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Wednesday, April 04, 2012

The Just-In-Case OPENING NIGHT GAME CHATTER (Cardinals vs. Marlins)

Game 3 of approx. 2430.

St. Louis Cardinals vs. Miami Marlins
Kyle Lohse vs. Josh Johnson

ESPN. 7 PM EST.

Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:43 AM | 317 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: cardinals, marlins

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   1. charityslave is thinking about baseball Posted: April 04, 2012 at 08:23 AM (#4096301)
I'm putting my order in now- one deep drive into the center field wall curve by Jose Reyes, please.
   2. Rants Mulliniks Posted: April 04, 2012 at 08:32 AM (#4096307)
Woohoo!!
   3. Jose Is The Most Absurd Thing on the Site Posted: April 04, 2012 at 08:46 AM (#4096311)
Baseball baseball baseball!!!
   4. Greg K Posted: April 04, 2012 at 09:05 AM (#4096317)
Is Carpenter hurt? Kyle Lohse seems like an underwhelming Opening Day starter, for however much that matters.
   5. JJ1986 Posted: April 04, 2012 at 09:09 AM (#4096322)
Carpenter is hurt, but Wainwright isn't.
   6. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 09:10 AM (#4096323)
Is Carpenter hurt? Kyle Lohse seems like an underwhelming Opening Day starter, for however much that matters.


Carpenter is hurt. They are saving Wainwright for home opener (similar to how the Phillies have Hamels saved for home opener)
   7. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 09:10 AM (#4096324)
oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy oh boy!
   8. Dock Ellis on Acid Posted: April 04, 2012 at 09:11 AM (#4096327)
I can hardly wait! I hope Miami hits one million home runs.
   9. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 09:16 AM (#4096329)
Maybe I should do a checklist for tonight...
   10. Phil Coorey is a T-Shirt Salesman Posted: April 04, 2012 at 10:41 AM (#4096436)
Maybe I should do a checklist for tonight...


please!
   11. Rickey! trades in sheep and threats Posted: April 04, 2012 at 10:45 AM (#4096440)
Asteroid! Asteroid!
   12. Lance Posted: April 04, 2012 at 11:32 AM (#4096500)
Can someone explain why we have a one game series to open the season tonight (ignoring the games in Japan)?
   13. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 11:42 AM (#4096519)
Can someone explain why we have a one game series to open the season tonight (ignoring the games in Japan)?

Probably not.
   14. salvomania Posted: April 04, 2012 at 11:45 AM (#4096524)
Can someone explain why we have a one game series to open the season tonight (ignoring the games in Japan)?


It's a preview for next season, when the 15-team leagues will necessitate continual 1-game series between an NL and AL team over the entire course of the season.
   15. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 11:54 AM (#4096538)
Okay, checklist:
Flashback to the Day of 162 last season, for any reason [ ]
Whatever the regular season equiv. of a Conradian play is [ ]
Dramatic late-inning (7th or later) homer [ ]
1-2-3 inning [ ]
Strike out of side [ ]
Pitcher gets a hit [ ]
The little aquariums in the new Marlins ballpark [ ]
The home-run celebration statue... thing [ ]
Reference to Miami Heat [ ]
More than three references to Albert Pujols [ ]
Audible swear word [ ]
Reference to how the Orange Bowl used to be there [ ]
Somebody makes a prediction for who will win the World Series [ ]
More than three references to LaRussa [ ]
Reyes gets extra bases [ ]
Reference to how X is the first to X in Marlins Park [ ]
Reference to extra wild card [ ]
Billy Marlin appearance [ ]
Reference to games in Japan [ ]
SB [ ]
Caught Stealing [ ]
Sac Bunt [ ]
Reference to advanced statistics [ ]
   16. phredbird Posted: April 04, 2012 at 12:48 PM (#4096597)
good list. there should be an over and under about when pujols is first mentioned. probably within the first 30 seconds of the telecast.
   17. Swedish Chef Posted: April 04, 2012 at 12:50 PM (#4096599)
The home-run celebration statue... thing [ ] malfunctions [ ] falls apart [ ]
   18. PreservedFish Posted: April 04, 2012 at 12:59 PM (#4096606)
Giancarlo Stanton is called Mike Stanton [ ]
   19. Mike Emeigh Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:06 PM (#4096612)
More than three references to Albert Pujols [ ]


I'll take the over. Maybe you should add "before the game starts" and/or "before the third inning" to the checkboxes.

