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Friday, August 26, 2011

TMZ: Lenny Dykstra Charged with Indecent Exposure Over Craigslist Encounters

Guess Nails showed those women more than his nails:

More trouble for Lenny Dykstra—this time the troubled baseball great has been charged with indecent exposure for allegedly whipping out his dong for women he met on Craigslist.

According to the L.A. City Attorney, Lenny allegedly went to Craigslist and posted ads for a personal assistant or housekeeping services ... but when the women arrived, Dykstra would “inform the women that the job also required them to give a massage and would expose himself to them.”

Officials say Dykstra pulled the XXX bait and switch at least 6 times.

If convicted, Dykstra—who’s already in custody in L.A. on a MYRIAD of federal and state charges for allegedly doing all sorts of other bad stuff—could face even more jail time.

An arraignment is scheduled for September 7.

AndrewJ Posted: August 26, 2011 at 12:32 AM | 59 comment(s) Login to Bookmark
  Tags: mets, online, phillies

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   1. LionoftheSenate Posted: August 26, 2011 at 05:06 AM (#3909313)
Didn't the Brewers deal Cutter Dykstra for Nyjer Morgan? "Ash tray money bro!", says Doug Melvin.
   2. Walks Clog Up the Bases Posted: August 26, 2011 at 05:09 AM (#3909314)
I often roll my eyes at the inane setup a lot of non-gonzo porn scenes have, because hey, you don't lure the women in with such lame pick-ups unless you're absurd good looking or wealthy. Lenny Dykstra, who is neither of those things, apparently doesn't share my sentiment.
   3. Traderdave Posted: August 26, 2011 at 05:27 AM (#3909323)
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=EYlDbv7MqE8
   4. Anonymous Observer Posted: August 26, 2011 at 05:28 AM (#3909324)
He took it out.
   5. Tuque Posted: August 26, 2011 at 05:36 AM (#3909326)
Six times? Six times?? Jesus, you'd think after it didn't work the first two times he would just give up.
   6. Athletic Supporter is USDA certified lean Posted: August 26, 2011 at 05:39 AM (#3909329)
Six times? Six times?? Jesus, you'd think after it didn't work the first two times he would just give up.


Well, we haven't heard about all the times it DID work.
   7. The District Attorney Posted: August 26, 2011 at 06:06 AM (#3909335)
He took it out.
How could this be??
   8. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: August 26, 2011 at 06:20 AM (#3909345)
Six times? Six times?? Jesus, you'd think after it didn't work the first two times he would just give up.

Dykstra to his dick: "Don't worry, we'll get 'em tomorrow, Skip!"
   9. RollingWave Posted: August 26, 2011 at 07:30 AM (#3909358)
guess the month isn't complete without a crazy Dykstra story
   10. Jefferson Manship (Dan Lee) Posted: August 26, 2011 at 09:26 AM (#3909365)
"Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, my client didn't know what else to do, so he resorted to Option J. I ask you: When the going gets tough, who among us hasn't whipped it out?"
   11. valuearbitrageur Posted: August 26, 2011 at 10:00 AM (#3909366)
Now they are just piling on...
   12. Greg K Posted: August 26, 2011 at 10:02 AM (#3909367)
If convicted, Dykstra—who’s already in custody in L.A. on a MYRIAD of federal and state charges for allegedly doing all sorts of other bad stuff—could face even more jail time.

I was impressed to see that she made proper use of the word 'myriad' in their report.

