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Friday, February 17, 2006

S.I. Lidz: Darren Daulton explains his surreal life

Lidz, on Darren Daulton flipping his…

Darren (Dutch) Daulton is now a bona fide member of the Fifth Dimension. Not the singing group from the ‘60s known for such airy confections as Wedding Bell Blues and Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In. Daulton’s Fifth Dimension exists somewhere between Stoned Soul Picnic and Up, Up and Away. It’s a nether world that involves alchemy, auras, telepathy, energy transfers, astral planes, planetary ascension, parallel universes and other psychic phenomena too mind-boggling to catalogue here. I kid you not.

...Earth, Daulton believes, is entering a quadrant of space in which the “vibrational energy” will increase dramatically. “The Mayan calendar stops at Dec. 21, 2012—the date the Mayans believed the world would end,” he says. “On that day, at 11:11 a.m. Greenwich Mean Time, those who are ready to ascend will vanish from this plane of existence, like the crew of the Enterprise in Star Trek.”

Daulton hopes to beat the rush. “I can’t wait to disappear,” he says. “I’d disappear today if I could.”

 

Repoz Posted: February 17, 2006 at 08:16 AM | 413 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: projections

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   1. Lest we forget Posted: February 17, 2006 at 08:50 AM (#1865718)
"I'll look out the window and see a car passing with 1111 on the license plate. The car will turn into a driveway with 1111 on the mailbox."

You can't make this stuff up, people, nor deny its significance!

So when does Daulton start plucking young, impressionable coeds from the local universities for his cult? When he does, young primates please head south and sign up. Naturally, keep us updated. ; )
   2. Babe Ruths Chris Steak Posted: February 17, 2006 at 08:57 AM (#1865724)
A Real Estate Agent friend of mine (based in Texas) called me up last week. He said "Dude! I just saw Darren @#$%% Daulton!! He's looking for a place out here in the Waco area. His preference is a 'Compound' if I can find one. He was also asking about the ATF...weird"
   3. rLr Is King Of The Romans And Above Grammar Posted: February 17, 2006 at 09:02 AM (#1865728)
Behind which comet does Daulton's space-ship hide?
   4. Babe Ruths Chris Steak Posted: February 17, 2006 at 09:05 AM (#1865730)
Actually...I posted the previous without reading the article. Now that I've read it...it's not really funny. It's just Sad. The dude is @#$%^'d

(not just for burning up two model-wives, although that IS sad)
   5. rLr Is King Of The Romans And Above Grammar Posted: February 17, 2006 at 09:19 AM (#1865732)
Daulton hopes to beat the rush. "I can't wait to disappear," he says. "I'd disappear today if I could."

It would certainly get him out of abiding by the terms of his divorce, which seems to have been problematic.
   6. Jefferson Manship (Dan Lee) Posted: February 17, 2006 at 10:16 AM (#1865741)
I love that Repoz tagged this as a "projection".
   7. Hang down your head, Tom Foley Posted: February 17, 2006 at 11:49 AM (#1865749)
"I didn't have my first out-of-body experience until I was 35," he says. Curiously, the epiphany occurred at one of baseball's holiest shrines -- Wrigley Field. "I hit a line-drive just inside the third base line to help win a game," he recalls. "The strange thing was I didn't hit that ball. I never hit balls inside the third base line!"

That happened (or is currently happening) on August 27, 1997. The papers ignored the true significance of Daulton's at bat and chose to focus on Manny Alexander's two ninth inning errors that set it up.
   8. bob gee Posted: February 17, 2006 at 12:02 PM (#1865752)
i don't think there will be a big interview on dec 22, 2012 asking "umm, what happened?"

these type of nonsensical predictions almost never get covered in followup questions. years ago, they used to be front page stories of real newspapers; now, they only make the front pages of the tabloids, but they still get press.

then again, each year, 'psychics' make hundreds of wrong predictions, and still get called back for the next year. it's almost as bad as sports 'experts' going 50% on their picks, or worse...
   9. Mirabelli Dictu (Chris McClinch) Posted: February 17, 2006 at 12:03 PM (#1865754)
Crappy article, though. When you're dealing with a subject like this, you don't really need to interject snide one-liners to sell the wackiness of Darren Daulton.
   10. Jefferson Manship (Dan Lee) Posted: February 17, 2006 at 12:10 PM (#1865755)
   11. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: February 17, 2006 at 12:31 PM (#1865758)
“I’d disappear today if I could."
Is that the best setup line ever?
Is this what mixing 'roids and beer does to your brain?
   12. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 01:25 PM (#1865770)
the singing group from the ‘60s known for such airy confections as Wedding Bell Blues and Aquarius/Let the Sunshine In.

I think if I'd once been married to Darren Daulton, my time as a billboard girl for Hooters in Clearwater would seem like winning the Nobel Peace Prize by comparison.