-- MWE
   20. Guapo Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:07 PM (#4096614)
Ozzie Guillen on-field argument [ ]
"Miami Vice" theme song played [ ]
   21. Random Transaction Generator Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:18 PM (#4096634)
The little aquariums in the new Marlins ballpark [ ] fish eaten or found dead, on camera [ ]
Miami Sound Machine song played [ ]
Rain delay [ ]
   22. Mike Emeigh Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:19 PM (#4096636)
From Twitter, Marlins lineup:

Reyes 6, Bonifacio 8, Ramirez 5, Stanton 9, Morrison 7, Sanchez 3, Infante 4, Buck 2, Johnson 1

-- MWE
   23. Mike Emeigh Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:23 PM (#4096642)
Cardinals: Furcal 6, Beltran 9, Holliday 7, Berkman 3, Freese 5, Molina 2, Jay 8, Descalso 4, Lohse 1

-- MWE
   24. Misirlou's been working for the drug squad Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:37 PM (#4096665)
Rain delay [ ]


It's April. It doesn't rain in south Florida in April.
   25. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:39 PM (#4096667)
Carpenter is hurt. They are saving Wainwright for home opener (similar to how the Phillies have Hamels saved for home opener)

The Phils are running out Halladay and Lee first, so that's not surprising. Worley is scheduled for Game 3, I think the Phils want to break up Lee and Hamels in the rotation. Personally, I would have started Hamels in Game 1 (then Halladay, Lee, Worley), for two reasons. Mainly to pitch the best 3 pitchers as much as possible and to break up the lefties. Secondarily, just in case throwing him the bone of opening day made him any more desirous of staying with the Phils.
   26. snapper (history's 42nd greatest monster) Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:40 PM (#4096669)
just in case throwing him the bone of opening day made him any more desirous of staying with the Phils.

Is the bone wrapped in $150M worth of $100 bills?
   27. Tom Nawrocki Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:44 PM (#4096676)
Shot of Jose Reyes and Hanley Ramirez pretending to be friendly [ ]
   28. Mike Emeigh Posted: April 04, 2012 at 01:48 PM (#4096683)
It's April. It doesn't rain in south Florida in April.


More to the point, this ballpark has a retractable roof that will almost certainly be closed before any rain makes an appearance.

-- MWE
   29. The Piehole of David Wells Posted: April 04, 2012 at 02:37 PM (#4096760)
Who's the broadcast team?
   30. The Piehole of David Wells Posted: April 04, 2012 at 02:45 PM (#4096769)
Also, someone alert management. Let's make sure there's a proper game thread. This one is almost sure to be buried by game time.
   31. Jose Is The Most Absurd Thing on the Site Posted: April 04, 2012 at 02:46 PM (#4096770)
Shulman, Hershiser and Tito. They then have to hop a flight to Detroit for the 1PM start with Boston and the Tigers. Expect to hear some comments about the short night if tonight's game runs long.
   32. Jose Is The Most Absurd Thing on the Site Posted: April 04, 2012 at 02:47 PM (#4096771)
Awful Announcing has all the national teams for the games through Sunday.
   33. villageidiom Posted: April 04, 2012 at 03:05 PM (#4096799)
The home-run celebration statue... thing [ ]

...Discussed before used [ ]
...Shown in use, live [ ]
- - - -

Also...
Hanley Ramirez making an error [ ]

- - - -

Reference to how the Orange Bowl used to be there [ ]


Google Earth has historical views. My son and I were looking at Marlins Park construction the other day, and I showed him what was there a few years ago. Fun.
   34. salvomania Posted: April 04, 2012 at 03:53 PM (#4096864)
I see Tyler Greene remains buried.
   35. Mike Emeigh Posted: April 04, 2012 at 04:03 PM (#4096881)
I see Tyler Greene remains buried.