Actually I was more surprised to see that that actually is a correct way to use "myriad". I've been living a lie all these years. I wonder if there are any other ways in which "Heathers" has led me astray.
   13. Jefferson Manship (Dan Lee) Posted: August 26, 2011 at 10:06 AM (#3909368)
I wonder if there are any other ways in which "Heathers" has led me astray.
You haven't been following Big Fun from city to city on their world tour, have you?
   14. Shooty would run in but these bone spurs hurt! Posted: August 26, 2011 at 11:25 AM (#3909377)
This makes me wonder what Troy Neel is up to these days.
   15. bfan Posted: August 26, 2011 at 11:39 AM (#3909380)
There is something wrong the a system that can be manipulated and used to let someone who is continuously doing harm to others be free to continue to do harm.
   16. Bob Evans Posted: August 26, 2011 at 12:21 PM (#3909390)
a MYRIAD of federal and state charges

They made that look like an acronym, like of a secret agency of evil or something.
   17. My name is Votto, and I love to get blotto Posted: August 26, 2011 at 12:44 PM (#3909403)
He needs a lesson from Coco Crisp.
   18. Edmundo got dem ol' Kozma blues again mama Posted: August 26, 2011 at 12:47 PM (#3909408)
This looks to end in suicide, doesn't it?
   19. Jefferson Manship (Dan Lee) Posted: August 26, 2011 at 12:48 PM (#3909409)
They made that look like an acronym, like of a secret agency of evil or something.

Mets of Yesteryear Revealing Investments And Dicks.
   20. Adam B. Posted: August 26, 2011 at 12:57 PM (#3909417)
   21. Biff, highly-regarded young guy Posted: August 26, 2011 at 12:59 PM (#3909421)
I often roll my eyes at the inane setup a lot of non-gonzo porn scenes have, because hey, you don't lure the women in with such lame pick-ups unless you're absurd good looking or wealthy. Lenny Dykstra, who is neither of those things, apparently doesn't share my sentiment.

"You can imagine where it goes from here."
"He fixes the cable?"
   22. BDC Posted: August 26, 2011 at 01:10 PM (#3909428)
All I took in from the headline was "Indecent Exposure Over Craigslist" and I wondered what new features Craigslist had developed recently.
   23. just plain joe Posted: August 26, 2011 at 01:15 PM (#3909432)
All I took in from the headline was "Indecent Exposure Over Craigslist" and I wondered what new features Craigslist had developed recently.


Is there ever such a thing as "decent exposure", or does that come under the same category as "timely death"?
   24. Jefferson Manship (Dan Lee) Posted: August 26, 2011 at 01:21 PM (#3909438)
I imagine taking your shirt off at the beach is decent exposure. Unless you're Rich Garces.
   25. RoyalsRetro (AG#1F) Posted: August 26, 2011 at 01:36 PM (#3909452)
Never saw him take his junk out.
   26. chemdoc Posted: August 26, 2011 at 01:38 PM (#3909455)
Meanwhile, Steve Lyons is allowed to roam freely.
   27. Greg K Posted: August 26, 2011 at 01:38 PM (#3909457)
Is there ever such a thing as "decent exposure",

I guess you could argue strip clubs deal in "decent exposure"...though not the ones I've been to.
   28. Misirlou cut his hair and moved to Rome Posted: August 26, 2011 at 01:47 PM (#3909471)
   29. puck Posted: August 26, 2011 at 02:02 PM (#3909481)
All I took in from the headline was "Indecent Exposure Over Craigslist" and I wondered what new features Craigslist had developed recently.


They're the latest company to buy Skype.
   30. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: August 26, 2011 at 07:14 PM (#3909778)
Is there ever such a thing as "decent exposure", or does that come under the same category as "timely death"?

If the 1980s rumors about naked Dykstra were true, he qualifies as "more than decent exposure."
   31. Swedish Chef Posted: August 26, 2011 at 07:23 PM (#3909785)
This looks to end in suicide, doesn't it?

Dykstra doesn't seem to be one to brood over his failures. Not that they're his failures, everything is the fault of others.

And why would he think of suicide when a fortune from options trading/publishing/drug dealing is just months away? That will show them.
   32. Tripon Posted: August 26, 2011 at 07:28 PM (#3909791)
Yeah, guys like Dykstra don't commit suicide. He's going to die in a ditch because somebody put a couple of bullets into him.
   33. The Long Arm of Rudy Law Posted: August 26, 2011 at 07:33 PM (#3909797)
Pre-Craigslist, David Cone did it the old-fashioned way. Of course, he had access to a major league bullpen.
   34. Bob Evans Posted: August 26, 2011 at 07:36 PM (#3909799)
Props to the acronym master, Dan Lee.