But forget Darren Daulton. I rise today in defense of the Fifth Dimension! "Airy confections"??? Marilyn McCoo sings her heart out, asking the age-old question, "Won't you marry me, Bill (Davis, Jr.)?" and we call it an "airy confection"? This was one of the great ones, people! Groups like Fleetwood Mac owe them a debt for paving the way for the future musical tellings of intra-group personal soap operas.

Aguarius/Let the Sunshine In .... ok, that's an airy confection. But, I will add, one that was the # 1 song of 1969. The sad thing is that "Sugar Sugar" by The Archies was # 2. Sigh. Fortunately, such songs as "Get Together" by The Youngbloods and "Everyday People" by Sly and the Family Stone also populate the top 10, so it wasn't a total loss.
   13. Rally Posted: February 17, 2006 at 01:40 PM (#1865776)
After reading the intro's first paragraph I thought Daulton was marketing a new computer game or something.

Reading on, I see he must have really hit his head hard when Lenny crashed that car.
   14. Misirlou cut his hair and moved to Rome Posted: February 17, 2006 at 01:46 PM (#1865778)
i don't think there will be a big interview on dec 22, 2012 asking "umm, what happened?"

The thing is, he's covered there.

“On that day, at 11:11 a.m. Greenwich Mean Time, those who are ready to ascend will vanish from this plane of existence, like the crew of the Enterprise in Star Trek.”

Obviously, if he doesn't disappear, he wasn't ready.
   15. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: February 17, 2006 at 01:47 PM (#1865781)
Sam, I will join you in defense of 5D. One of my guilty pleasures is "One Less Bell To Answer". It's sappy but Marilyn does such a good job of singing her heart out on that one that I can't help but be sucked in.
   16. ThereGoesMoseby Posted: February 17, 2006 at 01:53 PM (#1865783)
I'm wondering if there were any 11th inning 11-11 ties in the last 11 years. Daulton was taken advantage of for this article. Lidz is like the bully who pretends to be friends with you and then humiliates you in front of the whole school.
   17. Uncle B Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:08 PM (#1865792)
Perhaps Daulton caught the end of this game.
   18. ColonelTom Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:26 PM (#1865800)
Yikes. And to think he was one of the names floated as a candidate for Phillies manager at one point. I hope he gets the help he needs.
   19. Devin has a deep burning passion for fuzzy socks Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:26 PM (#1865801)
Actually, I've never been that crazy about "Wedding Bell Blues", ironically because Marilyn puts too much force into her singing. It overwhelms the tinkly little background music and the whole song is just sort of off-kilter.
   20. philliephanatic Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:34 PM (#1865808)
I guess Daulton did in fact spend just enough time talking to Steve Carlton from 1984-1986 for the crazy virus to take hold, and that it has a dormancy period of about 20 years.

What is it about playing in Philly that drives baseball players mental? :-)
   21. TOLAXOR Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:41 PM (#1865814)
I HAVE "PAPER CUP" ON MY VIDEO IPOD...

IT'S A LOT OF FUN!!!

<BEGIN ERIC IDLE VOICE>

IF YOU LIKE THE FIFTH DIMENSION, YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE THE "WORLD OF KANE" BLOG!!!

<END ERIC IDLE VOICE>
   22. Spahn Insane Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:42 PM (#1865815)
Here, I thought Laura Nyro sang "Wedding Bell Blues." You mean it was a cover? I'm crushed.
   23. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:46 PM (#1865818)
Actually, I've never been that crazy about "Wedding Bell Blues", ironically because Marilyn puts too much force into her singing.

Devin, Devin, Devin . . . what are we going to do with you??? The woman is proposing to her boyfriend here! The guy she's been dating for frigging ever but he won't pop the question . . . . And -- in song, in front of the whole world, mind you -- she takes the dork by the schlong and says, "Marry me, you ####!" It's the drama of the backstory that makes it great!

Whenever I hear "Wedding Bell Blues," I imagine Billy Davis, Jr., walking into the studio one day, not having known about the song, and the rest of the group launches into it, Marilyn McCoo looking him right in the eye as she sings it. Awesome.
   24. Spahn Insane Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:50 PM (#1865822)
"I'll turn on the TV and see a baseball game tied at 11 in the 11th inning."

