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Friday, October 04, 2013

The Deadspin Twitter -100*: The 73 Worst Accounts In Sports

5. Joe Sheehan (@joe_sheehan), baseball writer

Brave iconoclast will spare no one in his assault on 1997’s conventional wisdom.

9. Brian Kenny (@mrbriankenny), baseball pundit

“F*** off! ‘Judean People’s Front.’ We’re the People’s Front of Judea!”

14. Scott Miller (@scottmcbs), baseball writer

The sort of s***t-peddling white-guy columnist who loves to write about “immature” Hispanic ballplayers. Half-literate moron.

39. Jon Heyman (@JonHemanCBS), baseball writer

He’s like a carbon copy of colleague Scott Miller, but dumber.

And they do get themselves, too:

52. Tim Marchman (@timmarchman), Deadspin deputy editor

“Am I too precious to write Hot Takes, or am I just too lazy to write them longer than 140 characters? I can’t decide!”

Mike Emeigh Posted: October 04, 2013 at 08:33 PM | 34 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: parody, twitter

Reader Comments and Retorts

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Statements posted here are those of our readers and do not represent the BaseballThinkFactory. Names are provided by the poster and are not verified. We ask that posters follow our submission policy. Please report any inappropriate comments.

   1. Harveys Wallbangers Posted: October 04, 2013 at 09:44 PM (#4560455)
amusing

26. Katie Baker (@katiebakes), writer for Grantland

Wedding scorecards, hockey galore, and gentle ribbing of Martha Stewart. It’s like having a marginally hip Canadian aunt.


more amusing

31. Mark May (@mark_may), college football pundit

The dumbest sports pundit on TV is somehow even dumber on Twitter.


   2. DA Baracus Posted: October 04, 2013 at 09:55 PM (#4560474)
This is one half a good list of hacks and one half a roast of good follows.
   3. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: October 04, 2013 at 10:04 PM (#4560484)
I thought Marchman was at The Classical.

My account sucks, but I only tweet every six months or so.
   4. Monty Posted: October 04, 2013 at 10:10 PM (#4560490)
There are some pretty good lines in there.

17. Dave Zirin (@EdgeofSports), sports columnist

Speaks truth to power when not pimping himself to Grantland.
   5. The Anthony Kennedy of BBTF (Scott) Posted: October 04, 2013 at 11:07 PM (#4560526)
The Iron Sheik truly does have a brilliant twitter feed.

73. Deadspin (@Deadspin), official Twitter account of Deadspin

You won't believe how fast the high tone and sanctimony yield to SEO when it's time to scrabble for traffic [VIDEO]
   6. boteman Posted: October 04, 2013 at 11:14 PM (#4560532)
Following 100 accounts, or even 73, is pointless. For the purposes of this article, I follow 2 Marlins writers, Ken Rosenthal, 3 beat writers covering the Nationals, and maybe 1 other that I've forgotten about right now. It's an echo chamber. Joe Capozzi posts that the Marlins have traded away Giancarlo Stanton and within seconds all the other accounts are retweeting it.

I actually follow a small handful of trustworthy folks who act as filters, unbeknownst to them. That's a better way to do it.
   7. Crosseyed and Painless Posted: October 05, 2013 at 01:00 AM (#4560599)
That was hilarious and kept me from chewing my nails during the end of this Tigers game.

I'm a Twitter addict, and amazingly follow none of those accounts. So, yay me? Nope, still waste too much time online.
   8. Shibal Posted: October 05, 2013 at 01:38 AM (#4560612)
I follow over 600 and am always looking out for more. I don't have a problem with people retweeting generic news; just noise to me and easily ignored. But you get a lot of different views on stuff from a diverse crowd on Twitter; well worth the occasional turds.
   9. Oscar Geronimo Posted: October 05, 2013 at 07:30 AM (#4560628)
That Isiah Thomas tweet (#47) just made my day.
   10. zonk Posted: October 05, 2013 at 08:58 AM (#4560648)
Deadspin gets plenty of (often deserved) grief, but I still generally consider it one of the 10 or so most regularly amusing 'interwebs empires' around...
   11. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 10:26 AM (#4560686)
Gammons cracks me up. He's the Chuck Grassley of sports.
   12. Depressoteric feels Royally blue these days Posted: October 05, 2013 at 10:39 AM (#4560693)
Boy did they nail Joe Sheehan dead to rights. He's reaching MGL-levels of insufferability these days.
   13. Weekly Journalist_ Posted: October 05, 2013 at 10:43 AM (#4560696)
My god, who is this War Machine guy? Can the President have him executed as under the necessary and proper clause of the consitution?
   14. Harveys Wallbangers Posted: October 05, 2013 at 10:59 AM (#4560701)
Eso