Yeah, guys like Dykstra don't commit suicide. He's going to die in a ditch because somebody put a couple of bullets into him.

It will *look* like a suicide.
   35. Alex_Lewis Posted: August 26, 2011 at 07:49 PM (#3909808)
If the 1980s rumors about naked Dykstra were true, he qualifies as "more than decent exposure."


What rumors?
   36. Greg K Posted: August 26, 2011 at 08:39 PM (#3909833)
What rumors?

Hey, they didn't call him "Moose Penis" for nothing.
   37. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: August 26, 2011 at 08:43 PM (#3909839)
Apparently Dykstra was proud enough of Li'l Lenny that he used to strut out of the shower buffing it with a separate towel. Enjoy your meals, everyone!
   38. The Long Arm of Rudy Law Posted: August 26, 2011 at 09:11 PM (#3909851)
Apparently Dykstra was proud enough of Li'l Lenny that he used to strut out of the shower buffing it with a separate towel. Enjoy your meals, everyone!


I'd bet he calls it "Mookie." Or maybe Lenny Dickstra.
   39. ERROR---Jolly Old St. Nick Posted: August 26, 2011 at 09:22 PM (#3909860)
Semi-serious question:

Has there ever been a baseball player as thoroughly sleazy as Dykstra? Not murderous, not racist, just down home sleazy.

The closest comparison that comes to mind is Denny McLain, but there must be others. Or maybe not.
   40. Swedish Chef Posted: August 26, 2011 at 09:24 PM (#3909861)
The closest comparison that comes to mind is Denny McLain, but there must be others. Or maybe not.

I guess Pete Rose is on the similarity list, but he seems to have a bit more common sense.
   41. ERROR---Jolly Old St. Nick Posted: August 26, 2011 at 09:30 PM (#3909864)
Okay, there's now

Dykstra
McLain
Rose

Let's keep this thing going.
   42. vortex of dissipation Posted: August 26, 2011 at 09:34 PM (#3909866)
Has there ever been a baseball player as thoroughly sleazy as Dykstra? Not murderous, not racist, just down home sleazy.


Hal Chase was pretty sleazy. In addition to the throwing games thing, he had a reputation for sleeping with the wives/girlfriends of his teammates.
   43. akrasian Posted: August 26, 2011 at 10:16 PM (#3909885)
Hal Chase was pretty sleazy. In addition to the throwing games thing, he had a reputation for sleeping with the wives/girlfriends of his teammates.


Not throwing games, but weren't the rumors about Rafael Palmeiro when he was with the Cubs that he did the same thing?
   44. Alex_Lewis Posted: August 26, 2011 at 10:22 PM (#3909891)
Hey, they didn't call him "Moose Penis" for nothing.


I'm still not sure what this means, but I have a few guesses.
   45. Captain Joe Bivens, Elderly Northeastern Jew Posted: August 26, 2011 at 10:33 PM (#3909895)
You really only need one guess.
   46. Leroy Kincaid Posted: August 26, 2011 at 10:45 PM (#3909899)
Can it be grasped with moose knuckles?
   47. Andere Richtingen Posted: August 26, 2011 at 11:02 PM (#3909909)
After a particularly virulent case of the clap, it grew antlers.
   48. Shooty would run in but these bone spurs hurt! Posted: August 26, 2011 at 11:07 PM (#3909915)
I'm still not sure what this means, but I have a few guesses.

I think it's because a flying squirrel shoots out of it at climax.
   49. The Long Arm of Rudy Law Posted: August 26, 2011 at 11:25 PM (#3909927)
Has there ever been a baseball player as thoroughly sleazy as Dykstra? Not murderous, not racist, just down home sleazy


When Darren Dreifort ate small children, he used to start from their feet so he could hear their screams as long as possible.
   50. Biscuit_pants Posted: August 26, 2011 at 11:32 PM (#3909932)
I'm still not sure what this means, but I have a few guesses.