I'd comb retrosheet to see exactly how many games in the last 10 years have been tied at 11 in the 11th, but it's much less taxing to assume Daulton's cheese is off the cracker.
   25. Greg Maddux School of Reflexive Profanity Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:52 PM (#1865823)
Elaine: According to my source, the end of the world will be on February 14th in the year 2016.
Peter: Valentine's Day. Bummer. ... Where'd you get your date, Elaine?
Elaine: I received this information from an alien. As I told my husband, it was in the Paramus Holiday Inn. I was having a drink at the bar, alone, and this alien approached me. He started talking to me, he bought me a drink and then I think he must have used some kind of a ray or a mind control device, because he forced me to follow him to his room, and that's where he told me about the end of the world.
Peter: So your alien had a room at the Holiday Inn in Paramus?
Elaine: It might have been a room on the spacecraft made up to look like a room at the Holiday Inn. I can't be sure about that, Peter.
Peter: Of course not. And that's the whole problem with aliens, you just can't trust them. Occasionally you meet a nice one -- Starman, E.T. -- but usually they turn out to be some kind of big lizard!
   26. Roadblock Jones Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:58 PM (#1865828)
The 5th Dimension is some of the first music I can remember hearing. I also admire Franz Lidz: Everything he writes is a hoot.
   27. Boots Day Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:59 PM (#1865829)
The first verse of "If I Could Reach You" is just amazing. The rest of the song is pretty humdrum, though.
   28. Zonk demands an audit of your post Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:01 PM (#1865832)
Whoah!

I get the same weird thoughts and experience the same strange coincidences at 4:20 every day...

In any case, it sounds like some book jacket or forward to a quantum physics book had a profound effect on Darren.

Let's just hope -- for the animal's sake -- he doesn't own a cat ;-)
   29. Paul M Hates Krispy Kreme Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:10 PM (#1865842)
What is it about playing in Philly that drives baseball players mental?

Phillies fans.
   30. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:11 PM (#1865843)
Man, this is just really sad.

I caught a lot of flak the last time I said something about drunk driving, but Daulton really needs to have his license taken away for good. He's been arrested for DUI at least three times now, twice while driving with a suspended license, and there was a bench warrant out for him in the '90s for unpaid speeding tickets (including one for 100+ in a 65 zone). His second DUI arrest came after a single-vehicle accident, where he hit a median and skidded sideways into a tree, with another passenger in the car.
   31. Devin has a deep burning passion for fuzzy socks Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:17 PM (#1865852)
Well, first of all, Sam, I didn't know about the backstory (and I don't really think about the backstory with Fleetwood Mac songs either, I just like them). But it's not that Marilyn McCoo's vocals are too strong under any circumstances, it's just that they're too much for the music they're matched up with. If Aretha Franklin was singing "Respect" or "Think" with that accompaniment, I don't think it would work either. All I know is that when I hear the song, something about it always feels a little off to me.
   32. Jesse Barfield's Right Arm Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:24 PM (#1865860)
</i>I hope he gets the help he needs.<i>

Well, I agree if you are talking about drunk driving, but the metaphysics? I mean, we do live in a country based upon the virtues of the "Invisible Hand." If New-Age works for you (and gets you to focus on "energy waves" instead of the bottle), I say go for it.

Also, the idea that there are "vibrating" energies in the fourth or fifth dimmension is not hooey, it right out of string theory. I imagine if Daulton was asked to explain the virutes of capitalism and democracy, he would come off sounding equally as weird.
   33. Repoz Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:30 PM (#1865867)
a bench warrant out for him in the '90s for unpaid speeding tickets (including one for 100+ in a 65 zone)

Well then by all means make Darren Daulton the NJ State Attorney General!
   34. Jefferson Manship (Dan Lee) Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:37 PM (#1865876)
Well then by all means make Darren Daulton the NJ State Attorney General!

Arthur W. Magee would be so pissed off if that happened.
   35. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:42 PM (#1865879)
Daulton really needs to have his license taken away for good. He's been arrested for DUI at least three times now, twice while driving with a suspended license, and there was a bench warrant out for him in the '90s for unpaid speeding tickets (including one for 100+ in a 65 zone).

Darren Daulton: the Eddie Sutton of baseball.
   36. Dan 'The Boy' Werr Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:47 PM (#1865883)
The sad thing is that "Sugar Sugar" by The Archies was # 2. Sigh. Fortunately, such songs as "Get Together" by The Youngbloods and "Everyday People" by Sly and the Family Stone also populate the top 10, so it wasn't a total loss.

"Sugar Sugar" is better than both those songs. Especially the Youngbloods one.
   37. Dan 'The Boy' Werr Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:49 PM (#1865886)
“On that day, at 11:11 a.m. Greenwich Mean Time, those who are ready to ascend will vanish from this plane of existence, like the crew of the Enterprise in Star Trek.”

Is this serious? If you're describing your deeply held beliefs, I'd try to omit the phrase "like the crew of the Enterprise in Star Trek."
   38. Zonk demands an audit of your post Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:52 PM (#1865891)
Well, I agree if you are talking about drunk driving, but the metaphysics? I mean, we do live in a country based upon the virtues of the "Invisible Hand." If New-Age works for you (and gets you to focus on "energy waves" instead of the bottle), I say go for it.

Also, the idea that there are "vibrating" energies in the fourth or fifth dimmension is not hooey, it right out of string theory.


No doubt -

The "problem" -- or the start of it -- is that Daulton takes snippets and slices of actual theories and models of the universe, then juices them with his own sort of intellectual steroid cocktail, making huge leaps and absolute pronouncements on their validity, interpretation and application.

