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Tuesday, April 07, 2020

Baseball Question of the Day: Challenge of the Baseball Immortals!

Pop quiz, hotshot!

A man with omnipotent powers appears in your living room, puts his hands on you and you are immediately teleported to a postcard-perfect baseball diamond in the middle of a clearing in a magical meadow. You almost cry due to sensory overload. “Is this heaven?” you ask to no one in particular.

The moment those words escape your lips, the man who teleported you morphs into a villainous archetype chosen by your subconscious and particularized to your own memory, experience and, perhaps, your fears. Maybe it’s Dracula. Maybe it’s Jason from the “Friday the 13th Movies.” In my case it is, of course, Tomax and Xamot, the twin commanders of the Crimson Guard and the co-CEOs of the international conglomerate Extensive Enterprises which bankrolls Cobra Command.

“You have one chance,” Tomax begins, “to save your life,” Xamot says, completing the sentence. “Chose your challenge,” they say in unison. Before you, a man appears out of thin air.

I haven’t a chance in any of these circumstances- any of you think you have one?


QLE Posted: April 07, 2020 at 12:53 AM | 7 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: pedro martinez, questions, rickey henderson, tony gwynn

Reader Comments and Retorts

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   1. Jose Canusee Posted: April 07, 2020 at 09:01 AM (#5937202)
No question it is the pitching one. Throw 50' arc bloopers. If I had even a HS fastball mix in a few ankle-high straightballs and the occasional purpose pitch. Of course if you are a LHP just keep drilling him and occasionally mix in a slider inside.
   2. winnipegwhip Posted: April 07, 2020 at 10:04 AM (#5937224)
If I have to face a major league pitcher I choose Charles "Victory" Faust of the New York Giants.
   3. villageidiom Posted: April 07, 2020 at 10:10 AM (#5937226)
I am confident that, in 10 pitches, I can bunt a ball at least 20 feet (fair or foul) off 1999 Pedro Martinez. I don't need to beat the throw to first? Perfect.

Never choose the Rickey one. Rickey can choose how hard he hits the ball. You're putting your life completely in his hands. Completely.
   4. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: April 07, 2020 at 10:22 AM (#5937231)
Foot race against Roy Campanella. Push-up contest against Dave Dravecky. Blocking pitches against Eddie Gaedel.
   5. winnipegwhip Posted: April 07, 2020 at 10:33 AM (#5937236)
Foot race against Roy Campanella

The winner can take on the winner of me versus Ernie Lombardi.
   6. Fernigal McGunnigle Posted: April 07, 2020 at 10:41 AM (#5937240)
I am confident that, in 10 pitches, I can bunt a ball at least 20 feet (fair or foul) off 1999 Pedro Martinez. I don't need to beat the throw to first? Perfect.
On pitch #1 you'd square up to bunt and miss. On pitch #2 Pedro would drill you in the solar plexus.
   7. villageidiom Posted: April 07, 2020 at 11:16 AM (#5937255)
On pitch #1 you'd square up to bunt and miss. On pitch #2 Pedro would drill you in the solar plexus.
And I could get it to carom off me at least 20 feet. He didn't say I had to make contact with the ball using the bat.

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