I think it's because a flying squirrel shoots out of it at climax.
At least the squirrel has protection on.
   51. Gonfalon Bubble Posted: August 27, 2011 at 12:23 AM (#3909958)
Has there ever been a baseball player as thoroughly sleazy as Dykstra?

During the rootin-tootin Mets era, Dykstra was once having sex with a woman in the middle of the clubhouse. Darryl Strawberry walked by, and ever the gentleman, said, "Save me a piece of that."

Also, because of that spectacular 1987 collision in left center, I'm pretty sure Mookie Wilson caught herpes, syphilis, chlamydia, genital warts and beri-beri.
   52. Rollie Fingers' moustache Posted: August 27, 2011 at 01:12 AM (#3910001)
Hey, they didn't call him "Moose Penis" for nothing.



Because he pulled something besides a lion out of a hat?
   53. Banta Posted: August 27, 2011 at 01:33 AM (#3910016)
Let's keep this thing going.

Kenny Powers?
   54. Ron J Posted: August 27, 2011 at 02:42 AM (#3910076)
It's an interesting comment on how police of the day were viewed that after Jim Devlin was banned from baseball (for taking bribes to throw games) he ended up as a policeman.

Jerry Priddy? Convicted of extortion. Threatened to put a bomb on a ship if he wasn't paid $250K
   55. Ron J Posted: August 27, 2011 at 03:04 AM (#3910086)
Also there's a moderately confusing story about a player (blanking on who) in WWI who abandoned his wife and was somehow involved in something that looked a lot like draft evasion. Claiming his mistress was his wife or something. Sorry for the fuzzy (lack of) details.

Don't know how Mike Donlin fits into the sleazeball category. He had a lot of problems, including prison time for beating up an actress, but they all stemmed from the fact that he was an angry drunk who drank heavily.
   56. J. Sosa Posted: August 27, 2011 at 04:20 AM (#3910118)
Clemens has to be up there Andy. I do not know what happened at what time with McCready, but Clemens is hard to top for sleaze given McCready and throwing his wife under the bus in testimony. * Do wife beaters qualify as sleaze or is that more in line with "murderous". If not, I'd have to say Brett Myers tops my list. I try not to wish ill on people but I would not shed any tears if he got run over by a truck.

* When the stuff about Clemens came out it just about killed my father. He loved Clemens for years and blamed Duquette for everything.
   57. Ron J Posted: August 27, 2011 at 10:25 AM (#3910166)
#56 What bus throwing?

As for McCready, we've got actual rape convictions. We've got a player who shot a black man because he didn't like the guy's attitude (No not Ty Cobb, Danny Shay.)

And in the context of professional athletes and young women the only really remarkable thing about McCready is that she's famous in her own right.
   58. J. Sosa Posted: August 27, 2011 at 10:54 AM (#3910171)
re: 57

You are correct regarding his wife, my recollection of the testimony was that Clemens said something like "I didn't use HGH, but my wife sure did" but that is not the case. I'll let you decide whether what actually was said regarding the HGH qualifies as sleazy or not.

As for the rape, I think that kind of goes without saying as does shooting people. Andy's criteria was not including "murderous". Obviously Castro and the guy the Mariners traded for in the Lee deal are above wife beaters as are players who've shot people if you remove that caveat.

As for your last comment regarding McCready, I'm not sure where you are coming from there. Whether it is remarkable or not in the entertainment and sports world is beside the point. I think the relationship was creepy and inappropriate. It may be normal in R Kelly's world, but I don't think that makes it less sleazy.
   59. Dan The Mediocre is one of "the rest" Posted: August 27, 2011 at 11:51 AM (#3910177)
As for your last comment regarding McCready, I'm not sure where you are coming from there. Whether it is remarkable or not in the entertainment and sports world is beside the point. I think the relationship was creepy and inappropriate. It may be in R Kelly's world, but I don't think that makes it less sleazy.


We have to consider them to be particularly sleazy for ballplayers, otherwise the list would be way too long. What Clemens did doesn't seem particularly sleazy in that context.

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