Nothing terribly wrong with that - at least, so long as some backwater school district isn't using Darren Daulton's Physics for Dummies for its science texts. It generally would just make you annoying, not necessarily "in need of help" (at least, no more than the rest of us).

Combine that, though, with the multiple DUIs, restraining orders from former spouses (plus -the offhand way he dismisses the concerns of his former spouse), looking for a "compound" with lots of questions about the ATF, a cavalier attitude -- or, lack of attitude -- concerning good/evil or right/wrong ---

And yeah -- sorry, Darren needs a bit of help. Even if we accept that everyone has the right to be a danger to themselves, there are a lot of red lights in this article that portend dangers to others beyond DD personally.
   39. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:55 PM (#1865892)
"Sugar Sugar" is better than both those songs. Especially the Youngbloods one.

Huh? These lyrics:

Oh, Honey Honey.
You are my candy girl,
and you got me wanting you.
Honey,
Oh, Sugar, Sugar.
You are my candy girl
and you got me wanting you.

I just can't believe the loveliness of loving you.
(I just can't believe it's true).
I just can't believe the wonder of this feeling too.
(I just can't believe it's true).


CANNOT make for a better song than:

Love is but a song we sing
And fear's the way we die.
You can make the mountains ring
Or make the angels cry.
Though the bird is on the wing
And you may not know why.
C'mon people now
Smile on your brother
Ev'rybody get together
Try to love one another right now


And when you add in the fact that The Youngbloods were a real band that could actually perform a song and The Archies were a studio band put together to make "music" for a cartoon . . . well, I don't think any more needs to be said.

I mean . . . "You are my candy girl, and you got me wanting you"??? "I just can't believe the loveliness of loving you"??? It's unlistenable.
   40. Dan 'The Boy' Werr Posted: February 17, 2006 at 03:57 PM (#1865898)
looking for a "compound" with lots of questions about the ATF

Pretty sure that was a joke.
   41. Dan 'The Boy' Werr Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:04 PM (#1865905)
And when you add in the fact that The Youngbloods were a real band that could actually perform a song and The Archies were a studio band put together to make "music" for a cartoon . . . well, I don't think any more needs to be said.

Well, those Youngbloods lyrics don't strike me as more profound than the Archies lyrics, which is bad, because I think they want to be. "Sugar Sugar" is a silly song and it knows it, but more than that, it's a fantastically written and arranged piece of music. The lyrics are largely irrelevant to me anyway, but I consider them a wash at best.

"Let's Get Together" reminds me of something that happened to my Dad in college. This guy wanted to start a band and wanted him to join. He said, "This band will have a revolutionary new message: Love."

Of course, this is all subjective.
   42. Jesse Barfield's Right Arm Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:11 PM (#1865917)
Combine that, though, with the multiple DUIs, restraining orders from former spouses (plus -the offhand way he dismisses the concerns of his former spouse), looking for a "compound" with lots of questions about the ATF, a cavalier attitude -- or, lack of attitude -- concerning good/evil or right/wrong ---

You're right, but if the New Age wackiness takes him away from DUI, wife troubles, etc. (destructive behavior that seems a residue of American celebrity culture), then I think it IS the help.
   43. Zonk demands an audit of your post Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:14 PM (#1865923)
Yup, you're right, Dan.

My bad - I did RTFA, but I intermingled a post here with what's in the article. Reading more carefully, maybe Daulton's more Syd Barrett than David Koresh.... though it's worth noting that Barrett's past has stories of more than just boorish behavior, too.
   44. Boots Day Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:17 PM (#1865929)
"Sugar Sugar" is a fine song, co-written by Jeff Barry, who wrote several Sixties classics, like "Baby I Love You" by the Ronettes, "Christmas Baby Please Come Home," and "Chapel of Love." It's a bit of a red herring to say it was performed by a cartoon band, because either it's well-played or it's not, no matter who the musicians were. Besides, Jughead was a hell of a drummer.

I can see someone preferring it to the treacly, faux-Buffalo Springfield "Let's Get Together." On the other hand, ain't no way it's better than "Everyday People."
   45. Charles S. is pretty fast for an old guy Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:22 PM (#1865942)
“The Mayan calendar stops at Dec. 21, 2012—the date the Mayans believed the world would end,” he says. “On that day, at 11:11 a.m. Greenwich Mean Time, those who are ready to ascend will vanish from this plane of existence..."


Call me an idiot for questioning the internal consistency of this insanity, but if it's the Mayan calendar, why would anything happen on Greenwich Mean Time? It's hard to imagine the Mayans had such a British-centric view of time.
   46. Greg Pope Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:37 PM (#1865969)
i don't think there will be a big interview on dec 22, 2012 asking "umm, what happened?"

these type of nonsensical predictions almost never get covered in followup questions. years ago, they used to be front page stories of real newspapers; now, they only make the front pages of the tabloids, but they still get press.