Because Sheehan doesn't actually understand stat analysis if you followed his statements to a reasonable conclusion then the only thing about a season that matters is that it happened.

   15. Depressoteric feels Royally blue these days Posted: October 05, 2013 at 11:07 AM (#4560705)
Because Sheehan doesn't actually understand stat analysis if you followed his statements to a reasonable conclusion then the only thing about a season that matters is that it happened.
Yes, my thoughts exactly; I've always noticed that about his writing...it's strangely, I dunno how I'd say this, 'determinist.'

Deadspin missed the obvious Scott Boras-related crack on Jon Heyman. Disappointed at that.

By the way people, half the fun of this article is in the "representative tweets" they chose for each writer. They're almost certainly unfair, but the Pete Gammons and Dave Zirin ones in particular are riotously perfect selections.
   16. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 11:48 AM (#4560735)
How come people like Sheehan work in the industry, while my blogging career never took off? I tried for a couple of years, even sent some queries out but no one seemed interested. Eventually, I got the clue and realized it was only a hobby and now contribute something a couple of times to a Red Sox blog. But I sometimes regret putting in the time blogging instead of spending it on my "real" career.
   17. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 11:51 AM (#4560737)
PS - That was a rhetorical question. I know the answer to it already.
   18. PASTE Thinks This Trout Kid Might Be OK (Zeth) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 12:03 PM (#4560741)
Yeah, I went through a period where I thought I was going to be a widely read baseball blogger and life would be awesome. Eventually I came to understand that I am neither good enough of a writer or knowledgeable enough about baseball to make that come to fruition. Now I satisfy my baseball/writing urges by making frequently caustic and occasionally wrong posts on BTF.
   19. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 12:27 PM (#4560754)
I really appreciate that post, Zeth. Knowing that I am not alone makes me feel better. I still plan to write and perhaps finally write a whole book when I retire, but I won't expect anyone to read it, except my wife.
   20. rr Posted: October 05, 2013 at 01:34 PM (#4560795)
I am not usually a Deadspin fan, but I found this pretty clever.
   21. boteman Posted: October 05, 2013 at 01:42 PM (#4560805)
Writers serve the same function as talking heads on television: to sell advertising. Once you understand that, then you understand why so many write such outright stupid or controversial stuff; they're trying to attract eyeballs to their site or newspaper or magazine or channel so that they can sell you stuff.

This is why I can't get exercised over too much of this stuff, it really is mostly noise. Repoz take note.
   22. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 01:52 PM (#4560818)
Yeah, the guy in the New London newspaper writes some columns straight out of a Shaughnessy/Plaschke template. Half his columns are on hyperlocal things I don't care about. 25% are awful and 25% make valid points, but they are in that sportswriterese forced casual style with one word sentences and one sentence paragraphs. He understands narrative very well, I'll give him that, but he couldn't analyze his way out of a paper bag.
   23. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 02:03 PM (#4560823)
The best sports twitter feed? Jose Canseco, hands down.
   24. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 02:15 PM (#4560827)
When I used to be able to access Twitter at work, I found Buzz Bissinger to be entertaining in a sad way.
   25. PreservedFish Posted: October 05, 2013 at 03:03 PM (#4560844)
Re: Zeth, GGC. I believe the primary thing separating some known bloggers from the would-be's is probably ambition/drive. There are a number of guys that get linked here that are really just unimpressive. Inelegant writing, poor analysis, etc. But I bet they hustled their asses off to get where they are now.
   26. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 03:06 PM (#4560846)
My god, who is this War Machine guy? Can the President have him executed as under the necessary and proper clause of the consitution?