I expect this will be a platoon, with Greene being on the short side of it. FWIW, Greene is three years older than Descalso.

-- MWE
   36. Guapo Posted: April 04, 2012 at 04:11 PM (#4096886)
Any Primates going to this game?
   37. CrosbyBird Posted: April 04, 2012 at 04:14 PM (#4096890)
The Marlins may not be the best team in baseball, but I think they'll be the most exciting team this year. They're going to be running all the time.
   38. Bourbon Samurai Posted: April 04, 2012 at 04:23 PM (#4096899)
Hooooray baseball! This is on ESPN right?
   39. Random Transaction Generator Posted: April 04, 2012 at 04:34 PM (#4096915)
More to the point, this ballpark has a retractable roof that will almost certainly be closed before any rain makes an appearance.

I'll point out that Skydome in Toronto (as it was called then) also has a retractable roof... and that there was a rain delay during the third game ever played in there.

I stand by my checklist entry.
   40. zonk Posted: April 04, 2012 at 04:46 PM (#4096926)
The Cubs just snagged Luis Valbuena off waivers from the Jays -- any word on whether the non-opening opening night will be pushed back to allow the seismic ripples to calm?
   41. Fancy Pants Handles lap changes with class Posted: April 04, 2012 at 05:11 PM (#4096954)
The home-run celebration statue... thing [ ] malfunctions [ ] falls apart [ ] unexpectedly launches itself into space* [ ]

*and yes, I stole that plot from Tetris
   42. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:07 PM (#4096999)
The only time I will ever be happy for pre-game, or watch it, is today.

Who had 52 minutes before the game on the Pujols under?
   43. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:12 PM (#4097004)
The checklist so far. Everything take effect after the National Anthem or whatever. It is now closed and only an awesome suggestion will make it. As occurred last year, to save space the entire list will only be posted once a page (unless there is a flurry of checklist items to the point where it's obvious somebody in the booth is viewing this page).

Flashback to the Day of 162 last season, for any reason [ ]
Whatever the regular season equiv. of a Conradian play is [ ]
Hanley Ramirez does an error, Reg. Season Equiv of Conradian or not [ ]
Dramatic late-inning (7th or later) homer [ ]
1-2-3 inning [ ]
Strike out of side [ ]
Pitcher gets a hit [ ]
The little aquariums in the new Marlins ballpark [ ]
The home-run celebration statue... thing [ ]
...Discussed before used [ ]
...Shown in use, live [ ]
...Malfunctions [ ]
...falls apart [ ]
...unexpectedly launches itself into space [ ]
...achieves self-awareness and sends one of the animatronic flamingoes back in time to kill Sarah Connor []
Reference to Miami Heat [ ]
More than three references to Albert Pujols [ ]
Audible swear word [ ]
Reference to how the Orange Bowl used to be there [ ]
Somebody makes a prediction for who will win the World Series [ ]
More than three references to LaRussa [ ]
Reyes gets extra bases [ ]
Reference to how X is the first to X in Marlins Park [ ]
Reference to extra wild card [ ]
Billy Marlin appearance [ ]
Reference to games in Japan [ ]
SB [ ]
Caught Stealing [ ]
Sac Bunt [ ]
Reference to advanced statistics [ ]
Ozzie Guillen on-field argument [ ]
Rain Delay [ ] (Roof closes for other reason [ ])
Giancarlo is called Mike [ ]
That new Robinson Cano "This is Sportscenter" commercial airs [ ]
David Freese, October Hero [ ]
   44. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:14 PM (#4097007)
Can anyone find our game 6 WS chatter from last year?
   45. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:17 PM (#4097010)
Here it is.