Did you read the article? The very next line to the quoted text is:

And if Judgment Day comes and nothing happens?

"I don't even concern myself with that," he says, breezily. "I just try to live in the Now."


I don't have a problem if he believes that a certain day will be Judgment Day, but how can you take the day from the Mayan calendar and mix in the time-keeping system from the Sumerians (base 60) and top it off with the Euro-centered concept of when the day starts (11 hours and 11 minutes from midnight that occurs in Greenwich England)?

He does mention that the Mayans were directed by aliens, so maybe the aliens also directed the Sumerians and British.
   47. Murray Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:37 PM (#1865970)
Or even a 24 hour clock.
   48. philevans3154 Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:38 PM (#1865972)
It's hard to imagine the Mayans had such a British-centric view of time.

1. In the movies, citizens of ancient civilations often speak with a British accent.

2. The Mayans were an ancient civilization.

3. The Mayans must be British.
   49. . . . . . . Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:46 PM (#1865990)
I was born at 11 o'clock on November 11th. My phone number when I was growing up had an 11 in it, I lived at the 11th floor of a building at 1105. My car's first license plate had "1111" in it.

Darren, I am your Messiah.
   50. jwb Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:52 PM (#1866007)
Fox Mulder would say Darren Daulton is on to something.

I might say Darren Daulton is on somrthing.

11-11 tie in the 11th: Game Played on Thursday, April 24, 1997 (D) at Oakland-Alameda County Coliseum. The Phillies had an off day to make the trek from Pittsburgh to Cincinnati, so he could have seen it on TV. But how easy was it to get out of market games in a hotel room/lounge in 1997?

"Sugar Sugar" is a fine song, co-written by Jeff Barry, who wrote several Sixties classics, like "Baby I Love You" by the Ronettes, "Christmas Baby Please Come Home," and "Chapel of Love."

"River Deep-Mountain High," anyone?
   51. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:53 PM (#1866011)
I don't have a problem if he believes that a certain day will be Judgment Day, but how can you take the day from the Mayan calendar and mix in the time-keeping system from the Sumerians (base 60) and top it off with the Euro-centered concept of when the day starts (11 hours and 11 minutes from midnight that occurs in Greenwich England)?

Typical limited thinking from those who cannot see the wholeness of all creation. There are no coincidences! All of these cultural frameworks contribute a piece of recognition of the fuller reality, and only by incorporating parts of each can we even begin to conceive the real unfolding story of the universe and our world's place in it. Not only can you take the Mayan calendar and Sumerian time-keeping and Euro-centered measures of days -- you MUST do so to avoid completely missing the wisdom Darren Daulton is trying to help you see.

Troglodyte.
   52. Bring Me the Head of Alfredo Griffin (Vlad) Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:55 PM (#1866015)
"Or even a 24 hour clock."

You mean four simultaneous 24-hour days, right?
   53. philevans3154 Posted: February 17, 2006 at 04:57 PM (#1866020)
You mean four simultaneous 24-hour days, right?

Boy, have I been educated stupid...
   54. Harlond Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:03 PM (#1866029)
"I've been thrown in jail five or six times," Daulton says from his home in Tampa. "Nicole thinks I'm crazy. She blames everything on drugs and drinking. But I don't take drugs and I'm not a drunk. Nicole just doesn't understand metaphysics."

Well, if that's why he threatened her or assaulted her, who can blame him?
   55. Mister High Standards Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:14 PM (#1866052)
If these beliefs bring peace of mind to Darren and they are not hurting anyone, I have no problem with them. I have a heck of a lot more of a problem with them being ridiculed.
   56. Mister High Standards Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:14 PM (#1866054)
If these beliefs bring peace of mind to Darren and they are not hurting anyone, I have no problem with them. I have a heck of a lot more of a problem with them being ridiculed.
   57. HowardMegdal Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:16 PM (#1866056)
I've been thrown in jail five or six times," Daulton says from his home in Tampa. "Nicole thinks I'm crazy. She blames everything on drugs and drinking. But I don't take drugs and I'm not a drunk. Nicole just doesn't understand metaphysics."


I was actually thrown out of NYU for cheating on my metaphysics final. I beat the crap out of the girl sitting next to me.
   58. Buford J. Sharkley Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:17 PM (#1866057)
"Sugar Sugar" is one of the most perfect songs ever written.

...In addition, a song's lyrics are completely and absolutely not related to how great a song is, except for cases of "extreme whimsy."

Both these statements, like most statements I make, are unquestionably correct.
   59. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:21 PM (#1866062)
In addition, a song's lyrics are completely and absolutely not related to how great a song is, except for cases of "extreme whimsy."