MMA fighter (and briefly, porn star) with mental problems and a history of outside-the-cage violence. Depressing and disgusting in roughly equal proportions, putting him in the same general class as a guy like Charles Bennett.
   27. PASTE Thinks This Trout Kid Might Be OK (Zeth) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 03:20 PM (#4560847)
Re: Zeth, GGC. I believe the primary thing separating some known bloggers from the would-be's is probably ambition/drive. There are a number of guys that get linked here that are really just unimpressive. Inelegant writing, poor analysis, etc.


Such as myself back in the day!

You may have a point; I never really had enough time to dedicate to baseball writing to raise it above hobby status, between working a day job, working on freelance proofreading/editing/tutoring on the side, and doing my best to remain married. And once it dawned in me it wasn't really going anywhere I opted to take up different hobbies.

Then again, in many highly areas of life that require highly developed skills (I'm looking at you, graphic design) there are people everywhere you look convinced that lack of time and opportunity are keeping them from being rich and famous, when in fact it's lack of talent and/or lack of willingness to work.

It's the hipster trap: creating artistic endeavors anyone would want to pay for requires work in enormous quantities.
   28. Crispix reaches boiling point with lackluster play Posted: October 05, 2013 at 03:43 PM (#4560854)
Gammons cracks me up. He's the Chuck Grassley of sports.

Him or Johnny Bench, yes.
   29. charityslave is thinking about baseball Posted: October 05, 2013 at 06:37 PM (#4560945)
Brandon McCarthy is great (@bmccarthy32).. But he's no @hoedeehoe.
   30. Dog on the sidewalk Posted: October 05, 2013 at 07:36 PM (#4561008)
I must be a very old 27, because the vast majority of the the descriptions and sample tweets just left me confused.
   31. Super Creepy Derek Lowe (GGC) Posted: October 05, 2013 at 08:43 PM (#4561060)
creating artistic endeavors anyone would want to pay for requires work in enormous quantities.


I couldn't sustain the output of a Calcaterra or Gleeman and do a good job of writing. It took me years to learn how to revise and edit my own work and it is still a work in progress. And nowadays, it seems like the guy that takes time to do that loses because his work is irrelevant by the time it is done. I am exaggerrating, but that's what it feels like. But a lot of my stuff wasn't timely anyways. If anyone reads thru the back catalog of Designated Sitter, there are a lot of posts about how Leo Durocher was in some sitcom with the son of some guy who killed the brother of his old first baseman and stuff like that. Stuff like that never goes out of style because its never draws much of an audience in the first place. My better stuff was usually at least a couple of weeks in the making. No Fear was supposed to be about the 1994 White Sox, but I started out with a tangent that grew into something that I liked much better about a trip I made to Comiskey in 1990.
   32. Howie Menckel Posted: October 05, 2013 at 09:59 PM (#4561118)
"Following 100 accounts, or even 73, is pointless."

Probably not. But your point about avoiding following a full set of redundant people stands.

"I actually follow a small handful of trustworthy folks who act as filters, unbeknownst to them. That's a better way to do it."

I did a post the other day that got four-figure hits, many multiples of that in terms of eyeballs that got the basic info without clicking the link, and 50+ reweets - but only 4 more people climbed aboard to "follow" because of it. They do the same thing you do - no need to follow me, because "that guy" that they follow, he follows me and passes along the stuff that YOU need to know.

Same goes for links inside a blog post - no matter how much you say, "You MUST click in for the rest!" - the consumer thinks you're actually giving him all the stuff he really needs in the short blog post (and he may well be right).

I'm guilty of the same thing while being the consumer.
:)

   33. What's the realistic upside, RMc? Posted: October 06, 2013 at 10:55 AM (#4561562)
It’s like having a marginally hip Canadian aunt.

I had one of those once, my Dad's sister, who lived in Thunder Bay, Ontario. Died of cancer back in '98. (I miss you, Auntie Cathy.)
   34. Infinite Joost (Voxter) Posted: October 06, 2013 at 11:13 AM (#4561578)
The Iron Sheik truly does have a brilliant twitter feed.


It's majestic. I learned about it from The Bugle, and now it's the only Twitter account I ever check.

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