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Transaction Oracle
— A Timely Look at Transactions as They Happen

Friday, December 16, 2005

Twins - Signed Batista

Minnesota Twins - Signed 3B Tony Batista to a 1-year contract for reasons completely unbeknownst to anyone that isn’t Terry Ryan.

This is the worst idea since the episode of Sesame Street in which they reenacted Die Kristallnacht outside Mr. Hooper’s store and Ernie starts a pornography business with Guy Smiley.

2006 ZiPS Projection - Tony Batista
————————————————————————————-
AB   R   H 2B 3B HR RBI BB SO SB   BA   OBP   SLG
————————————————————————————-
579 62 137 25 1 21 70 23 117   4 .237 .270 .392

 

Dan Szymborski Posted: December 16, 2005 at 06:08 AM | 26 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
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   1. Craig in MN Posted: December 16, 2005 at 07:11 AM (#1779794)
This is what I get for making fun of the Everett signing.

I expected a bad ZIPS projection, but not quite this bad. The Twins have about 5 internal options that are as good. It is a $1.25 million contract that could grow to $2 million if the rest of the team dies in a fiery crash and he is forced to get significant playing time. It's apparantly not a guaranteed contract; they could buy him out after spring training for a few hundred thousand.
   2. Dr. Vaux Posted: December 16, 2005 at 07:16 AM (#1779800)
I missed that one...
   3. The Keith Law Blog Blah Blah (battlekow) Posted: December 16, 2005 at 07:27 AM (#1779809)
Matt Moses' projection is .235/.291/.353. Ha.
   4. Ivan Grushenko of Hong Kong Posted: December 16, 2005 at 09:00 AM (#1779848)
What was wrong with Cuddyer at 3B again?
   5. Jurgen Maas Posted: December 16, 2005 at 09:11 AM (#1779851)
You could break Cuddyer's arm in April, and then break it again in June, and then once more in September for fun, and he'd still come up with a better line than that. Tiffee legally blind in both eyes wouldn't be much worse, and he'd at least be cheaper.

Worse move of the off-season bar none (at least the Padres can say they were making room for Barfield when they get hosed).
   6. Dr. Vaux Posted: December 16, 2005 at 09:28 AM (#1779858)
What about when the Padres traded Lawrence for Castilla?

At least this is only money.
   7. Kurt Bevacquaman! Posted: December 16, 2005 at 03:57 PM (#1780001)
Don't forget the Padres trading a warm body for Dewon Brazelton...
   8. Jimmy P Posted: December 16, 2005 at 04:07 PM (#1780011)
At least this is only money.


No, it's playing time, too. Good for the Indians and White Sox
   9. sunnyday2 Posted: December 16, 2005 at 04:07 PM (#1780013)
I can see it now. Next October when Gardy's tenure as Twins manager comes to an end:

Gardy: "But Terry, you told me to play Tony every day."
   10. RP Posted: December 16, 2005 at 04:26 PM (#1780048)
I hadn't really thought about the Padres moves in toto before. So they've traded Loretta, Lawrence, and Burroughs for Mirabelli, Castilla, and Brazelton? Wow. At least they resigned Giles.
   11. OlePerfesser Posted: December 16, 2005 at 05:06 PM (#1780133)
This is the worst idea since the episode of Sesame Street in which...

I laughed even harder at this line than I did at the idea that T.B.'s part of the answer to the Twinkies' offensive/3B issues. Thanks, Esteemed Oracle.

BTW, is it true the Cookie Monster has been replaced by the Carrot Monster? The world is going to hell...
   12. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: December 16, 2005 at 05:19 PM (#1780166)
"So they've traded Loretta, Lawrence, and Burroughs for Mirabelli, Castilla, and Brazelton?"

I hadn't really looked at the total package, either.

Man, are they screwed.
   13. 1k5v3L Posted: December 16, 2005 at 05:40 PM (#1780203)
Whoa. 21 homers. Would he lead the Twins in homers next year then?
   14. Dr. Vaux Posted: December 16, 2005 at 05:48 PM (#1780218)
What I've heard is that they've decided to have Cookie Monster talk about how he likes vegetables, and that cookies should be eaten in moderation.

I'm not sure that disrupts the canon so terribly much, since he's always eaten everything anyway, but it's just another example of their being too careful that's been going on for the past twenty years. Imagine--a show with a twenty-year decline phase that's in no danger of cancellation! It's a good thing Bernie Williams doesn't play on public television...
   15. The Answer to the TWolves (GMoney) Posted: December 16, 2005 at 06:36 PM (#1780291)
Nothing to see here. It's not guarenteed so if Tony sucks it up bad enough in spring training the Twins can dump him for nothing. Sad when the thought of Tony Batista is something that looks like an improvement on your in house non-Cuddyer options. Glenn Williams, Luis Rodriquez, Juan Castro, Terry Tiffee non of these guys inspire much confidence.

How about a Shawn Wooten ZiPS for the Metrodome?
   16. Jimmy P Posted: December 16, 2005 at 06:40 PM (#1780299)
What I've heard is that they've decided to have Cookie Monster talk about how he likes vegetables, and that cookies should be eaten in moderation.


Because kids like cookies because of a puppet, not because they are sugary and good. And, kids are overweight because of a puppet, not because most of their parents probably are, too.
   17. Dan Szymborski Posted: December 16, 2005 at 06:43 PM (#1780305)
ZiPS for Shawn W00t3n!!!111oneoneone in the Metrodome is 238/295/351.
   18. MM1f Posted: December 16, 2005 at 06:55 PM (#1780331)
"ZiPS for Shawn W00t3n!!!111oneoneone in the Metrodome is 238/295/351. "

LOLz
ROTFLMAO
PWN3D!
238/295/351?... n00b!
   19. Greasy Neale Heaton (Dan Lee) Posted: December 16, 2005 at 07:01 PM (#1780338)
Imagine--a show with a twenty-year decline phase that's in no danger of cancellation!

Give the Simpsons a couple more years and network TV will have one as well.
   20. Craig in MN Posted: December 16, 2005 at 07:23 PM (#1780394)
That Shawn Wooten, he's not Tony Batista. But he's close.
   21. RP Posted: December 16, 2005 at 07:28 PM (#1780405)
Give the Simpsons a couple more years and network TV will have one as well.

The beginning of the decline? Itchy and Scratchy Land, Fall 1995.

The fall off the cliff moment? The World Trade Center episode, Fall 1997.
   22. Dewey, Soupuss Not Doomed to Succeed Posted: December 16, 2005 at 07:36 PM (#1780418)
The beginning of the decline? Itchy and Scratchy Land, Fall 1995.

That was fall of 1994, actually.

/comic book guy
   23. RP Posted: December 16, 2005 at 08:03 PM (#1780484)
oops, you're right.
   24. Clemenza Posted: December 16, 2005 at 08:12 PM (#1780505)
Cookie Monster is alive and well. My son watches every morning and the big blue lug eats as much as ever.
   25. Infinite Joost (Voxter) Posted: December 16, 2005 at 09:37 PM (#1780679)
Yes there's Trouble. Right there in the Twin Cities. And Trouble starts with a T, which rhymes with B, and that stands for Batista.
   26. The Truth Posted: December 25, 2005 at 12:08 AM (#1793378)
How can this be the 'worst move' of the off season if it's a 1 year, low risk deal? If he steals AB's from Cuddyer I could see your points..

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