Is extreme whimsy good or bad? Randy Newman's entire career hangs in the balance . . . .
   60. AZ Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:22 PM (#1866066)
I was born at 11 o'clock on November 11th. My phone number when I was growing up had an 11 in it, I lived at the 11th floor of a building at 1105. My car's first license plate had "1111" in it.

Did you and Darren attend the first meeting of the Corduroy Appreciation Club, on 11/11? Because that's the number that most closely resembles corduroy.
   61. Barry`s_Lazy_Boy Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:24 PM (#1866067)
Call me an idiot for questioning the internal consistency of this insanity, but if it's the Mayan calendar, why would anything happen on Greenwich Mean Time? It's hard to imagine the Mayans had such a British-centric view of time.

All these things are happening simultaneously, so surely they are intertwined, just like 11 represents two strands of DNA trying to come together. Although I'm sure your limited mind can't understand, and for that I am truly sorry.
   62. HowardMegdal Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:27 PM (#1866074)
Did you and Darren attend the first meeting of the Corduroy Appreciation Club, on 11/11? Because that's the number that most closely resembles corduroy.

I assume you read about this in the New Yorker- I plan to wear corduroy every Nov. 11 after reading it...
   63. Charles S. is pretty fast for an old guy Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:30 PM (#1866076)
I was actually thrown out of NYU for cheating on my metaphysics final. I beat the crap out of the girl sitting next to me.

Excellent Woody Allen reference, and well twisted.
   64. Charles S. is pretty fast for an old guy Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:32 PM (#1866080)
Although I'm sure your limited mind can't understand, and for that I am truly sorry.

I did say "Call me an idiot," but I didn't expect you to do it in such an erudite manner.
   65. HowardMegdal Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:32 PM (#1866081)
Who's Woody Allen?
   66. Urban Faber Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:35 PM (#1866085)
I attended that game where Daulton had his epiphany. I don't remember anything strange - just the Alexander errors and some bizarre managing by Jim Riggleman that left him short of players at the end. Leyland brought Dutch into that game on a double switch (removing a perplexed Gary Sheffield to do so), therefore I guess he's the Cigarette Smoking Man of this X-Files story.

And Marilyn McCoo ... yes.
   67. AZ Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:36 PM (#1866086)
I assume you read about this in the New Yorker- I plan to wear corduroy every Nov. 11 after reading it...

Yeah. I wanted to go the second meeting on 1/11, but couldn't make it.
   68. HowardMegdal Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:39 PM (#1866090)
Is the next one on 11/11? Or will there be compromises to avoid the 10-month delay?

For those who hadn't seen this... Corduroy Club Meeting
   69. Steve Treder Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:52 PM (#1866108)
But it's not that Marilyn McCoo's vocals are too strong under any circumstances, it's just that they're too much for the music they're matched up with. If Aretha Franklin was singing "Respect" or "Think" with that accompaniment, I don't think it would work either. All I know is that when I hear the song, something about it always feels a little off to me.

Well said. The Fifth Dimension had several good elements working for them, certainly including McCoo's voice, but they were rarely able to put them all together properly.

A group working in a similar vein to The Fifth Dimension, also in LA at the same time, but meaningfully better was the Friends of Distinction. "Love or Let Me Be Lonely," "Going in Circles," and "Grazin' in the Grass" were exceptionally good: unique songs, interestingly arranged and very well performed.

And their producer was Jim Brown. So it's safe to assume they took no sh!t from nobody.
   70. Traderdave Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:54 PM (#1866109)
Typical limited thinking from those who cannot see the wholeness of all creation. There are no coincidences! All of these cultural frameworks contribute a piece of recognition of the fuller reality, and only by incorporating parts of each can we even begin to conceive the real unfolding story of the universe and our world's place in it. Not only can you take the Mayan calendar and Sumerian time-keeping and Euro-centered measures of days -- you MUST do so to avoid completely missing the wisdom Darren Daulton is trying to help you see.

You nailed it, Sam. Sounds like you've been to some of those channeling & crystals gigs.
   71. JC in DC Posted: February 17, 2006 at 05:59 PM (#1866113)
"Sugar Sugar" is a fine song, co-written by Jeff Barry, who wrote several Sixties classics, like "Baby I Love You" by the Ronettes, "Christmas Baby Please Come Home," and "Chapel of Love." It's a bit of a red herring to say it was performed by a cartoon band, because either it's well-played or it's not, no matter who the musicians were. Besides, Jughead was a hell of a drummer.

I can see someone preferring it to the treacly, faux-Buffalo Springfield "Let's Get Together." On the other hand, ain't no way it's better than "Everyday People."


A smart man posted this.
   72. Buford J. Sharkley Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:00 PM (#1866114)
Is extreme whimsy good or bad? Randy Newman's entire career hangs in the balance . . . .

Extreme whimsy is good.

...Randy Newman is not particularly close to being extremely whimsical, though.
   73. Boots Day Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:03 PM (#1866120)
A group working in a similar vein to The Fifth Dimension, also in LA at the same time, but meaningfully better was the Friends of Distinction.