If I remember correctly, there were at least two times where it basically crashed, so it gets a bit disorganized at times.
   46. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:20 PM (#4097013)
Thanks GB.
   47. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:26 PM (#4097020)
BTW, apparently whoever will throw out the first pitch is going to be worthy of a five-minute standing ovation.

Anybody want to make any guesses as to who it is?
   48. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:27 PM (#4097021)
This baseball bat feature is awful.
   49. Fancy Pants Handles lap changes with class Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:29 PM (#4097024)
Anybody want to make any guesses as to who it is?

Marty McFly on a hoverboard.
   50. Swedish Chef Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:34 PM (#4097028)
Anybody want to make any guesses as to who it is?

I'll have to go with Kim Jong-Un, the North Korean dynasty knows how to get the ovations.
   51. Fancy Pants Handles lap changes with class Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:35 PM (#4097029)
BTW, you can get the Cards at +170 right now. Must be pretty rare for the defending champions to open as that big of an underdog.
   52. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:42 PM (#4097033)
Boy, that roof looks pretty ugly open, from the top. That's the best design they could come up with?
   53. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:44 PM (#4097035)

Boy, that roof looks pretty ugly open, from the top. That's the best design they could come up with?


Too busy making the outfield statue thing.
   54. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:53 PM (#4097042)
Did they sell out? Has anyone said?
   55. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:53 PM (#4097044)
According to Twitter, apparently no less than the Greatest of All Time will be doing the first pitch.
   56. Dan Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:54 PM (#4097045)
I can't believe how many of those fans already have the new jerseys and caps. All these shots of the crowd and at least 75% of the crowd has at least one or the other if not both.

Didn't see a single person in the old stuff.
   57. Dan Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:55 PM (#4097046)
The park looks full, Lassus.
   58. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 06:56 PM (#4097047)
Opening Lineup escorted to the foul line by showgirls. Discuss.
   59. hokieneer Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:00 PM (#4097051)
How could you have forgotten about escorts in your checklist GB?
   60. McCoy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:00 PM (#4097052)
That's an ugly looking stadium. 10 years until it is considered an albatross?
   61. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:00 PM (#4097053)
Did they enter the National Anthem late?
   62. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:01 PM (#4097054)
ESPN manages to actually miss the start of the anthem. Nice work, WWL.


The park looks full, Lassus.

Yeah, they said 37,000.
   63. frannyzoo Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:01 PM (#4097057)
I saw the guitar first and thought Jimmy Buffet, but it's Jose ###### Feliciano. As in better than Jimmy Buffet.
   64. Guts Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:02 PM (#4097058)
All systems are go for the first Chatter of the year.

And we have SAILED past 3 Pujols references, like half an hour ago. That should have been handicapped.
   65. Replacement-Level Primate Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:02 PM (#4097059)
This game is blacked out on MLB.tv, right?
   66. frannyzoo Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:03 PM (#4097060)
Terry...the camera...over here....Terry...oh screw it, go back to Camera #1
   67. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:03 PM (#4097061)
Okay, checklist starts now that the anthem is done. One reference to LaRussa and Pujols already.
   68. Dale Sams Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:04 PM (#4097064)
Waiting to see if anyone else will make a "I thought Jose was just blind, not deaf" crack....waiting...waiting...
   69. PS is probably a sitcom character Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:06 PM (#4097065)
They're annoucing Loria, and no more than scattered boos? Did they pre-screen the crowd, Stephen Harper style?
   70. McCoy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:06 PM (#4097066)
Loria using Ali as cover so he doesn't get booed. Nice.
   71. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:06 PM (#4097067)
ALI! ALI! ALI! ALI!
   72. Guts Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:06 PM (#4097068)
I know when I think Marlins baseball, I think Muhammad Ali.
   73. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:06 PM (#4097069)
Maybe Ali will take a swing at Loria.

