I think I might second that. If nothing else I had never seen lines like that before in all the stadia I've visited. Bryant-Denny (Tuscaloosa) was pretty bad too.

Indy 500 men's rooms in the turns are about as bad as any in America. All troughs, I doubt a nickel has gone into them since they were installed.
   43. Jolly Old St. Nick Is A Jolly Old St. Crip Posted: October 17, 2012 at 08:52 PM (#4274875)
In the early days of AT&T Park I was in a line like this once when I had a lot of beers needing release. It got to where there was just no way I was gonna make it so I left the line in search of some dark corner. I ended up kinda underneath the bleachers where there was a bathroom that almost nobody was using. Wall-to-wall open urinals. Still one of the happiest moments of my life.

Sounds a bit like that single block of unregulated street parking within a 15 minute walk of Nationals Park.

And no, I ain't telling, and neither should you.
   44. Fred Lynn Nolan Ryan Sweeney Agonistes Posted: October 17, 2012 at 08:55 PM (#4274880)
I agree, it is totally nasty. Food/beverages and toilets should never, ever, ever, ever be in the same room together. Just disgusting....

I'll use this as an excuse to throw in a shout-out for the films of Luis Buñuel in general, and The Phantom of Liberty in particular.
   45. Howie Menckel Posted: October 17, 2012 at 09:07 PM (#4274892)

One of my favorite memories of my first game at Wrigley in 1986 was the sight of those wiiiiide troughs. I went to Fenway that year, too, and could swear they had 'em as well.
   46. The Ghost's Tryin' to Reason with Hurricane Season Posted: October 17, 2012 at 09:18 PM (#4274905)
i know that women bring their sons into the ladies room - often until the kid is 8 or 9, but what do single dads with a daughter do when daddy has to go? you can't take your daughter into a mens room unless she is too young to walk

Safeco has some "Family" bathrooms, just a single hole provate room for this purpose.

The first time I saw a trough urinal was as a wee lad at Fenway Park. I didn't know what to do.
   47. Commissioner Bud Black Beltre Hillman Posted: October 17, 2012 at 09:32 PM (#4274927)
In the early days of AT&T Park I was in a line like this once when I had a lot of beers needing release. It got to where there was just no way I was gonna make it so I left the line in search of some dark corner. I ended up kinda underneath the bleachers where there was a bathroom that almost nobody was using. Wall-to-wall open urinals. Still one of the happiest moments of my life.
Indeed, the bathrooms (and concessions) under the bleachers generally have much shorter lines. But don't tell anybody!
   48. The Ghost's Tryin' to Reason with Hurricane Season Posted: October 17, 2012 at 09:40 PM (#4274936)
That was one of the big improvements when the Kingdome gave way to Safeco - more bathrooms. I'd have thought the newer places would have all handled that better.
   49. McCoy Posted: October 17, 2012 at 10:20 PM (#4274958)
Sounds a bit like that single block of unregulated street parking within a 15 minute walk of Nationals Park.

And no, I ain't telling, and neither should you.


I know where it is. I accept cash. For telling or not telling.
   50. Answer Guy Posted: October 17, 2012 at 10:35 PM (#4274970)
And no, I ain't telling, and neither should you.


My lips are sealed.
   51. base ball chick Posted: October 17, 2012 at 10:43 PM (#4274978)
The Ghost, elitist lollygagging neck-stabber Posted: October 17, 2012 at 09:18 PM (#4274905)

i know that women bring their sons into the ladies room - often until the kid is 8 or 9, but what do single dads with a daughter do when daddy has to go? you can't take your daughter into a mens room unless she is too young to walk

Safeco has some "Family" bathrooms, just a single hole private room for this purpose.


- so you take your daughter into the bathroom while YOU pee?

every time i read about troughs it makes me glad i'm female

i can't yell at men for holding beer in one hand and youknowwhat in the other because in the ladies room, ALL THE TIME there are females talking on the phone when they are in the stall using it. no kidding.
   52. Answer Guy Posted: October 18, 2012 at 12:45 AM (#4275019)
every time i read about troughs it makes me glad i'm female


They're pretty rare these days.
   53. Forsch 10 From Navarone (Dayn) Posted: October 18, 2012 at 02:02 AM (#4275045)
I'm proud to have played a small part in prompting this discussion.
   54. JoeHova Posted: October 18, 2012 at 05:24 AM (#4275064)
- so you take your daughter into the bathroom while YOU pee?

I assume people only do that if no one else is around to watch the kid outside. I don't have any kids but I have a much younger brother and when I used to take him places when he was young, I definitely felt a sense of panic if I lost sight of him for a second. I wouldn't have left him out on a concourse unattended. But I'm the pessimistic type.
   55. JE (Jason) Posted: October 18, 2012 at 09:04 AM (#4275125)
Sounds a bit like that single block of unregulated street parking within a 15 minute walk of Nationals Park.

And no, I ain't telling, and neither should you.

Good thing too, Andy. I was about to stab you with cuticle scissors.
   56. Traderdave Posted: October 18, 2012 at 09:38 AM (#4275149)
I take my daughters everywhere -- ballgames, museums, walks through Chinatown, I love taking them out for jaunts around town. For the last few years they've been using the ladies room on their own, but before that, I just took them into the mens room. No big deal. When they were really small, I took them to a stall myself. When they were a bit older, I waited outside the stall and did my business while they washed their hands.

All they ever saw were men facing away from them at urinals, standing in line for urinals or washing their hands. I've never seen a public mens room that was a wee wee waving festival that would damage little girls' psyches.

Of course I never took them anyplace rowdy, like The Wrigley bleachers or CBGB, where the odds of bathroom depravity were high, but that's just common sense. Really, it was never a big deal at all.

And troughs are special. When I finally rebuild my garage into the Awesome Man Cave of my dreams, the bathroom will have a trough, price be damned.
   57. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: October 18, 2012 at 11:55 AM (#4275264)
I'll use this as an excuse to throw in a shout-out for the films of Luis Buñuel in general...


And now I'm imagining "The Exterminating Angel", only set in an overcrowded stadium bathroom.
   58. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: October 18, 2012 at 11:56 AM (#4275266)
When I finally rebuild my garage into the Awesome Man Cave of my dreams, the bathroom will have a trough, price be damned.


Be careful. Adding a urinal to your house knocks five figures off the price.

I guess you might be able to pitch a trough as a utility sink, if a female buyer's never seen one before.
   59. Tulo's Fishy Mullet (mrams) Posted: October 18, 2012 at 12:00 PM (#4275275)
when my 3 yr old daughter sees the urinals as we walk to the stall, she always points at them "Those are for boys."
   60. Tulo's Fishy Mullet (mrams) Posted: October 18, 2012 at 12:10 PM (#4275298)
Kohler's 48 inch trough urinal

not certain how much this costs, not counting other plumbing related parts, but a stainless steel urinal costs about $2000-$2500 bucks.
I only know this because I remember charging a guy once and one of his bad deeds was destroying a stainless steel urinal at a tavern, and the cost was in that range.
   61. Answer Guy Posted: October 18, 2012 at 12:19 PM (#4275322)
Be careful. Adding a urinal to your house knocks five figures off the price.


I know a gay couple that put one in their residence.

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