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Tuesday, March 19, 2013

T.J. Simers: When Page 2 faces dire medical situation, Dodgers come in for the save

They tell me the first clue should have been when I fell getting out of bed. Again and again. By the way, I do not recommend sitting on a toilet and falling off toward the tub.

Fortunately, my training as an athlete — having played as much golf as I have — saved me.

I’m told I should have dialed 911. That’s funny. Marriott hotels do not have telephones between toilet and tub. And I’m a platinum member and usually get one of the better rooms.

By the way, I understand the true meaning of being a lifetime platinum member. It means there’s a good chance you might die in a hotel room.

I would have called the Bagger, who lives here, but while I was coming here, the son-in-law was taking the family to Disneyland. A spur-of-the-moment thing.

Reminded me of Angry Arte. I go one way, he goes the other.

As I contemplated life on the floor between toilet and tub, just knowing they clean their bathroom floors a lot more than the wife brought me a certain peace.

Eventually I rode the walls back to bed and decided I wouldn’t cover the Dodgers in the morning. I thought that would make me feel better.

Tripon Posted: March 19, 2013 at 01:14 AM | 19 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: dodgers

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   1. Tricky Dick Posted: March 19, 2013 at 09:03 AM (#4391037)
Scary experience.

They had me stay overnight so the nurses could practice taking blood in the dark. Brener and Tom Lasorda stopped by. Lasorda used the bathroom so I would know he was there with me the whole way.

The Times' obit writer emailed to wish me well.


Able to show some humor about a stroke.
   2. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: March 19, 2013 at 09:55 AM (#4391073)
It surprises me to say this, but I actually enjoyed reading that. Props to Simers for a genuinely funny and interesting column, and I hope he feels better soon.
   3. Rants Mulliniks Posted: March 19, 2013 at 10:04 AM (#4391083)
Able to show some humor about a stroke.


....and still able to be a prick about it:

just knowing they clean their bathroom floors a lot more than the wife brought me a certain peace.

   4. tshipman Posted: March 19, 2013 at 10:06 AM (#4391086)
By the way, I understand the true meaning of being a lifetime platinum member. It means there’s a good chance you might die in a hotel room.


This actually made me laugh out loud for the first time ever reading a Simers column.
   5. JimMusComp likes Billy Eppler.... Posted: March 19, 2013 at 10:09 AM (#4391091)
Well, TJ is an ass who could still refer to his son-in-law as the "bagger" while having a stroke. Or as he said that day the, "asksidhwksdjsj".

And I asked myself, "is that the last snark that I will write?"
   6. Dan Posted: March 19, 2013 at 10:44 AM (#4391117)
Hopefully he gets well, regardless of his asshattery and everything.

But he was pretty stupid to ignore the signs and it's hard to imagine a stupider response to what seems like an apparent issue. Falling repeatedly getting out of bed, walking into furniture, etc. Then he falls off the toilet and onto the floor, and his response is to crawl back to bed and call out of work with the intent of sitting alone in his hotel room all day? It never even occurs to him to go get checked out or to have someone aware of his situation or to check on him at least?
   7. GregD Posted: March 19, 2013 at 10:47 AM (#4391120)
But he was pretty stupid to ignore the signs and it's hard to imagine a stupider response to what seems like an apparent issue. Falling repeatedly getting out of bed, walking into furniture, etc. Then he falls off the toilet and onto the floor, and his response is to crawl back to bed and call out of work with the intent of sitting alone in his hotel room all day? It never even occurs to him to go get checked out or to have someone aware of his situation or to check on him at least?
Agree it's stupid but also think it's fairly common, especially among men.
   8. Shredder Posted: March 19, 2013 at 11:14 AM (#4391159)
Agree it's stupid but also think it's fairly common, especially among men.
And especially if this is his first major health scare (don't know if it is or not). Most people for most of their lives get sick, rest, and get better. It's not until that last thing doesn't happen that many of us get scared into going to a hospital or a doctor. I'm somewhat concerned that someday I'll just come down with something that feels like a flu, but is actually much worse (I mean, I don't lie in bed thinking about it, but it's a concern). I generally don't get very sick, and when I do, I heal fairly quickly, so I don't typically even get prescriptions for antibiotics. And while at may age I should really go in for a physical, there's a part of me that doesn't want to do so for fear of what the results could be (though I feel fine and am in good shape generally).
   9. Mellow Mouse, Benevolent Space Tyrant Posted: March 19, 2013 at 11:38 AM (#4391183)
Agree it's stupid but also think it's fairly common, especially among men.