COME ON BRATTAIN, I KNOW YOU HAVE SOME POSSESSION IN YOU!
   74. Dale Sams Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:06 PM (#4097070)
Matheny to umps, "You're seriously not going to cover that thing in center field up? Really?"
   75. McCoy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:06 PM (#4097071)
I think they picked the wrong big athlete and are taking way too long to get that cart to the mound.

edit: Now they need the PA guy to tell them what to do. A horrible horrible start.
   76. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:07 PM (#4097072)
Who made this decision to drive a stake in the heart of the crowd, exactly? Nice work, Loria.

Can't even get the ALI chant going from the ANNOUNCER.

Good lord.

Ali is the exact age of my father. He looks 120, however, poor guy.
   77. frannyzoo Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:08 PM (#4097073)
Well, that went well.
   78. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:09 PM (#4097074)
It is a shame to see Ali like that.... truly tragic.

Also, guess what Miami fans: You suck. You can't even get a good Ali chant going? Is it possible to contract a team pregame?
   79. Guts Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:09 PM (#4097075)
That was horribly awkward all around.
   80. charityslave is thinking about baseball Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:09 PM (#4097076)
Oh jeez, that was awful. And why was Loria there?
   81. Bourbon Samurai Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:09 PM (#4097077)
Jesus that was hard to watch.
   82. McCoy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:09 PM (#4097078)
I'm pretty sure everyone in that crowd thinks Ali was simply a Will Smith role.
   83. Dale Sams Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:09 PM (#4097079)
What next Loria? Michael J. Fox to throw out the first pitch?
   84. Drew (Primakov, Gungho Iguanas) Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:10 PM (#4097080)
75 and 76: Exactly, exactly what I was thinking. And combined with the Trot Out to the Line Sponsored by Insert Vegas Casino Here....I already hate the team.
   85. Bourbon Samurai Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:11 PM (#4097081)
Ha mccoy that's what I thought to
   86. McCoy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:11 PM (#4097082)
What next Loria? Michael J. Fox to throw out the first pitch?


Stephen Hawking.
   87. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:12 PM (#4097085)
Oh, the Day of 162 has a montage!

Flashback to the Day of 162 last season, for any reason [X ]
   88. AndrewJ Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:12 PM (#4097086)
Now ESPN is replaying the highlights of last year's Game 162. Good times.
   89. hokieneer Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:13 PM (#4097087)
That's an ugly looking stadium. 10 years until it is considered an albatross?


That's also all I can think about (well besides the bad-taste of seeing Ali like that, with Loria, in what seemed like a 20 minute drive to get to the mound).

From the ugly ass roof (at least when it's open), to the monstrosity in center, to the what-the-#### shade of green on the walls, to the overall color scheme on the new logo .. it's all completely hideous.
   90. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:13 PM (#4097088)
David Freese, October Hero [X]
   91. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:14 PM (#4097089)
This revisit is painful. My GF is barely a Red Sox fan at all, but being from New England she actually burst into tears that night.
   92. McCoy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:14 PM (#4097091)
I think the stadium should be nicknamed "The Credit Card Swipee Thing".
   93. Gamingboy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:15 PM (#4097092)
Another Pujols reference. I think we are just one away...
   94. Flynn Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:15 PM (#4097093)
Ali made me feel really depressed. I don't think he's going to be around much longer. Looks like Smokin Joe is going to get a sparring partner soon.
   95. Los Angeles El Hombre of Anaheim Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:15 PM (#4097094)
This revisit is painful. My GF is barely a Red Sox fan at all, but being from New England she actually burst into tears that night.
That makes me smile.

Game on!
   96. McCoy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:16 PM (#4097095)
The vendors are wearing NEON GREEN SHIRTS! That is so freakin distracting. Luckily they tightened up the shot after the first pitch.
   97. Lassus Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:17 PM (#4097096)
I cannot not root for Jose - - - - as long as they aren't playing the Mets, then I will. Er, not, that is.
   98. Guts Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:17 PM (#4097097)
Nice first AB for Beltran as a Card.
   99. McCoy Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:18 PM (#4097099)
Ding-Ding-ding.
   100. Dale Sams Posted: April 04, 2012 at 07:18 PM (#4097101)
Lassus, I think she lied. If she were really from NE, then she knew the outcome was preordained.
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