There was a vocal group in L.A. in the early sixties called the Hi-Fi's, which basically split up into the Fifth Dimension and the Friends of Distinction.
   74. Lunkus Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:06 PM (#1866126)
Does any of this have anything to do with "Pass the Dutchie"?
   75. Buford J. Sharkley Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:13 PM (#1866135)
The Fifth Dimension sang what was probably an original composition for a video I watched in driver's ed class:

To wit:

Buckle up....
Buckle up....

Buckle up, buckle baby, before you drive
Buckle up, buckle baby, and stay alive
Buckle up, buckle baby, don't be a fool
Don't you know-- Dying ain't cool.

Buck - le - Up! (Baby, buckle down)
It's the word that's spreading around.
Buck - le - Up! (Baby, buckle down)
Start telling everyone in town.

Buckle up....


And so on. It was something.
   76. Traderdave Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:17 PM (#1866140)
Does Mr. Rockel still teach driver's ed at WHS?
   77. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:29 PM (#1866159)
There was a vocal group in L.A. in the early sixties called the Hi-Fi's, which basically split up into the Fifth Dimension and the Friends of Distinction.
Well now, I learned something today. And ditto to Steve Treder, FoD > 5D (although IMO, there's nothing wrong with 5D). And how did the FoD say "Dig It" so fast? I can never keep up with them.
   78. Hang down your head, Tom Foley Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:33 PM (#1866168)
EdmundoAtHome posted the 11th comment in this thread. He lives in Pennsylvania, the 2nd state (1+1, or Roman number II.) He has been married for 11 years for each of his children. Edmundo will be 55 this year and if you divide that by his member group ((05) Primates) and drink a half gallon of whiskey, you'll realize Darren Daulton is right about everything.
   79. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:35 PM (#1866176)
"Sugar Sugar" is a fine song . . .

A smart man posted this.


The second sentence is correct. Which just goes to show you that smart men can sometimes say things that are utterly and completely wrong. "Sugar Sugar" is an awful song (musically and lyrically), and one of the best measures of the extent to which high (or even any) quality is NOT a necessary component of success in American music. The idea that "Sugar Sugar" was one of the top 10 singles in the United States in 1969 is just appalling.

I do, however, like those other songs written by Jeff Barry, especially River Deep-Mountain High, which is a genuinely great song.
   80. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:42 PM (#1866184)
Thanks, Ben. Now I won't be able to sleep at night, fearing that Dutch will be looking for me.
   81. bob gee Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:43 PM (#1866185)
passing the dutchie? donna summer calls, wanting some unconditional love...

sugar sugar is what it is - general low quality pap (sic). the best place for it is in a stars on 45 or jive bunny, where it can be heard for about 10-15 seconds before going onto the next song - in this case, cathy's clown...

jeff and ellie wrote some good songs...
   82. Boots Day Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:50 PM (#1866194)
I'm just a sucker for good bubblegum pop. Besides, nonsense lyrics have a long and valorous history in American music, cf. "Long Tall Sally," "Do Wah Diddy," "Good Morning, Starshine," "Gates of Eden," etc.
   83. Devin has a deep burning passion for fuzzy socks Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:50 PM (#1866195)
I only know one song by them, but another group that might fit in the same vein as 5D/FoD is The Free Design (although allmusic.com compares them to the Cowsills and the Association.) But "I Found Love" is a great, simple little pop song, and my 3rd favorite song off the Gilmore Girls soundtrack (behind XTC's "The Man Who Murdered Love" and Joey Ramone's kick-ass cover of "What a Wonderful World").
   84. Urban Faber Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:57 PM (#1866209)
Besides, nonsense lyrics have a long and valorous history in American music

... me gotta go.
   85. John Seal Posted: February 17, 2006 at 06:58 PM (#1866210)
I enjoy both Sugar Sugar, which is a brainless pop masterpiece, AND Get Together, which is the finest piece of hippie drivel ever written. And if you own the album it's on, you also get the jaunty Grizzly Bear for your troubles.

The Fifth Dimension never did it for me, though. But then I don't like harmony pop much. Though I imagine Darren Daulton quite likes The Johnny Mann Singers.
   86. Steve Treder Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:02 PM (#1866215)
I enjoy both Sugar Sugar, which is a brainless pop masterpiece, AND Get Together, which is the finest piece of hippie drivel ever written.

I like them both, but I agree with the comment that "Sugar Sugar" doesn't commit the offense that "Get Together" does, of taking itself seriously.
   87. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:02 PM (#1866216)
the finest piece of hippie drivel ever written

The finest? I don't know . . . . Scott McKenzie has to be a contender with San Francisco (Be Sure to Wear Some Flowers in Your Hair).
   88. Steve Treder Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:07 PM (#1866222)
The finest? I don't know . . . . Scott McKenzie has to be a contender with San Francisco (Be Sure to Wear Some Flowers in Your Hair).