I am convinced the reason married men live longer than unmarried men is the wife yells at them for being idiots and makes them go to the Doctor. I guess I doomed myself by getting a divorce. Though the ex is still around to yell at me as needed I guess.
   10. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: March 19, 2013 at 11:41 AM (#4391187)
But he was pretty stupid to ignore the signs and it's hard to imagine a stupider response to what seems like an apparent issue. Falling repeatedly getting out of bed, walking into furniture, etc. Then he falls off the toilet and onto the floor, and his response is to crawl back to bed and call out of work with the intent of sitting alone in his hotel room all day? It never even occurs to him to go get checked out or to have someone aware of his situation or to check on him at least?


I'm inclined to cut the guy a little slack - if your brain's not working properly (which it isn't if you just had a stroke), it's understandable why you might not be thinking clearly or making the best possible decisions.
   11. Ron J2 Posted: March 19, 2013 at 11:58 AM (#4391238)
Agree with both #7 and #10. Both from personal experience. It's been an eventful year. I was going to say that you never want to hear your doctor say, "Mr. Johnson we don't think you've had a stroke, but ..." But I guess it beats the hell out of, "You have had a stroke"
   12. Hang down your head, Tom Foley Posted: March 19, 2013 at 12:37 PM (#4391290)
Agree with both #7 and #10. Both from personal experience. It's been an eventful year. I was going to say that you never want to hear your doctor say, "Mr. Johnson we don't think you've had a stroke, but ..." But I guess it beats the hell out of, "You have had a stroke"


Both are better than not being able to hear "Mrs. Johnson, your husband had a stroke."
   13. GregD Posted: March 19, 2013 at 01:07 PM (#4391335)
Agree with both #7 and #10. Both from personal experience. It's been an eventful year. I was going to say that you never want to hear your doctor say, "Mr. Johnson we don't think you've had a stroke, but ..." But I guess it beats the hell out of, "You have had a stroke"
Hope you're doing alright, man.
   14. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: March 19, 2013 at 01:19 PM (#4391357)
Congratulations on not having a stroke, Ron. Keep it up!
   15. Ron J2 Posted: March 19, 2013 at 01:37 PM (#4391398)
#13, 14. Thanks. Could have died from not paying attention to warning signs but (after 3+ weeks in the hospital a few months back) I'm doing OK.
   16. Dale Sams Posted: March 19, 2013 at 02:15 PM (#4391471)
I am convinced the reason married men live longer than unmarried men is the wife yells at them for being idiots and makes them go to the Doctor


Or married men are more likely to be insured.
   17. Shredder Posted: March 19, 2013 at 06:43 PM (#4391849)
Or married men are more likely to be insured.
My insurance won't do me much good when my non-existent wife fails to demand that I go to a hospital.
   18. Justin T seeks a heterospecific consortship Posted: March 19, 2013 at 07:00 PM (#4391862)
I kinda figured it wasn't so much the wife making the husband go to the hospital but having someone around to call 911 when something goes wrong and the person in distress wouldn't be able to get to the phone him/herself.
   19. Pasta-diving Jeter (jmac66) Posted: March 19, 2013 at 07:01 PM (#4391863)
Congratulations on not having a stroke, Ron. Keep it up!

Ichiro could not have a stroke if he wanted to

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