That one was a beaut, for sure. So was Barry Maguire's "Eve of Destruction." As was Jim Nabors, of all people, singing "Reach Out Into Darkness."
   89. John Seal Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:12 PM (#1866228)
San Francisco IS a good candidate--forgot about that one. And Eve of Destruction is great, but not so much hippie-esque as Dylan-esque.
   90. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:15 PM (#1866233)
“On that day, at 11:11 a.m. Greenwich Mean Time, those who are ready to ascend will vanish from this plane of existence, like the crew of the Enterprise in Star Trek.”

Is this serious? If you're describing your deeply held beliefs, I'd try to omit the phrase "like the crew of the Enterprise in Star Trek."


Good point. Replace "the crew of the Enterprise in Star Trek" with "John Kruk's left nut."
   91. Steve Treder Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:15 PM (#1866234)
And Eve of Destruction is great, but not so much hippie-esque as Dylan-esque.

Good point. All full of self-righteous bluster, instead of being all full of idiotic bliss.
   92. vortex of dissipation Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:24 PM (#1866243)
But forget Darren Daulton. I rise today in defense of the Fifth Dimension! "Airy confections"??? Marilyn McCoo sings her heart out, asking the age-old question, "Won't you marry me, Bill (Davis, Jr.)?" and we call it an "airy confection"? This was one of the great ones, people! Groups like Fleetwood Mac owe them a debt for paving the way for the future musical tellings of intra-group personal soap operas.

As another poster has pointed out, "Wedding Bell Blues" was a Laura Nyro song, which she wrote and recorded in 1966, long before the Fifth Dimension existed. Her original version is sung to a "Bill", so the fact that the name in the song mirrored a real-life situation was more coincidence than anything. I'm not a huge Fifth Dimension fan, but I loved Laura Nyro, and I have to give kudos to the FD for getting several of Nyro's songs on the radio.

As for the other songs, Wilson Pickett's version of "Sugar Sugar" absolutely smokes. The perfect example of the singer, not the song.

And just to be really picky, the Youngbloods didn't write "Get Together" - it was written by Dino Valenti (later of Quicksilver Messenger Service) under the name of Chet Powers. Lots of bands recorded it, including Jefferson Airplane (good version), and the Dave Clark Five (not so good). The Youngbloods' version was album filler that languished for two years until it was used in an interfaith TV promo spot, and took off.
   93. vortex of dissipation Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:34 PM (#1866255)
OK, perhaps not album filler - I checked, and "Get Together" was released as a single when the Youngbloods first album was released, but it only got to #62. It wasn't until it was used in the interfaith spots two years later that it became a hit.

"Sunlight" and "Ride the Wind" are much better Youngbloods songs, anyway...
   94. Boots Day Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:34 PM (#1866256)
For that matter, Scott Mackenzie didn't write "San Francisco" (Papa John Phillips did), and Barry McGuire didn't write "Eve of Destruction" (P.F. Sloan did).

But I'm pretty sure Reggie Mantle gets a credit on "Sugar Sugar."
   95. Steve Treder Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:39 PM (#1866262)
Three Dog Night was another truly excellent vocal-harmony pop group in that period, who recorded some great quirky Laura Nyro songs. "Eli's Coming" was my favorite.
   96. Steve Treder Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:42 PM (#1866266)
Best Quicksilver Messenger Service song ever: "Fresh Air," with Valenti caterwauling all over the place.
   97. Van Lingle Mungo Jerry Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:43 PM (#1866268)
More hippie drivel:
"Where Have All The Flowers Gone"
"She Ran Calling Wild Fire"
"I'm Gonna Catch That Horse If I Can"

Hmmm ... two songs about flowers (if you count Scott McKenzie's aforementioned drivel) and two about horses. Anyone care to break the deadlock?
   98. Sam M. Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:46 PM (#1866272)
Her original version is sung to a "Bill", so the fact that the name in the song mirrored a real-life situation was more coincidence than anything.

Party pooper. I will, nevertheless, continue to have my little fantasy of Marilyn McCoo singing the song to a surprised Billy Davis, Jr., as a way to prompt him to get off the pot and marry her.

And it's still a far better song than Sugar Sugar.
   99. vortex of dissipation Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:47 PM (#1866274)
Steve Treder Posted: February 17, 2006 at 02:42 PM (#1866266)
Best Quicksilver Messenger Service song ever: "Fresh Air," with Valenti caterwauling all over the place.


Better than "Pride of Man"?
   100. Steve Treder Posted: February 17, 2006 at 07:51 PM (#1866279)
I will, nevertheless, continue to have my little fantasy of Marilyn McCoo singing the song to a surprised Billy Davis, Jr.

I've had many a fantasy about Marilyn McCoo, and sorry Sam, but Billy Davis Jr. is never involved.
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